


Song of a Dragonborn

by Psilocybinlemon



Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Fairy Tail
Genre: Adventure, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Skyrim Fusion, Angst, Dragons, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fantasy, Hurt/Comfort, Magic, Romance, Romantic Friendship, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:54:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 85,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23631940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Psilocybinlemon/pseuds/Psilocybinlemon
Summary: "But no-one wanted to believe. Believe they even existed. And when the truth finally dawns... it dawns in fire."Lucy, the only daughter of a merchant family in Helgen, had always wanted to be a mage. However, her parents wouldn't let her join the mage's college, and so she only dreamt of fierce battles and powerful spells while counting the coins of the store’s cash register. And one day, the most unexpectant event throws her life into chaos as another cart of prisoners arrives at the city.Natsu, an adept fire mage from the College of Winterhold got caught while doing an illegal job, and the Legion transferred him to Helgen to be executed. When he lays his head on the block, a dragon attacks the city – a creature no-one had seen in centuries. Almost as if fate brought it here this day.Lucy awakes in the middle of smoke and fire to find her home burned to ashes. A young mage saves her from the dragon’s flames, and then begins an adventure Lucy had been waiting for her entire life.
Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Lucy Heartfilia
Comments: 108
Kudos: 155





	1. SHADOWS UNBOUND

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Welcome to read my Fairy Tail x Skyrim story! 
> 
> **As the warnings said, this story contains graphic violence and character deaths. There is also swearing, mentions of rape, alcohol usage, possible mentions of drug usage, and maybe a few other things which might not be suitable for young and sensitive readers.**
> 
> **This story is entirely set up in the universe of Skyrim and Skyrim's lore.** The characters didn't teleport from Earthland to Skyrim, but they were born there and lived their lives in lore-friendly ways. Their backstories are different, they are a bit different from Fairy Tail canon, because everything is made to fit into Skyrim. Fairy Tail doesn't exist, but the College of Winterhold resembles the guild.
> 
> I know some of you might not know Skyrim, but don't worry! This should be understandable even if you know only Fairy Tail. If you want to invest more into the lore, at least watch the game's trailer (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSRtYpNRoN0) to get a vague grasp of wtf is going on. And if you want to know more without playing the game, just ask me in the comments if something is unclear and I'll explain it! AND if you know only Skyrim, don't worry either. You don't have to know anything about Fairy Tail, but some jokes and references might not open if you don't know the series. 
> 
> In January 2021, I added screenshots from the game to the ends of each chapter to show some of the places to you. The screenshots are taken from The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Special Edition and edited by me, except for the map which I found from Google. The screenshots won't contain blood, gore or violence. They might not be exact locations from the game, some might be from similar looking places which fit better into the story. 
> 
> Also published in fanfiction.net
> 
> Are you excited? You should be.

_"And the Scrolls have foretold, of black wings in the cold, that when brothers wage war come unfurled! Alduin, bane of Kings, ancient shadow unbound, with a hunger to swallow the world!"  
  
_

When thunder rumbled in the distance, Lucy imagined it was the mighty roar of the long lost dragons.

Stormclouds as dark as the blackbird’s wings loomed in the horizon as a raven circled around the halo of the sun. It would rain soon, and it was a welcomed change. The crops had been suffering from the long drought, and the wells were running dry. Tonight lightning would split the skies and the gods would play their drums of war – that’s what parents told their children when the thunder came. But Lucy had always thought it was dragons fighting behind the veil of clouds, even though there hadn’t been dragons in Skyrim for centuries.

Lucy stood on the porch of her home, leaning to a wooden parapet and observing how the city woke up to a new day. Children played, dogs barked, people hurried to their duties. Nobody seemed to mind the upcoming storm as if no-one even heard the remote rumbles. Haming, a lumberjack’s boy ran past the house and smiled at her. Lucy replied with a smile as she had been told to. A proper shopkeeper should smile to everyone, and so the customers would come.  
  
Mother would open the shop at any moment, but Lucy hoped to bask in the morning sun for a moment longer. She’d store the sunlight into herself to survive another day indoors. She wasn’t made for her job, but in Skyrim, people lived the lives they were born into. A child born into a farmer’s family would be a farmer. A child born into a merchant’s family would be a merchant – like Lucy. As the only child of their family, she didn’t have any other options. Selling trinkets, odds and ends would be the only life she’d ever know, and dreaming was her only escape.  
  
Lucy turned her gaze to the sky and let the cool autumn wind play with her fair hair. She closed her eyes, allowing her mind to carry her away, into the faraway lands she’d never visit. The books of the ancient legends and heroes brought her the solace of escapism, and so she set herself into those stories. She imagined herself as a brave sorcerer as her great-grandmother had been. Magic had once passed down her maternal family line, but it weakened with every generation which lived in its absence.

Her parents had blamed Haming for planting such wild dreams into their daughter’s head, but it wasn’t true. In addition to the stories she read, it was the mages who sometimes visited their store and asked if they sold potions or spells. Potions they had, but spellbooks were forbidden. As Nords often did, her parents despised magic and its users. Especially her father. He had made sure Lucy would never lay her hands on a book of magic, but he couldn’t stop her from talking to those mages.

When father wasn’t hearing, Lucy had exchanged wonderful conversations with the mages, and heard stories of the College of Winterhold. Its reputation had been stained over the years, but Lucy adored the things magic could do. In her wildest, most secret dreams she ran away from this damned town, found the sealed powers of magic within herself and joined the College. But they remained as dreams. Such a thing would never happen, _never_ , or father would catch her and chop off her head and feed it to the goats.

Still, her dreams were all she had. Detaching herself from counting the coins kept her sane. While ancient heroes had made themselves into the pages of history, she would become nothing more than a page in the sales registry.

A commotion from the edge of the town drew her back to the real world. The gates opened and guards let the wagons in. The Imperial Legion arrived at Helgen with another bunch of prisoners. It had happened weekly, lately. Thunder rattled in the distance again as the storm crept near. Would they get the execution over with before it would start to rain?

Executions had become public entertainment as the Empire punished wrongdoers and deceivers with death. Lucy didn’t like to watch those shows. But today, as the wagons passed by her house and her eyes caught Ulfric Stormcloak sitting on the cart, her interest peaked. What was the Jarl of Windhelm, who claimed himself as the new High King of Skyrim, doing there?

Three wagons full of prisoners arrived, all of them sentenced to die. Each one of them carried four men, so twelve lives would end this day. One of the prisoners in the last cart gazed at Lucy. He was a young man with hair the colour of a nightshade, dressed in black mage’s robes. He turned away the moment Lucy noticed him looking. Another man in robes sat beside him. Since when had the Empire targeted mages?

”Lucy, come inside”, mother hollered from the door.

”They’re executing Ulfric Stormcloack”, Lucy answered, refusing to move. From the silence Lucy knew mother would stay, too. The wagons stopped at the plaza and men formed in lines, as the priestess of Arkay gave them their last rites. Then an Imperial commander ordered one of the mages to the block first. They started with the runts, leaving Ulfric the Usurper for the last.

”Those are mages from the College of Winterhold”, mother said, pointing at them. ”You still want to join that college?”

Lucy shook her head, lying. She didn’t know what those men had done, but judging from the way the Empire punished people for stepping on a chicken’s stool, they hadn’t _necessarily_ done anything wrong.

Thunder rumbled again, louder than before, catching Lucy’s attention for a moment. It didn’t sound like a regular storm anymore, as if it was something else. The soldiers raised their eyes to the skies but deemed it as nothing abnormal and carried on.

Then the executioner raised his axe and swung. A sickening thump filled the silence as a man’s head dropped to the ground. Lucy’s stomach sank as sickness spread inside of her. She _hated_ these damn executions. The guards dragged the headless body away and kicked the rolling, lonely head to the side before pushing another victim to the block. The mage who had looked at her, the one with pink hair, writhed and screamed with tears running down his face as the guards dragged him forward.

”A man should face his death bravely, not crying like a milk-drinker”, father said behind her, having appeared while the first mage had died. ”Those mages are nothing but pests to this country. Good to get rid of them.”

Lucy wanted to punch his father for saying that. She watched silently as the guards forced the mage to the block and pressed him down with their foot. He was barely older than Lucy, a way too young to die. Lucy knew he didn’t cry for his death, but the death of his fallen comrade, whose head was still rolling down the plaza. Lucy held hands over her mouth as the headsman raised his axe again.

But then a deafening roar filled the skies. The axe dropped, missing the mage’s head by mere inches. Completely startled, Lucy lifted up her gaze and her legs went weak. A giant, black creature spread its wings over the sun, shadowing the entire plaza. It landed on a watchtower and screeched, and the bright, cloudless skies turned into a battlefield of stormclouds.

”What in Oblivion is that!?” father cried and grabbed mother while Lucy crawled to the cover of the stone wall. Shivering in pure fear, she knew exactly what that thing was. Straight from the childrens storybooks, the sign of the end times. Black horns and fangs as long as a man.

_A dragon._

The creature roared again, now breathing fire. Stone and wood came crumbling down under the dragon’s will. One of the dropping rocks hit Lucy’s head, blurring her vision until everything was dark.

* * *

”Hey, girl, wake up. Wake up now. We have to get out of here.”

Someone pulled her away from burning heat, her head and heart pounding. She cracked her eyes open and saw the pink-haired mage grabbing her wrists and dragging her out of the collapsed wall. Behind him was an utter desolation: flames and black smoke filled the air, the buildings were ruined, and dead bodies littered all over the streets. Surviving people ran around aimlessly, looking for shelter, only to be crushed by flying stones.

The mage helped Lucy on her feet, supporting her to stand. The hem of her yellow dress was torn and cuts adorned her bare shins, but she couldn’t feel any pain. Panic spreading in her chest, she looked around to find her family. ”My parents… are they safe?” Lucy stuttered, tears pouring from her eyes.

”You mean those?” the man said and pointed at two unrecognisable, scorched corpses lying on the remains of the porch. Lucy screamed and strength escaped from her legs. The mage forced her back up. ”Leave them behind or you’ll die, too!”

The black dragon flew low right above them, and the air it pushed forward with its wings threw them both from their feet again. The mage protected her from the broken, sharp boards, agilely rose up and took Lucy’s hand. Shock petrified her as hot air got stuck in her windpipe.

Her entire life had turned to ashes in a matter of minutes.

”C’mon, let’s go”, he urged and pulled her hand in a hurry. Lucy stole one last glance on the remains of her parents, swallowed hard and turned away. The escape she’d dreamed of was suddenly forced upon her as no choice than to escape. Trembling, Lucy nodded to the man and then they ran, trying to find a way out of the burning town as the dragon soared through the black smoke.

Soldiers readied their bows and launched the arrows towards the flying beast, but they just bounced back and rained down. Knowing the city better than her pockets, Lucy looked for the East Gate, knowing it was right behind the watchtower. The stone walls of the town had crumbled down with the gate, giving them an opening if they’d survive through the shelterless plaza. Adrenaline pumped through her veins, giving her strength to act, ignore the pain and fight for survival.

”There!” she shouted, raising her voice over the racket and uproar. She began to ran, but the mage froze beside her. He watched how a little boy tried to reach the collapsed wall, and the dragon noticed his efforts to escape. Lucy gasped in terror as the child disappeared into the inferno of the dragon’s breath.

One by one, the citizens of Helgen fell to the flames of something which wasn’t supposed to exist. Dizziness flooding over her, Lucy caught the mage’s hand again so she wouldn’t faint. ’ _This just can’t be happening!’_ she repeated in her head. _’This has to be a nightmare!’_

”Wait”, the man said and locked eyes with the dragon. It had landed on the watchtower again. ”Run across this plaza when I say so.”

Lucy nodded to him, and the mage formed a fireball on his hand.

”Now!” he shouted and threw the ball towards the dragon. It exploded at the top of the tower, leaving a blinding cloud of dust and smoke in its wake. Taking advantage of the confusion, they ran to the broken wall and climbed through the hole. Even though they made it outside the town’s walls, but they weren’t safe. Not yet.

Following the mage, Lucy ran into the forest, ran until the screams of the town silenced. She jumped over the fallen trees, ignored the scratches the branches left on her face, just ran, ran and ran for her life. Lucy’s mind went blank and white, exhaustion burning in her lungs and legs, but she kept going until they reached the depths of the forest, silence falling around them.  
  
The man stopped near large rocks and hid behind them. Lucy collapsed next to him and leaned to the boulder, trying to curl into as small as she could. Gasping for breath, she squeezed her eyes closed, seeing nothing but her parents scorched to death. Surrounded by pines and spruces, she didn’t feel safe. She probably never would, ever again. Not after today, when her whole world burned down. Dragons weren’t supposed to exist, but now they did.

A powerful sob shook her. She tried to suffocate it, but failed. As tears blurred her vision, she glanced at the mage. The man shivered in a catatonic state, his green, hollow eyes staring at a tree stump in front of him. Lucy could see his pain, and it comforted her in a twisted way. At least she wasn’t all alone in this chaos. She would have died without his help. Yet it felt so unfair to be alive, she was glad she was still breathing.

”H… Hey –” she started, but the mage silenced her with a shush. He put his finger on his lips, giving her a strict look. Lucy lowered her voice and whispered, ”Th… Thank y… you. What’s… your name?”

The man shook his head, eyes gleaming in gloom. Though Lucy wanted to know the name of the person who had saved her, she understood if he couldn’t speak right now. Or if he wouldn’t want to say it at all. Lucy studied his black robes with her gaze and recognised the symbol of the College of Winterhold through the dirt and blood. The mage noticed her long stare, and so she looked away.

”I... I’m Natsu”, he said then, so quiet Lucy couldn’t almost hear. She turned towards him again and tried her hardest to smile, smile as she had been told to, but she couldn’t. She just looked at him and let the tears pour down. Freedom had once been all she had longed for, and now she had nothing left but freedom. And as her previous life was gone, she was free to choose a new one.

Despite feeling she could never move on, and how the cold forest floor would become her new home, she had to force herself forward. Lucy couldn’t let this chance pass by her. She gathered up her courage knowing her parents wouldn’t stop her now. She glanced at the sigil of the College once more, and then raised her gaze to meet the mage’s.

”Could… Could I come with you… to… to the College?” Lucy whispered, ready to draw it back if the mage would refuse. But instead of refusing, he judged her in silence, and Lucy just hoped he would see the remnants of magic in her if there was any. ”I… I have no place to go to...”

Lucy was giving up when he finally said, ”I... I had you f-figured for a… a mage.” Something faintly resembling a smile flashed on his face before it was gone, but it was enough to spark hope in the ruins of Lucy’s heart.

Maybe something new would rise from the ashes of her old life, for the end was always also a beginning.

* * *

**A/N: The Map of Skyrim. Helgen, the story's starting location is in the south.**

Dragon attacking Helgen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, thank you for reading my story! I hope you liked the first chapter, give a kudos or a comment if you did! <3


	2. EMBERSHARD

Never would've Natsu guessed the consequences of that quest. It wasn't supposed to be anything too serious, so how could've he known he'd end up laying his head on a block?

He and his best friend, a Dark Elf named Igneel had accepted a controversial job, again. They had been passing through Shor's Stone when a farmer came to them seeking help. He had found out his wife had an affair with a blacksmith and believed the travelling mages could teach that man a lesson. All they had to do was frighten the blacksmith and tell him to keep his filthy hands off other men's wives. Simple as that.

But as a necromancer, Igneel had got a terrifying idea: he'd resurrect a Draugr and lead it to the blacksmith's door at night. However, choosing a Draugr Overlord for the job had been a big mistake. Fatal mistake.

Everything had gone according to the plan until the blacksmith grabbed his greatsword and fought back. Igneel had lost control over the Draugr and it started attacking everyone in the village. Natsu had cannoned fireballs towards it, but the bastard didn't die so easily. Well, it was already dead. Eventually half of the village was on fire, and the Imperial soldiers caught them red-handed. 

It hadn't been the first time something like that happened. They were known as ’ _brothers of disaster_ ’ among the College, always causing trouble whenever they went. They had hauled a good amount of bounty over their heads. A single glance at their criminal records was enough for the soldiers to sentence them to die: Igneel for attempted murder and necromancy, Natsu for arson. Several arsons to be exact. 

’ _Mages like you are too dangerous to be left alive_ ’, they had said. But killing only _one_ of them had been their greatest mistake.

And now, everything was a blur. Black, endless blur. 

When twilight fell to the forest, Natsu was still shivering from shock. His toes and fingers were freezing, but he didn’t dare to build a campfire. Not yet. The black dragon had recently soared over them and flown north, but it didn't mean it was gone. It had to be lurking somewhere in the mountains, meaning it wasn't safe to move before the dark. 

The blonde girl in a torn, yellow dress sat next to him, legs brought to her chest, resting her head into her knees. She was still sobbing. Natsu had tried to ignore it, tried to shush when she got too loud, but nothing seemed to work. He couldn’t stand to hear women crying. It made him feel so helpless, while most of his energy went on trying not to cry himself. The image of Igneel’s head rolling down the plaza was still burning behind his eyes.

He couldn’t believe Igneel was no longer in this world. He had witnessed it with his very own eyes, and yet his mind still tried to deny it. As if it had been only a nightmare he’d soon wake up, but minutes and hours passed on and he did not wake. 

Some nightmares couldn’t be awaken from, for they were real.

Natsu held his hands over his head, covering his ears. He wanted to scream his lungs out, but all he could do was hold it back, even though his insides twisted from grief. Sparks of anger appeared on his palms, ready to set the whole world on fire as a funeral pyre Igneel deserved.

”C-could you… could you just… shut up”, he muttered to the girl, failing not to sound rude. ”W-wailing won’t bring your… your parents back, but the… the dragon, it’s still...”

The girl lifted her head from her knees, giving him a murderous glare. Her brown eyes were bloodshot and swollen, glistening as she wept. She sunk her fingers into the cold moss underneath her as her body tensed when he spoke. 

”Just… stop crying”, Natsu told as the girl kept staring at her. He didn’t know how to comfort her and didn’t even want to. He only wanted her to keep quiet before his head would explode. ”I’m sick of… listening to… that.”

”Y-you cried too”, she retorted, her trembling voice filling with waking anger. ”When… When they chopped your friend’s head off, you cried… too.”

Natsu shook his head, feeling a strike in his heart. ”I didn’t –”

”My father…", she started and took a deep, shivering breath. "He said a man should face his death with… with courage instead of… wailing like a milk-drinker.”

Natsu silenced. The girl had seen his tears, and he despised himself for that. Igneel had always called him a crybaby because he cried too often, at things too small. In time Natsu had hardened his heart to survive the harsh world, but the death of his best friend was just too much. And if the girl wasn’t there, he’d still be crying.

"Damn you, Nord girl", he muttered at himself, the stutter from his speech clearing up when he spoke quietly enough. Their conversation wasn’t going anywhere, it helped to distract him from his pain. 

It surprised him when the girl spoke again. "M-my name is Lucy, not a Nord Girl”, she whispered through the tears, catching Natsu’s attention.  
  
"Luigi?"

"Lucy!" she hissed.

Natsu nodded slowly. It was a rare name for a Nord, but she certainly was one. Her fair skin and hair left no room for doubt. He didn't know who she had been before this happened, but she didn't represent Natsu's image about Nords. Being a Breton himself, he knew them as hot-blooded warriors, but Lucy wasn't anything like that.

He had once brawled with a Nord called Erza, a fierce shieldmaiden from the Companions, and even remembering it now made his broken bones ache. And Gray, an ice wizard from the College was a Nord, and Natsu couldn't stand being in the same room with him. They were always fighting. Natsu did not discriminate, but he had a bad feeling about being stuck with another Nord. Especially now.

But maybe she would be different. 

”Well, Lucy”, he started, daring to speak a bit louder than before. ”W-we have to sit in this cold, mossy s-shithole until it gets dark, so try to… cheer up. It’s really… like, getting on my… head, so can we… talk, about something?”

Natsu was sure by then that the dragon wouldn’t come for them. If it hadn’t heard Lucy’s weeping, it wouldn’t hear them speaking. And the longer he’d sit in silence, the more excruciating his grief would grow. He had to let his thoughts out somehow before his head would explode like a fireball.

”Why… Why were you there?” she asked, causing him to turn his gaze at her. ”Why… were you sentenced to die?” 

Natsu swallowed in confusion, memories flooding into his mind. Silently he cursed at himself for having such a precise memory. 

”For burning the half of the Shor’s Stone”, he answered bluntly, and the girl’s eyes widened. ”W-why looking at me like that? What did you think I did? Killed a chicken in Riverwood or something?” 

”So you’re really a criminal”, she mumbled, sounding terrified. ”Great... so now I’m stuck in this cold s-shithole with a... pyromancer.”

Natsu’s eyes narrowed. He didn’t think of himself as a criminal. He always did what he thought was truly right, even if it meant breaking some laws along the way. Still, there was no denying he caused some unnecessary destruction every now and then. Fire was like that, uncontrollable and wild. Just like him. 

”Listen here, I’m not a bad guy. Believe me”, Natsu assured, trying to see it from her perspective. She had lost everything, she was scared. She wouldn’t feel safe with someone she thought to be a criminal. ”It was an accident. The Shor’s Stone thing. It’s the Imperials you should... be afraid of. The bastards killed my best friend and enjoyed it, I fucking saw it in their eyes.”

”I’ve seen it too”, Lucy answered with a shaky breath. ”I know the real face of the Empire.”

Trembling, Natsu nodded. He hadn’t cared about the civil war until now. He hadn’t cared who would rule the country until now. But after this day he saw everything in a different light. 

”If the dragon hadn’t burned them, I would’ve", he mumbled into his cold hands. "Damn insane fucks. Shit, I think I’ll have to join the Stormcloaks now, to show them not to mess with mages. Yes, that would do it. It would avenge Igneel’s death... Killing all of them to the last man...” 

The girl stared at him in silence, letting him mumble out his anger. Those were only words, but they made him feel better. Stronger, at least. He'd rather be angry than sad. 

”Why’d you save me?" the girl asked suddenly, stopping his cursing. "You... You didn’t have to. You could’ve just... escaped, and left me to die. Why risk your life... for me?” 

Natsu fell silent for a moment. He hadn’t thought about it at all for his actions had been driven by survival instinct. How could've he known the girl would want to stay with him after escaping the burning city? 

”I saw you on the porch, looking like… like you didn’t belong there”, Natsu answered, recalling the morning which seemed like a lifetime ago. ”And when you were still alive I thought I’d… help you out.”

Lucy's confused gaze stayed on him for a while. A hint of gratitude lingered in her eyes.

”So... what are we going to do now?” she asked then. ”Should we go to Whiterun? It’s near, has strong walls and a lot of soldiers. If the dragon comes back.”

Natsu scoffed. ”You’d really take a death row prisoner to Whiterun? It’s... It's not like the dragon made my sentence go away.” 

”Any... other ideas? We're freezing to death here.”

Natsu thought for a moment. He didn’t know the area well, but they had to find shelter soon. The Imperials had taken his weapons and coins, and the girl didn’t have anything with her. She wouldn’t survive in a torn dress. They had to find some equipment, and one place came to Natsu’s mind.

”There’s a run-down mine nearby. Embershard.”

Puzzled, Lucy raised her brow. ”Isn’t it full of bandits?”

”Nothing I can’t handle", Natsu assured. "Let’s smoke them out, take their stuff, stay there overnight and leave at dawn.”

”Sounds... dangerous."

As Lucy lowered her eyes to the ground, Natsu understood she didn't buy his plan. But it was the only option they got. If they'd wander aimlessly in the dark forest, they'd end up dead. And despite losing his best friend, Natsu didn't want to die. No matter how horrible it felt, he couldn't give up now. 

Igneel wouldn't want that. 

”Bandits are nothing compared to what we just survived", Natsu said. "It’ll soon be dark enough to move safely. We just... hold on a little while.”

Lucy stared at him for a moment, but then she nodded hesitantly. "Okay", she whispered, causing a stone roll from Natsu's shoulders. He was glad she accepted it. He didn't want to leave her alone either. She wouldn't survive on her own. 

”You’d... still like to talk about... something?” he asked then, but Lucy turned her eyes away and shook her head. He accepted that, too. At least she wasn’t crying anymore. 

Silence was good enough. 

* * *

By the time the night fell, Lucy's whole body ached from crouching under the pines. A wolf howled in the distance; a clear sign that their hiding place wasn't safe anymore, but Lucy waited for the mage to make the first move. She trusted he’d know better when to get going. 

While they sat there in silence, Lucy’s heart grew cold and numb along with her fingers. The sharpest shock wore off as everything became cloudy, like mist enveloping the forest in the autumn morning. It all seemed like a bizarre dream: the dragon attacking the city, her parents burning alive, escaping through the flames... such things couldn’t really happen. It all had to be just a dream. 

Strange calmness filled her mind as she lulled into that belief. It all was just a dream. Perhaps she had run away from home and crossed paths with this travelling mage who would take her to the College. Almost like she had always imagined.

Whenever something is too difficult, too horrible for the human mind to entertain, it’ll be rejected. Drawn to the back of one’s mind, but the imprint will always be there. 

”We should get moving now”, the mage whispered, interrupting the trail of Lucy’s thoughts. Brought back to the present moment in the cold, dark forest, Lucy let her gaze meet the mage’s as she nodded. 

Following his example, Lucy rose up and stretched her limbs. She wiped moss and spruce needles from her dress, noticing how badly it had torn. It had once reached her ankles but now it barely covered her knees. Scratches filled her bare shins but she couldn’t feel any pain. 

She couldn’t feel anything, really.

The mage started heading into direction opposite from where they had come. There weren’t any paths on the forest floor to follow, but Lucy hoped he knew where to go. She hadn’t been outside Helgen’s wall at night, and couldn’t navigate in the darkness. The mage fumbled forward for a while before glimpsing a clearing, which turned out to be a road. 

The road from Helgen to Riverwood, one Lucy had walked many times. 

As she stepped out of the forest after the mage, Lucy raised her eyes to the sky. Thousands and thousands of stars sparkled against the black velvet, accompanied with the two moons, Masser and Secunda. The sight brought comfort to Lucy. A familiar road with a familiar night sky. 

Lucy caught the mage staring at the silhouette of the Bleak Falls Barrow, contrasting against the night sky, on the other side of a river. He had stopped, his brow furrowing as if he was deep in thought. Moonlight shone on his face, letting Lucy study his features for a moment. Especially his large, dark eyes caught her attention, a magical mystery unravelled behind his gaze. 

”Embershard mine is somewhere here”, he said, voice shaking. His teeth rattled against each other as he trembled restlessly to keep warm. ”I-I remember those ruins.”

Lucy didn’t answer as he pulled a hood over his head and disappeared into the night with his dark robes. Quickly, she followed him. She didn’t want to get lost in the dark woods alone. The mage left the road again and walked into the forest, heading towards the rock face near them.

She had a vague idea of where the mine was supposed to be. She had passed by many times on her way to Riverwood, but never at night. Her father had said it was a dangerous place overrun by outlaws. She would’ve been afraid to go there before, but now nothing seemed to scare her. If the worst imaginable thing had already happened to her, what could a few bandits do? Nothing. 

Torchlight glowed in the middle of the forest, fluttering against the pines. The mage slowed down to silence the cracking sticks and rustling leaves beneath his feet. A shadow moved on the ground as someone kept a guard at the mine’s entrance. 

The mage didn’t give any warning as purple light appeared on his palm. Lucy’s eyed widened as he shot it forward, summoning a portal where a flaming creature passed through. In the shape of a demonic woman, a flame atronach appeared right in front of the mine. Lucy heard a scream, followed by running steps as the guard ran away. 

Lucy turned to the mage as he chuckled quietly. "So you're a pyromancer and a conjurer?" she asked.

The flame atronach got bored of chasing the bandit and floated closer to them. Lucy flinched as she felt its heat on her skin, and stared at it in awe. She had never seen a Daedra before. It was beautiful and terrifying. 

”Not really”, the mage answered. He closed the portal with a swift move of a hand and the creature disappeared. ”I focus on fire-based destruction magic, but I conjure flame atronachs sometimes. They’re... helpful.”

Lucy looked at him, trying to recall his name. He had said it, but Lucy’s mind couldn’t hold onto it. She could only remember him telling how he burned half of the Shor’s Stone. It had made her nervous at first, but it didn’t bother her anymore. He had said he wasn’t a bad guy, and Lucy wanted to believe that.

She didn’t really have any other choices than to believe that. 

”I’d like... to learn conjuration”, Lucy whispered abruptly while staring at him. ”My great-grandmother Anna was a conjurer. She was one of the best.” 

”Really? That’s...” he said, looking down to avoid her eyes. ”I don’t know many Nord conjurers, but if she was good, then you might have some talent. Good luck with that.”

His tone wasn’t mocking, but not supportive either. Lucy deemed he was still in shock and couldn’t find anything proper to say. So was she. Mumbling about her great-grandmother to a perfect stranger? It had been a secret she shouldn’t have spilt.

Every time she had talked with a mage, her parents had been nearby, but now they were gone. She could talk about magic to her heart’s content. Her words were still shaky, her mind in a blur, but magic had always been her biggest dream. It managed to pierce through the haze and grab Lucy’s hand before she’d fall.

”Do you know any other magic?” Lucy asked, curiosity seeping through her. The mage furrowed his brow, surprised by her sudden chattiness. 

”Some restoration spells”, he answered with a one-sided shrug. ”Healing, you know. It’s useful. And I can conjure a dagger. I used to have a glass dagger with me, but the bastards took it.”

Lucy nodded. She had read a little about the different schools of magic, but she lacked any hands-on experience about them. Seeing him casting those fireballs had been the first time she saw anyone using magic. He appeared skilled to her, to the point of envy. 

”Anyway, we should carry on”, the mage said, gesturing towards the mine. ”There’s probably more bandits there, but I’ll smoke them out. Let’s not waste energy in an unnecessary battle.”

The mage walked to the mine’s door and left it open as he stepped in. Lucy stood still for a moment, hesitating whether she should follow him or not. She could just turn back and run into Riverwood where it would be safe. There was always use for an extra pair of hands in the Riverwood Trader.

But, shaking her head, Lucy decided not to need safety anymore. Safety had become her cage, strangling her like chains. 

She chose freedom.

Warmth surged into her freezing bones as she stepped into the mine. The air smelled of moist earth and strong ale, and torches fluttered on the walls of the tunnel. Lucy could only see a shadow of the mage as he had hurried forward. She walked after him, trying hard to memorise his name. She didn’t want to ask it again. 

Lucy reached the mage at the entrance of a greater chamber. Crouching where the tunnel ended, he collected some moss and mushrooms from the ground and prepared them in a ball. Lucy frowned, struggling to understand what he was doing. 

Then a single spark from the mage’s fingertip set the ball on fire, puffing a cloud of black smoke in the air. She heard chatter coming from below them, but didn’t dare to peek past the corner. 

"The idiots will think the mine is on fire and flee through the back end", he whispered grinning. He tossed the ball to the ground and took a few steps back. The murmur grew louder as the bandits smelled the smoke, but Lucy couldn’t separate the words. They sounded alert.

And by accident, Lucy couched as the smoke found its way into her lungs.  
  
_’Is someone there?’_

”Fuck”, the mage cursed silently as one of the bandits noticed him and picked up his axe. Lucy tried to apologise, but words got stuck in her throat. The mage stamped on the ball to put out the fire, exposing their hiding place at the same. 

Two rough-looking men revealed behind the smoke. The other one, a slim, red-haired man had a look in his eyes which evoked sickness in Lucy’s stomach. As if he was hungry, but not for food. For her.

”Tor, kill the boy while I catch the girl”, the bandit said to his friend. ”It has been a while since I’ve gotten a taste of a woman so pretty. Our lovely ladies look like filthy beasts.”

The mage raised his arm in front of Lucy to keep her back. She gasped as he enveloped his body in a cloak of flames before charging forward. He brought his hands together, casting a fireball between them and throwing it towards the bandit. The man screamed as it caught him, the force of the impact swaying him off his feet. 

The other bandit froze and stared the mage with a fearful gaze. Showing no mercy, he grabbed the man from the neck, pouring fire straight into his body. Lucy shrieked as she watched flames gnawing away his skin, the pink turning into charcoal black. Almost like a dragon, the mage let his fire burn his enemies alive.

The mage let go of the man. He fell lifelessly to the ground, his fur armour still flaming. The other bandit rose up behind the mage, his shaking fingers clutched to the handle of his axe.

”Son of a -”

He couldn’t finish his curse, for the mage turned around with another fireball readied in his hands. With full force, he tossed it at him, sending him flying to the back end of the chamber. Lucy could hear only a painful crack and distant groaning as the man hit to the ground.

And as he rose no more, Lucy knew he was dead. 

Flames surrounding the mage dissolved. He wiped his forehead and glanced at Lucy. In an utter loss of words, she just stared at him, trembling. 

He had said he wasn’t a criminal, but here he was with two dead bodies on his account.

”You... You said you wouldn’t kill them”, Lucy mumbled, lowering her gaze from the mage’s dark eyes to the corpse by his feet. ”You said you would smoke them out, not... kill them...”

The mage crouched by the body and lit the remains on fire. The smell of burning human flesh filled the chamber like it had filled the streets of Helgen. Lucy shook her head as tears welled up in her eyes, tears she thought she had already run out of.

”Well, I tried”, he answered and moved to the second corpse, to cremate it as well. ”I tried not to fight them. Trust me, I don’t kill unless I have to. These are outlaws, living by the rule kill or be killed. There no other choice than to live by that as well when meeting them.”

”We could have asked them -”

”Ask them what?” he wondered, stepping away from the burning body. ”Should we have been like, ’ _hey, sorry, would you please be so kind and let us stay in your mine for a night? And you'd be so kind you wouldn't rape our fucking arses and slaughter us while we sleep_?' It doesn't work like that with these people. These were the real criminals, not me.”

Lucy admitted in silence. He was right. The bandits would have killed him, captured her and... she didn’t even want to think about it. Whatever it would’ve been, this was better than that. Even though it felt so wrong in Lucy’s heart. He had saved her at the cost of two lives, yet she struggled to feel gratitude about it. Only shock. 

”Okay”, she let out a long sigh. ”Is there... anyone else?”

The mage looked around, listening closely for any noises, but there was only silence. Lucy walked closer to him. It seemed they were alone now, but Lucy knew they shouldn’t lower their guard yet. They shouldn’t lower their guard ever again. 

”So... you still want to come with me to Winterhold?” the mage asked suddenly.

Lucy’s eyes shot at him. His question was sincere, a hint of guilt seeping through his words. Lucy looked him into the eyes, comparing his gaze to the way the bandit had glared at her. There wasn’t that kind of evil or malice in his eyes. There wasn’t any kind of evil at all. 

”Yes”, Lucy answered. ”I want to.” 

He nodded as an answer and turned away, heading to the fireplace the bandits had built. 

”Hey, there’s a kettle full of meat stew!” he exclaimed, joy sparkling in his voice for the first time today. ”Are hungry? Because I am starving!”

A hint of a smile twitched on Lucy's lips. And suddenly, right then, Lucy remembered his name. 

He was Natsu. 

From now on to forever his name would mean freedom to her. Vast, inviting, but terrifying freedom.

* * *

**A/N: The forest they're hiding at and the mine's entrance.**


	3. UNBROKEN ROAD

No matter how empty her stomach was, Lucy couldn’t force herself to eat that stew.

Natsu had called it meat stew but it hadn’t even seen meat. It was made from stale carrots, potatoes, onions and something so disgusting Lucy didn’t want to know what it was. With widened eyes, she stared as the mage devoured the fourth bowl and begun to fill the fifth.

”This shit is delicious”, he mumbled as he tossed the bowl away and drank directly from the kettle. _Shit_ was indeed an appropriate word to describe it. Crunching her nose, Lucy turned away to avoid vomiting. ”Are you sure you’re not hungry?”

”I’m not hungry”, Lucy repeated once again. Part a lie, she placed her hand on her belly to muffle the growing ache. She had last eaten in the morning, but her appetite was gone. The smell of burned flesh didn’t help it return.

”Can I have the rest?”

”Yes.”

”Thanks, Luigi.”

 _It's Lucy_ , she mumbled to herself and stood up. Exhaustion made her body heavy as iron, but restlessness forced her to move. Shivering, she looked around the mine. Water rippled beneath an uncrossed bridge which led to the other half of the mine. Torchlight gleamed there in silence, making Lucy’s mind alert. Could it be true there were only two bandits in this mine?

Lucy glanced down. Two small axes lied on the ground, abandoned and lonely. As a test, she took one of them into her hands. The weight of the weapon surprised her. Rusty drops stained the steel, and Lucy knew it wasn’t just rust. What kinds of horrible things had this ax done? Holding such a vessel for death felt surreal.

Everything felt surreal.

Her face reflected from the dusty steel. She flinched at the sight. Her skin had lost all colour and her hair was messy like a bird’s nest. Charcoal and ash painted marks on her cheeks and forehead, covering the bloody scratches. She’d never seen herself in a shape like that. Mother had always made sure she appeared washed and tidy. Even when she’d played outside as a child she wouldn’t let herself get dirty.

Throwing her mind in another turmoil, Lucy looked away to forget her shabby appearance. The mage was still eating and didn’t notice her at all, fully focusing on his meal. He probably hadn’t eaten anything while imprisoned. Deciding he’d be okay on his own, Lucy walked to the bridge.

Lucy placed her foot on the wood. It seemed strong enough to carry her to the other side, but she hesitated. Was it safe to explore the mind on her own? Was it utterly stupid and risky? Through the clouds in her mind, Lucy’s intuition pointed her towards the end of the bridge. Not knowing why, she just had to go and check it. She couldn’t stay still either.

Quietly, she crossed the bridge as her heart began to race in her chest. Her fingers gripped around the weapon’s handle as she proceeded into the tunnel. There were chambers like prison cells, one of them significantly larger than the others. Filled with barrels, chests and weapon stands, it had to be a storage.

Lucy peeked behind the corner. Air got stuck in her throat as it tightened like a rope, her legs freezing in place. A woman sat on a chair in front of the storage chamber, holding the hilt of a greatsword. Her eyes were closed; was she asleep? Several battle scars ran over her face and her dark hair had been shaved from the sides. The tribal patterns painted to her scalp informed of her high rank, but her horned helmet rested on the backrest of the chair.

 _"Hey Luigi, where did you go?"_ the mage's voice echoed from a distance.

Mumbling a silent curse, Lucy hid behind the wall. She squeezed herself into the shadows as the bandit awakened.

"Who's there?" the woman wondered, alert and sharp as if she hadn't been sleeping at all. Lucy pressed herself against the stone, raising the axe in front of her face. The bandit's shadow moved on the edges of the tunnel and the greatsword clattered on the rocky floor as she lifted it up.

The bandit circled in front of her and Lucy pinched her eyes closed. Not knowing what to do, Lucy swung the axe forward with all of her strength. A putrid, wet _thud. H_ ot fluid splattered on her face. Her grip loosened around the handle and a body thumped to the ground.

Lucy screamed when she opened her eyes.

"Are you okay, Luigi?" Natsu asked as he arrived. "I heard a scream."

The mage lowered his gaze to the woman lying on the floor with an axe poking out from the middle of her forehead. Hyperventilating, Lucy held her hands over her mouth and tears washed away the blood on her face.

"My name is Lucy, you idiot!" she shrieked. "Is she... is she dead?"

A crimson pool spread beneath the body. The armoured chest rose no more. Natsu stared at the macabre sight and lifted his brows. ”I think she is”, he stated calmly.

Lucy fell on her knees. ”Gods, did I just... kill someone? Oh, oh no, no...”

Her stomach cramped and soon she vomited on all fours. She could never bring herself to kill anyone, not in a world. I had to be a bad dream, there was no way it could be true. Soon she would wake up in the warmth of her own bed, glad it had been just a nightmare, and never wish for an adventure again. _Soon._

"You'll get used to it", the mage said, crouching by the corpse. Natsu took the keys from her belt, walked to the storage chamber's gate and tested them on the lock. Old metal creaked as it opened. "Do you wanna loot this room?"

Lucy wiped stomach acid from her face. How could he be so damn calm? Why wasn’t he shocked, or did he just conceal it so well?

"I... I want to go home", she sobbed. She moved to her knees, peeking at the dead body over her shoulder, and felt like throwing up again.

"A dragon burned your home to the ground", Natsu reminded and disappeared into the chamber. "I wouldn't go home if I was you."

She shook her head. "But I... I k-killed her! I’ve... I’m a monster..."

"You think killing an outlaw who would have killed you makes you a monster?" he answered with a dry chuckle. "We aren't inside Helgen's walls anymore, girl. Welcome to the wilds."

She would’ve slapped him if he hadn’t been right. The bandit would’ve killed her, but she killed her first. Her vision of the world had been so naive, and she only realised that now. The world was a harsh, cold place where only the strong survived. She had to learn that if she wanted to live.

She had been stronger than the woman with an axe stuck to her skull. _Kill or be killed,_ they said.

* * *

Lucy’s tears ran out soon, but the trembling didn’t cease. Lucy asked the mage to burn the bandit's corpse as well. The face of that woman would be forever imprinted in her mind as the first life she took away. As the evidence of the bloodshed turned into a pile of ashes, Lucy managed to shut it out and keep going on.

In order to survive, Lucy needed equipment. The mage had explained what she needed and why, but her ears had filtered most of it away. She had just stood in the corner of the storage chamber and blankly stared at the wall. The events of the morning were still replaying in her vision, but slowly they started to fade to black.

"I think this leather armour would suit you", Natsu said while going through one of the chests, catching Lucy’s attention. "I know you'd like to wear mage's robes, but until you learn how to defend yourself, you should keep some armour on."

The mage tossed a set of hard-boiled leather to Lucy, and she picked them up hesitantly. Despite being ugly, old and worn, they'd serve her better than her torn dress. "Try it on", the mage insisted.

Lucy frowned, clutching her fingers into the leather. "I’d... I’d like some privacy."

Natsu glanced at her in confusion and then continued digging the bandit's stuff like he hadn't even heard. Lucy sighed and turned around. He hadn’t understood what she meant. She didn’t want to change clothes around a man she’d just met, but she had no other choices. She didn’t want to go out there alone either.

"No peeking, then", she sighed quietly and slipped out from her dress. She loosened the strings on the leather armour and began to dress into it, wondering which part went where. She hadn't known armours were so complicated.

"Look, an orcish dagger!" Natsu exclaimed joyfully and showed the blade to her, fully oblivious to her half-naked state. Lucy shrieked and covered herself with her arms.

"I said no peeking!" she cried out, cheeks flaring up.

"Don't worry, this chest is the only one I'm interested in. There's some gold -"

"Look away, idiot!"

"Okay, okay. But that armour is the wrong side out, by the way."

Painfully aware of her burning red cheeks, Lucy turned the leather around and suddenly it got much easier to dress into. Natsu tossed her a pair of bracers and hide shoes as well. When she was ready, she looked like a bandit herself. Mother would have scolded her if she saw her now.

The leather didn't restrain her movements, but it felt stiff and hard like it hadn't been worn in years. Stretching a bit, she tested her new trajectories and walked to the bookshelf. She took the first book into her hands and frowned.

" _The Lusty Argonian Maid_?" she cringed and put the book back.

Natsu closed the chest, having found everything he looked for. He had hauled a dagger, a new pair of boots and a small coin purse. Then, he opened one of the barrels and a sweet scent of fresh apples puffed to the air. Despite being hungry, Lucy didn't even notice. A peculiar book had caught her attention.

"There are some apples for you", the mage announced and picked up one. Lucy trailed her fingers on the book's purple cover. A Daedric letter had been carved into the leather. It was a spell tome. Lucy had never held one in her hands. The mage peeked over her shoulder to see what she had found.

"Which school of magic does this spell belong to?" Lucy asked in astonishment. Like a ray of light, the spellbook brought her a spark of joy she thought she’d lost forever.

Only magic could save her now.

"That's a conjuration book", Natsu answered. "Looks like Conjure Familiar to me. Pretty easy, but you should train with something easier first. It will take a long while before you can summon a wolf."

She nodded. There was an empty fur bag lying in the corner. Lucy picked it up and packed the tome in it. She took the apple from the mage’s hand, packing it too in case her appetite would ever return. Then she turned towards him again.

”Could you... Could you teach me?” she asked, voice meek and shy. The mage looked at her like he hadn’t heard properly, but then he lifted his shoulders.

”I'm not good at teaching”, he answered.

"It doesn't matter. I want to learn”, Lucy told with more confidence. ”How long will it take to travel from here to Winterhold?”

"I don't know. A few weeks or more by feet.”

”By feet? We could use that coin to hire a carriage.”

”We won’t”, Natsu said, suddenly becoming restless. ”It’s... It’s because I get sick in a cart. Very sick. I can’t stand it. So we’ll walk.”

Lucy raised her brows. "But they took you to Helgen in a cart and you were just fine."

"That was torture. I vomited blood just before reaching the city gates”, he said. ”And speaking of going to Winterhold, I'd prefer the mountain route, but with you, it might be safer to travel Whiterun's road instead, through the Valtheim Towers and there to Windhelm."

"Safer by how?" she wondered.

"Are you up to a horde of frost trolls and ice wraiths yet?" Natsu asked, and Lucy got quiet. "Yeah, I think so, too. Riverwood doesn't have soldiers, so we'll pass through there tomorrow morning, avoid Whiterun and soon we'll be in the Old Holds, far from the Imperials' reach."

"You would have gone through the Rift? Don't you have bounty there, for burning Shor's Stone?"

"The Imperials arrested me, not hold guards. But I wouldn't go through that village if I want to keep my head."

Lucy chuckled and noticed a hunting bow hanging on the wall. She admired it's curved shape for a moment before turning to the mage again.

"With that dragon roaming around, I think severing your head is the least of their concerns, to be honest."

"I wouldn't be so sure", he grinned. "But I think my head is gonna fall off my shoulders on its own if I don't get some sleep. I'm gonna go finish that meat stew and lay rest. Okay?"

She nodded. The mage stuffed his things into a leather bag and set off. Lucy kept eyeing the bow, imagining how it would feel in her hands, what it would feel like to draw an arrow and release it, and watch from the shadows as it hit the target's heart.

She answered the bow's call and grabbed it from the rack. It felt unquestionably better than an axe.

* * *

Lucy dreamt of dragons and arrows, and the moment her arrow finally hit the dragon's eye, the mage woke her up. By fiercely shaking her from the shoulders.  
Lucy's eyes snapped open. Natsu was frightened. He tore her out from the bedroll's warmth.

"Riverwood is _crowded_ with Imperial soldiers!" he cried out. "They've probably come to investigate the dragon attack, but there's no way we can pass through without getting caught. They know Ulfric escaped, and are surely after him as well. It's not safe here, we have to go, now!"

She didn't have time to answer. Natsu pulled her up, picked his own bag and ran over the wooden bridge. Hastily, Lucy grabbed the backpack, the bow and its quiver and followed him.

"Where are we going?" she shouted after him, trying not to tackle in her own legs.

"Through Helgen's ruins and to the mountain route. I know you're not ready for such a dangerous trip, but I'll try to keep you safe."

The uncertainty in his voice scared her. The morning sun shone at the tunnel's end and they arrived in the forest, a bit further from the main entrance. Lucy saw Riverwood from there, and Natsu had been right. She had never seen so many soldiers and guards in that peaceful village.

"This way, Lucy", Natsu whispered and moved quietly by the crag's edge. Lucy tried her best to stay hidden behind the bushes and trees – gladly the soldiers seemed to remain in the village, not going any further for now.

They reached the road. Lucy wiped morning dew from the surface of her leather suit and gazed uphills, into the distance. Only faint smoke rose from Helgen's ruins towards the clear sky.

Suddenly, a pack of wolves emerged from the forest a fair distance away from them, howling. Lucy grabbed her bow, even though she had absolutely no idea of experience how to use it.

"Wait", Natsu said, holding her still. "Someone's there."

A woman in plate steel armour followed the wolves and put them on her sword, one by one. Whimpers escaped the dying wolves as she struck them with no mercy. Bright red hair glowed in the sun, the same shade as the blood on her blade.

Natsu petrified at the sight.

"Kynareth save me", he panted. "That's Erza fucking Scarlet."

* * *

**A/N: the mine and the road where they meet Erza**


	4. FROM PAST TO PRESENT

The scarlet-haired, armoured woman wiped the blade clean into a grey wolf's fur. Natsu's heart beat like a drum of war, not from the happiness of the reunion, but from the terror. His palms broke in a cold sweat and instinctively he took a step back, then another.

"Where are you going, Natsu?" Lucy asked.

Natsu kept his eyes strictly on the warrior, fearing for his life that she'd notice him. "To Riverwood."

"But they'll arrest you."

"I'd rather be arrested by them than that beast", Natsu hissed and turned around. Lucy grabbed the neck of his robe, pulling him back. Her hold was surprisingly strong.

"Hey, you can't just run away -"

"Natsu of Dragonbridge, is that really you?" a fierce voice said from the distance. Shivers ran through Natsu's spine from the mere memory. "You're still alive? Honestly, I didn't expect I'd see you again."

"… fuck", the mage muttered and his face lost all colour when Lucy turned him over. The red-haired warrior walked down the hill with the sword on her hand, and Natsu's legs went weak. He hadn't been afraid of a dragon, but he was definitely afraid of _her_. She was truly a beast for a woman, more muscular than most men.

"What brings you here, fire wizard?" she asked. Natsu kept his head low to avoid her gaze. Lucy poked his side, urging him to answer.

"I… I was at Helgen…" he stuttered quietly, like a child being scolded by his mother.

"What were you doing at Helgen?"

"Being executed."

"Why am I not surprised?" she scoffed. "Should I arrest you and take you to the Jarl?"

Natsu's shivering fingers curled into fists.

"If you do, I swear on my dead mom I'll let them know about your little connections with the Dark Brotherhood!"

The warrior's dark eyes widened. "Okay, okay, just shut up about _that_. I won't arrest you."

"What the _hell_ is going on?" Lucy inquired in utter confusion, staring at them both.

"My name is Erza, and I fight for the Companions", the warrior introduced herself. The mage already knew her name. He'd never forget it.

"Oh, the Companions!" the blonde gasped. "I've heard so many tales about your glorious battles."

"And most of them are only tales. Mostly, we just drink mead in Jorrvaskar and brawl", Erza said. "Who are you, young lady?"

"She's Lucy", Natsu answered. "She's a tavern maiden from Helgen -"

"Let me introduce myself _by myself_ , idiot!" Lucy yelled at him and turned towards the Companion. "And I was a merchant, not a tavern girl. I'm going to the College of Winterhold with him, to become a mage."

"Winterhold is the other way around."

"We'll go through the mountains", Natsu said. "There aren't Imperials there."

"But there are trolls and bears and wolves. To take a maiden for such a dangerous trip -"

"If I get arrested, there's no way she'll make it to the College, or be able to join. We're going through the mountains and that's final. I can protect her."

"Can you? You can barely protect yourself."

Natsu grit his teeth. "I am a lot stronger than what I was two years ago. I was just a boy then."

"And you still are", Erza sighed. "But to your luck, I happen to be on my way to Kynesgrove. I'm going to investigate an ancient dragon burial site there, but first I'll visit Helgen's ruins. I can help you on your way."

"You're investigating the return of the dragons?" Lucy asked. "We were there when the dragon attacked."

"You were?"

"Yes. I lost my family."

"Then we should travel together. Your information might be crucial for my work. Not many survived from Helgen. You're the first ones I've heard about."

"An overgrown lizard attacked and burned the city to the ground, that's all we know", Natsu said. "We _won't_ travel together."

"You still haven't gotten over that you lost a brawl to me?" Erza scoffed. Natsu hadn't. His broken rib had never fully healed. "For your friend's sake, you should swallow your pride and come with me. The bears are going crazy this time of a year."

Natsu glanced at Lucy. Her eyes sparkled in excitement. She'd definitely want to travel with a Companion.

"Don't mind him, I can surely tell you everything I remember about the dragon if you help us", Lucy said.

"Every piece of information will be valuable to me. In return, I can help you through the mountains and teach you to defend yourself. No offence, but you don't look too comfortable with that bow."

There was no way to refuse now, Natsu knew.

"That would be amazing!" the blonde exclaimed. "It's true, I've never shot with a bow before, I'd be so happy if you'd teach me."

"Then it's settled", Erza said. "Are you coming or not, fire wizard?"

Natsu didn't want to, but the route was dangerous indeed. It would be smarter and safer to travel together. Natsu thought for a moment and decided to accept, for Lucy's sake.

"Fine", he sighed, pouting.

* * *

Natsu knew it wasn't easy for Lucy to return to Helgen, but she hid it spectacularly well. The girl who had cried helplessly for hours had changed into a woman who tried her best to be brave. She admired Erza and inspired by her valour. Keeping a proper distance to them, Natsu circled the edges of the city, not knowing what to do. To him, there was nothing worth investigating. A dragon had been there and that was all.

Natsu slid his hands into the pockets of his robes and kicked a stone. It rolled into smouldering cinders and cast a spark. The air smelled of smoke and burned flesh, and for the first time, Natsu failed to enjoy that. It wasn't easy for him to be there either, where a long road had ended and another had begun. The plaza and the block were right around the corner. The _damned_ block which had claimed Igneel's life, and ended a part of his.

Natsu sat down on a fallen roof and waited. His eyes wandered to the plaza again and again, no matter how he tried to focus on something else. He glanced at the blonde girl who examined the size of a dragon's footprint, then at the redhead and _shuddered._ Natsu bit his tongue. If even beauty failed to distract him, as it so often did, there was no other choice than to answer the block's call. As if Igneel wanted him to say goodbye. Natsu jumped down from the charred logs and slowly walked through the ruins, leaving his footprints on the ashes.

The autumn wind played with the mage's pink hair and swayed his robes as he stood alone in the middle of the empty square. An executioner's axe lied on the ground next to the block, glimmering in the midday's sun. His chest tightened as he arrived at the block and saw his own reflection on the weapon's surface. It had been so close to his neck he could almost feel the pain of it severing his head.

Natsu raised his eyes from the axe and saw a headless body dragged into the shade of a watchtower. Barely recognisable college robes had melted on the corpse which hadn't burned so well. The Dunmer were half-resistant to the fire, after all. Soon the crows would feast on the remains and Natsu's heart burst from both sorrow and hate. Igneel deserved better than to be stripped from all dignity and left to rot. Natsu looked around, trying to find the missing part of his friend. In the furthest corner of the plaza, there was a ball in the size of a head.

Only the elven ears confirmed him the head had belonged to Igneel. The familiar face and coal-black hair were gone. With tears welling up in his eyes, Natsu picked the head up and carried it to the body. Gently, he placed it back on Igneel's shoulders and wiped his eyes. Igneel wouldn't want him to cry. Igneel wanted him to carry on.

"Azura's wisdom to you, my friend." Natsu summoned a spark and set his friend on fire. He intensified the flames until the pyre was hot enough to cremate the remains of a Dark Elf. Though they weren't related by blood, Natsu had always looked up to him as an older brother, as a replacement for the one he had lost.

As the smoke went up, Natsu turned around and picked the bloody axe and struck it to the wooden block with all of his force. The steel felt heavy in his hands, unfamiliar as he was to weapons forged from metal instead of magic. Grunting, he pulled it back and swung it again, and again, and again, until nothing but smithereens remained of the wood. He stopped as he felt eyes on him. Natsu lifted his head and met the blonde girl's wondering gaze. He tossed the axe to the ground, waiting for Lucy to ask _what the hell are you doing_ , but she didn't.

Maybe she understood.

* * *

The only things worth a notice they found were the dragon's footsteps. Those were a lot larger than any of the ancient fossils. Lucy's memories of yesterday were scarce, but she'd remember the size of that thing forever. It had been gigantic, and as black as the night.

Lucy halted by her former home and stared into the ruins. The porch her parents had died at had been burned to ashes, and so had they. Lucy found that oddly consoling. They were gone now, in an abstract sense, somewhere across the stars. Heart found hope when the eyes saw no evidence of death, it seemed. For Natsu, there had been evidence, and very little hope.

The mage, having recovered from his tantrum, stopped next to her while Erza collected ash into tiny bottles.

"So you worked in this store?" he asked, gazing at the demolition.

Lucy nodded, feeling a lump in her throat.

"My parents owned it", she explained. "My family had owned it for generations. I had no siblings, and so it would have passed down to me."

"Let me guess, you've wanted to leave this city for years and join the College, but your parents didn't let you?"

Lucy looked down and sighed. "Exactly. And I feel horrible that my prayers came true this way."

Natsu was silent for a while.

"My dad was so furious when I wanted to go to the College", Natsu said then. "I was thirteen, and my mother had just died. My older brother left for the College when I was a kid. He sent us letters every month for five years, but they suddenly stopped. There wasn't a word of him in a year. Mom died of heartbreak and worry. For her sake, I wanted to go find out what happened to my brother. Dad wouldn't let me, but I left anyway."

"He probably didn't want to lose you too", Lucy answered. It surprised her to hear him opening up. "Did you find your brother?"

The mage shook his head. "He had been missing for a year when I went to the College. And he's still missing."

"Maybe you'll find him someday."

"I don't want to", he said. "I have other things to do. Like avenging the death of a man who was more a brother to me than my own flesh and blood ever was."

"By destroying the execution block?"

"Gotta start somewhere."

Seeking for vengeance was a part of grieving, but Lucy didn't have that. She couldn't even hope to avenge the death of her parents - killing a dragon was a completely ruled out option. She focused on building a new life instead of dwelling in the past. Vengeance wouldn't bring back the dead, but Lucy didn't want to say that to the mage. He'd learn it by himself over time. It wasn't up to her to teach him.

"Where are you from, Natsu?" Lucy asked, trying to change the subject. "Is your father still alive?"

"From a small farmhouse near Dragonbridge, where my dad still lives with his dogs unless he has finally died of rockjoint", he answered. "But the College is my home now, and the mages are my family. As it will be yours."

Lucy smiled shyly and looked away. The Companion arrived with her ash samples.

"It's time to go", Erza said. "We should check the keep before we leave. You need fur cloaks if you want to survive through the mountains."

Natsu gazed at the redhead with fierce repulsion and fear in his eyes.

"Are you going to tell me what happened between you two?" Lucy whispered to him as Erza left for the city keep. "I'd like to hear that story."

"You _don't._ "

"Why? She's so friendly and warm."

"Ask that from my poor broken rib bones", Natsu scoffed. "They still hurt when I see her."

"She broke your heart?"

"No, no. Goodness, no! Only my bones."

Lucy chuckled.

"What was that talk about the Dark Brotherhood?"

"Well, you didn't hear this from me, but she's engaged with a member of the Brotherhood."

"Really?"

Natsu didn't have time for an answer.

"Are you coming or not?" the warrior hollered at the keep's door. Without continuing the conversation any further, they followed her.

* * *

Some parts of the keep had miraculously survived the attack. From the city guard's quarters, they found everything they needed to equip them for the journey. Lucy gathered every arrow she could carry. She found a fitting fur cloak and a bedroll for herself – Erza had promised there was enough room for three people in her tent. However, Lucy presumed Natsu would rather sleep in the cold outside than near _that beast_ , as the mage called her.

The day was still bright and young when they headed to the east. Sunlight filtered through mighty pines and ancient spruces framing the road of cobbled stone, which led up to the mountain. Lucy felt unsafe when the ruins left behind. When she had been a child playing in the forest with her friends, she had never lost sight of the city walls. Father told her that a group of hagravens lived at Orphan Rock and hunted the children who wandered too far from Helgen. She had believed.

"So, you have never used a bow before?" Erza asked her.

"Never."

"My shield-sister Aela is an excellent huntress", she said. "She always says that composure is the key to a successful archer. If you can remain calm, even in the midst of chaos, your arrow will most likely find its target. That's where you should start."

Lucy had much to learn. Back in the mine, she had panicked, and survived by pure luck. With a bow, there was no room for panic. Arrows wouldn't fly from trembling hands.

"Should I try now?" Lucy asked. "To hit that tree or something."

"Why not. The road is empty and calm. It will be harder to train up in the mountains. The cold will make you shaky. Take the bow and I'll show you the basics."

Lucy released the bow from the straps on her back and pulled an arrow from the quiver. The iron arrow felt so fragile in her hands, and she wondered how that would ever kill anything.

"Are we really stopping now?" Natsu sighed loudly, having walked far ahead of them. "I'm going to be bored to death."

"At least your death sentence would take care of itself, saving the headman from the trouble", Erza replied. "It might even be less painful that way."

"But too damn slow."

"We'll take a few shots and then we'll carry on", Lucy said. "You do whatever you want while I train."

Natsu rolled his eyes and summoned a fire atronach. A flaming, floating creature with a feminine figure evoked so much envy in Lucy. _If I could do that, too…_ Then, Natsu threw a firebolt at it, engaging the daedra into a playful fight.

"What are you doing that for?" Lucy shrieked.

"I'm training", the mage said as he dodged the atronach's fireball.

Erza sighed. "He hasn't changed at all", she whispered to Lucy. "Hey, don't set the entire forest on fire, alright?"

Natsu didn't seem to hear as he continued the fight with the atronach. Lucy placed the arrow's nock on the string and upon Erza's approval, she began to pull. The Imperial archers made it look so easy - she had to use all her strength to draw the string until it touched her cheek. She couldn't keep the string fully pulled back for more than a second, and then her fingers slipped and the arrow fell weakly to the ground. The string slapped her arm, and it _hurt_ , even though the bracers.

"First, you have to get your stance right", Erza helped. "Remember to keep it consistent. Use the same stance every time. It's the foundation of your shot."

Lucy picked up the fallen arrow, fixed her posture and placed her feet as the Companion guided.

"Just _how_ can you do this in the middle of a battle?" Lucy sighed.

"We've trained for years. You've trained for five minutes. Remember that. Now, nock another arrow and try again. Keep your anchor point the same every time as well. Your chin, cheek, corner of your mouth, whatever feels the best, but always keep it the same."

Lucy nodded, placed the arrow on the string and pulled it towards her jaw. The weight of the string didn't take her by the surprise this time, but it tired her arm all the same. The moment the nock touched her skin, she released her hold. And as Natsu dodged the arrow and gave her an annoyed look, Lucy realised she had forgotten to aim.

 _"Damn it"_ , she cursed silently.

"It's okay. Keep your eyes on the target next time. A few more shots and then we'll carry on before that idiot sets something on fire."

"How did you two meet? He won't tell me."

"It was two years ago. He had been causing some trouble for someone, and my job was to rough him up to remind him how to behave. That's what the Companions do these days, beat people up when people don't bother to do it themselves."

"And he lost that fight?" Lucy asked. She barely heard anything from the explosions of Natsu's firebolts.

"Look at him. He's slight of build, not exactly made for a physical brawl. I found him in an inn at Windhelm, piss-drunk, and told I'd come to teach him a lesson. He was too drunk to fight properly, so he challenged me to another brawl when he'd sobered up, for a hundred gold. I admitted, for a true Nord never misses a chance to test her worth. I spent the night in the inn drinking with him, and we brawled again the next day. He was left with broken bones and a hundred gold lighter pockets."

The mage rolled on the ground as the atronach's fireball hit him and the fire caught his robes. Lucy couldn't help but laugh.

"That's how an old Nord wisdom goes", Lucy chuckled. "You don't know a woman 'til you've had a strong drink and a fistfight with her."

"That's true. He was a chatty one that night. He told me all about his adventures and the crazy things he had done. It didn't surprise me that someone hired muscle to beat him up."

Judging from what Natsu had told her, Erza had probably told him a thing or two about herself as well. Lucy notched another arrow and drew back, keeping her eye precisely on the tree. When she was about to release, she heard a low, loud growl. She flinched, loosening her hold as a full-grown black bear stood upright behind the bushes.

"Sorry!" the fire wizard shouted. "I pissed off a bear!"

* * *

**A/N: the ruins of Helgen and the beginning of the mountain road**


	5. AROUND THE FIRE

Everything Father had taught her about bear encounters fled her mind.

The bear popped its jaws and swatted the ground with its paw, blowing and snorting. Instinctively, Lucy hid behind Erza's back and stared the black creature eye to eye. Lucy held her breath and stayed still as the bear's gaze moved from her to the fire wizard, the origin of its annoyment. The bear's fur smoked where the firebolt had caught it.

Erza put her hand in front of Lucy as the bear lunged towards Natsu. The wizard tackled on his feet and fell to the ground as he tried to step back. The bear stopped the charge, but it wouldn't just threaten him. It wanted to fight, test its strength. Possibly eat him too. The mage rolled on his stomach, covering his neck with his hands as the bear charged at him again.

"Stop!" Lucy shouted at the bear, her heart jumping in her throat. She didn't know where the courage came from. The bear turned towards her again. Natsu's flame atronach disappeared as the wizard closed its gate.

"Idiot! You're supposed to play dead!" the mage hissed from the ground. "So play dead and it will leave!"

That was what Father had taught her, she recalled. But if she'd play dead now, she wouldn't need to play long. The bear was furious. Too furious to let them be. Lucy stamped her feet as she stepped forward, despite Erza trying to hold her back.

Suddenly, she remembered what Mother told her. Father had dumped it down as foolhardy and stupid, but it had saved Mother's life. Once in the past, before Lucy was even born, Mother had encountered a bear while picking mushrooms. As a fierce Nord woman she was, she shouted at the bear, making it retreat to the woods with her mere voice.

Lucy took a deep breath and stared the bear into the eyes, swinging the bows and arrows in her hands. "Leave him alone!" she shouted as loud as she could. "Go away!"

Erza drew her sword and joined her battlecry. "Don't dare to come closer!"

The bear lost interest in the fire mage and stared at the women. Natsu lifted his head from the ground, dumbfounded and confused. Erza swung her steel in the air as a response to the bear showing its fangs.

"That's close enough!" Lucy shouted as the animal stepped closer. It stopped, murmuring and putting back its ears. "I'm warning you, back off! BACK OFF!"  
The magnitude of her own voice almost frightened her. She had been taught to be nice and quiet as a girl was supposed to be, not screaming like a feral beast. But the bear backed off upon her command. It lumped back to the forest, peeking over its shoulders a couple of times, but it truly left. Lucy's heart pounded so hard her ribs hurt and air ran thin in her windpipe. She couldn't believe the beast was gone – or that the bear had feared her more than she had feared it.

When the bear was out of sight, Erza marched to the fire mage and lifted him up from the collar of his robes.

"IDIOT!" Erza shouted at him, a hundred times louder than Lucy had shouted at the bear. She punched him straight to the cheek with her armoured hand. A loud smack echoed in the air. "I'll gut you like a horker if you don't keep your little flames to yourself from here on! Do I make myself clear?"

Natsu nodded, whimpering as Erza hit him again and dropped him to the ground. He rubbed his bleeding cheek and sullenly stared at Erza's back when she walked to Lucy.

"Are you okay?" the warrior asked her.

"I am", Lucy answered, watching how the mage rose to his staggering feet. Natsu mumbled something about Nord women being worse than bears. She couldn't help but feel bad for him. It wasn't necessarily from Erza to hit him twice. One strike might have been enough to scold him.

"You are braver than you look, Lucy", Erza said and pat her on the shoulder. "Have you ever considered joining the Companions? You'd make a good shield-sister."

Lucy smiled shortly. _I still think magic as my calling_ , she thought but didn't say it aloud.

* * *

The mountain road grew colder with each step. When the sun touched the furthest mountains on the horizon, it was time to set up a camp. Off the road and by the mountain's base, they found a good spot sheltered by large pines and a natural spring close by. Erza worked on with the tent, Lucy picked some snowberries, and Natsu vanished into the woods.

They had come so high that a thin layer of snow covered the ground. Lucy looked at the steps which led from their campsite to the forest and wondered if the mage would return. He hadn't said a single word during the afternoon. Lucy had asked him about alchemy, but he had just grunted and turned away. With Erza she had discussed steel and swords and armour, but that wasn't her true inspiration. She wanted to talk about magic. Not just spells, but about alchemy and enchanting, too.

Lucy picked up a purple mountain flower. It amazed her how they managed to grow through the snow and endure the ruthless cold winds. The flower was the colour of Natsu's hair - pinkish, pale red. It was the shade of his hair which caught her attention when he arrived in the city in a cart, bound in chains.

From the very first sight, she had known he was one of a kind. She hadn't been wrong. Playing fetch with a flame atronach and accidentally hitting a bear? That had to be only a beginning.

Lucy eyed at the steps again. It was getting dark. Erza probably wouldn't care less if he left. Maybe she'd be glad, even. But Lucy didn't want him to leave. She picked another flower and decided to go after the mage, even though her feet ached terribly from the long day's walk.

The steps led her deep into the snowy forest. The twilight had fallen by the time Lucy found Natsu. He sat sulking in front of a small campfire, back towards Lucy as she arrived.

"Why are you here alone?" Lucy asked as she circled around him. The mage raised his head to meet her gaze, and Lucy flinched. His eyes were red and tears had cleaned trails on the dust of his cheeks. "Oh – are you… are you alright? Why are you... crying?"

"I'm not crying", he sniffled and wiped his face. "The damn smoke stings my eyes."

Without arguing furthermore, Lucy sat next to him to warm her hands on the fire. The wind blew the smoke _away_ from him.

"It's okay", Lucy consoled quietly. She found no reason to be rude like he had been yesterday. They both had lost someone close just recently, and even though he claimed otherwise, Lucy knew that loss had hit him hard. A lot harder than he admitted. Witnessing his reaction when he found the remains of his friend told her a lot more than his words.

"I'm not crying", Natsu repeated more loudly, voice trembling.

Lucy looked into the flames as they danced. "I think you are."

Natsu pressed his face into his knees, wrapping his arms around his legs. "Men do not cry."

"What do you do then, huh? Shed some manly water unwillingly from your eyes?"

The mage mumbled something Lucy couldn't hear. She had never seen her father crying – that was the way of the men of Skyrim. You had to be as hard as steel and as cold as the Sea of Ghosts by an unwritten rule. But was it fitting for a fire mage to be cold and heartless? Lucy didn't think so.

"I'm not angry at you", she said, not really knowing what else to say. The bear incident had to be bothering him as well. He had been so quiet ever since. "Why are you here alone?"

"This is my camp."

"Your camp?" Lucy looked around. A small fire wasn't enough to make a camp. "You'll freeze to death without proper shelter."

Natsu scoffed. "And I'll be strangled in my sleep in your _proper shelter_."

"Erza isn't angry at you either. She just… got scared. Bears are fearsome creatures, even for experienced warriors."

"She isn't scared of anything except running out of boys to kill with her bare hands."

"Hey, she's not going to strangle you", Lucy said. "Come with me. Please. The cold will kill you during the night."

Natsu glanced at her. He didn't cry anymore and his voice had balanced close to regular. Lucy felt a bit more at ease.

"You've already collected flowers for my grave?" he said smirking, noticing the mountain flowers in her hand. "How nice of you."

Lucy chuckled. "Of course not. I just… I wondered if these can be used in alchemy. I'd like to learn that, too."

The mage thought for a moment.

"Everything can be used in alchemy", he answered then. "But the results may vary."

"So you do know something about mixing potions."

"It's a small part of our education, but all I can remember is that adding juniper berries to mead helps with stamina. Damn. Now I'm craving some juniper mead..."

Lucy smiled.

"How usual. When a man is sad, they grab a bottle and deny they're sad."

"I'm not -" he started, but realised that he was doing exactly as she said.

"It's okay to miss your friend", Lucy consoled. "I miss my parents every moment. It's just normal to be sad."

He averted her eyes, falling silent again.

"Igneel used to conjure a tent, did you know that?" Natsu chuckled quietly. "Somehow he managed to store a fur tent in a plane of Oblivion, and whenever we needed shelter, he just summoned it. We used the saved time by drinking. I wonder if that tent is still there in Oblivion. Do the daedra use it now?"

"Why don't you ask one of your atronachs?"

"They can't speak, unfortunately."

Lucy's gaze followed the smoke as it rose towards the starlit sky. She didn't know much of Oblivion. Her parents had only told her about Sovngarde, a place in Aetherius where the Nord warriors wound up after death. There was so much about the world she knew nothing about.

"That must have been fun", Lucy said. "Adventuring all around Skyrim with your friend by your side."

"Mostly", the mage answered. "But dangerous as well. I've lost count how many times I've almost lost my life. At least once a day, maybe."

Of that, Lucy had no doubts.

"Do you look for the trouble or does the trouble look for you?"

"I don't know. Both?"

"At least your life hasn't been boring like mine."

"And yours will probably be longer than mine."

"Or the same length if I stick with you."

Natsu silenced.

"That's kinda what I fear", he said. "Look, I… It's normal for me to get into dangerous situations every day. That's how I live. But I don't know what I should do with you around. I'm not used to… you know, protecting anyone. Having to watch what I do. With Igneel we could just mess around and fuck everything up, but now I can't."

Lucy's chest tightened in discomfort. "What do you mean?"

"You'd be better off with Erza", Natsu admitted grimly. "Safer, at least. She could escort you to the College. Or to the Companions, whatever suits you the best."

And now her heart sunk.

"I don't want to join the Companions. I want to learn magic, and I won't learn it from her. And I don't need to be protected! I drove off a bear on my own."

"It's my fault you had to drive off a bear."

"But it's because of you I'm still alive."

"And it's because of the dragon that I'm still alive, and it doesn't mean that the dragon is a good guy I should stay with."

"But you are."

"The dragon or the good guy?"

"An idiot who likes to play with the fire."

Natsu chuckled. "Can't argue with that."

"But it's fine by me. Just forget those silly thoughts and leave this silly 'camp' of yours and come back. Your friend wouldn't want you to freeze to death alone."

"Strangled, frozen, it won't matter to him which way I die..."

"One more time, Erza is _not_ going to strangle you! I won't let her. You're my teacher. And we start today. You come back and we take a look at the spellbook I found. The next time we encounter a bear, I'll be able to cast my first spell!"

Natsu looked into the flames, and Lucy thought he smiled a bit.

"Okay", he answered. "And by the way, if you want to learn alchemy, try eating an ingredient. The way it makes you feel tells about what kind of potions you can make from it. But never eat jarrin root. A tiny bite will lead to instantaneous death."

Lucy nodded and put the purple flower into her mouth. It was dry and hard to bite and bitter of taste.

"Well?" the mage asked.

"I feel a bit warmer, I guess."

* * *

Natsu's cheek still ached by the time they were back at the camp. Erza had caught a rabbit during their absence and sat by the fire with fresh meat cooking on a stick.

"You're a really slow shitter, fire mage", Erza jested as she noticed them coming. Natsu grinned. He'd rather say he was out there shitting than crying. If he hated something about himself, it was his damn eyes which watered a way too much than he'd like. He hoped the redness had already faded. He felt a lot better already.

"Ate about six bowls of spoiled meat brew, does the trick", he answered and sat on the other side of the fire. Lucy put the mountain flowers into her bag and took the spellbook in return, and sat next to Natsu. She opened the book and eyed the first page in awe.

"So these are the instructions for casting this spell?" Lucy asked after a quick reading. "I don't really understand anything."

Natsu took the book from her and closed it. As a person who had never cast anything before, this spell was too hard. One had to learn the basics before anything else.

"You have to feel the magicka in you first. It's in your blood, flowing through you. Close your eyes and try to recognise it."

Lucy did as he told. Natsu remembered the first time he had summoned a wolf. Bretons were inborn conjurers, even though his path had led to the school of destruction. It had been said that all Bretons should be able to conjure a familiar without much training, but it hadn't been that easy. His older brother had been a prodigy. He had conjured storm atronachs even before joining the College and processed with an astonishing brilliance, faster than any other student. At least that was what the teachers said about him.  
And Natsu hated being compared to his brother.

"I think I feel it", Lucy said suddenly. "The magic."

"Then collect it into your hands. Try to cast a little spark first. Imagine a flame and create it from the magic."

Lucy's brow furrowed as she concentrated hard. While conjuration was imbued into the genes of a Breton, all Nords were born with a simple flame spell, even though most never learnt to use it. She opened her eyes when a tiny fire appeared on her palms. Her excitement killed the flame in an instant. The same thing had happened to Natsu, many years ago, when he summoned his first flame. Brother had taught him then.

"I did it!" she exclaimed, looking at the fire mage. Natsu smiled.

"Try to keep it up a little longer", he said and cast a firebolt in his hand. "Like this."

Erza's murderous gaze found him in a second. He resisted the urge to throw it at her face and cancelled the spell. Lucy noticed Erza's disapproval as well.

"Aren't you two thinking about it?" the warrior asked.

"Thinking about what?" Lucy answered.

"The dragons", Erza said. "You were at Helgen. You saw it with your own eyes. Don't you think what it could mean?"

Natsu had no opinion of the dragon's return, so he sat in silence.

"End times", Lucy answered straight up. "It's a sign of the end times."

The warrior nodded. "Something is bringing the dragons back to life, I have no doubt of that. Some say Ulfric Stormcloack is behind it all. What a coincidence it is that a dragon attacks a city for the first time in centuries when he's having his head on a block?"

"Actually, it was my head on the block when the dragon attacked", Natsu chuckled. "One could as well say that I'm the one who brought dragons back."

Erza snorted. "But Ulfric would have been executed after you, I assume. And I don't think it's him. Even though he killed the High King, he doesn't have the power to bring the dragons back."

"There's an ancient prophecy I've read about", Lucy said. "A legend says that the return of the dragons is inevitable. It even said that Alduin, the first dragon, the World-Eater, is going to return and swallow the entire world. The signs are clear. The world is in misrule, torn apart by the civil war..."

"I've heard all kinds of prophecies. That too. Some wise men who know the Elder Scrolls have said that when Alduin returns, the Last Dragonborn will appear as well. But the last of the dragon blood died two hundred years ago, and so their line has ended."

"No offence, Erza, but why's a Companion investigating the dragon attacks anyway?" Natsu asked. "Don't you just beat people and do animal exterminations?"  
"Doesn't a dragon hunt count as animal extermination to you? Jarl Balgruuf's court wizard is investigating the dragon attack, and he asked my help. No-one else seems to be taking care of the true source of the issue."

"I wonder if the Dragonborn would appear, after all", Lucy said. "What if you're the Last Dragonborn, Natsu?"

Natsu's face reddened. "Me? No way. The world would be as good as doomed already."

"I have no doubt of that", Erza said and took the cooked rabbit from the stick. "Are you hungry?"

Natsu _was_ , but he didn't want to take food from her. He shook his head and passed his part of the meat to Lucy. She needed it more than him anyway. Natsu snacked the snowberries he had collected and looked up to the mountain ahead of them. The Throat of the World, they called it. The highest mountain in all of Skyrim, maybe all of Tamriel.

"The Greybeards might know something", Lucy said while eating the rabbit's leg. She noticed him looking at the mountain. "I've only heard stories of them as I lived in the shade of that mountain. I can't believe someone can actually live up there."

"Even if they did, they wouldn't interfere with the rest of the world. Does the College know anything, Natsu?" Erza asked. "I might want to pass by if they do."

"I have no idea", Natsu answered. "It has been weeks since I left. Some probably think we mages caused the dragon's return."

"Possibly. You still deny causing the collapse of Winterhold."

Natsu raised his shoulders. The subject was kind of a taboo among the College, and no-one dared to talk about it much. Around eighty years ago, a series of furious storms plunged the majority of the city into the Sea of Ghosts. While the College stayed unharmed, the Great Collapse had devastating effects on the city, and the mage's reputation as well. Ever since distrusts towards the Mages spread across Skyrim like plague. It still amazed Natsu how Lucy wasn't affected by that plague.

"Anyway, I'm going to sleep now", Erza said after finishing her meal. "If you two want to stay up for a while, please, do not set anything on fire or summon a horde of daedra. I'll not have my sleep interrupted."

Lucy nodded as an answer and the warrior crawled into the tent. Natsu wondered how anyone could sleep with a steel armour on, but maybe the entire woman was made from steel.

Natsu yawned accidentally. The bedroll called him as well.

"Aren't you tired?" he asked. "I think I'll pass out soon."

"Not really. I want to read this book first. Casting that little flame was so amazing I don't want to stop now."

Natsu admired her enthusiasm, but he couldn't keep his eyes open anymore.

"Put the fire out when you're done", he said smiling and followed the warrior into the tent. Erza didn't look so dangerous when tight asleep. Natsu lay down into his bedroll in the other side of the tent, as far away from her as he could.

He closed his tired eyes and dreamt of sharing a mead with Igneel once again.

Natsu awakened in the middle of the night when something soft and small jumped on his chest. He startled, but calmed down at the sight. It was a ghostly pup of a wolf, shining gentle blue light. It licked his cheeks and barked quietly like a dog.

Lucy smiled at the tent's door. "I did it!" she whispered joyfully, trying not to wake Erza. Even if she had conjured only a tiny wolf, it was still a wolf.

Natsu had never seen a perfect novice as talented as her.

* * *

**A/N: A wild bear appears...**


	6. FROSTFALL

Lucy dreamt of the dragon again. 

She was back at Helgen, in the middle of the smoke and destruction. Black wings covered the stormy skies and fire rained down on her, but she did not burn. She stood strong on her ground with a bow in her hand, ready to draw. There wasn’t a single soul left alive but her, only her and the enemy of mankind. Earth quaked under her feet when the dragon landed in front of her, but she did not lose her stance. The dragon opened its mouth, showing her the lines of razor-sharp teeth, the endless black pit about to swallow her whole.

With her heart pounding like a mammoth’s racing steps, she pulled the string and let go. The arrow flew straight into the devil’s throat, tearing it open. A loud, strident shrill pierced the air, and everything became buried under the dragon’s dying scream. 

And Lucy woke up screaming. 

Sunlight filtered through the tent’s open door, and cold air flooded in, stinging her cheeks like needles. Lucy struggled to catch her breath and her dry throat hurt from the shrieking. She squeezed the edge of her bedroll, trying to forget the dream, but failed. _A sign of the end times,_ the legends said.

She had slept in between the mage and the warrior, but now the tent was empty. The wind howled around the tent, swaying the snowy spruces and pines, but she heard no other sound. No song of the birds, no distant chatting, only perfect silence. After regulating her breath, Lucy crawled out from the furs and peeked outside. Faint smoke rose skyward from the dying campfire. The sun had climbed above the trees, and Lucy forgot to breathe again. Had she slept too long? Could Natsu and Erza have moved on without her?

Lucy picked up some branches and put them to the embers, hoping they would lit up. She sat down and wrapped tighter into the fur cloak. The skies were clear and bright, but the sun did not warm her. She hadn’t known how sturdy the wind was up in the mountains. It blew out every flame which sparked in the campfire, and Lucy wanted to cry. Shaking from frustration and fear, she looked around, trying to find a sign of her companions. The wind had wiped out their footprints as well.

Feeling lonely and forgotten, Lucy tried to summon the wolf again, but she felt no magic in her veins. She couldn’t cast a spark either. Maybe there wasn’t really any magic in her at all. What if she had just borrowed some of Natsu’s? All the excitement and joy had been for nothing. The bow leaned next to the tent, but what could she do with that? Nothing. 

Just when Lucy was about to leave the camp and go to ask for a job from Riverwood Trader, she heard a noise from the forest. The empty feeling in her stomach disappeared when she recognised Natsu’s voice. 

”That was my fox, you beast!” the mage shouted. ”I tracked that all morning!” 

”Too late, too bad”, a woman’s voice answered. That was Erza. ”You want to brawl for it? The winner can keep the meat.”

There was no answer. Erza appeared from the snowy forest, carrying a dead fox from the tail. The mage followed her empty-handed, and not so happy. A big, purple bruise marked his cheek. His large eyes had swollen during the night. Lucy smiled at him, but he did not answer her smile. Sullenly, he sat down on the other side of the campfire and lit the branches up with a swift move a hand. 

”I had to freeze my ass off without making a single sound for hours, and you decided to steal my prey?” Natsu asked Erza as she began to skin the fox with her blade. ”Why you didn’t kill some rabbits instead? I’m starving! A man can’t live on snowberries.”

If Lucy recalled right, Natsu had refused to take the rabbit Erza had caught yesterday, even when she had offered it to him. He’d rather starve than swallow his pride, it seemed. A stubborn little mage. No wonder he was so small. 

”Did you sleep well, Lucy?” Erza asked, ignoring Natsu’s complaining completely. ”He told me you stayed up late and learned to conjure a wolf. Is that true?”

Lucy gathered her lost voice.

”It is”, she whispered and couched. Natsu glanced at Lucy and gave her a sip from his waterskin, noticing the dryness of her throat. Lucy took it gladly. ”And I slept too well, I guess... Why didn’t you wake me?”

”You need sleep to heal from what happened at Helgen. You are still in shock”, the Companion told. It amazed Lucy how fast she skinned the fox. Erza had truly skinned a lot of animals, like a true hunter. She separated the meat from bones and put the pieces on sticks to grill on the campfire. ”I and the fire mage decided to go hunting while you slept. This may be the last meal we’ll have besides snowberries before we reach the Rift. There isn’t any game in the mountain pass for the frost trolls hunt everything there is to eat.”

Natsu stoked the fire with his flame spell. The meat cooked faster in magical flames. Its warmth lifted Lucy’s spirit a bit. She put her feet closer to the flames, for she couldn’t feel her toes inside the fur boots. 

”I heard your scream”, Natsu said to her and took the waterskin back. ”Had a nightmare?”

Lucy nodded timidly.

”I dreamt about the dragon, again”, she started. ”I was back in Helgen, all alone, and had to fight that thing on my own.”

Natsu looked at her from under his brows. ”You’re not on your own. We’re here.”

Burning hot tears welled up in her eyes, but she didn’t let them fall. For a moment, she had thought they had truly left her alone. Lucy wiped her face to hide her reaction. She didn’t want to cry in front of him anymore.

”What’s our plan for today?” Lucy changed the subject. ”We’re going to a mountain pass?”

”Exactly. We leave after we’ve eaten, and we won’t rest until we are on the other side of the pass. So eat well. You too, Natsu”, Erza answered and gave one of the skewers to the mage. He took it reluctantly. 

”I don’t like fox meat -”

Erza gave him a murderous stare. ”You eat it, or I will force it down your throat.” 

Natsu quit his complaints in an instant and begun to eat. Lucy smirked and took her own portion from the fire. She let it cool down for a moment before taking a taste. The meat was tougher than anything she had eaten before. Her jaws ached from chewing it, but it was a meal, after all. She couldn’t live on snowberries and apples.

After they had eaten, it was time to put out the camp. Erza started to pack the tent and Lucy went to fill the waterskins from the spring. She kneeled next to the pond, collected icy cold water in her hands and washed her face. Lucy shrieked and shuddered as it refreshed her senses. Quiet steps crunched on the snow behind her.

”I can’t wait ’til we reach an inn”, Natsu said and crouched next to her. He made a cup from his hands, picked up water and warmed it with magic before washing his bruised cheek. ”I just want to have a warm bath. I reek. Can’t remember when I last washed. Too long ago, even for me.”

”I’d like a bath, too”, Lucy answered, hiding her envy behind a faint smile. She hadn’t even thought magic could be used like that. ”And no offence, I can smell that.”

He chuckled. ”Igneel used to smell worse. Damn elves and their elven sweat...”

His voice cracked a bit every time he said the name of his deceased friend. Lucy had just joked – she could barely smell anything, for the fur cloak insulated him rather well. Only a faint hint of smoke. Lucy filled the three waterskins and rose up. 

”I wanted to wake you up”, Natsu whispered before she left. ”I thought we should tell you we’d go looking for something to eat, but Erza said you’d be fine. Sorry if you thought we’d left you behind.”

Lucy turned around. The mage gazed into the water, avoiding her eyes. She had almost forgotten that already, but remembered what Natsu had promised yesterday. At least he tried to adjust into his new role of keeping her safe. It warmed Lucy’s heart. She had said she'd be able to protect herself, but it had been half a lie. But if Natsu had saved her from a dragon, he'd be able to save her from any danger which lied ahead. She hoped he'd realise that. 

”It’s okay”, she answered. ”We should get going. The sooner we go, the sooner we find you a bath.”

The mage made a snowball and threw it into Lucy’s back as she walked away.

* * *

The weather changed by the time they reached the mountain pass. Dark clouds filled the skies as the road narrowed and rock walls grew to frame their road. A sinister sign, Natsu thought. It would snow soon, and heavily.

”How do you stand the cold?” Lucy asked him, breaking the silence before it grew awkward. ”You have nothing but robes under that cloak. Does it have something to do with your magic? Does it warm you?”

Natsu raised his shoulders and held his hood as the wind tried to blow it away. 

”I think I’m used to it. Winterhold is the coldest corner of Skyrim. Sometimes there’s snow even in the middle of the summer. But I think you’ll be fine. Nord blood should keep you warm.”

”I doubt that. I can’t feel my fingers.”

”There’s a crazy Nord in the College who barely wears any clothes. His name is Gray, and he'd go into a snowstorm in his underwear. He makes me think all Nords are resistant to cold, or something.”

”Really?”

A furious whirlwind swept through the pass, stopping their movement for a moment. Speaking of snowstorms, it seemed there would be one. The air became colder and colder every moment, and the first snowflakes fell on Natsu’s pink hair.

”We’ll stay in a cave if a storm comes”, Erza shouted through the wind. She walked ahead of them like a scout. ”It’s too dangerous to continue in a blizzard. This area is known of its frost trolls.”

The thought of a cave did not excite Natsu. He had stayed in a way too many caves to know what they kept inside. Of all of the underground creatures, he hated frostbite spiders the most. One time when he and Igneel were exploring a cave, a giant spider descended from the ceiling right on him. It had bitten him from the back with its poison fangs and would have probably killed him too if he’d been alone. Igneel managed to slay it right on time, but the bite wound had ached for a month. And the poison – Natsu didn’t even want to remember how it had made him feel. 

They continued their journey, but the blasts forced them to stop every now and then. The few snowflakes changed into a thick veil of falling snow. Erza’s scarlet hair popped out of the grey and white in front of Natsu – otherwise, there was nothing to see but snow. Every minute, he checked for Lucy if she was still beside him. He couldn’t hear her steps. He barely heard his own thoughts. 

”What are you going to do if we make it to the College?” Lucy asked, almost shouting. The word _if_ strangled him like a rope. Of course, they’d make it. _Of course._

”I have to tell them Igneel died. Probably why, too”, Natsu answered. _One day at least one of you is going to get killed_ , Arch-Mage Makarov had told them last year. Natsu didn’t remember what they had done that time. Probably something really bad. ”The old man is going to… Oh no... Anything but _that_...”

Lucy stared at him as colour escaped his face. ”What’s that?”

A loud growl echoed from the mountain walls. Natsu halted and looked into every direction, but saw no source for the voice. He heard again, louder than before. Lucy stepped closer to him, having heard it too. 

”And what was _that_ ?” she whispered, reaching for her bow and arrows. Fear spread in Natsu’s lungs like frost. _I know you’re not ready for such a dangerous trip, but I’ll try to keep you safe,_ he had promised. Maybe the time had come to actually _keep_ that promise. 

Erza’s steel sword clashed as she pulled it from the seath. 

”Two frost trolls right ahead!” the Companion shouted. The scarlet spot disappeared into the blizzard. ”We can’t escape them, so we have to fight! Natsu, you take the one on the left!”

The mage put his hand in front of Lucy to keep her away from the battle. 

”You stay back, we will handle this”, Natsu told her and conjured a flame atronach. It appeared through the purple gate and threw a fireball towards the growling noise, showing Natsu where the enemy was. He cast the flame cloak spell, surrounding himself in a wall of fire. Lucy stepped away from him, following his command. Natsu nodded to her before running after his atronach.

Natsu formed the root of the flame spell in his palms when he saw the troll. It climbed on the mountain wall, grunting as its thick, shaggy white fur caught the atronach’s fire. It had been a long while since he had last seen a troll. He had forgotten how ugly they were. A third eye nestled in the middle of its forehead and its jaws were filled with jagged teeth, which would surely tear him apart in a second. The troll jumped down and knocked the flame atronach out of existence with its lengthy, muscular arms. 

The mage swallowed his fear when the troll charged at him, full speed. Its height towered above him, and it was twice as large as Natsu, but he wasn’t frightened. Trolls were vulnerable to fire, he knew. Steel, speed and aggression might work, but not as well as fire. Natsu put his hands together, dual casting flames directly into the troll’s face. The beast’s grunts changed into fearful whines. They were aware of their weakness as well.

And suddenly, an iron arrow pierced the air. It struck into the troll’s arm, evoking the troll’s wrath even more. Natsu glanced over his shoulder. The silhouette of the Nord girl stood out through the veil of snow, and another arrow flew right past Natsu’s ear, straight to the beast’s chest. The troll roared and pulled the arrows from its flesh. Its wounds closed in an instant.

”You regenerative bastard...” Natsu grunted and dodged the swing of the troll’s arm. Its razor-sharp nails grazed Natsu’s fur robe, but his flame cloak damaged the troll in return. He leapt backwards as the beast chased him, pressing him closer to the rock wall with no escape. Natsu blasted fire against the troll, but it rushed through the flames with bloodlust gleaming in its three eyes.

Biting his lip, he felt the wall closing in. A few more meters and he’d be trapped. He changed his course to the back right, closer to Lucy. The troll’s breath became shallow as another arrow found its back. It must have hit the lung. _I have to kill it now before it regenerates again,_ Natsu thought. He pulled the orcish dagger from his belt. As fast as he could, he circled behind the troll. In a moment’s act of insane courage, he jumped into the troll’s back, clutching his fingers into the white fur.

Natsu saw movement in the corner of his eye. He shoved his dagger straight into the frost troll’s neck, severing its arteries. It fell on its stomach, howling as it died. Blood sprayed on Natsu’s face when he pulled the blade back from its flesh. He turned his head to check on Lucy and heard her scream before his eyes caught the third troll, who grabbed her from behind. 

”Lucy!” 

Natsu’s shout was left to echo in the mountains as the troll lifted the wriggling, screaming girl on its shoulder and vanished into the snowstorm.

* * *

**A/N: A wild troll appears...**


	7. PRINCE OF TRICKERY

Natsu’s heart skipped a beat or two as he stared at the vacant space where Lucy had been. His flame cloak dissolved, letting wind and snow whip his face like a thousand tiny blades. Blood flooded from the troll’s opened neck, soaking through his boots. Lucy’s absence turned his legs into two unmovable, frozen trunks.

_I’ll try to keep you safe._

Her scream faded with every wasting second. Running steps closed in, steel clanking on steel. Natsu turned his head towards the noise. His hollow gaze met Erza and her sword, stained in bright crimson.  
  
”What happened?” the warrior questioned. ”Where’s Lucy?”

Natsu couldn’t speak. He peered down and stepped away from the red pool spreading on the snow. His shivering fingers squeezed around the dagger. Failure pressured his chest, gnawing his insides like an ice wraith.  
  
_I couldn’t keep you safe even for one single day._

”WHERE’S LUCY!?”

Erza grabbed him from the harness of his cloak and pulled him closer. Forcing him into an eye-contact, she shook him vigorously, demanding for an answer. Natsu raised his hands to cover his face. There was nothing but anxious urgency in Erza’s voice.

”There… There was a third...” he stuttered quietly, ”a third troll, it… it got her...”

”A troll got her?”

The mage nodded and held his breath. Against his expectations, Erza put him down gently instead of throwing him against the rock. His legs almost gave up as his bloody boots touched the ground. The tension in his arms wore off and they fell lifelessly to his sides, for all his focus was on holding back the tears.   
  
”It picked her up and ran downhill”, Natsu whispered, nearly sobbing. He lowered his gaze again. ”I… I… I didn’t see until it was too late!”  
  
Natsu’s eyes registered something dashing at him, too fast for him to take cover. Then there was pain. Erza hit him to the cheek, giving him another black eye. Natsu’s head swung to the side from the force of her strike, but his arms stayed limp – why would he even try to defend? That was less than he deserved.   
  
”TOO LATE!?” she yelled. Natsu shuddered – even his dead mother hadn’t yelled at him so loudly. ”Don’t you hear her screaming? It will be too late if you just stand there like a dead tree, you goddamn idiot! Come on and let’s go save her!”  
  
Erza wasted no more time. She left Natsu alone as she rushed after the fading screams, disappearing into the blizzard. She ran past Lucy’s backpack lying on the ground, and the purple spellbook which had slipped out. The sight struck Natsu’s heart like a dagger made of frost. Was this how Igneel had felt all the time? Powerless, useless and weak? No. Igneel had always been brave and strong, risking his own life for Natsu's sake. He had pulled him out of a giant spider’s mouth, jumped into a frigid stream to catch him when he had fallen off a bridge. Damn, he even fought away the sabre tigers Natsu had provoked on purpose. He would have died a million times without Igneel’s help. 

Even though Igneel’s boots were too large for him to fill, Natsu stepped into them. Lucy was just like he had been one day, a novice at someone else’s mercy. Natsu took a deep breath, pushing the shame and guilt aside. With staggering steps, he walked to Lucy’s things, leaving bloody footprints on the snow. 

Natsu picked up the spellbook. If Lucy had learned to cast that spell in less than a day, what could she achieve if given just a chance? She’d achieve anything. The melted snow disguised the tear which ran down his face. He didn’t bother to wipe it. Natsu put the book into the bag, tossed it on his shoulder to accompany his own and hurried after Erza.   


* * *

  
When the beast smashed her on the cave’s stone floor, Lucy prayed she’d lose consciousness. Almost hyperventilating, she rolled on her back and tried to crawl into some safety. The troll stared at her futile efforts with a strange, feral amusement. Was this really the true nature of Skyrim’s wilderness? Would her story end so ridiculously fast? Tears of terror flooded on her cheeks. 

Lucy didn’t know how far the troll had taken her. All light had gone out, and the darkness had continued until now. Light entered the cavern through a crack on the ceiling. Her mind was too panicked to study the environment. Lucy touched her forehead. Liquid stained her skin, and she lowered her hand to see it was blood. Her head had banged against the rock walls as the troll had carried her through the narrow tunnels.

The frost troll was over two meters tall and hideously ugly. Three eyes stared right into hers. Lucy’s back hit the wall and she clawed the ground with her nails. She had dropped her bow, not that she could use it anyway. Her hands quaked so horribly she wouldn’t be able to grab an arrow. What would she do? The troll made no move. It just glared at her, almost as if _waiting._

Slowly, Lucy’s eyes made the best out of the small light of the place. Constantly keeping her gaze locked on the beast in front of her, she tried to form an image of the cave. Looking for an escape route, she followed the visible edges and walls, seeing no other tunnel than the one she came from. The one which the troll was blocking.   
  
”Shit”, she mumbled under her breath. A loud snort filled the chamber, and Lucy flinched, eyes flitting back to the beast. Did they have such a precise hearing? There were several meters between them.  
  
More likely, did it _understand_ her cursing?  
  
Unlike the troll Natsu had fought, this didn’t seem as hostile. It could have already bashed her head in with its bare hands if it just wanted. For some reason, it had kept her alive. Her stomach sunk when it crossed her mind that the troll might do something much worse than kill her. It could just… Lucy’s insides twisted at the thought and she felt her breakfast rising up her throat.

Swallowing hard, she tried a different approach. Determination. Insane bravery. Not being such a weakling. _What would Natsu do?_   
  
_Something stupid._  
  
”Hey, ugly bastard”, Lucy whispered, ”do you hear me?”

The troll grunted again, proving her doubts right. It didn’t seem to mind. It turned around, walking deeper into the room, closer to the light source. Then Lucy saw it. Something like an… altar stood in the middle of the chamber. Small candles were lit on the stone pillars which surrounded a statue. It wasn’t an altar. It was a shrine.   
  
Lucy felt her heart racing, and the moment’s bravery faded. _Is it going to… sacrifice me or something?_  
  
Gods. Things just kept going worse, and worse, and worse. Instead of thinking about what Natsu would do, Lucy started to hope he’d come and save her. She wouldn’t make it on her own. Had he even noticed she was gone? Erza had been on the other side of the pass, but would she care? What if more trolls had come and killed them both?

The troll jumped up and down in front of the statue. It depicted a small man with horns in his head holding a strange, horned masque. Grunting, the beast kneeled in front of the shrine. Lucy couldn’t see properly from the distance, but it seemed the troll kept his fingers together as if it was praying.

Lucy furrowed her brows. Since when did the trolls pray to a man-built shrine? There was no time to think about that. She eyed the tunnel’s mouth, realizing her chance to escape was now. Carefully moving to a crouching position, she began to sneak closer to the tunnel, as quiet as she could. Gladly, leather armour made no noise. She’d become minced meat if she didn’t leave… or if the troll caught her leaving.

Seconds passed in silence until the troll let out a deafening roar. Startled, Lucy peeked over her shoulder. In a berserk rage, it began to punch the statue again and again. It jumped to the statue’s neck and hit the features carved in stone. It turned its ugly head to the direction it had left Lucy. Another angry grunt. It realized she was missing. A bolt of raw adrenaline shot through her veins. Lucy rose up and bolted forward, boots slipping on the icy floor as she sprinted to the tunnel.

Panicked, she panted and fumbled in the dark passage as the troll’s roars and steps echoed behind her. The tunnel twisted and turned, she hit into each corner. Her forehead opened again, bleeding into her eyes and mixing with her tears. She wouldn’t make it. The troll was faster than her and it could see in the dark. Desperation filled her frightened body as she heard the beast reaching the tunnel. She squeezed her eyes closed, running blindly for her dear life. As much as she wanted to see her parents again, being butchered by a frost troll wasn't the way she wanted to go.

And then she dashed against something soft instead of cold hard stone. She let out a whimper when arms wrapped around her. For a second she thought she rammed on another troll, but this one was a lot smaller, and didn’t smell of rotten flesh. An enormous wave of relief washed over her body when she recognised the smoky scent.

”Natsu!” 

The mage didn’t answer. He just grabbed her from the wrists and pulled her behind him. Helplessly shaking, Lucy peeked through her eyelids. A ball of blue light hovered above him, illuminating the narrow tunnel. _Candlelight,_ the spell was called.   
  
”Stay back”, Natsu prompted strictly. Lucy clutched her fingers into the mage’s cloak like her life dependent on him. Hearing the troll’s fast approach, Natsu prepared a firebolt in between his palms, ready to aim. Lucy flinched when the first hints of white fur showed behind the tunnel’s corner, and the mage launched the flaming ball straight at it.

The troll screamed and retreated back where it came from.  
  
Lucy gasped for air in short, rapid bursts. Natsu turned his head and shouted, ”Erza! Found her, she’s here!” Then he looked at Lucy, still staying alert for the troll. He lifted her trembling chin up towards the light. She felt like the smallest being in the whole world.  
  
”You’re hurt”, he whispered, wiping the blood from her forehead. Lucy couldn’t say anything. She knew she was, but she felt no pain. The mage said something else, but she didn’t hear. The world was muting around her. A burning feeling spread in her neck, nauseating her as her legs went limp. Her vision began to fade. Natsu caught her before she fell, and she registered a scarlet spot appearing through the mist.   
  
And then there was only darkness.  


* * *

  
The relief of finding her alive wore off the moment she passed out.   
  
”Hey, Lucy! Are you okay?” Natsu asked, gently shaking her shoulders. No response. Erza kneeled next to them, keeping an eye out for the corner ahead. There was no guarantee the troll was gone for good. Even if it was, it would have to pay for what it did, but only after they had helped Lucy.  
  
”She’s out of it”, Erza said and placed her armoured hand on Natsu’s shoulder. He shuddered a bit. ”But you did well. She’ll live.”  
  
Her compliment only warmed him so much. He wiped more blood from Lucy’s face to see where it came from. She had hit her head more than once. Her blonde hair had rusty stripes all around. Crimson fluid oozed from her forehead, replacing what Natsu had just wiped. She had a concussion. He had dealt with that kind of a problem before. Countless times, to be exact.  
  
”Watch out for the troll while I patch her up”, Natsu told the Companion. They had many lessons in College for healing injured fellows, and he remembered them well. Life with Igneel had made sure his restoration skills never got rusty. He placed his palms above Lucy’s head and cast the spell _Healing Hands._ Light flashed from his fingers and circled around the girl’s wounds, closing them slowly. His guilt eased a bit.  
  
Erza looked impressed, surprised by what ’patching up’ meant for a mage. Nords shunned magic, sometimes for a reason, but if used right, it certainly was the true power of the world. At least it worked better than bandages and stitches. Minor scratches didn’t even leave a scar when healed with magic.  
  
Lucy seemed to come back to her senses as the bleeding stopped. She blinked her eyes, which was a good sign. Losing consciousness for more than a few minutes usually wasn’t. Natsu remembered the time they passed through Labyrinthian, trying to save time. He had slipped at the stairs as they escaped angry frost trolls, and fallen headfirst into the rocks below. Igneel had been sure he’d lost him when it took an hour for him to awaken. Their attempt to save time failed miserably.  
  
”I’ve never heard of trolls capturing people”, Erza commented, still keeping watch. ”I think something is wrong. A regular troll would have killed her already.”  
  
Natsu lifted his shoulders. ”Maybe. It looked normal to me.”  
  
He lowered his eyes to Lucy when she coughed. The Candlelight expired, and Natsu cast another one. It took a few seconds until the passage was enlightened again.   
  
”I… I...” the girl stuttered, taking her time to recover. ”I think… it understood what I said.”

That distracted Erza from her guard duty. She turned towards the girl and asked, ”Really? What did you say?”

”Just cursed…”  
  
Natsu chuckled. The girl coughed again and tried to move, until she realised she was on Natsu’s lap. A slight blush spread on her cheeks, or maybe it was just the blood returning to her head. Natsu hoped for the latter. He didn’t exactly feel the most comfortable either, to hold her like that.  
  
”It’s still out there”, he said, hearing the troll’s grunts. ”We should kill it.”

Erza frowned. ”Wait a moment. What was it doing? Did you see, Lucy?”

The girl concentrated, gathering her memory. Panic used to make memories scarce. ”There… There’s a shrine. A man holding up a horned mask. I think the troll was praying, until it attacked the statue.”

”A shrine?” Natsu raised his brow as a vague insight flashed in his mind. ”Did the statue have a dog too?”

”I didn’t see… I… I don’t remember.” Lucy tried to move again, and Natsu helped her to sit. He felt relieved she was better, and that she could support herself on her own. Even though her body shivered helplessly from head to toes.

The mage browsed through his inner knowledge. More and more often he wished he had concentrated on the boring lessons too. Igneel had been like a walking notebook, wiser than most elders. Natsu rarely had to figure anything out by himself, for Igneel always knew everything there was to know. Suddenly, he remembered one thing. Something his brother once said. ”Damn. Could it be?” he wondered aloud.

”Could it be what?” Erza asked.

”A shrine of a Daedric Prince, Clavicus Vile.”

Her glare told she did not approve him. ”How do you know of Daedric Princes?”

”Hey, I even have a tent stored in Oblivion”, Natsu grinned. ”Let’s just say that I’ve heard of them, but not personally meddled with any. I’ve only dealt with the lessen Daedra I can summon.”  
  
Lucy looked at him in marvel. If magic was disliked among the people of Skyrim, Daedra worship was hardly tolerated. Especially since the Oblivion Crisis. The Vigilants of Stendarr, a militant order following the God of Mercy made sure no-one cavorted with the Daedra. _Walk always on the light, or we will drag you to it,_ they said. However, it didn’t stop power-hungry people from turning to the dark lords.   
  
Lucy had possibly heard of them too. ”And Clavicus Vile was the Prince of...”  
  
”Bargains. Wishes, trickery, power… He deals with that kind of things”, Natsu answered. ”My brother told me about him. Clavicus loves toying with mortals for his own entertainment.”  
  
Personally, Natsu didn’t have any opinion of the Gods. His family had prayed to Kynareth, the goddess of air and elements, but Natsu didn’t follow that path. The only thing he was sure of was that the gods didn’t do a damn thing. _'Do they even exist? How can anyone tell? But Daedra Lords, they exist. They do things. Bad things, mostly, but things I can see The gods? They don't do a damn thing._ ' That's what brother had once said, and it had rooted in Natsu's mind.   
  
”What… what are we going to do now?” Lucy asked quietly. She took support on Natsu’s shoulder as she stood up. It felt a bit strange, but Natsu didn’t push her away. It was his fault she was in that condition, after all.   
  
”We should try to solve this situation, just to be sure”, Erza answered. ”As a Companion, I can’t risk having this happening to anyone else. It would be against my honour.”  
  
Lucy nodded and let go of the mage. She took a few feeble steps on her own before collapsing again. Erza caught her this time.   
  
”And you shouldn’t push yourself”, the warrior told her. ”Let me and Natsu handle this.”

Natsu agreed. He heard the troll’s distant growls, and the sound of fists beating on stone. ”I’ll check this out first”, he said and left the girls. He moved closer to the noise, as quiet as he could. Aware of his slim physique, he had invested a great deal of time in learning how to stay undetected. Sneaking past the danger had saved his life more than once. There wasn’t much he could do to a fully armoured bandit chief with a heavy battle-axe, except to be split in two himself.   
  
The Candlelight expired again right before the tunnel ended. Natsu crouched behind a stone. He had been right. The shrine in the middle of the chamber was exactly like he had seen in the books, except that the dog was missing from its side. But why was Clavicus’s shrine up here, in a cave in the middle of nowhere? Shivers ran down Natsu’s spine as he saw the troll. It sat in front of the statue, hugging its own knees and rocking back and forth. He had never seen a troll behaving that way.

Erza and Lucy approached behind him. Natsu turned his head towards them. ”It’s just sitting there.”

”Strange”, the warrior said as she saw it too. ”An aberrant one.”  
  
Lucy appeared to be deep in thought, but not as afraid as she was earlier. Though she stopped and tensed when she saw the troll, possibly reliving the capture, she stayed courageous. She recovered her strength fast.

”What if it… what if it wants to wish something from Clavicus, but doesn’t know how to speak?” she wondered, rubbing her chin.

”Trolls aren’t that intelligent. Until…”

”Until it is a person trapped in a troll’s body?”

Natsu’s eyes widened. He stared at Lucy, frowning.

”I want to try something”, Lucy continued and stepped out of the shadow. Natsu wanted to hiss at her to stop such madness, but it was too late. The troll’s eyes found her. Natsu rose up from his hiding place to have Lucy’s back. The beast froze when it saw him. Yes, trolls were aware of their weakness to fire, but this advanced fear wasn’t usual. 

”Hey, you ugly shit”, she hollered at the troll, her voice echoing in the chamber. ”Do you understand me? Raise your hands if you do.”

”You’re gonna get us killed”, Natsu mumbled nervously. The beast stared at them in silence until it slowly raised its arms towards the ceiling. Impressed beyond words, the mage glanced at Lucy, wondering what she’d do next. She was _smart,_ in the whole definition of the word.

She walked closer to the shrine, remaining surprisingly calm. Natsu and Erza followed right behind her. Erza drew her sword out for precaution. ”Are you a human? Lower your hands if you are”, Lucy continued.

A man’s voice filled the room like a bolt of lightning, just as sudden and deafening.

 _ **”A maid has come to rescue the beast, huh?**_ ” Natsu felt like the voice was inside his head, but from everyone’s reaction, he knew they heard it too. _**”How boring. I was excepting something more… violent.”**_

Lucy’s head spun around, looking for the source of that voice. ”Are you Clavicus Vile?”  
  
 _ **”What? Of course, I am! You are talking to the Prince of Trickery, my dear.”**_  
  
The troll got on its feet. It tried to move closer to them, but Natsu formed a fireball in his hand. The warning worked, and the beast kept its distance.   
  
”Did you turn a person into a frost troll?”  
  
Lucy’s question made the troll snort and jump, swinging its arms. Had it been just asking for help? When Natsu had searched through the cave, he had noticed that there had been people just recently. Probably some Daedra worshippers. Their belongings were all over the place and their provisions left uneaten. They had left in a hurry. What would drive them out faster than a frost troll lurking in the shadows?

 _ **”It might be that I did. Maybe”**_ , Clavicus answered. _**”A young man came to me, and begged me to make him stronger. And look at him now! He’s gone berserk, attacking my ugly statue as if I’d even care!”**_

”He probably didn’t want to become a troll...”

_**”He wanted to be strong, and now he’s stronger than any man he rivals with! He should be dancing from happiness.”** _

”But he can’t be left like that”, Erza joined the conversation. Her frowning expression told she didn’t like discussing with a Daedric Prince. It had to be against her strict morals. ”Turn him back to normal.”

 _ **”Ugh. That's your wish? Why would I do that? It isn’t fun. Not at all. Guess I’ll have to make my own fun elsewhere.”**_  
  
Lucy kept rubbing her chin. ”There has to be something… You’re the Prince of Bargains? What would you want in return if you turn him back?”

_**”What would I want from mortals like you? Just kill the beast, that will end his misery. You, little fire mage, should be able to do it in no time. Now leave me alone. I’ve got better things to do.”** _

Natsu smirked. ”Like searching for your dog?”

 ** _”What? What dog? I don’t have a dog.”_**  
  
”You should have. Half of your power resides in that mutt. Even if you agreed to turn that thing back to normal, you couldn’t, because you’re weak now. How does it feel to be such a weakling?”

A pressuring silence fell. Lucy stared at Natsu, her eyes saying, 'you're gonna get us killed.' He kept smiling impishly. He had a plan.

_**”Listen here you little shit, I’ll turn you next if -”** _

”If your dog has gone missing, we can surely help you. You can’t manifest far from this shrine anyway. Will you turn this man back to normal if we bring your dog back and return you to your full power?”

Clavicus was silent again.

 _ **”Well… I indeed had a bit of a falling out with that insufferable pup. I banished Barbas, and now he’s somewhere out there, looking for someone who can settle our… disagreement. I’m glad to be rid of him, but as much as I hate to say it, you’re almost as powerful as I am now. Come to think of it… maybe it would be a win-win situation for both of us. Maybe. No promises. I’ve grown fond to this little troll… Maybe I’ll make it my new pet...”**_  
  
”So do we have a deal? We bring your dog back, and you turn this person back to normal?”

 ** _”Fine, fine. If you bring him to me, I’ll grant you my boon. No strings attached. No messy surprises. At least, not for you...”_**  
  
Clavicus’s voice faded. The troll collapsed on its knees, praising the ground in front of them. Natsu felt sick in his stomach. There was truly a person trapped inside, unable to communicate… what a horrible fate. 

”Don’t worry, you’ll be back to normal soon”, Natsu told the troll. Traces of humanity gleamed behind those ugly three eyes, pleading to be released. ”But don’t go kidnapping any more maids, please? You’ve caused enough pain for our Lucy. You really scared the shit out of us.”

The troll nodded repeatedly. It took a few steps towards Lucy with open arms. Even knowing it was a human, Lucy rejected its affection by stepping behind the mage. Natsu could easily understand why. 

”There’s one thing you could do for us”, Erza said to the beast. Its head tilted towards the warrior. ”We are going to stay in this cave, for we can’t travel in the storm. As payment for what you did, you will keep a watch for the night. Prevent any bandits, vampires or other trolls entering the cave, and we’ll be even.”

It nodded again, giving them a friendly grunt. Natsu scorned. Then the troll left to the tunnel behind the statue, which most likely led outside. Lucy let out a sigh of relief, and her shoulders finally relaxed.

”We should go now”, the warrior said when the troll had gone. ”All your stuff is safe with us, your bow and everything. We left our belongings to the largest chamber so we could find you faster. The pilgrims have made this cave rather liveable, with fireplaces and all. I’d almost say it will be a pleasant stay.”

”So, maybe this was a lucky accident, after all...” Lucy answered, faking happiness. A lucky accident she would rather not have had.

”Yeah, let’s go and check if the Daedra worshipping motherfuckers left anything good behind!”

”Natsu!”

* * *

The mage grinned as they left the cavern, hoping he’d find some riches. Or, if not riches, some food would be nice. And fresh robes. Pilgrims often wore robes. Just before he stepped into the tunnel, Clavicus spoke to him again.

_**”Hey, fire mage, have you heard of your big brother?”** _

Natsu’s heart jumped into his throat. Lucy and Erza halted as well. He turned around, staring at the statue, even though the voice didn’t come from the stone. For a second Natsu hoped Clavicus mistook him for someone else. ”What about him? How do you know him?”

_**”Oh, he came to me with a request, once. Such a majestic wizard indeed, yet there was one thing even he couldn’t do… and neither could I.”** _

There was no mistake. Clavicus knew his brother, and recognised him at the same. Anger began to bubble in his stomach. For all these years, Natsu hadn’t found a single clue of his brother, until now. And the fact that the Prince was just teasing him made Natsu want to punch him. ”When was that?”

 _ **”I don’t know. Five years or fifty? You mortals have such a different flow of time.”**_  
  
The mage scoffed. ”I haven’t heard of him, but he’s alive. That’s all I care.”

_**”I know, I know. He’s gained quite a reputation among us, especially our old Molag Bal might have taken a liking of him...”** _

Natsu swallowed as a lump formed in his throat. ”Molag Bal?” His voice shivered. He did not want to know the rest. Lucy noticed his discomfort, gently grabbing his sleeve. Natsu paid no attention to her, for the damned Daedra captured all of his focus.

_**”But oh, that’s all I can tell you for free… There’s actually something I’d want in return for more information of your dear brother.”** _

”As I said I do not care!” he shouted.  
  
_**”Such a shame. But I’ll tell him you stopped by, if I get a chance...”**_

The Prince disappeared again, leaving Natsu with bitterness he hadn't felt in years. What a lucky accident, indeed...

* * *

**A/N: Shrine of Clavicus**

**Hi guys! This chapter was a bit lengthy but I hope you didn't mind. Didn't find any good spot to cut it. As you possibly figured out already, there was a big reference to the Vulkan/Macao arc in the beginning of FT. Thought it was fitting do to :D This was also a good spot to drop some hints of Zeref! What do you think has happened to him?**


	8. NIGHTSHADE

Erza’s definition of a ’pleasant stay’ didn’t really match Lucy’s. Maybe she had set her hopes up too high, but when they found the pilgrims' settlement, she couldn’t help but feel disappointed.

In the largest chamber of the cave were something Lucy’d call a poor campsite, at best. The wooden structures were at least a century old, built by the previous generation of Daedra worshippers. The air smelled of moldy cellar – in a twisted way, it reminded Lucy of home. Water had damaged the cellar of their house, and the potatoes and bread stored there were always stale. And when Erza said ’fireplace’, she had misled Lucy to think there was actually going to be a real hearth. She had to settle with a large campfire surrounded by round stones.

Not having the guts to complain, Lucy sat in front of the fire. Her head hurt. She was still a bit beside herself, flinching at every unexcepted noise. A thin layer of frost covered the ground and walls, but at least they were sheltered from the blizzard. Warming her frozen fingers near the flames, she studied the place. There were bookshelves, tables and chairs on the wooden platforms. Some barrels, too, but their contents were most likely ruined by moisture. Abandoned bedrolls scattered the platform as well as the cave’s floor, with a few locked travel chests. The troll had really scared away those who had last been there.

”Damn!”

Lucy turned her head towards the cursing fire mage. Natsu crouched near one of the chests, trying to pick its lock. A ball of light hovered above him, casting his shadow on the wall. He had been trying to open that chest for a good while now, and was visibly running out of patience. Grimacing, Natsu stood up and kicked the wooden box as hard as he could.

”Stay locked then, bitch!” His shout echoed in the cave. ”Didn’t wanna open you anyway!”

Erza sneered. She had taken off her armour and stretched her limbs in the campfire’s warmth. Seeing her in a linen long-sleeved undershirt and pants felt strange to Lucy. Under all that steel was hidden a womanly figure she almost envied. ”Do you need help, mage?” the Companion asked. ”I can break the wood with my sword.”

”You’d just break the stuff inside”, Natsu mumbled and went through his pockets. ”Fuck… I’m all out of lockpicks...”

The mage had been a little off ever since they left Clavicus’s shrine. Lucy had heard the conversation Natsu had with the Daedric Prince, and she understood why he was upset. Even though Natsu had said he didn’t want to find his brother, it had to be part a lie. There was nothing worse than uncertainty. But Clavicus loved toying with mortals, and couldn’t be trusted. He’d tell any lies just for his own entertainment.

Natsu kicked the chest again, and to everyone’s surprise, it opened. Dumbfounded, the mage stood still and stared at the cloth and gold which dropped from the box as it turned over. Then he flashed a wide smile. Natsu picked up the piece of dark clothing to examine it under the Candlelight.

”Yes! New robes with magical enchantments, exactly what I hoped for! Can’t wait to get rid of these smelly College rags...”

Lucy furrowed her brow. ”How do you know they’re enchanted? They look like any robes to me.”

”These radiate magic”, the mage answered and turned the robe over so Lucy could see. She rose up and left the fire’s warmth to get a better look. She peeked over Natsu’s shoulder. A really faint light surrounded the robes, and if Lucy looked really close, she could see small symbols forming out of the light. ”Let me see, these robes… they help magicka regenerate faster and aid with destruction spells. As if it was made for me.”

Lucy didn’t know how the mage could tell that just looking at the ethereal runes. To Lucy, they said nothing. She nodded and crouched next to the open chest. Would there be something for her, too? Lucy picked another piece of clothing, but it was too large. The chest had belonged to a male. Maybe the other chest would contain something more fitting for Lucy. And as Natsu had said, she’d better wear armour until she could defend herself. Today had made it exceedingly clear. Her injuries would have been much worse without the leather armour.

”Who these people were?” Lucy asked. Something glimmered on the bottom of the chest. She reached out her hand and grabbed a chain of silver. A heavy amulet hung on it, adorned with a green stone. ”Is this enchanted, too?”

Ignoring her first question, Natsu took the amulet into his hand as Lucy hung it in the air. He analysed it precisely for a moment. ”It’s just a regular necklace, but you should keep it. We can sell it later. Might be valuable.”

Lucy had sold a lot of jewellery, and knew Natsu was right. However, she had hoped it would have been a magical one. The mage let go and the amulet swung back to Lucy. She let out a disappointed sigh.

”They might have been necromancers”, Natsu said suddenly. Lucy’s eyes flit from the jewel to him. ”They wear black, hooded robes like this, and they often raid burial sites to use jewellery in their rituals. That would explain this amount of gold, too. I thought about vampires at first, but vampires wouldn’t have any food with them. They drink blood, you know.”

Lucy blinked. Even though she didn’t really like necromancy, she’d rather cross paths with them than vampires. Vampires scared her. ”But what were necromancers doing here?”

”Probably came to ask something from Clavicus.”

Natsu collected the coins into a small purse. Maybe they could buy something enchanted with that amount of gold. Lucy glanced at him while he focused on collecting every piece from the chest and the ground. His hair was spiky and messy, and he kept wiping his locks from his eyes every now and then. He could use a haircut once they’d reach a town. The bruises on his cheeks made Lucy feel bad for him – they looked really painful. Why didn’t he use magic to heal himself? Lucy was sure he could heal his blackened eyes in a second.

A question dawdled on Lucy’s tongue. She had been wondering that alone since yesterday, but didn’t dare to ask. But now, as Clavicus had brought the subject back, she gathered her courage and let it out with a shaky voice,

”Did your brother have pink hair as you do?”

”No”, Natsu said straight up, shaking his head a bit. Dried troll blood formed black spots on his hair and forehead. ”His hair’s black as night. Why do you ask?”

The mage raised his gaze from the gold to hers. Lucy saw her own reflection in his large, dark-green eyes. Regretting her question, she lowered her head to avert his look.

”Just wondering… Many travellers passed through Helgen and visited our store. I thought that if he had hair like you I’d remember him...”

”Have you ever seen anyone with hair like me?”

Then Lucy realised the flaw in her logic. Her cheeks flared up in embarrassment. Gladly, Natsu’s Candlelight expired, hiding her blush in darkness. ”Well, not actually...”

Natsu chuckled. ”You’re not the first to point that out.”

Despite her awkwardness, she felt curious. Had felt since she saw him among the prisoners arriving Helgen. If she wasn’t the first to note his unusual hair colour, maybe he wouldn’t mind if she wanted to know more.

”Does one of your parents have pink hair?” Lucy asked. ”Or… is it a mix of red and fair hair?”

The mage shook his head again, seeming to be in slight discomfort. ”My brother had my father’s raven hair, but my mother’s was fair. Like yours. And there’s this thing, my mother, she… she was a bit ill from the head”, Natsu said and moved his knees closer to his chest, leaning into them. Bringing his hands under his chin, he squeezed his eyes closed. ”Damn, who am I lying to? My mom was fucking nuts. Mad as Sheogorath. Or not as much, but either way, she wasn’t alright.”

Lucy’s heart stung. She definitely didn’t want to bring up anything too painful, but too late now.

”What happened?” Lucy asked quietly and looked into Natsu’s eyes. He bit his lower lip but decided to tell the story anyway. He probably hadn’t told it too many times.

”When she found out she was expecting me, she flipped”, he started, sighing. ”The frost had ruined most of the crops, and it was going to be long and cold winter with less than half of their regular harvest. She was getting old and father already had Rockjoint. They already had my brother to feed, and mom thought we wouldn’t make it. So she tried to take fate into her own hands. She went to the nearest graveyard, picked a bunch of Nightshades and ate them.”

”Nightshades?” she gasped. Nightshade was generally known as a potent component of many poisons. ”How did… how did both of you survive?”

”By some miracle, I think. Or maybe fate had something planned for me. But when I was born the next summer, my hair was like this. The colour of the Nightshade.”

Lucy smiled at him, but her smile died fast. Though the story of his hair colour wasn’t happy by any means, it was unique, at least. Like him. Lucy remembered what Natsu had told yesterday, of his mother worrying herself to death. Yet bottomless worry truly took its toll, it rarely killed anyone.

”You said your mother died when you were just thirteen. Did her death have something with her… illness?”

Natsu was quiet awfully long.

”She stopped eating”, he whispered then. A voice any louder would reveal how close he was to cry. ”It took so fucking long for her to starve to death I was relieved when she finally died. It was… tough to watch. She looked like a Draugr in the end.”

Lucy’s stomach sunk with a pressuring ache spreading on her chest. She had never seen a Draugr, but she could imagine what starving to death looked like. She had lost her own mother in a matter of a few minutes. It had felt so horrible, it still did, but slow goodbyes wouldn’t be any less painful. Sudden death or not, losing a mother was always a tragedy for the child.

”I’m sorry.”

”You shouldn’t be”, Natsu consoled, faking a smile. ”It was five years ago, and I’m not sad about it… anymore. I think she’s finally at peace. She used to cry all the time after my brother stopped sending those letters. She didn’t even speak anymore, she just cried until her last breath.”

Natsu ran his fingers through his hair, nervously groping his neck. Lucy shivered as she realised why he had been so rude to her earlier, when she had cried over her dead parents. He couldn’t handle it when women cried because it reminded him of his own mother. Lucy did the quick math in her head, summing that Natsu was eighteen now. Only a year older than her, and he had already lived so much more. And the more Lucy knew, the more she felt like she shouldn’t envy him for that.

”What’s your brother’s name?” Lucy asked, gently switching the subject before the mood got too dark. ”You haven’t mentioned it at all.”

Natsu looked at her blankly for a moment, as if he had to dig the name from the depths of his memory.

”Zeref”, he said. ”His name is Zeref. I haven’t spoken his name in… years. They always talk about ’ _your brother did this and that back in his time_ ’ in the College, and so I’ve started to speak of him as ’my brother’. It’s like a taboo to say his name.”

Lucy nodded, understanding.

”How do you know he’s still alive if he has been missing for so many years?”

Natsu looked down, hiding his faint smile. ”He conjured a cat when he was still in College. Its name is Happy, and it’s a really nice cat. Everyone loves it. As long as the cat exists, it means he’s still alive. Usually conjured animals expire within a short time, but my brother, he’s the strongest mage I know. He has kept the cat’s gate open for six years and counting.”

Lucy’s eyed widened. Her tiny wolf had lived for half a minute before it dissolved, and she still hadn’t been able to summon it again. If Natsu’s brother was that powerful, how powerful would he be in ten years? He was already so skilled.

”Doesn’t the cat know where he is? Can it speak? Is it a Daedric cat?”

”No, unfortunately. It’s like any other cat, but a lot smarter. He keeps making little pranks to everyone. But I think it’s waiting for my brother to come back. He’s often on the roof, keeping an eye out for the bridge.”

Lucy couldn’t wait to reach the College. It seemed such a magical place. Lucy liked cats a lot, and couldn’t wait to meet Happy. A conjured cat? That had to be awesome.

”Why didn’t you take Clavicus’s offer?” she asked. It bothered her as well. _Why_ didn’t he want to know about his brother? Didn’t he want to see him ever again?

”He’s a liar. He turned a man into a troll, just to have fun. I wouldn’t believe a word he says”, Natsu answered reluctantly. He spun a coin in his fingers. ”That Molag Bal thing… that had to be a joke. My brother is too smart to meddle with the Daedra. He knows they’re up to no good. At least I hope he knows. You’re lucky you don’t have any siblings. They’re a pain in the ass.”

Lucy looked down and silenced for a moment. Natsu’s gaze lingered on her, telling he had realised he said something wrong.

”My parents were married for almost a decade before I was born”, Lucy started. ”They were so disappointed when I was a girl. While your mother tried to kill you in the womb, my parents desperately wanted more children. Boys, to be exact. The shop had passed down from father to son for generations, and I couldn’t help but feel that my parents would sell me for a son.”

”I don’t think any parent would. And even though my mother didn’t want to keep me at first, she still loved me. All mothers love their children. Even the insane ones.”

Lucy smiled a little, frowning. ”My mother wasn’t insane.”

”I didn’t mean -”

”I know. My mom, she was a good woman. I loved and adored her. My father, though, he was… a strict man. Sometimes I thought my mother would have let me leave for the College, but didn’t dare to say it. Father’s word was always stronger than hers.”

”Sounds familiar.” Natsu looked down into his hands. His fingers were thin and stained in dirt. When he pressed the coin into his fist, his veins came visible on the back of his hand. The sight reminded Lucy of her father, and his hard-working hands.

”You said your father is still alive”, Lucy said. ”Have you been in any contact with him?”

Natsu shook his head. ”I didn’t leave in very good terms. Well, I actually ran away, and the old man couldn’t catch me. Rockjoint made that bastard slow. But maybe I should visit him sometime. He has to be calmed down by now...”

”I’m sure he is.”

The mage raised his shoulders and fell silent. The silence lasted long enough to mark the conversation ended. Natsu stood up, stretching his limbs. The other chest remained unopened. They had completely forgotten about it.

”Do you have any lockpicks?”

* * *

  
Natsu didn’t know where Lucy had found lockpicks, or how she knew how to use them, but eventually, the other chest opened. By that time, his stomach rumbled from hunger. He was more than happy to see the box filled with bread, dried meat and bottles of mead. There were even honey-nut treats. Though he was a bit disappointed for not finding any riches, edible food was always more valuable. Even Erza approved their findings. She had been writing her notes all that time.

The mage carried the chest to the fireplace. Lucy spread her bedroll in front of the fire and Erza followed her example. Natsu picked up one bread and left the women to eat and rest. He wanted to change into fresh clothes before going to sleep, but first, he needed to clean up. Troll blood felt nasty on his skin.

While munching the bread, he searched for a kettle. He cast a Candlelight when he wandered too far from the fire, and could no longer see in the dark. The spell enlighted the cave and the built structures well enough. Natsu climbed on one of the wooden platforms. Rusty bloodstains had absorbed to the boards, and they creaked as he walked on them. There was a half-burned candle on the table, and Natsu lit it with a small touch of his fingertip.

Natsu’s eyes fixated on a thin book. A quill and an inkwell stood next to it, implying it was someone’s old journal. He put the rest of the bread to his mouth and picked up the book. To his surprise, it was empty. Only a date had been written to the upper corner of the first page. _17th of Last Seed, 4E 201._

”Hey, which day is it today?” Natsu hollered at the girls. He had lost the track of time. It happened often.

”19th of Last Seed”, Erza answered. ”Why?”

Natsu lowered his gaze back to the journal. These people had left two days ago, the same day Helgen got hit by a dragon. Then Natsu got an idea. He took the quill in his left hand, dipped it into the ink and began to write.

’ _Almost got executed in Helgen. A dragon saved my ass, but lost Igneel. Miss him. Found this girl, Lucy. She wants to be a mage. Going back to College with her.’_

Natsu looked at his handwriting and remembered why he hadn’t kept a journal. Igneel had documented their journey so far, but now his journal was Imperial property. Before the ink got to dry, Natsu messed it with his finger, knowing he wouldn’t have the time or patience to write about his days. When the day was done, all he wanted to do was sleep. Writing routines? Not for him.

”Lucy, are you a writer?” he asked. Erza had a notebook already, but Lucy didn’t. ”Here’s an empty journal if you want to keep it.”

From the distance, Natsu couldn’t read her expression. She kept a thinking pause. ”Okay”, she answered then. ”Leave it there, I’ll check it after I’ve eaten.”

Natsu nodded. He continued to search for a kettle so he could warm some water, but found only a wooden bucket. It sufficed, for he was too tired to keep searching. He put the clean clothes into the bucket. There had been an underground stream closer to Clavicus’s shrine, so Natsu headed there. He’d was himself in the stream, even though the water was frigid. Then he’d bring a bucketful of water to the girls, in case they wanted to clean up or have a drink.

The stream was so far away in the cave that Natsu didn’t even hear the girls’ voices when he found it. Gladly. He didn’t really like to strip in front of other people, especially women – unlike Gray. Without hesitating any further, he took off the fur cloak and slipped out of his robes. Already shivering, he released his feet from his boots and wool socks, dyed red with blood. He crouched by the running groundwater and filled the bucket. Then he braced himself by taking a deep breath, and poured the bucketful of icy cold water on himself.

”SHIT!” he screamed, shuddering. Frigid water ran down his naked skin causing a terrible, painful tingling. As fast as he could, he rubbed his scalp, hair and face, trying to wash away the blood. With his teeth chattering, he filled the bucket again. Already cursing, he rinsed his body once more. It felt like a being pricked by a thousand pins.

While jumping up and down from the cold, Natsu’s eyes caught something shiny in the stream. A strange warmth replaced the tingling. Natsu reached for the gleaming thing before the rushing waters took it away. He felt it with his fingers, recognising it as a ring. It had a purple stone implanted into it. Taking a better look under his Candlelight, he realised it was enchanted to significantly fortify one’s magicka. A treasure.

Natsu closed the ring into his fist and stepped out of the stream. He couldn’t feel his feet anymore. Quickly, he dried himself with his old rags before dressing into new underpants, robes and wool socks. He secured a belt around his waist and checked if his dagger was safely fastened. Natsu slid the ring into his pocket, filled up the bucket one more time and then headed back. The frigid wash made him drowsy, but otherwise, he felt surprisingly good. Refreshed, at least. Maybe in a little less pain.

The last discussion with Clavicus had made his blood boil. He hated it how the Daedra even dared to make such a joke, but talking to Lucy had calmed him down. Opening up about his past wasn’t usually the easiest thing to do. So far, Igneel had been the only person he had shared his family history with. _’Hey dumbass, why’s your hair like that?’_ Igneel had asked him the first time they talked. The Dark Elf kept teasing him about his hair colour for months, until Natsu had finally told him the truth.

Truth always brought people closer.

”I brought some water”, Natsu said when he was back in their camp. Only the warrior was sitting by the fire. Natsu glanced around and found Lucy writing that journal. He smiled inwardly. Back in Embershard mine’s storage room, Lucy had glanced through the books. Natsu had figured out she liked reading. Readers often liked to write, too.

Erza glared at his wet hair while drinking some mead. ”You washed your hair? You’ll freeze your brain.”

He grinned as a response. ”That damage is already done.”

Natsu put the water next to the fire, hoping it would warm up a bit. He spread his bedroll on the ground and sat down. His tense muscles relaxed in an instant, and his limbs started to feel heavy. Natsu took a bottle of mead and honey-nut treat from the chest. Usually, he didn’t like sweets, but now he was so hungry and tired he’d eat anything. He opened the bottle, took a sip and almost spit it out.

”Ugh, Nord mead”, he mumbled, closed the bottle and put it away. Nord mead with juniper was the only version he liked. ”That’s disgusting.”

”You mean delicious?” Erza smirked. Natsu hadn’t seen her smiling often. She was always so serious, but maybe mead helped her relax.

”Tastes like goat’s piss.”

”You’ve tasted some?”

Natsu snorted, not bothering to answer. He took a bite of the nut treat to hide the mead’s taste. Lucy was done with her journaling. She returned to them, carrying the notebook and the writing implements with her.

”Thanks for the water”, she said as she sat down. ”I don’t like mead either. Vilod, our neighbour, made mead with juniper berries. That was okay, but my parents didn’t let me drink too much. It wasn’t ladylike to drink.”

”Juniper mead was brewed in Helgen?” Natsu asked, and immediately realised what it meant. ”Damn...”

”Not ladylike to drink mead? Ha!” Erza laughed. Her voice grew louder the emptier her bottle became. ”They should have visited Jorrvaskar. Our heaviest drinker is a woman. No-one drinks as much as our Cana does. She’s always drunk.”

Natsu was secretly glad Lucy didn’t drink. He could never tell how a woman behaved when drunk, and his both eyes were already black. If he needed to have a strong drink and a fistfight with a woman to know her, he’d rather not know them at all. Luckily, Erza didn’t open another bottle.

”I’ll go check if the troll-man has kept his word”, the warrior said when her drink was finished. ”If he hasn’t, I’m going to punish him.”

Lucy chuckled silently but hid her mouth when Erza noticed her laughing. She dressed her steel armour back on with astonishing speed and left. Lucy filled the empty mead bottle with water and drank it whole, twitching her face at the aftertaste. Then she filled again and splashed some on her hair and forehead, to wash away the blood. She flinched from the cold.

”Don’t freeze your brain”, Natsu said, grinning. He took the bottle from her hand and warmed it with a flame before giving it back. ”Here.”

”Thanks.”

Natsu watched as she washed the rusty stripes from her collarbone-lenght hair, and revealed her fair skin under the dirt and blood. The injuries had left only faint bruises behind. They would fade in a day or two. The mage put his hands into the pockets, and felt the cool silvery ring in his fingers. He had almost forgotten about it.

”Hey, Lucy”, he started and pulled his hand back, keeping the ring tight in his fist. Tempted to keep it himself, he almost retreated from saying what he was going to – but when he looked at Lucy, he knew it was the right thing to do. Lucy put the bottle down, and Natsu opened his fingers. ”I found this while I gathered water. It’s strongly enchanted. Fortifies magicka. You should take it.”

Before Lucy even answered, Natsu tossed the ring to her. Awestruck, Lucy caught it by a reflex. The girl stared at him in loss of words.

”But… But… Don’t you want to have it?” she asked.

”You need it more. It’ll help you cast more spells.”

Lucy smiled as an answer and put the ring in her right index finger.

”Want to summon a wolf?" Natsu asked. "Let’s see if that thing’s any good.”

One could never have too many friends in Skyrim.

* * *

**A/N: The cave they're chilling at:**

**Hi guys! Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think :)**

**And Natsu didn't propose her with that ring thing, that was purely platonic (at least for now haha :D). Skyrim's wedding and marriage traditions differ a lot from ours. A person looking for a marriage wears an amulet of Mara to show that they're available, and so on. They only get matching rings after they've been married.**


	9. GATHERING STORM

Two ghostly wolves jogged down the rocky mountain path. One of them was slightly smaller than the other, but equally graceful and strong. Their paws left no marks on the freshly-fallen snow. The white veil was first broken by their creators, who followed right behind their familiars. The sight made Lucy’s heart burst from pride. Not that she had been able to conjure a full-grown wolf, but that it had existed for few minutes as well. There had been many dogs in Helgen, and if she listened closely, her wolf sounded just like a dog. Until it howled.

The mountain pass was coming to an end. Lucy felt her toes again, for the temperature rose as the stone walls around them lowered. Full-grown pines replaced the dry scrubs, and from some spots of the path, Lucy could see the autumn colours of the Rift blazing in the horizon. After yesterday’s storm, she welcomed the warmth with open arms.

Natsu’s wolf was the first to expire. Suddenly, it let out a tiny whimper and dissolved into the crispy midday air, leaving nothing behind. Lucy’s halted, looking to its side where its companion had just been. Timidly putting its ears back, it vanished as it followed Natsu’s wolf into Oblivion.

”Good job, Lucy!” the mage cheered, smiling. Lucy answered his smile – in fact, she was already smiling.

Lucy had been too exhausted to wield the magicka ring properly when they tested it yesterday. She had been able to summon a tiny pup and cast a little flame, but that was pretty much it. After a relatively good night’s sleep, she understood how to link the enchanted magic to her own. With Erza’s approval, they had trained since they left the cave this morning. The sun had climbed higher on the sky, and those hours had felt like minutes to Lucy. Excitement made her heart race in her chest, the fast process almost pushing her nightmares aside.

”How should I use a familiar in a battle?” Lucy asked. She had to wait for a while for her magicka to recover until she could use it again. While Natsu could cast several spells in a row before exhausting himself, Lucy felt drained after a single summon. She looked at the mage, and couldn’t wait to wear robes like him. She didn’t feel too comfortable in leather armour, but she knew it kept her safe.

”Cast it when you first see an enemy”, Natsu answered, gazing into the distance. They had already passed the highest point of the mountain road. Walking downhill made Lucy’s shins ache. ”If you’re lucky, it will scare them away. Even if it won’t, it will attack and distract the enemy, giving you time to prepare your bow. If I was you, I’d stick to a ranged battle. If you charge at the enemy with a flame spell, you’ll find yourself right in their arms, all out of magicka, and your weapon out of reach. You know how it will end.”

Lucy nodded, gulping. She had tried ranged battle yesterday, and it hadn’t ended too well. First, her arrow had almost hit the back of Natsu’s head. Second, she had been surprised from behind. She’d never leave her blind spot uncovered again. However, the strategy Natsu offered her sounded logical. She’d better keep distance to the next enemy they would encounter, but Lucy hoped they would be out of the mountains before that happened. The cold made her fingers shaky.

”Should I have a dagger, too?” Lucy asked. She had been in awe when Natsu had killed the troll with his dagger. For a moment, she had just stared at the troll’s blood spraying on his face, forgetting everything else.

”Maybe”, the mage said, feeling his blade was still in place. ”We’ll find you one. It’s handy if you get too close to an enemy. It’s fast to grab, unlike a bow, but it’s no use if you’re against someone with a greatsword. Or a warhammer. Damn, I hate warhammers...”

”Got hit by any?”

Natsu grinned. ”Dropped one on my leg. Had an ugly bruise for months.”

Lucy wondered if Natsu ever had a moment when he _didn’t_ have a bruise or a cut somewhere. She had known him only for a few days but had already seen how he drawn he was to danger and injury. Like a luna moth attracted to a candle, but never too close to the flame. Having his execution cancelled due to the first dragon attack in centuries? That man had insane luck. Lucy was glad some of his luck had reached to her, too.

”Did you have some bad dreams again?” Natsu asked, waking Lucy from her thoughts. She blinked as she realised she had been unintentionally staring at the mage. Already guessing why he asked, she turned her head away, ashamed of herself. She had been screaming again in her sleep.

”I had…” she admitted shyly, her voice dying as the dream surfaced her mind. ”It was of the woman I... killed in... in Embershard mine. She came back to haunt me. Just when I thought I’d escaped her, I ran to a troll. The dream ended when it tore me in half.”

The terrors of the last days crept into her dreams. Lucy forced herself to stay brave and strong during the daytime. Most of the time she felt almost fine. The key was not to think about what had happened yesterday and focus on surviving today. _’_ _Maybe those things didn’t even happen._ _All of that was just a bad dream_ _. Maybe I just ran away and my parents are waiting for me at home...’_ Even though she knew she was lying to herself, those lies kept her sane. She could grieve her losses when they’d finally reach the College’s safe ground.

”Don’t you have nightmares?” Lucy asked when the mage didn’t say anything.

He shrugged. ”Not anymore. But used to. They stopped when I hit my head pretty hard. Fell down the stairs.”

Lucy furrowed her brows in slight disbelief. ”Sounds great”, she said, despite her doubts. Falling on his head, that she believed. He had a scar in his forehead, blending into his hairline, proving it had truly happened. But not having any nightmares? When she had conjured her wolf for the first time, Natsu had talked about Igneel in his sleep. He hadn’t sounded too happy.

”Don’t try it”, Natsu chuckled but switched the subject quickly. ”But let’s try this. Grab your bow.” Lucy had noticed yesterday that he asked about her dreams, but didn’t carry the conversation any further. Maybe he cared, but didn’t know how to help. Maybe distracting her was his way to help, or maybe he didn’t want to bring up his own dreams.

The mage halted, prompting Lucy to do the same before he conjured a flame atronach ahead of them. A woman-shaped figure made entirely from fire hovered above the ground, idly waiting for something to happen. Lucy didn’t really like where that was going. The last time Natsu had used his atronachs in training, he had pissed off a bear. Though there were no signs of bears in the mountain pass, Lucy didn’t want to encounter any more trolls. But she did as he told, reaching for her bow and arrows. _’I asked him to be my teacher, after all, so here goes...’_

”Hold the bow in one hand and summon a familiar with your free hand. My flame guy will attack your wolf, and while they’re at it, you shoot at the atronach.”

Lucy released the bow from the straps on her back and picked up one arrow from the quiver. She gathered them in her right hand, careful not to drop them. Glancing over her shoulder, she checked if Erza was okay with their training. The warrior walked far behind them, but Lucy could still see the frown on her face. But Erza wouldn’t hit _her_ if something happened, wouldn’t she? She’d rather not have a black eye. She didn’t know how to use restoration magic, yet.

”What if that thing attacks me after it’s done with my wolf?” she asked with a meek voice which made her realise her lack of confidence. A bad feeling churned in her stomach.

”I’ll banish it back to Oblivion before it can hurt you. Go ahead. Nothing will go wrong. I train with my atronachs all the time. It’s not like they mind a little horseplay.”

Hesitantly, Lucy called for the wolf in her mind before collecting magic in her left hand. Building the connection to Oblivion was harder now, for half of her focus was on holding the bow. Purple light sparked on her palm, circling for a moment before she cast in front of her. A gate formed from the light, letting an ethereal wolf enter the world. It barked as a greeting. Was it the same familiar every time? Lucy didn’t know, but she liked to think it was. Should she give it a name?

”Go, Plue!” she shouted, pointing at the fire atronach. It was just a random name, but she liked it. Upon her command, the wolf bolted forward. With her hand freed, she nocked an arrow and drew the string to her cheek. She was growing used to the strength the bow required, but it gave her very little time to aim until her arm tired. Lucy released, and missed her target miserably.

”Plue?” Natsu wondered while he looked at the wolf. The beast grabbed the atronach’s arm between its jaws, fangs tearing into the flames. Lucy ignored Natsu’s comment as she grabbed another arrow. Realising she had forgotten her stance, she positioned her feet and prepared to draw. She released. The string gave a vigorous slap on her arm, but the arrow found the atronach’s chest. The floating creature spun around from the impact, and the happy rush of success made Lucy forget the pain.

Lucy stole a glance of Natsu. He leaned his weight on his left leg with hands shoved in pockets, seeming a bit too relaxed, considering they were training with Daedric creatures. Starting to draw another arrow, she heard her wolf’s whimpers as the atronach shot a fireball at it. Her fingers turned sloppy, and the arrow slipped from her hands as her familiar was caught in an explosion.

”Damn”, she mumbled, lowering her gaze to see the arrow at her shoes.

Right before she crouched to pick it up, the mage shouted, ”Watch out!” and swooped at her, pushing her out of a fireball’s way with his body. She dropped the bow, shielding her face with her hands. The fireball exploded right where she had been a second ago, and Lucy screamed as the pressure wave threw them further into the snow.

Lucy peeked through her fingers as Natsu rolled back on his feet to restore his balance. The flame atronach swung its arm back, ready to throw another fireball at her. He stood up to protect her from the angered Daedra. ”Bad flame boy, bad!” he yelled, and banished the creature before it caused any more harm. Lucy exhaled heavily, her heartbeat recovering from the spike of adrenaline. She should have listened to her intuition.

Natsu turned around, his face flushing white as he saw the Companion behind them. From his mere expression, Lucy could tell Erza wasn’t happy.

”Sorry!” Natsu shouted at the warrior, like _she_ was the one who needed an apology. A long, scary silence was her answer, enough to let the two know the training was over for today. Lucy helped herself back on her feet, wiping the snow off her leathers. She stared at the mage under her brows as she collected her bow, glad to see it wasn’t damaged. ”Sorry about that”, Natsu finally mumbled as he noticed Lucy’s blaming glare.

”You’re the worst teacher ever”, Lucy muttered under her breath while securing the bow back in her back.

Natsu just cocked his head, grinning. ”Told you so.”

Lucy wanted to say something more, but Erza’s stern voice interrupted her.

”Okay, idiots, look at those pillars”, the warrior pointed forward with her sword. Lucy tilted her head to see two tall colums framing the road, forming a gateway of sort. Their tops were carved in the shape of an eagle’s head. The landmark was built by ancient Nords, marking the end of the mountain road. ”We’ll be in Rift soon enough. We’ll be stopping at the abandoned alchemist’s shack by the road, but only briefly. We’ll be in Ivarstead at nightfall if we hurry.”

Lucy’s eyes brightened. An alchemist’s shack? She hoped there would be books of alchemy she could read, or even a lab she could test. She had collected some mountain flowers and snowberries, maybe she could make a potion from them. Natsu would surely help her, would he? He had his own way of doing things, but Lucy had a feeling he wasn’t as _bad_ as she let him know. Alchemy couldn’t be as dangerous as playing with atronachs.

”Let’s keep going, then”, Natsu said, adjusting his backpack before running downhill. Lucy followed him, and when she passed the stone pillars, the tightness in her throat eased. They were out of the mountains, and still alive. Though she was physically exhausted, the thought of a warm bed kept her going. If everything went right, they could spend the next night in an inn.

Only if everything went right.

\---

Erza sighed when her travelling companions began their alchemy experiments like two small, overjoyed children. That’s how she referred to them in her mind – children she had to watch over. She had promised to escort them through the mountain route, and she was glad having kept that promise. The trolls would have been the blonde girl’s undoing, at least, if not the mage’s too. And now, when the mountains were already behind them, Erza was unsure what to do next.

The alchemist’s shack was a small, run-down house, providing very little shelter with glassless windows and a broken roof. Gladly, the weather was pleasant, warm even. Sun shone from a cloudless sky, enchanting the autumn colours all around them. There was a garden behind the building. Half of its herbs were for healing, and the other half would kill a giant. An alchemy lab stood next to the wooden wall, already occupied by a curious girl and her haphazard teacher.

If she left them on their own, Erza doubted they would make it to the College. It was her job to protect and help the people of Skyrim. Leaving them on their fates would be against her moral. Even though she preferred to travel alone, it was no longer safe. Bears and trolls and bandits she could fight, but what about a dragon? What would her sword alone do to a flying, overgrown lizard? Those two had more experience of dragons than her. She had never even seen one. They had – and they had lived.

Maybe she should stick with them a little longer.

Their joyful chatter faded as Erza withdrew into her own thoughts. She leaned against a birch and raised her eyes to the sky, wiping her bright red hair from her face. While her female fellows kept their hair tightly braided, Erza liked to keep hers free most of the time. She only braided it when she knew she was going to a battle. Seeing the crimson strands on the edges of her vision reminded her of the one who added _’Scarlet’_ to her name.

_Jellal._

Her original plan had been to reach the alchemist’s shack yesterday evening and spend the night there. For _particu_ _l_ _a_ _r_ _reasons_ , she had fallen behind her travel schedule, but gladly the meeting was arranged for this afternoon anyway. She wasn’t running late yet. He didn’t appreciate any delays, or worse, misses. If Erza’s schedule was tight, his was twice as bad. Because of the nature of his job, their meetings were kept brief. Assassins were busy these days.

Erza wanted to slap herself every time she remembered the career of choice of the man her heart had chosen.

”I’ll be gone for a moment”, Erza said, her words going for deaf ears. ”And please, do not destroy anything.”

”Yeah, whatever”, the mage mumbled as he crammed more mountain flowers into the distiller. Lucy didn’t even hear her as Natsu continued to tell about the properties of their chosen ingredients.

Erza shrugged, quickly turning away. Due to certain conflicts between their ways of life, Jellal and her had appointed several different meeting places all across Skyrim. The shack was one of them, but they had a backup place in case the first had any extra pairs of eyes nearby. And there were almost always extra eyes. How much she hoped she could just bring him to Jorrvaskr, introduce him to her friends, take him to her own bed, but no. She belonged to the Circle, a faction of the Companions consisting the highest-ranking and the most respected members of the guild. What would they think of her if they knew about her little connection with the Brotherhood?

But as a Circle member, she had grown used to having some secrets.

Her ’troll check’ last night had been only a cover. Jellal’s conjured owl worked as their personal courier, and she had gone outside just in case the bird would appear. It was a habit she had formed past the years, even though Jellal didn’t send letters too often. But when he did, it made her happy, despite having to burn the letters immediately after reading them. One time Aela caught her in the night at Skyforge and asked why she was smiling. Erza had lied, answering that her childhood friend from Cyrodiil sent her a letter. Jellal had told his parents he’d be off to the Imperial City when he left home nearly a decade ago. That’s where they still believed their son was.

They had been in contact a week ago when Erza had found and brought the Dragonstone to Farengar, Whiterun’s court wizard. As Farengar had deemed, the Dragonstone was a map of the ancient dragon burial mounds. The court wizard had been studying the dragon lore for the past few years, but until this day it had been hit-and-miss. A hint of a treasure hidden in Bleak Falls Barrow got his study moving. He needed a brute to go search for it, and Erza picked the job mostly for her own reasons. Or, Jellal’s reasons - had his own investigation going on as well, and Erza trusted him more capable to solve the mysteries of dragons.

Erza had informed Jellal of the discovery and sent him a copy of the map. He had a contract in Riften around that time, and he told he’d check the burial sites of that area before heading back home. Erza planned to go straight to Kynesgrove after she had completed another job, but the plan changed when she was returning Whiterun. The city gates were closed, and she almost had to bribe her way past the guards. The word spread like wildfire. By the evening everyone from Solitude to Riften knew Helgen had been burned to the ground. Not due to the civil war, but due to a dragon. Erza had sensed the panic in the air as if the entire Skyrim was holding her breath.

Jellal contacted her the following morning, asking her to change her route. She’d go through Helgen, look for any clues, and meet him before going to Kynesgrove. Clues she had found indeed, the most important of them being the fire wizard and his newfound apprentice. _’If they just could personally tell Jellal what they witnessed that day… ’_

An autumn wind swayed the trees around her as she walked across the forest. Colourful leaves rained down, dancing in a whirl before covering the grass. Erza stopped briefly to inhale the calming, earthy smell. It reminded her of harvest. She let her eyes soak in the beauty of nature as little birds chirped their song on the branches above her. Finally, a moment of peace.

The meeting place was a near a giant’s kettle off the road, sheltered behind a spruce at least a century old. Her heart raced in her chest and butterflies fluttered in her stomach the closer she got. While their relationship was full of hardships, the anticipation of a new meeting felt always as precious. A silent scoff of a horse sounded in the air, sending shivers down Erza’s spine.

In the tree’s shades sat a man in dark robes. A black, noble stallion stood behind him, scooping the ground with its hoof. Jellal’s head tilted slightly towards her as she appeared, his features hiding under a large hood. He didn’t greet her. It wasn’t his style.

”Who were those?” he asked. Erza pinched her brows. As she had guessed, he had been watching them. Jellal was that kind of a person who could see everyone while no-one could see him. No-one in the village wanted to play hide-and-seek with him when they were kids. If he was the seeker, he found everyone immediately. If he was the hider, he stayed hidden until nightfall, and his father had to go calling for him to come back home.

”Survivors from Helgen”, Erza answered as she sat down on a rock next to him. ”They’re on their way to Winterhold. I escorted them through the mountain pass.”

Jellal nodded, not giving any further questions.

”Ironic, isn’t it. A dragon appears when we make the first significant discovery. And how come it be… the burial sites of the east were all empty.”

”Empty?”

He lifted his gaze from the glacial pothole to her, revealing the tattoo around his right eye. It had adorned his face since early childhood. Growing up in the small village of Rorikstead, he had always gained a lot of attention for his tattoo, as well as his bright-blue hair. Now, he made sure those prominent features stayed in the shades. Only a single blue strand showed under his hood.

”Yes. It wasn’t just a single dragon. There’s more of them out there now. As the prophecy says, the dragons are coming back to life. Something is _bringing_ them back. But I have no idea what that could be. There’s no conjurer in this land capable of raising a dragon from the dead.”

When she had been a child, an elder of their village had told them the story of the world’s end. The prophecy had occupied Jellal’s mind since childhood. While it had intrigued him, it had frightened her. Back in the wheat fields of Rorikstead, when the folklore of an impending apocalypse had scared Erza out of her wits, Jellal had promised her that wouldn’t happen. He’d keep her safe even if he had to stand in between her and the one trying to end the world.

Her heart had clung onto that promise all these years.

”I thought so”, Erza whispered grimly, recalling the conversation she had with Natsu and Lucy the day before yesterday. ”And with no Dragonborn around, we have no hope to defeat them.”

Jellal’s eyes grew grim. He had Imperial ancestry and very little faith in Nord legends, or according to his own words, _Nord nonsense_. Despite being raised by his family, Erza never abandoned the beliefs of her own people. In ancient Nord lore, Dragonborn was a mortal man or a woman born with the blood and the soul of a dragon. Able to absorb a slain dragon’s soul, a Dragonborn was the only one who could permanently kill a dragon.

”We don’t know that yet. Anyone could be a Dragonborn without knowing. Even you, dear.”

The man chuckled.

”I doubt that. What matters is that the dragons are real. There will be more of them. Who knows if the skies will be swarming of dragons soon? Now that they are real, we need to find a way to slay them. That’s our next step.”

Erza shook her head, trying to cast away the image of a thousand dragons covering the sun. She was scared, but couldn’t afford to show it.

”Don’t you want to know what the survivors had to say?” Erza asked. ”They might know something important.”

”Those kids? All I need to know is that there was complete devastation. It will be the fate of every city and settlement if we can’t stop whatever is going on. Nothing but ashes will remain of the world as we know it.”

The warrior zoned out for a moment, staring into the pothole front of them. There was water on the bottom of it, glimmering in the sunlight. Fear strangled her throat, but she swallowed her childhood nightmare, clinging at their mutual decision to prevent that from becoming reality.

Erza raised her eyes to Jellal’s. ”What’s our next step?”

”The burial mounds have been emptied in a systematic order, at regular intervals of time. If my calculations are correct, the next would be Kynesgrove. Whatever is happening to the dragons, you should find out there. Be sure to report me as soon as you get to know.”

She nodded. Jellal took her hand into his, gently stroking her fingers with his own. 

”Where are you going now?”

”Home, to receive my payment”, Jellal answered, evoking bitterness in Erza’s heart, knowing he’d never call Rorikstead his home again. ”So many contracts, so little time...”

Erza smirked. ”You have people to kill, my dear. Best get to it.”

There was no changing him. Even though she sometimes hoped Jellal would have joined the Companions like her, she couldn’t blame him in the end. Jorrvaskr wasn’t a place for a man so extraordinary as him.

The warrior sniffled, the fast departure making her emotional. And with that sniff, she smelled something strange, like burning herbs. Jellal noticed that too.

”What’s that smoke?” Jellal asked. Erza turned her head towards the direction it came from. The alchemist’s shack was that way. She realised immediately what was going on. Would she ever get a damn break?

”Un – _fucking-_ surprising”, she cursed and stood up. She gave a quick kiss on Jellal’s cheek, and left running. After a few seconds, she looked back, her heart sinking to her stomach.

Jellal was already gone, and the coldness returned to her world.

* * *

**A/N: The stone gate, scenery in the Rift and the Alchemist's Shack!**

  
  


**Hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**I tried doing Erza’s POV to get some variety and depth to the story. It's time to dive into the lore before shit gets real. Got a little glimpse of Jellal, too! Natsu and Lucy are just messing around as usual, but I think they'll start to get more serious too, soon. Otherwise, this story will be just going from one trouble to the second. There will be a few more peaceful chapters after this before the first major turning point in the story.**

**And for those looking for NaLu, it's gonna be a rocky road, and slow burn as hell. There will be little moments sprinkled all across the story though :) I also noticed that I have used the phrase ”what the hell” for a few times, but then I realised that Skyrim doesn’t really have the term ”hell”. There’s no hell in any pantheons and I don’t think the word was used in the game at all, so I’m not going to use that anymore. But I’ll leave the previous hells there for I don’t bother changing them. I’ll be using ”what in the Oblivion” for now on I think :D**

**Thanks for every comment and kudos, all feedback has made me really happy <3**


	10. IVARSTEAD

”You blew up the fucking lab!”

”You said to put more snowberries into it!”

”I didn’t mean _that_ much!”

”You obviously weren’t clear enough!”

Lucy jumped back as the lab sparkled and smoked. Shatters of green glass lied on the ground. The dish had exploded from the excess steam building up inside of it. Natsu had intended to brew a potion of frost resistance from snowberries and mountain flowers, but the warming components had obviously overheated. A cloud of black smoke rose from the remains of the alchemy table, floating into the forest with the wind.

”Gods…” Lucy sighed, coughing the smoke from her lungs. ”You know any water or ice magic, genius? We really gotta fix this before Erza comes back.”

Natsu crossed his arms on his chest, staring into the flames with a grin. ”Who do you think I am? Gray? And it’s not like she’ll come back yet. She obviously went to take a dump, and she can’t get out of her amour that fast -”

Lucy stepped on a sparkle which flew from the lab, preventing the fire from spreading. ”Ugh, quit it! Just put down the fire! You’re the wizard here.”

The mage rolled his eyes and grunted. While Lucy viewed the accident as a catastrophe, Natsu didn’t seem too bothered about it. If his eyes weren’t already blacked, Lucy would have punched him, too. He recklessness started to get on her nerves a bad time.

”Natsu!” Lucy shouted and kicked him closer to the flames, urging him to solve the mess.

Natsu lifted his hands in mock surrender. ”Okay, okay, fine, calm down, just let me -”

”I LEFT YOU BRATS ALONE FOR FIVE. DAMN. MINUTES!”

Lucy shrieked and cringed, her eyes widening as the warrior emerged from the forest. Even Natsu startled and opened his mouth in shock to form some words of defence. Erza didn’t give him a chance to explain as she marched to them, bustling in choler and frustration.

”How can you be this careless… By Ysmir, step away, now!” she yelled. Erza tore the waterskin from Natsu’s belt and poured it on the smouldering lab.

”Hey, that’s my water -”

”Shut up! Lucy, give me yours, too.”

Lucy handed her waterskin to the warrior without a second’s hesitation. Gladly, it was enough to put out the flames before they spread any further. Why didn’t they realise they had water attached to their goddamn belts? They had just stood there like two children after a backfired prank. Lucy’s shoulders tensed as Erza grabbed the mage from his hood, pulling him inside the shack. _’I’ve seen this before...’_ she thought, a bad feeling building up in her chest.

”What’s … what is wrong with you!?” Erza yelled at him, the wooden walls mildly muffling her voice. The frustrated stutter revealed she was losing her composure. Gritting her teeth, Lucy pressed her nails into her palms as she listened, unable to do anything else. ”Are you actually _this_ stupid? Did your… did your mother drop you as a baby or something!?”

Natsu lifted his shoulders, the damned smirk not leaving his lips. ”Maybe? I mean, I can’t remember...”

She had been in a situation like this many times in her childhood. Her friend, the lumberjack’s son named Haming always took the scapegoat’s role whenever they did something bad together. Like the time when they fed nails to the chickens. It had been Lucy’s stupid idea, but Haming claimed it as his fault, saving her from the trouble. Torolf, Haming’s father was usually a laid-back and funny man, but there was nothing funny when Lucy listened outside as his yelling echoed all across Helgen.

Were they alive anymore? She had seen Haming running past the store that morning, but she had no idea if they made it out of Helgen. If Lucy remembered right, their house had been crushed under the debris. A lump formed in her throat, so she shook her head to cast the memory away from her mind.

Erza didn’t approve the mage’s playfulness a single bit. ”You’re going to get her killed!” she shouted, making him wince. She was serious and wanted him to know it. ”I – I can’t supervise you all the fucking time, and when I turn my eyes for a goddamn second, you’ve already gotten her into danger!”

The mage cocked his head. ”Hey, it’s not like she’s a damsel in distress. Man, the first time she held an ax, she shoved it into a bandit chief’s skull. She can -”

”She’s… she’s not like your friend, Natsu! Not someone you can just mess around with! Where’s that Igneel fella now anyway? Did you get him killed, too? ”

Lucy gulped as silence fell. Her gaze moved from the alchemy lab to the window. The shutters were open, allowing her to see inside. Her heart dropped when her eyes found the mage. Natsu stared down with fists clenched into tight fists. Lucy realised Igneel had been there too when those two had first met – and Erza had no idea what had happened to him in Helgen. 

”I’m right, am I?” Erza asked lacking the tiniest bit of compassion. ”Get a damn grip, mage. You said you can protect her, but you clearly can’t! You can barely look after yourself. You’re the worst possible company for her. She deserves better than being dragged to an early grave by you!”

Natsu raised head to face Erza’s blaming stare, and Lucy flinched. Anger sparkled in his eyes like fiery embers. Lucy stepped back, afraid of the mage’s answer, already knowing it would be bad. She hadn’t seen his buttons pushed like this before. The whole man changed into a choleric, blazing vessel of rage, as if he’d turn into a flame atronach himself. His fists shivered as he tried to keep from exploding.

”I should take you to the Jarl, after all”, the warrior scoffed. ”He’ll know better what to do with you, because I don’t fucking know. I’ve had enough.”

Natsu shoved away the armoured hand about to grab his robes again. ”Get off me, bitc… beast!” he spat out. Biting his tongue, he changed the slur at the last second. His respect was slipping away. Erza glared at him as he backed away, fully aware of what he intended to say. She reached for her sword when the first flames sparked in Natsu’s hands, ready to clash with him once again. Except that this time they wouldn’t be fighting with their bare fists.

”You want to get rid of me?” Natsu asked, his voice scarily low. ”Why bother the busy Jarl? Do it yourself, o’ honourable Companion.”

Erza drew a part of her sword out of the sheath, as the last warning to not cross her lines. Instead of intimidating the mage into submission, it agitated his anger. Lucy raised her hands over her mouth. Neither of them seemed to remember she was there watching.

”It’s a part of my job to track down escaped criminals and kill them”, the Companion told, ignoring the mage’s mock. ”As a Helgen survivor, you’re too valuable to waste like that, but too dangerous to be left free to wander, and lead innocent maidens at death’s door.”

Natsu grinned, still not admitting his fault. ”Did you fucking forget what I’ll tell them if you arrest me?”

Erza sighed and drew her sword. ”By the order of the Jarl, stop right there! You’ve committed crimes against Skyrim and her people. What say you in your defence?”

Lucy cringed in shock. Could she be _that_ serious? Guards used that line when they arrested people, giving the person one last chance to make up for their mistake. The options were scarce. You could go to jail, pay off your bounty, or die at the guard’s sword. Lucy didn’t know if what Natsu had said was true, but if it was, Erza’d be a fool.

The grin escaped the mage’s face. ”I’d rather die than go to prison”, he said, enveloping his fists in flames.

’ _I have to step in before someone gets hurt.’_

”Stop it, both of you!” Lucy shouted as she bursted to the shack, causing their heads to tilt towards her. ”It was my fault! I told him to add more snowberries into it, and it overboiled! Please, don’t hurt each other!”

She panted heavily for she had held her breath since Erza mentioned Natsu’s friend. The mage and the warrior stared at her, their clash interrupted. Flames died in Natsu’s hands, but Erza was the first to open her mouth.

”Don’t you realise how much trouble this mage has given you already? If you want to go to the College, let me escort you there. I -”

Lucy shook her head rapidly. ”No!”

”He’s a criminal, Lucy”, Erza said and glanced at the mage. ”I made a mistake trusting he would’ve changed, but so did you if you saw him in the execution line. Why’d you ever stick with him? Did you even know why he was going to the block?”

”I would have died if not for him!” Lucy raised her voice, afraid to stand against the Companion she idolised. This time she just could not stand back and watch them fight over such a stupid thing. ”He saved me that day. He might have broken a few laws, but he’s not a bad man!”

”I don’t want you to end up dead, like his -”

”The damn Imperials killed his friend! I watched as they chopped his head off, so shut up about that already!”

Lucy saw from the corner of her eye as Natsu shuddered, turning his face away. He stared at the alchemist’s storage cabinets as if the dried leaves and flowers suddenly became the most interesting thing in his world.

”I just… I just want all of us to get along. I… I hate it when my friends fight!”

As warm drops rolled down her cheeks, she realised she was crying. Natsu turned towards her with eyes widened, the anger in him switched into something Lucy couldn’t understand. Erza let go of the hilt of her sword, her tension easing as she reached to Lucy. Lucy closed her eyes, feeling a hand of cold steel touching her shoulder. Fading steps sounded in the room as Natsu left the shack, driven away by her tears.

”I… I can’t join the College if… if I can’t use any magic… So I asked him to… teach me”, Lucy spoke between her quiet sniffles as she tried to held her emotions back. ”I… I really… want to be a… a mage, so please… do not arrest him or…”

”Lucy, it’s okay. I... overreacted”, Erza consoled, rubbing her shoulder.

Something rattled outside the shack. Lucy realised it was Natsu, picking up his stuff in haste. ”Where’s… where’s he going?” she wondered in worry. She didn’t want him to leave until everyone would be in a better mood. Conflicts left a hollow, heavy feeling in her chest until the quarrel had been reconciled.

The mage said nothing, so Erza called his name. ”Natsu?”

”Off to Ivarstead”, he answered from a distance. He was already on his way.

”We’ll see you there. I hope you’ve calmed down by then.”

”Whatever.”

Lucy wanted to tell him to stay, but knew it would be a bad idea. He needed a moment to rewind, and Erza needed too. Maybe a little time separated would be better for both of them. Lucy could do one afternoon without training. She had had enough for the day. Wiping her face, she collected herself. Being the mediator in people's fights was exhausting.

Erza led Lucy out of the shack to catch some fresh air. ”I thought I’d scare some sense into his head, but it kinda backfired.”

”Kinda? You pissed him off bad time”, Lucy sighed as she sat down on the grass. She glanced at the alchemy lab, pitying its fate. Many travelling alchemists had used it appropriately before them, but now it was no use to anyone.

”I can’t let him destroy everything he touches. This can’t continue. He has to learn some discipline. Self-discipline, to be exact.”

Lucy muffled a chuckle, knowing it would be easier to teach a goat to dance than teach Natsu to behave.

”You really should apologise to him”, Lucy said. ”Bringing up his friend was tasteless, even though you didn’t know he's dead.”

Erza sighed. ”I know.”

Something else than a smoking alchemy lab had upset her first. Lucy knew Erza would have just ignored their mess unless something was already bothering her. However, she didn’t want to intrude. Erza would tell her once she’d trust her enough.

”He would have won that fight”, Erza admitted after a moment of silence. ”I can beat him in a brawl, but what can I do against his magic? What can steel do fire? Nothing. And what could my sword to a fire-breathing dragon? Less than nothing, it would melt in a second. Even though most of us Nords won’t admit it, we need people like him. We have to fight fire with fire.”

A flash of memories entered Lucy’s mind. Erza’s face faded into the flames and smoke and flying stone. Screams of terror and agony echoed in her head once again, making her legs tremor in fear. She still remembered the unreal feeling striking through her heart when the dragon’s shade covered the entire plaza as it flew by. _Gods, let this be only a nightmare_ , everyone had thought, but reality grabbed that hope from the throat and laughed. _Yes, a real nightmare._

Fighting fire with fire? The dragon had landed on the watchtower, and that insanely brave idiot had shot a fireball at it. And what had it done? Nothing.

”What can humans even do to a dragon?” Lucy whispered, hearing her own voice as if underwater. Slowly, the flames turned into autumn leaves as she returned to the present moment. Her eyes locked with Erza. She hadn’t answered her question. Lucy focused on her face, pushing memories from Helgen aside. Was _Erza_ shivering?

The warrior turned away, leaving the question lingering in the air.

”We should get moving”, Erza said. ”We’ll be in Ivarstead before the fire wizard if we leave now.”

* * *

Lucy found no words to express her gratitude when she and Erza had reached Ivarstead. It had been an early evening when the sun was just about to hide behind the Throat of the World. People were just finishing their workdays and going to their homes, just like another ordinary day. Seeing a glimpse of a normal life brought Lucy’s heart to peace. Life carried on as usual outside Helgen’s ruins – the dragon hadn’t destroyed every settlement in Skyrim.

_Yet._

Vilemyr Inn was empty when they stepped in. The innkeeper called Wilhelm had been surprised to hear they were just passing through. Usually, the inn served as a rest stop for pilgrims, but Lucy had no interest in climbing those steps. All she wanted was a warm bath, warm food, and a warm bed.

There was a smoke sauna behind the inn’s main building, standing by the river. It was warmed once a week, and luckily today was the day. All Lucy and Erza had to do by themselves was to carry their own water from the river and boil some in the hot pot. Using it cost them some extra, but Lucy was happy to spend that gold. For forty septims they got a room with two beds and permission to use the sauna for the whole evening if they wanted.

Lucy released the bow from her back before taking off the backpack. Even though she didn’t have many belongings, carrying it the whole day made it feel like it was filled with iron ingots. She straightened her back as she laid her things on top of a chest, and then she collapsed on the bed, letting out a sigh of exhaustion. The fur blanket upon a hay mattress welcomed her into a soft, warm embrace.

”It feels so good to have a roof over my head”, Lucy said, closing her eyes for a moment as she floated in the relaxation spreading across her limbs. ”And walls around me. And a bed. It’s true when they say you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.”

Lucy heard Erza on the other side of the room, placing her stuff in the chest. Her bag had been the largest and heaviest to carry, for she had the tent with her. However, she didn’t complain at all. She had to be used to having a lot of things with her when she travelled. The warrior’s armour clinked as she took it off.

”Enjoy yourself now”, Erza answered. ”The next inn will be in Kynesgrove, and it’s a long way from here.”

Lucy rolled to sit on the edge of the bed. She averted her eyes as Erza slipped out of her linen underclothes and waited until the warrior dressed into a brown, belted tunic. Seeing her in a long dress felt strange to Lucy – Erza no longer looked like a warrior. Maybe even she would get out of her armour if she considered herself to be safe enough. Nothing bad would happen in a small lumbering village. At least Lucy hoped so.

Erza noticed Lucy’s quizzical gaze. ”I have a spare tunic if you want to change after the sauna.”

Lucy kept staring at her in silence for a moment before she understood what Erza had said. She felt tired, as if she hadn’t slept in a week. Answering with a nod, she got up, preparing to make their way outside. She grabbed the linen sheet she would use as a towel, and the dress Erza handed to her. It was a lot longer than her own clothes had been, but Lucy didn’t mind. It would definitely be more comfortable nightwear than leather armour.

Lucy stopped at the porch as she waited for the warrior to follow. She leaned against the wooden railing, looking to the bridge which was already being swallowed by blue twilight. Sadness carved a hole in her chest as she found the road empty. What if Natsu had left them? She had believed they’d meet in Ivarstead as he had said, but what if he had lied? He was supposed to be there already, but he had been so angry it was _likely_ for him to just go. What did he even gain for sticking with them and teaching her magic? Nothing.

Erza patted her shoulder as she appeared. Lucy flinched a bit, awakening from her melancholic state. ”He’ll come, eventually”, she consoled as if she read Lucy’s thoughts. ”Don’t worry about it. Let’s go, I’m dying for a bath.”

Lucy smiled shortly and tore her eyes from the bridge. Matter of fact, maybe it was good that the mage wasn’t there yet. She really preferred bathing with Erza instead of him...

* * *

Water gushed below him as Natsu stopped at the stone bridge which crossed the river. The lights of Ivarstead fluttered in the night, torches moving the dark as few guards patrolled the street. He stood still, hesitating to step further. What if the guards knew his face? Ivarstead was sided with the Stormloacks, but Natsu wasn’t sure where exactly he had collected his plentiful bounty. The gold he found in Embershard mine and Clavicus’s shrine could barely cover a fracture of that.

He had chewed a dried piece of meat for a while now, and was getting thirsty. Repeatedly stabbing a birch had been exhausting, but at the moment he hadn’t found a better way to channel his anger. Setting the entire forest on fire did cross his mind though. Natsu hoped he wouldn’t need his dagger anytime soon - the poor blade was ruined, all blunt and bent. If a man would have spoken to him the way Erza did, the steel would be covered in blood instead of tree sap.

For a moment Natsu had been sure he’d head right back to Winterhold, leaving those lovely ladies on their own. He wasn’t a teacher, no matter how much Lucy wanted him to be. She already knew enough to be accepted as an apprentice – she’d surely pass Mirajane’s, the Master Wizard’s test. Conjuring a familiar was all she’d need to do to get in. But when Natsu had let out most of the steam, it dawned to him how sad Lucy would be if he’d just disappear without saying anything. Damn, she had followed him all the way to the forest just to bring him back to their camp. Natsu couldn’t ignore that, and so he decided to choose the road leading to Ivarstead instead of Winterhold.

Letting out a long, painful sigh, he finished his meal and walked across the bridge. A hood covered his face, only making him appear more suspicious. The night was cold, maybe the guards would understand? He passed by the first guard with his breath ragging in nervousness. Igneel was a master of distracting the guards, always knowing the right words to say to get them out of the trouble. Natsu shared none of that talent, so he hid behind silence.

”You a pilgrim or just passing through?”

Natsu winced as a man’s voice spoke to him. He halted and turned to the speaker, a guard leaning to a wooden wall of a house. A helmet covered his face hiding his expression, but he sounded relaxed and friendly to Natsu. Torchlight danced on the guard’s armour, revealing the purple colours and the emblem of Riften.

”Just passing through”, Natsu answered, his voice dry and quiet. ”Actually, I’m looking for an inn.”

The mage hadn’t visited Ivarstead too often. Maybe once or twice, in fact. The village was all about the High Hrothgar, for the seven thousand steps leading to the monastery started there. Natsu always thought it was insane to build a monastery on the top of the Throat of the World. The Greybeards didn’t seem too bright folk to him anyway. They lived in absolute silence, attuning themselves to the voice of the sky. The monks practised the Way of the Voice, studying the ancient tongue of the dragons. When they spoke, storms brew above the High Hrothgar, and even the mountains shook. Being the masters of the Thu’um, they could kill you by uttering a single word.

The guard gave him a happy sneer. Pilgrims rarely brought any gold to the city, unlike visitors. ”Ah, a tired traveller. Vilemyr Inn is right on the left. A few other travellers are stopping by, but I’m sure there’s a room available for you.”

”Thanks.”

A wave of relief washed over his tense body. First of all, the guard didn’t recognise him. He was also glad to hear of other travellers, who had to be Erza and Lucy – who else would they be? Though he wasn’t so happy about seeing Erza again, he was sure he could forgive her after a few good ales. Maybe he’d challenge her to a brawl to settle the score. He’d like to punch her legitimately at least once. He was a lot stronger than two years ago.

Natsu nodded to the man as he headed towards the building on the left side of the road. He stopped in front of the inn’s porch and raised his head. The silhouette of the mountain contrasted against the starry sky. Why would anyone even want to make a pilgrimage to the top? The monks took no visitors, and the monastery's doors were tightly locked. Maybe the pilgrims were insane, too.

When Natsu lowered his head before climbing the steps to the inn, his eyes registered a small bundle sitting on the wooden stairs. It was hard to notice, for the black cloth blended into the darkness, but there was definitely a person. Natsu frowned. Why would someone be out there in the cold at this time of a day? More importantly, why would a child be out there, and alone?

”Hey, what are you doing here?” Natsu asked from the small bundle. ”You should be at home.”

A boy’s face emerged from the shadows, young and pale. The corners of his mouth drew downward, forming a miserable pout. ”I’m… I’m waiting for papa.”

Natsu knit his brows together as he fixed his backpack. It weighed a ton for he had been carrying it all day. His legs ached from walking and he’d do anything to lay down in a bed, but first, he had to figure out what the child’s problem was. A missing dad? Surely nothing too serious. There was nothing else to do in this damned village than to drink all night.

”Is your papa in the inn? Should I go ask him to take you home?”

The boy shook his head.

”Is he working late?” Another headshake. ”Does your mother know where he is?”

A quiet sniffle filled the night air. Natsu’s throat tightened.

”He… He promised he’d be back in a week… but he still hasn’t come...”

”Where did he go?”

”Papa said he’d… he’d go for a trip... and that he’d come back stronger… so strong he would lift five logs at once...”

Natsu didn’t consider himself as a very smart man, but there were times when his mind connected dots surprisingly fast. This was one of those times. Natsu’s heart dropped to his stomach as he realised what was going on. He fell speechless and just stared at the boy, not knowing at all what to do.

”I didn’t mean it… when I said he’s a weakling… for making me and mama do all the work while he’s out there drinking… I didn’t want him to leave us!”

The boy broke into weeping, and Natsu bit his lower lip. He sat down next to the boy, leaning his chin to his hands. If he barely handled it when women shed tears, he felt utterly helpless when the children cried. He didn’t want anyone to cry, but the comfort he offered usually made them feel worse. Just how could he tell this boy what happened to his papa? There was no way he could tell the truth. Quickly, he tried to come up with a white lie to cheer the kid up.

”Hey, uhm… Maybe your papa is out there training? It takes a long time before he can get strong enough to lift five logs at once. It might take a month or two or something.”

”But I miss him!”

”I know, I know, but…” Natsu paused to think, nervously scratching his neck. ”When he comes back, he’s so strong you don’t have to work at all. He can do all the work for you. He probably thought about that when he left.”

”Really?” The boy's voice brightened a little.

”Yeah. You just… You just wait patiently, I’m sure your papa is going to return, sooner or later.”

”I… I hope so...”

Natsu looked at the boy, glad he stopped crying. ”What’s your name, boy?”

”R-Romeo.”

”Okay, Romeo. Look, I’m a traveller. If I cross paths with your papa, I’ll tell him to hurry back. Is that okay? You should go home to your mother before you catch a cold.”

The boy nodded, wiping his eyes. Natsu patted the child on the back, urging him to rise up. He smiled at the mage before running down the street, vanishing into the dark. Natsu buried his face into his hands to mumble his curses. Now he actually _had to_ bring the damn mutt back to the Clavicus to get the boy’s father back home. But how could he find a single dog? It could be anywhere in Skyrim, or even worse, it could have crossed the borders. Natsu slammed his fist on his thigh.

’ _I have to tell Erza and Lucy.’_

Natsu rose up and rushed inside the inn. A bald man stood behind the counter, his eyebrows rising almost to his hairline as the newest customer made his entrance. Natsu greeted the innkeeper by quickly taking his hand to his temple. The tavern was empty, but he heard familiar voices coming from the room on the right. He listened closely, recognising Lucy’s laughter.

Natsu hurried to the room’s closed door, slammed it open and stepped in.

”Hey! I really have to tell you -”

”NATSU!”

Lucy screamed, covering her body with a piece of cloth. Her blonde hair dripped water down her bare skin. Natsu’s gaze stopped at the curve of her lower back. Stunned, he stood in the doorway, unable to finish his sentence. Erza sat on the other bed wearing a towel around herself, murderously staring at the mage.

”IDIOT! You can’t just burst into a ladies room like that!” Lucy shrieked, squeezing her eyes closed and waving her arm towards him.

”But -”

”Get out!”

Awkwardly, Natsu stepped back and closed the door. Someone laughed behind him. The mage turned around, seeing the innkeeper hiding his mouth with his hand, trying to cover his amusement. Why did something like this always happen to him? He just wanted to tell them what he had found out as soon as possible before he'd forget it.

”What are you laughing at?” Natsu asked.

”Nothing”, he answered. ”I can get you a room of your own. Welcome to Vilemyr Inn, traveller.”

Still not realising what he had done wrong, or what the man was laughing at, Natsu admitted. Maybe it was for the best. Natsu reached for the gold purse in his bag. It felt heavy enough, so he could easily afford his stay.

”Ten gold for the room, twenty if you want to use the sauna. It’s free at the moment.”

A warm sauna sounded too good after the frigid wash he had yesterday. Natsu counted the gold pieces and added some extra coins for food and ale. After he had paid, the innkeeper showed him to a small room. He left his stuff there and went back to the main hall to get the fresh ale he had been craving for days. Natsu sat down to a table with this drink. Chatter and laughter echoed from the ladies’ room – Natsu deemed they had had some good time while he was on his own. Though he hadn’t gotten a very warm welcoming from them, he was glad they all were in the same place again. It had been a boring and lonely trip for him.

Halfway through his drink, the door opened. Lucy and Erza walked to the tavern, clad in long brown tunics. They both had braided their wet hair, looking weird to Natsu’s eye. He figured out they had been to the sauna before he arrived, their cheeks still red from the hot bath. Erza went to the counter to buy herself a drink while Lucy came to the mage, resting her arms on her hips.

”You really should learn to knock”, she said.

Natsu gulped his drink. ”Looks like I’ve got a lot to learn lately.”

Lucy took a seat next to him and grabbed a piece of bread from the basket on the table.

”What did you have to tell us?” she asked. He had to gather his lost thought before answering.

”The troll-man lives here in Ivarstead”, Natsu whispered, sure that the innkeeper wouldn’t hear. If an innkeeper knew something, it meant that the entire village knew. ”I met a boy who’s looking for his papa, and figured it out.”

Lucy’s brown eyes widened, glistening in the candlelight. The oversized tunic made her appear smaller than she was.

”Really? Then we really have to find that dog. But it could be anywhere...”

Natsu nodded grimly. He could see in Lucy’s shrinking gesture how bad she felt for the boy. He felt bad for that kid, too, but at least now he wouldn’t carry that alone. Together they would find that dog and return the man back to normal. The Daedra didn’t ruin only the lives of the ones meddling with them, but the entire families as well.

The mage took another sip of his ale and heard footsteps behind him. He glanced over his shoulder. It was the warrior.

”Hey, Natsu”, Erza started shyly. ”I’m sorry for what I said. And… Sorry for your loss.”

Natsu hadn’t expected her to apologise. Confused, he looked at Lucy, knowing she had to be behind that. ”It’s okay”, he said, smiling shortly. He wasn’t even angry anymore. The birch had absorbed most of his anger.

”Is there any way we can make this up?” the warrior asked. 

His lips twisted into a grin. _This_ he had been waiting for. While his mind was fast to forget, his rib bones still sought for revenge.

”Fight me.”

Erza blinked. ”What?”

”A hundred gold says I knock your hide to the ground. Just fists. No weapons, no magic... no crying.”

That probably hadn’t been the reconciliation Lucy had hoped for. The blonde girl pinched her lips, sinking deeper into her chair. Natsu’s smirk kept widening.

”Well...” the warrior rubbed her chin, grinning. ”It has been said that a true Nord never misses a chance to miss her worth...”

Natsu poured the rest of the ale to his mouth, rose up and punched redhead to the cheek. _Damn_ , it felt good.

There was an old Nord proverb Natsu always agreed with: the heat of battle was the fire which forged the strongest blades. And that night when he finally won Erza in a brawl he felt like the strongest man in the world.

* * *

**A/N: Ivarstead's bridge and the inn**

  


**I admit, the plot has been a little repetitive so far (Natsu causes trouble and they solve the trouble), but I promise that’s going to change. I think this pattern has been necessary for introducing the main characters, their personalities, backstories, flaws etc before dwelling deeper into the plot I’ve planned. Natsu will behave better from here on. Maybe? He kinda lives his own life.**

**There aren’t any bathing places in Skyrim except for the hot springs, but I thought it would be more ”realistic” if each settlement had at least one public place for bathing. A smoke sauna is a traditional Nordic sauna which had been around since the iron age, so I think it fits Skyrim lore well enough. There’s a traditional smoke sauna in my grandparent’s place and it’s really nice. Thanks for all the comments and kudos! Hope you enjoyed this chapter ^^ There's the first major plot twist coming up soon! It really gets the events moving.**


	11. MEMORIAL

_I would have won that brawl if had my armour on._

It had been two days but the mage still wore that damned grin on his face every time he saw Erza. Or every time she spoke. Suddenly, his fear for her had faded, and she hadn’t decided if it was good or not. It was late afternoon, and he had already been training with Lucy for hours. Smirking insolently, he glanced over his shoulder before summoning a flame atronach. Erza sighed at the authority she had lost in Ivarstead.

The narrow path zigzagged down the mountain’s side. Erza could see all over the volcanic tundra of Eastmarch from there, opening vast and beautiful in front of her eyes. Erza was looking forward to a bath in the hot springs. She always stopped by whenever she was around the area. Nothing made her tired muscles more relaxed. The sabre cats who lived there made her nervous, though. And the giants with their mammoths. Most of the time the giants were peaceful, but she wasn’t sure if Natsu would hold back the urge to provoke them. Erza had seen what the giant’s club did to a man – it would surely send him flying up to the Secunda.

Erza walked behind those two, vaguely keeping an eye out for them. She was ready to call them out if needed, but at least for today, Natsu’s flames had stayed contained and Lucy’s arrows hadn’t hit anything or anyone except the trees. Maybe the mage had actually understood that a mentor was supposed to keep their apprentice alive. Erza wiped the scarlet locks from her face, gently smiling at the process Natsu had made. She still remembered him as he had been two years ago. He had been just a defiant and stubborn brat, but now he was slowly becoming a man.

The weather was pleasant, warm enough to let them pack their cloaks for the day. Sunlight glistened on the dim steel Erza was clad in. She would need to polish her armour once she’d get back to Whiterun, but in fact, she preferred her mail that way, old and dented. Soldiers who ran into a battle in their brand-new, shining armour seldom made it back. Her steel had seen many battles and taken many hits, and because of those dints and scapes, she always made it back to Jorrvaskar. The brawl with Natsu made her realise _she_ wasn’t made of steel. Only her armour was.

Vilkas, her shield-brother always told her not to underestimate the little ones. They made up for in agility what they lacked in strength. Her confidence failed her this time. The mage had been stronger than he looked like, a lot stronger than two years ago – when she _had_ worn her armour. She had forgotten how it felt like to be punched directly to the muscle with no steel suppressing the blow. Damn, her bruises still hurt. But the wound her pride suffered, that would heal so much slower. Losing a hundred gold was nothing, but to lose a fistfight to a skinny mage? Gods, she was so glad no-one from the Companions was there to witness her grand defeat.

Well, maybe now Natsu would stop whining about his rib-bones. Maybe it was more of a wound of his pride in the end, that debt now repaid.

A firebolt flew past her head. Her shoulders tensed, but she didn’t bother to yell. She had kept a fair distance to those two and knew they wouldn’t see her disapproving frown. Lucy waved her hand as an apology. Barely hearing what the blonde said to the mage, Erza figured she gave him a lecture in her stead. The flame atronach disappeared back to Oblivion, and fireballs no longer flew, letting the journey continue in peace.

The two last days had been peaceful indeed. They had seen a sleeping sabre cat but managed to sneak past it. Otherwise, there had been no troubles on their road. Erza had agreed to escort them to Kynesgrove the morning they left Ivarstead. There they would part ways, but she was sure they would make it to Winterhold on their own from there. Lucy had already made great process. Her determination to become a mage shone through her, and she wouldn’t let anything stand in the way of her dream. Not even death.

Natsu and Lucy reached the road below and turned left, running to the bridge which crossed the river. Erza heard the waterfall roaring even from there. They had walked past many waterfalls of the Darkwater River, but the one which ended in White River was the most majestic of them all. Erza would allow them to adore it for a while until she’d climbed down the path, but then it would be time to go. She planned to spend the next night in Darkwater Crossing, a small mining settlement just by the river. Natsu fiercely opposed the idea, for it was the place where the Imperials had ambushed Ulfric Stormcloack. Erza had to convince him that the soldiers probably didn’t have any interest in capturing him again. Compared to a living dragon, a little mage couldn’t be high on their list of concern.

Erza jumped over the brook, setting her foot on the stone-covered road. She stretched her legs which ached from the long descent. A level surface to walk on was a welcomed change. Erza raised her eyes from the ground. A group of people clad in black robes approached on the other side of the bridge. The warrior pinched her brows together when one of them stopped next to Natsu. Erza saw his pointy elven ears through his long, black hair. From his ashen grey skin, she recognised him as a Dark Elf.

”Hey, what are you doing in _my_ robes?” the man asked, his voice carrying all the way to Erza.

Smelling trouble, Erza walked closer to the bridge. Natsu let go of the railing, turning towards the approacher with a confused look on his face. Judging from the patterns in their robes they were elven necromancers. Erza counted two women and one man, making three of them altogether.

”What?” Natsu asked.

The elf took a closer look at his clothes, clearly making the mage nervous. ”Those are definitely my spare robes. And that silver around her neck is mine, too.”

Lucy stepped behind Natsu when the man’s bright red eyes found her jewel. Erza grabbed the hilt of her sword, ready to draw it in case they turned hostile.

”Well, finders, keepers”, Natsu hissed. ”Creep.”

The Dark Elf’s presence filled with resentment. Erza stopped where the bridge began to keep a distance. Mages were unpredictable for the level of their skills couldn’t be seen from the outside. Some of their robes showed their ranks, but Erza was unfamiliar to the mage’s code of hierarchy.

”I’m not going to let you walk away with my stuff, thief.”

Natsu frowned. ”Wait, I’d just give these robes back to you right now, right here? You really want to see me naked that bad?” He stepped closer to the elf and grinned wickedly. ”I bet you’d get scared of my huge -”

”Quit it, Natsu!” Lucy cut him off, squeezing her eyes closed. She grabbed Natsu’s sleeve and pulled him away from the elf. ”I’m sorry, I’m sure there’s a way to settle this thing without violence. You can have this amulet back, but can you please let him keep the robes? Deal?”

The Dark Elf stepped back, raising his eyebrows. ”Natsu?”

”You know me?”

”You’re Natsu of Dragonbridge?”

Erza let her sword go as the tension in the air vanished. Those were the necromancers from Clavicus Vile’s shrine, and it unsettled her that they knew him.

Natsu leaned to the railing again, but his fists were still clenched in tight fists. ”Yeah, what about it?”

”Damn, I didn’t recognise you. You’ve grown so much”, the Dark Elf said, spreading his arms. ”I don’t expect you to remember me. You had just joined when I left the College.”

The two women, both Wood Elves, exchanged confused gazes. Erza kept an eye out for them, but they didn’t seem hostile either. It was still better to be safe than sorry. Even if that man was from the College, it didn’t mean he could be trusted. In her books, no-one from the College could be trusted by default.

Natsu stared at him, clearly failing to recognise him. ”And you are…?”

”Felrys, Igneel’s older cousin”, the elf introduced himself, making Natsu’s eyes widen. ”How strange. I had a bizarre dream about him just recently. It has been years since we last met. How’s he doing now?”

Erza bit her lip as Natsu’s head fell down in silence. She had experienced the rawness of that wound very personally. Unlike that time, no anger gleamed in his eyes and no flames sparked in his fists. Lucy hadn’t let go of his sleeve, and Erza had a feeling she helped him remain calm. He wouldn’t let his feelings explode around Lucy.

The Dark Elf’s mouth opened, shock and sorrow creeping up to his face. When Natsu finally spoke, the silence had lasted long enough to let him know what happened to Igneel.

”He’s dead”, he whispered, quiet as a breath of wind. ”Imperials executed him in Helgen a week ago.”

Felrys flinched as if he had hoped to hear something better. Reality had a tendency to crush such hopes, at least in dark times like this. ”Sheogorath’s beard… Azura bless his soul”, he offered condolences, his gaze falling to the ground.

”Yeah.”

”Did you give him to the fire?”

Erza felt cold shivers running down her spine. In Helgen she had seen how the mage cremated a corpse and smashed the wooden block with an axe, but she hadn’t even batted an eye for it. She should have realised he had lost someone important instead of reacting with such indifference.

Natsu nodded. ”Yes, I burned him so he might return to the ash from whence he came.”

Felrys gave him a small bow as thanks. Burning the dead was a Dunmer funeral custom. They believed that death was not the end, but a beginning.

”Come to think of it, I borrowed some things from him a long time ago”, Felrys told, his words shivering from the lingering grief. ”I was supposed to return them, but never got a chance. Would you take them now, and at least bring them back to the College?”

Natsu looked at Felrys, thinking for a moment before he nodded again.

”I got nothing to remember him from. I’d gladly take them.”

”That’s good. We were going to check our fish traps in the river. Would you want to come with us to our settlement in Fort Amol? I’d want to have a memorial of sort for my dear cousin. Let us raise a toast for his memory?”

The mage smiled sorrowfully. However, Erza did not like that. She stepped forward, finally making them notice her. Her plan was absolute and not to be disrupted.

”Thank you, but we were going to -”

”Okay”, Natsu spoke over her. ”We’ll come.”

”But -”

”You go to that Crapwater Crossing if you want, I’m not setting my foot on that Imperial ambush. I’m going. What about you, Lucy?”

Meekly, the blonde glanced at the warrior. Erza could tell it from her eyes that she wanted to go with him.

”I’ll… I’ll come, too.”

Erza sighed and crossed her arms on her chest. If those two would go, it meant she had to go too. She wouldn’t let them go alone.

”That sounds great. Wait on this bridge, we’ll come back in a second”, Felrys said and gestured towards the Wood Elves. Then they set forth and quickly disappeared from the road. When they were gone, Erza walked to Natsu, not hiding her disapproval.

”Did you actually get us into a necromancer’s party?” Erza asked. The mage turned his back at her to gaze into the waterfall, his retort buried under the gush.

\---

Despite being a memorial, the mood in the dining hall was rather high.

Fort Amol was a traditional Nordic stronghold with a courtyard in the center, surrounded by two main buildings. The prison was said to be plagued by skeevers, but the main keep was clear of that problem. It had been abandoned for years until the group of necromancers claimed it theirs. If not counting a brief visit to the barracks in the ruined Helgen keep, Lucy had never been in a castle. And she wasn’t very impressed.

Lucy sat tight on the bench next to Natsu, locking her eyes on the bowl in front of her. The mages served fresh fish soup with bread, wine and ale. She enjoyed the meal, but the company wasn’t what she had expected. Dozens of stories about magic were told, but she didn’t have a single word to add to the conversation. They spoke of spells and enchantments and it all was like a foreign language Lucy couldn’t understand. Feeling such an outsider she sank into silence, staring at the mages under her brows.

A Wood Elf woman sat opposite to them, leaning her elbows to the table. Lucy had seen her on the bridge earlier but didn’t remember her name. She didn’t speak much either, but her dreamy elven eyes fixated to the pink-haired mage. Natsu didn’t even notice, for he was too focused on sharing stories with Igneel’s cousin and his friends. Lucy had lost count how many tankards of ale he had emptied. Natsu had told about how he fell down the stairs of Labyrinthian at least three times already, marking he had a little more than enough to drink.

”… when Igneel got really, reeally drunk, he started to... to see dwarves. He shouted _’I saw a dwarf! I did! I did!_ ’ in the middle of a goddamn city.” Natsu broke into laughter. ”And I yelled _’_ _No, sorry_ _, no dwarf!’_ when people stared at us...”

Lucy heard how alcohol made him stammer, changing his voice to something she no longer recognised. Back in Ivarstead, he had only taken an ale or two with absolutely no effect. Being around him when he was drunk felt like being around a stranger. With loneliness building up in her chest, she finished her meal and excluded herself. He didn’t notice when she left the table.

Lucy walked to the corner of the hall where the chatter and laughter faded. Bookshelves leaned to the stone walls inviting her to take a better look. A torch on the wall gave warm, soft light, just enough for her to read. Books never failed to bring her comfort.

Lucy traced her finger across the backs of the books, reading their names. _Ancestors and the Dunmer, Azura and the Box, Battle of Sancre Tor, Darkest Darkness…_ When she was sure she wouldn’t find anything interesting to read, her finger stopped at a certain book. A lump formed in her throat. _A Dream of Sovngarde._ It was a Nord soldier’s account of visiting the afterlife in a dream. Her parents had a copy of that book at home. She had read it a few times before. Lucy opened the book and skimmed through the pages, searching for the one specific part which had imprinted in her memory forever.

The writer was about to die in a few hours so he prayed for Talos to get some encouragement. His prayers were answered when sleep carried him to Sovngarde. He had crossed a great bridge made of whale-bone and entered the Hall of Valor, meeting the greatest heroes of all Nords. There he had found Ysgamor, the father of Skyrim. He asked for his council for his heart was full of fear in front of the desperate battle he was going to face. Ysgamor had raised his tankard to his lips and drank until it was empty. Then he spoke again, and Lucy found the part she was looking for.

_"Remember this always, son of the north - a Nord is judged not by the manner in which he lived, but the manner in which he died."_

The words had brought her comfort and courage when she read them as a child. Her great-grandmother Anna had died in a battle, so Lucy believed her soul had travelled to Sovngarde. Lucy dreamt of becoming a hero herself so she would meet Anna in the afterlife, but now when death had touched her life for the first time, she wanted to smack herself for ever thinking that. How naive she had been. Her parents did not die in a battle, so their souls wound up somewhere in the Aetherius to wait for the end of the world. She couldn’t even build a grave for their memory, for nothing but ashes remained of them.

Lucy closed the book and put it back to the shelf. Her hands trembled as her throat tightened, images from Helgen flashing in her mind again. There was no memorial for them, no-one to ask what happened to them, not a distant relative to share her sorrow with. Everyone she had ever known was dead.

She peeked over her shoulder. Natsu raised his tankard of ale, his voice getting louder the more he drank. Her blood rushed in her ears, words blending to the screams arising from her memory. She stared at the merry group, her arms limp and lifeless on her sides. Suddenly it truly dawned to her she would never go home again. She’d never hug her mother again, or see her father’s smile. Yes, she had prayed for an adventure, but what adventure would it be if there was no place to go back to after it’d be over?

”Are you okay, Lucy?”

Lucy turned towards the voice which interrupted her melancholy. Erza appeared from the shadows, for she hadn’t taken any part in the feast. The moment they had set their feet inside, she had disappeared to the loneliest corner of the castle. Lucy wanted to lie but knew the warrior would see through that. ”Actually, I’m not.”

The warrior shrugged. She had expected that answer. ”We can still go to Darkwater Crossing if you want. It’s not like he’ll mind. It’s safe there.”

Erza clearly didn’t trust the necromancers, but where she came from, Lucy understood her. But to Lucy, those mages seemed just like any other people having a feast. She believed they’d be safe there. She even preferred to have a roof over her head after spending two nights in a tent.

”It’s not that”, Lucy whispered, shaking her head. ”I just… I’d want to have a memorial for my parents. They died that day, too.”

Erza gave her a sympathetic smile, her eyes filling with warmth. She didn’t say anything as she walked to the dinner table to grab two goblets. The warrior filled them with wine, brought them back and gave one to Lucy. She raised her drink, looking down in honour.

”Which were your parent’s names?”

”Layla and Jude Heartfilia.”

Erza nodded before starting to speak. ”Before the ancient flame, we grieve. At this loss, we weep. For the fallen, we shout. And for ourselves, we take our leave.”

Lucy sipped from the goblet, cringing at the sour taste. Those were lines of Companions funeral custom, and she felt more than honoured to hear them for her parents' sake. A moment of silence followed, raising tears in Lucy’s eyes, but it was all she needed to carry on. For herself, she had to take her leave.

”So you’re Lucy Heartfilia, right? I didn’t realise. I’ve heard your family business was successful.”

Lucy’s finger squeezed around the goblet. The wine oscillated as her hand shivered. ”Our shop did well, but we weren’t that rich. My father’s family kept that store for generations.”

”It’s a good sing when a store actually stays in business for generations.”

She smiled softly – she knew many other stores weren’t as lucky. Her father was a really talented vendor who always managed to bargain the best prices. She never lacked anything in her childhood, and maybe it was the easy life which made her reach for the stars. It was the nature of a human being to look for a challenge.

”Where are you from, Erza?”

The warrior glanced at the mages. None of them paid any attention to her and Lucy, but Erza still gestured backwards, pointing to the most distant corner of the hall. There were two chairs around a wooden table, and a fireplace providing warmth and dim light. Lucy took the hint and followed the warrior as they walked there, the laughter and drinking songs fading to the background.

Erza seated and drank her wine as if she needed alcohol’s courage to open up. ”I’m from Rorikstead.”

”Oh”, Lucy exhaled and sat down. ”I thought you were from Whiterun.”

”Not at all. The first time I visited Whiterun was when I joined the Companions. Rorikstead was the only place I knew.”

”It would be a shame to know nothing more than the town where you were born, right?”

Erza chuckled dryly.

”That’s true. Leaving was the best decision of my life.”

”Got no ties there?”

The warrior shook her head. ”None.”

”No family?”

Her silence made Lucy regret her question. It seemed the steel plate wasn’t the only armour Erza wore. She was shrouded in mystery. How in the Oblivion had Natsu learned she had ties to the Dark Brotherhood? Erza took another sip, and it dawned to Lucy that alcohol had made her slip.

”My mother was a waitress in the Frostfruit Inn”, Erza started, keeping her voice low. ”And my father was a soldier in the Great War. I was a result of a night my father spent in the inn on his way to the battle. He promised to return to my mother, but never did.”

Lucy swallowed. Erza didn’t need to tell what happened to her father, for Lucy already knew. The Great War between the Aldmeri Dominion and the Empire had heavy casualties on both sides, and Erza’s father was one of them.

”I’m sorry”, Lucy whispered, not knowing anything else to say.

”Don’t be. My mother was a strong woman, and she raised me alone for the first six years. Then she got a better-paying job from Solitude.”

Lucy raised her brows, remembering Erza had never left her hometown. ”She left you in Rorikstead?”

”I didn’t want to go”, Erza answered. ”I fought her with a stick when she tried to take me with her.”

Lucy chuckled. ”I can imagine that.”

”It was because of my closest friend. I didn’t want to leave him behind. His family had a little farm, so they took me in. I lived there helping with the animals and the crops until my friend moved to Cyrodiil. Then was my time to find my own path, too.”

The Great War ended 26 years ago, so Lucy counted Erza had to be at least 25. Farmers and Companions truly had different ways of life, and Lucy adored Erza’s courage to take a leap that great. Her leap from a merchant to a mage wasn’t the smallest either, and sometimes she felt terrified of the path she had chosen.

”Did you always know you’d want to be a Companion?”

”Not always”, the warrior said, surprising Lucy. Her lips twitched into a smile. ”When I was a child I wanted to be a baker. And to be honest, I still like to surprise my fellow Companions with a cake from time to time.”

”Really? I’m miserable at baking. I always burn everything I cook.”

”Like an alchemy lab?”

Lucy sneered. ”Exactly. Why did I ever think I’d learn alchemy?”

”It was your first try. You’ll do better next time. It’s astonishing how fast you’ve learned magic, considering you don’t have the best mentor.”

There was no sarcasm in Erza’s tone. The compliment meant more to Lucy than she could ever explain. Lately, she had been drowning in self-doubt and envy. Natsu’s skills made her question if she was even capable of becoming a mage at all.

”What about you, did you always want to become a wizard?” Erza asked. ”That’s an unusual dream for a Nord.”

”Yes”, Lucy answered without a second’s hesitation. She couldn’t remember dreaming of anything else. ”And that dream wasn’t well-received in a Nord merchant family.”

”I know. But you’ll live your own life, making your own path. It takes a lot of strength and courage, but I’m sure your ancestors are smiling at you.”

Lucy smiled at her, hoping that was true. Maybe her parents would smile at her too. Her dream of magic was the light in the darkest time of her life, and now it was coming true. Slowly, but surely. She just had to believe in herself.

The bridge of her thoughts led to the fire mage. Lucy took a look at the dinner table and found him at the same spot where she had left him. The smile on her face faded when she noticed the Wood Elf climbing over the table, seating herself on Natsu’s thigh.

”Excuse me?” Lucy heard him say. His brows furrowed as he drank his ale, confusedly looking at the woman. He swayed from side to side, struggling to sit straight. He was totally wasted. Lucy hadn’t paid any attention to the conversations of the table, but now she heard everything they said.

”My sir, I heard you got something huge under your robes?” the Wood Elf flirted, blinking her large, pitch-black eyes.

”Yeah, whatabout it?”

The woman played with her amber curls, twirling a lock around her finger. ”Mind showing it to me?”

”Sure, yeah, whatever”, Natsu answered, slightly opening the wrap of his clothes, revealing his side. ”This huge-ass scar, I got it… damn, how did I get it… I don’t even remember...”

”I… I thought you… meant something else...”

”Like what?”

The Wood Elf bit her lip, unsure what to do with his cluelessness.

”Uhm, I...”

The frown on his face deepened as he stared at the woman, his mind working hard to figure out what she was about. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned closer to whisper something in his ear.

” _That’s_ what you thought!?” Natsu exclaimed and pushed the woman away from him. She shrieked as she dropped to the floor from his lap. ”Why’d you think I… I’d mean... _that_? Damn pervert...”

Lucy buried her face into her hands to muffle her giggling as well as hide the blush creeping to her cheeks. The elven woman got herself back up, frustration and embarrassment mixing up on her face. Lucy felt pretty stupid. She didn’t think of herself as a pervert, but even she had thought about _tha_ _t_. How could he be so oblivious? And what kind of a man boasted about his scars? All young men she had known definitely boasted about something else...

”That guy is never going to get himself a woman”, Erza laughed. ” _Never._ ”

Lucy agreed. ”It doesn’t look like he even wants one…”

When the Wood Elf left him alone, Natsu noticed Lucy was missing from his side. He stared at the empty seat for a moment before raising his head and looking around. His face brightened when his eyes found Lucy, and he waved his hand to greet her as if they had been apart for a longer time than half an hour. He said something to Felrys before he got up and walked across the hall, his steps zigzagging along the way. The more Lucy witnessed of his drunken state, the more glad she was about not finishing even the first goblet of wine.

”Heeyyy, what’s up?” he said merrily as he reached them, suddenly turning white as a ghost. ”I… I think I’m gonna puke...”

Natsu grabbed the basket behind Lucy. Her eyes caught something purple inside, quickly recognising it as a book. As fast as a charging snake she saved the book right before Natsu shoved his head into the basket and threw up.

”Look where you puke, idiot! You almost ruined a book!”

”If it was kept in a bucket... it, it means... someone wiped their arse into it –”

Lucy cringed as he vomited again. She pitied him for getting himself into such a miserable condition so fast, but she guessed it was his way to handle his grief. When he was done, he lied down, close to Lucy’s feet. Tightly hugging the bucket, he curled up like a cat. A really drunk cat.

”I’m… I’m gonna take a nap...” he muttered while his eyes slipped closed.

Lucy’s legs tensed. ”Seriously? At my feet?”

”I’m gonna take a nap right here...”

”Gods”, Lucy sighed but didn’t bother to kick him away either. He had gotten some of the alcohol out of his body and a little rest would hopefully restore him back to normal. She moved her gaze from the passed-out mage to the purple book in her lap. A daedric symbol was carved to its cover. A spellbook. Damn, she’d be so furious if Natsu had ruined that.

”Would you look at that”, a man’s voice said, having approached without Lucy’s notice. Her eyes shoot up to Felrys. He wore a wide grin. ”The whelp couldn’t handle his drink.”

Lucy fell into a shy silence, not knowing at all what to say. She looked at Natsu again, who was already tight asleep.

”Too much, too fast”, Erza commented as she went to pick up Natsu’s bucket. ”He’s so going to regret this tomorrow. Our travel schedule has no mercy.” She probably meant _she_ had no mercy, but Lucy stayed quiet about that. Erza left to empty the bucket outside, making Lucy happy. It didn’t smell too good.

”Where are you headed?” Felrys asked when Erza was out of sight.

”To Winterhold”, Lucy answered, gathering up her courage to talk to him. ”I’m going to join the College.”

”Oh really? Good luck with that.”

Lucy was uncertain if his tone was mocking or encouraging. She had heard small glimpses of their conversation, and understood Felrys had been suspended from the College due to some ’ _failed experiments_ ’. Lucy didn’t want to know what kind of experiments those had been.

”I heard you studied there.”

”Yes, yes, but it has been years. I was there at the same time with this moron’s brother. I remember him well. I’ve never met a wizard that talented”, Felrys said, briefly zoning out to visit his memories. ”It was horrible, that what happened. Her death really shook the entire College like another Great Collapse.”

Lucy winced, glancing at the sleeping mage beneath her feet. ”Whose death?”

”Mavis was her name”, the Dark Elf answered. ”She was a skilled restoration wizard, beautiful and kind like a princess. She and Zeref were about to get married, but she died before the wedding. They were exploring a Dwemer ruin when something went wrong. He couldn’t even retrieve her corpse.”

”That’s so sad.”

”It was indeed. Zeref was crushed, and he disappeared a few months later. Some say he went to follow her, while some say he’s still alive. No-one really knows what happened to him.”

”Does Natsu know about that?”

”He does”, Felrys said. ”We told him everything when he came looking for his brother. I bet he doesn’t really like to talk about him.”

Lucy nodded. She had noticed the same thing, but she understood him. He was evasive when their discussions led to personal things. It was clear that there was so much pain lying beneath his silence.

”But what do we have here?” the Dark Elf switched the subject to something happier and pointed at the book in her hands.

”I… I saved it”, Lucy whispered. ”It was in the bucket.”

”Ah. It’s a Bound Bow spell. Take it if you want. If it was in the bucket, it means nobody will miss it.”

Her eyes widened in excitement. ”Really?”

”Sure. How long have you been practising magic?”

”For a few days...”

”Oh. Then it will be a while before you can use it, but don’t get depressed about it. That’s an adept level spell. If Phinis Gestor is still around in the College he can surely help you with that.”

Lucy smiled shyly and pressed the book against her chest. She’d treasure the book and keep it safe until she’d learn it. Natsu had told her about Bound weapons. Those were ethereal versions of Daedric weapons, and incredibly strong. However, they had their own disadvantages. Using them cost a lot of magic, meaning they couldn’t be conjured if the user was already out of magicka.

Felrys looked at Lucy from head to toes, shaking his head a bit. ”No offence, but you don’t look much like a mage in that leather suit.”

”I know, but… I can’t defend myself well, and...”

”Look, a mage’s got to wear robes. Robes let us move freely and the enchantments aid with casting spells. Come with me, I’ll check if we have something suitable for you.”

Lucy’s heart began to race in her chest. He wouldn’t have to ask twice. She left Natsu to sleep on the floor as she followed Felrys upstairs.

\---

Having a sensitive nose wasn’t always a good thing. Erza had flushed the vomit bucket with water from the well, probably in vain, for she had a feeling he would need it again. By the time she got back, Lucy was missing, and Natsu was still lying on the ground. Suspecting Lucy had gone somewhere with the necromancer, Erza walked to Natsu and crouched next to him, gently patting him on the back. He groaned, cracking his cloudy eyes open.

Erza offered him her waterskin. ”Take a drink.”

”More wine? Oh, no…”

”It’s water, idiot.”

Hesitantly, he grabbed the waterskin and drank. Then he rolled back to his side and gladly took back the bucket, leaning into it. He stared into the distance as he clung on the verge of sleep until something flinched him up.

”Is that really Lucy?” he mumbled, gazing at the figure who had just appeared to the bottom end of the stairs. Erza turned her head from the mage and saw her, dressed in a long, black robe. A belt was wrapped around her waist and a large hood pulled over her head, revealing only a few locks of her fair hair. She radiated confidence. And magic.

”Now she looks like a mage”, Natsu said and smirked before his head thudded against the floor as he passed out again.

If Erza ever had to define happiness, it was Lucy at that very moment.

* * *

**A/N: Scenery from the mountain side, the bridge upon the waterfall and Fort Amol**

  
  


**Felrys and the other mages from this chapter are all original characters I made up.**

**I hoped you liked this chapter! It was meant to be different from the previous chapters, I hope I succeed to bring some more variety to the story. Soon I've introduced everything that's needed to know before the events really start rolling. It's going to be one more chapter before things get serious. What do you think is going to happen?**


	12. DRAGON'S TONGUE

”Hey, idiot, wake up.”

Strong hands grabbed him from the shoulders and shook the sleep away from him. The light burned his eyes like fire when he cracked them open. Instinctively, he shielded his face with his hands – his old bruises were healing nice enough, and he didn’t want to have new ones.

”Come with me now”, a man’s voice said. Natsu was relieved to hear it wasn’t Erza who woke him.”The steel lady will beat your ass if you’re not ready to leave at sunrise.”

Felrys patted him on the back, urging him to get up. An ache throbbed inside his head like a war hammer smashing his skull from the inside. Felrys’s lantern gave faint light, letting Natsu see the two women sleeping on the other side of the room. Carefully he lifted his body and realised he was in his own bedroll. He didn’t know how he got there. His last memory was seeing Lucy in black robes. She had looked strange in them. Or not strange. Funny? No. Nice? Not that either. He didn’t know a word to describe that sight.

”Shit”, Natsu groaned and rubbed his neck. Every movement hurt. Had he lost a brawl? Had he even been in a brawl? No, he hadn’t been. He would remember if he had. No matter how drunk he was, he never lost his memory. Even when others thought he would. ”How did I get here?”

”She carried you upstairs when you passed out on the floor”, Felrys answered, pointing at Erza. Natsu gulped. ”I bet you’re gonna hear about that for a long time.”

”Really _fucking_ nice.”

”Anyway, hurry up now. I’ll get Igneel’s things for you before you go.”

With his whole body trembling, Natsu got on his feet and took support from the walls. His dry mouth craved for water, but that had to wait. Nausea churned in his stomach, so he grabbed the empty bucket he had slept next to. More memories from last night crawled back. He remembered throwing up a few times and felt even more embarrassed of himself. The memory cleared more, pointing out how he threw up right in front of Lucy. He cringed as he followed Felrys to the storage room. Damn, sometimes he wished he’d actually _forge_ _t_ what happened when he was drunk.

They walked past the main chamber where the necromancers slept. There had been ten in the group, all of them tight asleep. Natsu noticed the Wood Elf woman in the same bedroll with a High Elf man, remembering the woman trying to lure him there instead. Igneel always used to tease him how incredibly bad Natsu was with women. He got their attention pretty often, probably because of his unusual hair colour, but he didn’t know _what_ to do with that attention except turn them down. Igneel had tried to give him some advice, but Natsu always lost interest and started talking about something he actually cared about. Like what kind of explosions different types of fireballs caused.

Sometimes Natsu had been sure that one day Igneel would roll his red eyes so far back that he’d go blind.

”So you’re teaching her magic?”

Natsu blinked, having to wonder for a moment who Felrys talked about. His brain worked so damn slow he wanted to bang his head to the wall. He had been so lost in thought he didn’t realise when they got to the storage room. The Dark Elf dug items from a chest in the dim candlelight, messily throwing stuff around as he searched for something specific. Natsu put the bucket to the floor, feeling better already.

”Yeah”, he answered, scratching his neck. ”She was from Helgen and lost her home and family in the dragon attack.”

”Yes, she told me.” Felrys paused his search for a moment when he found a red book. ”Teach her this spell. It’s Oakflesh. You know how it works.”

Felrys gave the book to Natsu, who recognised it as an Alteration spell. He hated that school of magic. Oakflesh wasn’t even difficult, but all his previous attempts to cast it had failed miserably. It was supposed to form a protective layer around the caster. There had been many times it would have been useful, but well, he’d rather collect scars than make an effort to learn that spell. Lucy would surely be smarter than him. She learnt everything so fast anyway.

”Damn it, I’m sure I put it somewhere in… Here!” the Dark Elf exclaimed as he pulled something white from the chest. ”That’s the thing I borrowed from Igneel years ago.”

Felrys stood up and spread his arms, showing him a long, white piece of fabric. Natsu furrowed his brows, realising it was a scarf. He had never seen Igneel wearing that, so maybe he gave it to his cousin before Natsu had joined the College.

”Our grandmother knitted scarfs for all of her grandchildren”, Felrys said, shaking his hands as he urged Natsu to pick it up. He took it tentatively, still not sure what to do with it. ”She made a green scarf for me, but I lost it somewhere.”

Natsu squinted, the white yarn exuding magic he couldn’t fully understand. ”It’s enchanted?”

”Yes. Grandmother was an enchanter from Solstheim. In fear of the eruptions of the Red Mountain, she enchanted these scarves with fire resistance. No flame can hurt you when you wear it. At least if you’re a Dunmer. You aren’t, but well, it’s still something. I hope it comes in handy, you being a fire wizard and all.”

He raised his eyes from the scarf to the Dark Elf and nodded humbly. ”Thank you.”

Natsu wrapped the scarf around his neck and felt its magic seeping through his skin. More than it. For a moment, it felt like Igneel grabbed him into a brotherly hug and patted him on the back. _’You’ve got this, brother’,_ Natsu could almost hear him say. Those had been his last words, quietly muttered before the headsman swung his axe. He stared at Felrys, his gaze hollowing as he sunk into the vivid memory of the last moment he shared with his best friend.

Natsu’s chin begun to shiver and there wasn’t a single thing in the world he could do to stop that, no matter how much he wanted to. He could still hear the sound of Igneel’s head thumping to the ground, his own scream still echoing in his ears as they dragged his writhing body to the block. The soldiers had forced him to lay his neck on his best friend’s blood, their sadistic grins saying _’I could do this all day’._

And then tears poured down his face like they did that day.

Natsu squeezed his eyes closed, not wanting to see the judgement on Felrys’s face. The man looked so much like Igneel that it wrenched his heart. Even though Igneel had been his cousin, the Dark Elf showed no sentimentality for his death, like a proper man was supposed to do. Natsu swallowed a sob, wiping the tears from his cheeks to the end of Igneel’s scarf. Fighting to keep himself from collapsing under his grief, he twisted the sorrow to the only emotion which was accepted for a man to express.

Anger.

Despite the painful sting, he opened his eyes, averting the Dark Elf’s gaze. He focused on the flame which fluttered inside the lantern, watching how it danced, slowly eating up the candle. Fire embodied the rage he felt inside – the churning, smouldering rage which would consume him to the core, just like the flame consumed the candle.

"I'll burn them to ashes", Natsu muttered under his breath. "All of them."

Felrys seemed to understand what he meant, nodding gently. "Then you shall do it. For Igneel's sake."

During that time they sat in the cold, damp forest floor, trying to hide from the dragon right after escaping Helgen, Natsu had made his mind. He’d join the Stormcloacks but didn’t know when or how. Back then, he had been in shock and his thoughts an unsolvable mess, but now everything was crystal clear. Now he knew exactly what he was supposed to do.

”Could you do something for me?” Natsu asked, already beginning to tie the loose ends in case his plan would fail. ”You were at Clavicus’s shrine, right?”

”We were. There was this thing -”

”I don’t want to know what you were doing there. You noticed the dog was missing? I kinda stroke a deal with Clavicus I probably can’t fulfil. The Daedra don’t like broken promises.”

Felrys cocked his head. ”Sounds promising.”

Natsu didn’t care about his sarcasm. ”So, if you happen to see that dog, Barbas, somewhere, could you bring it back to that shrine?”

”Why?”

”A troll attacked you there?” Natsu asked, his belief confirmed as Felrys nodded. ”That troll is actually a man who Clavicus turned into a troll. He has a son in Ivarstead waiting for his dad to come home. Clavicus will turn him back to normal if he gets Barbas back.”

”Why won’t you do that yourself?”

”Because I’ll join the Stormcloacks after I’ve brought Lucy to Winterhold.”

Felrys asked no more questions. Despite already knowing he’d hate having to tell Lucy he’d leave to the war, he didn’t see any other way he'd be able to carry on with his life. The animals who arranged Igneel’s death still roamed free, and how many other mages they would kill before someone would stop them? Eventually, they’d target the College and put everyone he knew into danger.

Only one line repeated in his head as he followed Felrys back to the sleeping chambers and found Erza and Lucy already awake, packing their things for the journey ahead.

_For Igneel’s sake._

* * *

Lucy hadn’t known there was a place so warm in Skyrim.

Lucy sat on the edge of white rock and swung her legs above a hot spring, dipping her toes to the water. Warmth embraced her tired feet. It invited her to slip out of her robes and jump into the pool, but she refused the offer for now. She had planned to bathe with Erza later tonight once the dark had fallen. It would be more relaxing that way, and the dark would hide their nakedness from their male companion. However, after spending a week with him, Lucy was sure that he wouldn’t care at all. He had already seen Lucy in her natural state and didn’t bat an eye about it. Currently, he was searching for the hottest spring with intentions to test if the scarf he got from Felrys would prevent his skin from burning.

There was about an hour of daylight left. Erza was setting up their tent. Lucy and Natsu had tried to help her once but only pissed her off, so she preferred to do it on her own. With Natsu out of sight and Erza otherwise occupied, Lucy picked up her journal. She had written every day since she got the book, finding it a good way to channel her thoughts, both bright and dark. The entry from last night was the brightest so far. Despite Natsu being a drunken fool, the evening had been great. She had gotten a new spell and robes. What else could she have wished for?

Lucy placed the inkpot next to her, trying to find the most level spot so it wouldn’t spill. The rocky ground had formed centuries ago from dried magma. There were steaming cracks on the stone, implying the area was still volcanically active. Lucy had even seen a geyser spurting from one of the springs. She dipped her quill in the ink and begun to write.

_23th of Last Seed, E4 201_

_Dear mom,  
Today we’re travelling through the volcanic tundra, which is our last stop before reaching Kynesgrove. Then we’ll part ways with Erza, but I really hope I’ll meet her again someday. I’m going to miss her._

_We walked past a giant’s camp. I didn’t know giants were so peaceful. We watched them from afar when they fed and tended their mammoths. The smell was so horrible we couldn’t stay there for long._

_I’ve eaten so many fresh jazbay grapes that my stomach hurts. You used to make a tart from them, remember? Sometimes traders brought preserved grapes to our store, but to be honest, they weren’t as good as the fresh ones here. This place is also full of creep clusters and dragon’s tongues. I picked some up in case I’ll try alchemy again someday._

_I hope you’re doing well, mom.  
Lucy_

Even though she already saw through her mind’s defence, dedicating her entries as letters to her mother eased her grief. It made her feel like she was actually telling her about their adventure. Lucy closed the inkpot and waved her hand at the page, aiding the ink to dry.

A gentle breeze blew through the tundra, making the fragrant flowers next to her tickle her sides. She picked one dragon’s tongue, adoring the deep orange colour of its large, round petals before putting it in between her journal. Every area of Skyrim had a different kind of fauna, and she thought it would be nice to pick flowers everywhere her journey took her.

”Hey Lucy, wanna see a word wall?”

Lucy flinched as the mage appeared silently behind the rocks. ”There’s one right up there. It’s not a long climb.”Natsu pointed at the hill ahead, his new, white scarf swaying in the wind.

”A word wall?” Lucy replied, her heart already racing. She had read of them but never seen a real one. ”Is it true that they have ancient dragon language written into them?”

”I don’t know, but to me it looks like huge talons clawed the stone.”

”You’ve seen them before?”

”Yeah, a few. They’re cool.”

”Okay”, Lucy answered, a smile forming on her face. ”Erza, is it okay if -”

”Go ahead”, the warrior hollered from their half-built campsite. ”Finally, a moment of peace...”

Lucy put her things into her bag and left it on the stone before she set off. She didn’t bother to put her boots on, for the ground was warm and pleasant under her bare soles. Natsu waited for her to reach him, his hands shoved in his pockets, as if hiding something.

They hadn’t trained much today. Natsu had given her the spellbook he got from Felrys while they were eating breakfast, but after that, he had been quiet and withdrawn. Lucy inferred he suffered from a decent hangover thanks to his excessive drinking last night, and wasn’t feeling well enough to train with her or even talk to her. She had chatted with Erza instead. The warrior had taught her more basics of archery today. Perhaps she could have a day off from training magic every now and then.

But now as they walked to the hill, Natsu’s silence felt wrong.

Lucy lowered her head, seeing the black fabric concealing her legs. While Natsu’s robes were actually two pieces of clothing, made from pants and a wrapped, loose cope with a large hood, Lucy’s was more like a gown with a leather belt on her thin waist. She liked it a lot. Not just how it made her look and feel a more like a mage, she liked the way _she_ looked in them. She had loved pretty clothing and dressing up back in Helgen.

Last night she had been so excited to show her new outfit to Natsu. Having a mage’s robes meant a lot to her, and she had hoped he’d acknowledge it somehow. She couldn’t deny her disappointment when he had just conked out.

”Well, did you find a spring hot enough for you?” Lucy asked with a crooked smile, trying to break the silence. There was a giant’s camp nearby, the distant grunts and the trumpeting sounds of their mammoths echoed in the air. Lucy would rather listen to his voice than be constantly reminded of the giants' close presence.

”I did”, Natsu answered and pulled up his sleeves. She was happy to hear him speak again, but couldn’t help but grimace at the painful-looking sight. His skin was red to the elbow, plagued by small blisters. ”Kept my hands in boiling water for a minute and it isn’t worse than this.”

Lucy rolled her eyes, sighing. Erza had had every right to ask if his mother dropped him as a baby. Maybe the Nightshade poisoning affected his mind or something. A normal person would have a sense of self-protection, which he clearly lacked.

”But didn’t take bath? Weakling.”

When Natsu grinned, Lucy realised he had taken her joke as a dare.

”Well, I can -”

” _Don’t_ ”, Lucy warned, trying sound as serious and stern as Erza. It didn’t really suit her. ”Doesn’t that hurt?”

The mage just shrugged, looking at his burned hands. ”A bit. But I’m used to hot things I guess.”

”Why you don’t heal them?” Lucy asked, meeting his quizzical stare. ”I mean, you healed mine. Why not treat your own wounds as well?”

”It’s a waste of magicka”, he replied. ”I’ll wear my scars with pride. They’ll remind me where I’ve been and what I’ve done.”

”Then where did you get that _huge_ scar on your side? You didn’t remember last night.”

He chuckled, seeming embarrassed to be reminded of that moment. ”A giant frost spider tried to eat me. It grabbed me between its poison fangs. I don’t know why I forgot that.”

Lucy smiled inwardly, yet the thought of getting eaten by a spider was gross. However, that image vanished when they reached the path leading up to the top of the hill. She couldn’t see the word wall from there, almost doubting if there even was one. What would it look like? Would it be a small tablet or a larger structure? It had been said that the ancient Nords built the walls in honour of important figures, and wrote funeral rhymes for their memory. At least that was what her books had said.

The climb to the top of the hill wasn’t long, just as Natsu had said. And when Lucy’s eyes caught the black, curved stone wall, she froze in awe. Natsu halted by her side and smiled.

”So, here it is.”

Lucy couldn’t answer, captured by the ominous monument. It towered towards the sky, making her tilt her head so she’d see it fully. She stepped closer, slowly and carefully as if it was just a dream which would vanish if approached. But it didn’t. It stayed there, radiating power of the ancient world, power lost long ago. It pulsated in the carvings those which Natsu had said to look like huge talons had clawed the stone. And yes, that’s how they looked. But not a bear or a sabre cat was intelligent enough to carve such markings.

Only a dragon was.

She could almost envision a majestic dragon using it’s great, sharp talons to carve the symbols into the stone itself. The dragons were not simple, mindless beasts like some Nords thought. They communicated with each other. Even their mighty roars were actually speech – Lucy had gotten a taste of that in Helgen. The dragon had been speaking, summoning the powers of fire upon its words.

Lucy touched the stone and brushed her fingers across the marks. She was sure they were words, written with the alphabet of the ancient dragons, a language extinct long ago. The ancient Nords who lived in the same time with the dragons copied their symbols, their tongue, and carved them to these walls. It felt like some ancient magic was hidden into the words, as if the reader could harness that power only if they could understand what they meant.

She couldn’t explain it, for it would sound like utter nonsense to anyone else who didn’t feel that their own hands. But it was real. Very real.

”How do you think this translates?” Lucy asked from the mage. He stood behind her, kicking the sand with his foot. How could he be bored in front of this mystery?

”Here lies a huge pile of dragon’s dung -”

”Please.”

” - shat before the First Era and petrified in time -”

”Natsu!” Lucy shrieked. ”I’m actually curious to know what’s written on this wall, you idiot.” To her, it was a puzzle to be solved, a mystery to be unravelled, not just a piece of stone.

”Well, I’m not. It probably means nothing anyway. ”

Lucy let out a frustrated sigh when the mage disappeared from her sight. Somehow he reminded her of Haming. The lumberjack’s boy had been just as dense, his sense of humour just as ’mature’. When his jokes _had_ been funny, Lucy had held back her laugh, not wanting him to know she secretly liked the stupid things he said. It would have made her question her own modesty as well.

Despite all of that, Haming had been her closest friend. She had known him as long as she could remember. Through him, Lucy had got to taste freedom she’d never have. Haming had an older brother who’d inherit the lumber mill one day, and his parents were more open-minded than her’s, letting their younger son choose whichever path of life he’d want. While Lucy’s girlfriends wanted to knit and sew and gossip about boys, Haming always brought some excitement to her dull life.

Lucy could still feel chills running down her spine when she remembered the time they picked the locks of Vilod’s house and stole a few bottles of juniper mead. Except that _’a few’_ meant a dozen. Her parents never found out about that. They spent the night drinking mead at the sawmill’s roof, gazing stars and talking about the future. Haming wanted to move to Riften once he’d come to an age, to work in Black-Briar Meadery. Lucy had felt so wistful, knowing he’d be gone in less than a year. Only if she had known it would have been better than being gone for good…

Lucy saw something pink flashing in the edge of her vision, far above the level of her head. Done visiting the past, she tore her eyes from the carved words and turned towards the mage, who was halfway up the wall.

”What are you doing!?”

”Climbing.”

”Get down from there!”

”You sound like my mom.”

Lucy clenched her fingers into fists, crossing her arms on her chest. She didn’t even want to imagine how it had been for his mother. No wonder she had worried herself to death. Natsu swung himself to the top, seating himself on the edge, not looking very stable. The wall was at least four metres high, and Lucy didn’t know any spells to heal him with if he fell.

”It looks dangerous -”

”You can see up to Windhelm from there. Wanna come too?”

Lucy bit her bottom lip, wanting to slap herself for feeling tempted to climb. There wasn’t much she could do about the writings on the wall anyway. She didn’t understand them, and that was final. At least she got to know that they existed.

”I can’t climb.”

”It’s easy. Just put your feet there, grab that stone, pull yourself up a bit, then step on that crack -”

”But what if I fall?”

”What if you don’t? C’mon, it’s a great view. You’ll regret if you miss it.”

Natsu was right. Lucy took a deep, long breath as she set herself to a position where she’d begin her climb. Following his instructions didn’t take her so far, though. Natsu was taller than her, therefore having different spots on the wall he could grasp. The amusement on his face didn’t help her at all as he watched her drain down when she lost her grip. When Lucy failed for the third time, she was about to give up, but then Natsu gave her his hand and pulled her to the top.

And the view truly took her breath away.

The sunset painted the horizon in crimson and orange shades, contrasting the distant mountains against the sky. Lucy seated herself next to the mage, clenching her fingers to the stone. The wind pushed against her back, but not strong enough to throw her over the edge. She let her eyes rest on the beauty before her. She saw walls of a city in the distance, knowing it was Windhelm. Winterhold was hidden behind the mountains, but suddenly the destination which she’d thought to be an eternity away was so frighteningly close.

Lucy found it hard to believe she’d be there so soon.

”You’ve been quiet today”, Lucy said to the mage. He leaned his chin to his burned hands, his eyes locked to the silhouette of Windhelm.

”It’s the hangover”, Natsu answered. ”Head hurts.”

”Are you sure?”

Lucy noticed how Natsu’s fingers curled into fists. He closed his eyes, pressing his chin to his chest as he sighed.

”I’ll take you to the College, but then I have to go”, Natsu whispered. ”I’ll join the Stormcloaks and avenge Igneel’s death. I just can’t move on before I know my brother’s soul can rest in peace.”

Upon his words, Lucy’s world came to a complete stop.

All out of sudden, Lucy felt a strike in her heart, as if all of her insides shrunk into a tiny, aching ball. The warmth she felt turned to ice flowing through her veins. Blankly, she stared at him and failed to hide it how her face fell.

”Don’t worry about it”, Natsu said, seeing the sadness rising to her eyes. ”We can surely hang out more when I get back. It’s not like it will take long. Ulfric will crush the Imperials in no time.”

Lucy couldn’t help but reflect the story Erza told about his father, how he had sworn to come back, but never did. The soldiers who thought of war being something fast and easy were the first ones to die. Those who promised to come back always came back in a coffin. Was she supposed to just let him go? Would this short time be the only memory she’d have of him? She didn’t even know why it felt so horribly sad. It just did.

”Aren’t you afraid?” Lucy asked quietly, finally getting words out of her mouth.

”Of what?”

”Of dying.”

Natsu lifted his shoulders, his tension slowly wearing off. That confession had to be behind his silence today, it now lifted as he had got it out. ”Why should I be? It’s not like I can decide when I’ll die. There ain’t no use worrying about the things you can’t change.”

Lucy wanted to slap him for thinking like that.

”If you decide to jump off this wall headfirst, I’m pretty sure you’ll die.”

He flashed that damn insolent smirk of his. ”You sure?”

”Don’t try it. You aren’t immortal.”

”You know, my brother used to say if I survived that Nightshade poisoning, it means that I have some sort of destiny to fulfil. If it’s my fate to die falling from this word wall, so be it. I won’t stress about it. I’ll die when I die. Meantime, I’ll live my life the way I want to.”

There was a point in that. Lucy had thought that too. Maybe his insane luck was actually fate protecting him?

”But isn’t a man the master of their own fate?” Lucy asked, wanting to lead him out of that careless belief.

”I used to think so”, Natsu started quietly. ”But if being saved by a real fucking dragon isn’t fate, I don’t know what is. I thought that was the end of the line, but if it wasn’t, it has to mean only that I was destined for something else.”

”What do you think it’ll be?”

”I don’t know, but I’m sure I won’t die before I have fulfilled whatever crap fate planned for me. Maybe it’s avenging Igneel’s death. Maybe it’s something else, but who can tell?”

Lucy smiled at him, sadly. She really hoped for the latter. ”Just be careful out there.”

”Sure.”

She turned her eyes from the mage to the horizon, not knowing what else to say. Lucy knew it wouldn’t be what Igneel would want. She hadn’t known him personally, but she was sure he’d want Natsu to keep on living. To live was to light a torch and carry it as far as you could go. If you failed, someone would relight that torch and carry it the rest of the way, in honour of you and who you were to them. Seeking vengeance would only blow that flame out once again, but Lucy knew she couldn’t make Natsu see that. There was nothing she could say to change his mind.

Feeling so helpless at the thought of losing another friend, Lucy almost wanted to pray. Pray for something to happen, something to make him stay.

But she didn’t, knowing her prayers usually came true in the worst possible ways.

* * *

**A/N: Hot springs and the Word Wall**

  


**Hope you enjoyed this chapter! So, this is the last one before big things happen. I think I've built a firm foundation for the story already with almost 50k words... :D**


	13. ONE THEY FEAR 1/2

An unknown chill replaced the empty space where the stone on his heart had been.

When the sun sank into the Sea of Ghost which glimmered far, far in the horizon, Natsu deemed it was time to head back. Twilight was falling and it would be dangerous to climb down the hill in dark. He didn’t know how long it had been since he had said the last word by then. While it probably hadn’t been much, the silence which fell after that ’ _sure’_ felt like a small eternity. Thoughts racing, conflicts rising and chest tightening, he couldn’t find anything else to say to her.

The walk back to the camp went on in the same silence, and Natsu was scared if that’s how it would be from there on. Silent, and not fun. Mammoths sounded their trumpeting snouts, a pack of wolves howled somewhere, but either of them didn’t say a single word to each other. He hadn’t thought Lucy would take it so bad. She kept averting her gaze each time Natsu tried to look at her to repair the connection he had unintentionally broken.

Igneel wasn’t lying when he said Natsu was hopeless with women.

It wasn’t like they’d have to say goodbye. Not necessarily. Natsu was sure he’d come back soon after he had turned enough Imperials into ash piles. He didn’t care what the real conflict was about. Stormcloaks believed their Nord way of life was at risk, the Empire having banned the worship of Talos and all. Ulfric aimed to make Skyrim an independent kingdom, while the Imperials thought that a united empire was better for everyone. Being a Breton himself, he couldn’t call himself ’ _a true son of Skyrim_ ’, so it didn’t matter to him. He just wanted to teach the Imperials a lesson, that was all. If it had been the Stormcloaks who executed Igneel, he’d do the same to them.

What was it so difficult about it to understand?

A campfire blazed in the darkness by the time they reached the camp. They had left the wall right on time – a black veil swallowed the world around them, even stars hadn’t lit up on the sky yet. Even the nights in this area were warm, being a pleasant change. Natsu wouldn’t have to share the tent with the women now, the warmth allowing him to sleep wherever he wanted on his own. With the mood as tight as it was, he preferred it that way.

”I was starting to worry”, Erza’s said somewhere from the night. Natsu turned towards her voice, locating it coming from the hot spring. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness he recognised a scarlet spot in the water, and her steel armour laying on the ground next to the tent. ”Feel free to join me here.”

Natsu wasn’t sure if Erza talked to him or Lucy, excepting it was the latter. He had already washed while he was away earlier today. It was strange how some of the springs were boiling hot, but others were just perfect for bathing. If he had been there with Igneel he would have enjoyed them longer, probably shared an ale or two, but now he didn’t feel like it. At least after yesterday. The warm water had made him feel more dehydrated than he already was, forcing him to wash the alcohol’s stench away from him as fast as he could. With that chore done for today, he headed to pick his bedroll. He turned away as Lucy slipped out of her robes and stepped into the spring to accompany the Companion.

Natsu didn’t bother casting the Candlelight, feeling it would make the women feel uncomfortable and exposed. He had gotten a taste of that in Ivarstead when he accidentally crashed into their room when Lucy was changing her clothes. That was one of the things which differed the most from travelling with Igneel. While they had had no trouble taking a leak side by side, travelling with women was so damn complicated compared to that. He wasn’t interested in bare female bodies, not by any means, but they probably thought by default that every man was a pervert. It just wasn’t true. At least in his case.

Lucy’s bag rested on a rock with a purple book by its side. Natsu took a better look at it, the colour already telling it was a conjuration book, but which one? She already could conjure the familiar and wouldn’t need to reread that book anymore. Natsu had to blink his eyes when he realised what that spell was. _Bound Bow._

”Hey Lucy, where did you get this spell?” he hollered over his shoulder, his throat dry after the long silence. He had given her the Oakflesh spell this morning but had no memory where she’d got this one. Bound Bow was a rare spell, and far beyond her current skill level.

”You almost puked on it.”

Natsu frowned, trying hard to memorise it. He heard distantly how Lucy carried on her conversation with Erza as he tried to dig through his memory.

”It was in the bucket? Really?” Natsu interrupted her again.

”Exactly.”

The furrow on his forehead kept deepening. ”Why would a spell this valuable be in a damn bucket?”

”How could I know?” Lucy answered, annoyance growing in her voice as Natsu didn’t let her bathe in peace. ”Felrys gave it to me, said no-one needed it anymore.”

The necromancers made no sense to him. How could they not need that spell? Oh well, they were too busy raising the dead to fight for them instead of learning to fight themselves. ”Do you understand how awesome that is?”

”I can’t even cast it in years”, Lucy sighed, failing to meet Natsu’s enthusiasm.

The mage shrugged at her, though she wouldn’t see. ”Not with that attitude.”

”I took a look at it but understood nothing.”

”Bound weapons are a bit different to conjure than creatures. I’ll show you -”

Erza shut him up with a stern threat.

”Our bath shall not be interrupted anymore or I’ll shove that book up to your arse.”

”Please don’t!” Natsu and Lucy both pleaded at the same time. ”Okay, I’ll… I’ll wait if you want to take a look at it… later...” the mage mumbled, finally allowing the women to have their peace.

Natsu sat down with the book. Reading was hard in the campfire’s dim light, so he just skimmed through the pages. He hadn’t seen a copy of that book in all of his years in the College and had met only a few who could cast it. Natsu understood why. Even he struggled to understand the instructions. It was the strongest of all conjured weapons, being an ethereal version of a Daedric bow. He wouldn’t want to get shot by it. He wouldn’t want to get shot in the first place. Igneel once got an iron arrow through his leg, and it had been nasty. His stomach still twisted a bit at the memory of pulling the arrow from bleeding flesh.

He managed to quick-read the half of it while he waited, eventually failing to concentrate on something that difficult to understand. He grasped some major points of it, but the rest remained a mystery. Maybe someone from the College would help her better, but he wanted to give it a try. Natsu saw a flash of pale skin as Lucy rose from the spring and wrapped herself into her cloak. It took her a moment to get dry and dressed in her robes before she walked to him.

”Got any insight of it?” she asked, peeking over his shoulder. Warm water dropped on him from her hair. Natsu nodded and turned the pages to the beginning.

”Here’s a quick summary of using bound weapons”, he said, keeping his finger on the text. ”When you conjure creatures, you have to… form a connection with them, kind of. But when you conjure objects you have to own them. The creatures are beings of their own, but these weapons are yours, and yours only.”

Natsu opened his left hand, casting the portal on his palm. He closed his fingers around the purple light as the blue, ghostly dagger passed through. There was nothing new about it to him, but Lucy’s eyes widened. He doubted she had never seen an ethereal weapon before. It was admirable how she got excited like a little child from the magic she explored. The things which had become dull and boring to him were new and amazing to her. Sometimes he forgot that.

”I like to imagine that Oblivion is the shelf where I keep this thing”, Natsu said as the purple light faded, leaving only the dagger in his hand. His magicka felt already drained, a reminder of why he didn’t use that too often. Using ethereal weapons was costly and exhausting. ”I take it from there when I need it and put it back when I don’t. Except that this will expire in a few minutes on its own, but anyway.”

Lucy stared at the blade, its colours dancing in her dark eyes. ”It looks sharp.”

”It is. Lightweight too”, Natsu answered, spinning it around at ease, the dagger being as heavy as a feather. ”But I just like fire more, you know? Using this costs a lot of magicka. Usually, when I’m close enough to use a dagger, I don’t have any magicka left.”

”Yeah, it doesn’t suit your battle strategy.”

”Definitely not. But at least I’ll never lose or break it if I ever need a weapon. To be honest, I’ve used this only to fillet fish.”

Natsu heard a muffled chuckle coming from her, but it was true. He couldn’t remember a time he had used it on an enemy.

”But the logic is the same with that bow, right?” Lucy asked. ”It’s just a bow that’s stored in Oblivion?”

”Yeah, that’s about it.”

”It is harder than it sounds like.”

”Don’t worry about it too much now. One day you’ll be able to cast it.”

Natsu closed his fist, making the dagger disappear. It made him worry about the fate of his orcish dagger. He would need to show it to a blacksmith before it could be used again. Erza would be on her way tomorrow, releasing them of her extremely strict travelling schedule. Natsu planned to stop in Windhelm on their way to Winterhold. Lucy would probably like to see the Palace of Kings up close, and they had some gold to spend at the marketplace, too.

And as his thoughts circled back to Lucy, Natsu realised she had grown silent once again. He glanced at her, finding her staring blankly at the book, not reading it. Her eyes gleamed in the dark, watering almost. Something made her sad.

”What’s up?” Natsu asked, keeping his voice low. She didn’t answer, not even with a comforting lie. The chill kept spreading on his chest, just when he thought he had chased it away. When Lucy closed the spellbook and turned away, Natsu realised _he_ made her sad. The reason behind her sadness was the same reason behind the chilling ache growing inside of him.

Just how could he convince her he _wasn’t_ going to die? Only one idea came to his mind.

”I’ll see you using that spell. I promise.”

Natsu felt a strike in his heart when Lucy smiled, knowing it was forced and fake. Was he really going to charge right into his death in the name of his deceased friend, ignoring and forgetting those who were still alive?

Suddenly, he wasn’t sure about anything at all.

* * *

An owl’s hoot pulled Erza out of her nightmares.

She stooped up, her head hitting the wall of the leather tent. Cold sweat covered her face and chest, making her undershirt glue against her skin. For a moment she feared the rapid beating of her heart would break through her steel armour, but gladly it began to calm down as she listened to the owl’s calls which echoed in the early morning.

Erza had dreamt of a dragon, the same nightmare she had seen a hundred times before.

Sure she couldn’t be the only one having nightmares about dragons in this turning of age, she shook her head, trying to collect herself before Lucy would wake up to her rumbling. Lucy slept her nose buried in that spellbook – she had read it until she had passed out. The mage had chosen to sleep under the stars, and Erza hadn’t argued against it. Slowly she crawled out of the tent to get a breath of fresh air. Her dream kept replaying in her vision, the mighty black beast grabbing Jellal between its jaws and swallowing him whole. She had never seen a real dragon, only drawings and paintings of them. Her mind’s presentation was probably false, but it was terrifying enough.

Erza sat on the ground and looked around to find the owl. And there it was, perched on the branch of an ancient pine. Glowing blue light, it calmed Erza’s raging heart in a second. It was Jellal’s owl, messaging her that he was still alive. Sometimes he didn’t even send a note, only the owl, to tell her he was alright. A warm smile spread on her lips, the horror of her dream fading away as she listened to the owl’s song.

”Fucking birds won’t let me sleep.”

Erza flinched, almost falling to the hot spring when the mage appeared behind her. Looking grumpy and tired he relit the campfire, allowing some light to the world before the dawn would break. The owl flit from the branch and withered into tiny blue particles as it crossed the liminal bridge between two worlds. Erza rarely had so hard time holding back the urges to smack someone. If she did, she’d have to explain to him why. He already knew too much, thanks to their drunken conversation in Windhelm.

How could she have been so intoxicated she slipped out her biggest secret to a perfect stranger? She’d swear it had never happened before, not even in Jorrvaskar when she had been more drunk than that night. If none of her dearest friends knew, why had she told _him_? And how in the Oblivion could he still _remember_ it?

She bit her lip as she moved to the fire. The dawn was still some time away, but she didn’t bother getting back to sleep. Natsu probably felt the same. He took a piece of bread and dried meat from his bag to break his fast. Erza wasn’t hungry, but she sat there with him, trying to think of something to say. Only the crepitating melody of grasshoppers sounded in the night.

”Lucy’s mad at me”, Natsu suddenly mumbled, his mouth half-full with dry bread. Erza raised her brow, and he swallowed with a sip of water before he continued. ”How do I stop her from being mad?”

”Depends on why she’s mad.”

The mage chewed more dried meat, the silence lasting long enough Erza thought he would never answer.

”Because I told her I’ll join the Stormcloaks and she thinks I’ll die, but I won’t.”

”You goddamn moron”, Erza sighed, burying her face into her palm. She had seen yesterday how upset Lucy had been, but she hadn’t mentioned that, not even with a single word. ”She’s obviously mad at you because she doesn’t want to lose any more people, Natsu!”

”But I’m not going to -”

”Every fucking soldier says that, and then they die. She knows that. And you aren’t a soldier. You don’t have the slightest piece of discipline. As a soldier, you have to obey orders, which you just can’t do.”

How ironic it was that she had talked about her father yesterday for the first time in years. She had grown up in the shade of her father’s decision and wouldn’t wish the same for anyone. Only a complete fool would join a war voluntarily. She was certain of that.

”I won’t let them get away from what they did”, Natsu replied stubbornly, unable to argue her.

”The civil war has nothing to do with your friend’s death. If you want someone dead, do it yourself or… or perform the black sacrament or something, whatever suits you best.”

Erza immediately realised she shouldn’t have said that when the mage’s eyes sparked.

”Having the Dark Brotherhood assassinate them?” Natsu asked, grinning and rubbing his chin. ”You have an idea. Tell that to the fiance of yours, save me from the trouble of doing the sacrament.”

Erza shook her head as blood rushed to her cheeks. ”I don’t have a fiance -”

”You know what? You’re a horrible liar.” The mage smirked and Erza cursed him in her mind. ”How have you managed to keep it secret all these years?”

”I don’t know what you’re talking about -”

”His name was Jellal, right?”

Erza sighed, burying her face into her hands again. Trying to lie to him now was pointless. He knew, and that was final. The damage was already done.

”… for fuck’s sake.”

”Look, I don’t care who you are with. I’m not here to judge you”, Natsu said. He finished eating and drank the rest of his water. ”Be it a guy from the Brotherhood, a vampire, or a Daedric Lord, I don’t give a shit. People should be free to choose their partners.”

”It would be great, though”, Erza replied quietly. How many times had she wished that? ”But there isn’t that kind of freedom in this world.”

Natsu added more wood to the campfire to prevent it from dying. The darkness around them had faded into blue, and birds had started singing to mark the breaking of the dawn. For a moment Natsu stared into the flames like they were a god. Erza wondered if he saw something in the flames no-one else could see but didn’t bother to ask.

”What would happen if someone found out?” Natsu asked, still looking into the fire.

”The Jarl’s men would probably torture the sanctuary's location out of me, and then have me executed for treason”, Erza answered. That’s why Jellal never told her where the Brotherhood's hiding place was – he had made it rather clear what would happen to her, and everyone else. ”Dark Brotherhood was once the most feared organization in all of Tamriel, but now there’s only one sanctuary left. All the others have been destroyed. They’re barely hanging by a thread, fighting for their mere existence.”

Natsu raised his gaze from the campfire and looked straight into Erza. Was that compassion in his eyes? Erza wasn’t sure. Maybe.

”That must suck”, he said. ”Not being able to see who you care about.”

Erza smiled faintly. ”It does.”

Natsu’s brow furrowed as he sunk into his thoughts, trying to form a proper idea before speaking it out. ”Why don’t you, uhm, make him wear a mask or something? It’s not like anyone could recognise him. Everyone who has seen his face is probably dead. Give him a fake name and a fake backstory. A disguise. Say that he’s your friend from High Rock. No-one would doubt it. That way you could meet him in public and do… whatever couples do, I don’t know, but it could work.”

” _Whatever couples do?_ ”

”Yeah? My parents used to go fishing together. Isn’t that what couples do?”

Erza wanted to laugh, the poor boy still not realising that his parents were never actually fishing. Jellal’s parents always went to feed the goats at night and so on… Ignorance was bliss Natsu never grew out from.

”Fishing? Well, there are many ways to put that I guess...”

”Doesn’t really matter anyway, that’s none of my concern, but wouldn’t it be cool if you could be able to just… I don’t know, walk down the city streets with him? When the rules aren’t fair, you gotta cheat.”

Erza hid her smile. He actually had an idea – sometimes he could be smart if he just tried. In his own way at least.

”You know, I’ll kill you if you tell anyone”, the warrior said to him, half-joking, half-serious.

”I might have told Lucy.”

Erza rolled her eyes, crossing her arms on her chest as Natsu laughed nervously. She wasn’t surprised.

”Anyone else?”

”Igneel probably overheard our discussion back then, but it’s not like he’ll gossip about it now.”

”Well, that’s acceptable, I guess.” Erza said. ”It’s actually… good that at least someone knows. Secrets can be… hard to carry alone.”

Natsu didn’t say anything. Erza heard quiet movement behind them. It was Lucy who crawled out of the tent. The first rays of the dawn pierced through the blue moment.

”Good morning”, she said. ”Did I oversleep again?”

”Not at all”, Erza answered. ”Come, let’s eat breakfast before we leave. We’ll reach Kynesgrove at noon if we hurry, giving us enough daylight to explore the burial site.”

And now as she realised today would be the day, fear crept back to her heart. No matter what they would find there, she had to stay brave. Jellal had promised to keep her safe, but he wasn’t there now. He could never be.

She just wished he could.

* * *

_There ain’t no use worrying about the things you can’t change._

For the entire morning, Lucy kept repeating that thought in her mind. The realization came to her while she slept, her emotions drifted to the background as reason replaced them. She had woken up to Natsu’s laughter and realised there was no point in being sad for him. He wasn’t sad about it either. If his choice to join the war made him happy, who was she to stop him? And maybe he was right. Maybe he wouldn’t die. He’d come back and then they could be friends again. Or then Lucy would have moved on and made other friends in the College. Whatever was going to happen, Lucy was now sure that all would go exactly as it was supposed to go.

Lucy rested her eyes on the road. The volcanic area was coming to an end, the trees now growing taller and thicker than before. She could see the silhouette of Windhelm in the distance. If they kept their stop in Kynesgrove brief they’d make it to the city tonight. Lucy had never been in a city so big. Whiterun was the largest settlement she had visited in her life. She was excited to see the old City of Kings, but she hoped Erza would be there with them. So, preparing to say goodbye, Lucy clung to Erza’s side, trying to get the most out of the time they had left.

”Kynesgrove is right behind that hill”, Erza said, pointing forward. ”There ain’t much to see. The Braidwood Inn serves as a resting place for travellers and those who work in the malachite mine. I’ll go drop my things there first before checking the dragon’s grave.”

Lucy nodded. ”What do you expect to find?”

”Well, there’s this thing I heard...” the warrior sighed, her tone suddenly low. ”All the mounds of the East are found empty. Their remains are gone. In the worst-case scenario, they’re flying in the sky while we speak.”

Lucy stared at Erza with widened eyes. Chills ran down her spine. ”Really? Empty? Just… how?” One dragon had been terrifying enough, but what if there was more?

”I don’t know. I’m hoping it’s just bandits digging up the dragon bones. Whatever it is, we might find out today.”

”Bandits?” Natsu joined the conversation, having walked behind them in silence for a while now. ”No way. It has to be giants!”

”Giants?” Lucy wondered.

”Yeah. They discovered that dragon bone is harder than mammoth bone, that’s why they’re digging them up. That way they get better clubs. That’s my theory, and I’m pretty sure of it.”

”We’ll see about that soon enough”, Erza answered, her tone making it clear she didn’t believe him. As a Companion, she had dealt with giants multiple times and surely knew more about their behaviour than the mage.

Lucy imagined a dragon’s rib bone used as a giant’s club, and it was quite fitting, to be honest. However, she didn’t support his theory either. From what she had observed yesterday and today, the giant’s weren’t the most intelligent of creatures. She had no theory of her own, only curiosity to find out how the burial mounds became to be empty.

They arrived in Kynesgrove at midday. People were busy working in the mine and the crops, no-one paying any attention to the visitors. The innkeeper was the only idle one, polishing the cups and tankards as the three of them stepped into the inn. Erza rented herself a room while Natsu and Lucy ate a late lunch. Lucy had a bowl of cheesy vegetable soup and Natsu devoured a roasted goat’s leg. He had a bottomless stomach, it seemed, Lucy feeling full just looking at him stuffing the meat into his mouth.

After everyone had eaten, Lucy left her backpack in Erza’s room, only taking her bow and arrows with her. She had grown more familiar with her weapon over the last few days, but she hadn’t used it in real combat yet, excluding the trolls in the mountain pass. If she counted right she had ten arrows left. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing.

When they stepped out, it seemed like the night had already fallen, even though the sunset was hours away. The skies had grown dark, stormclouds eclipsing the sun. Silence had fallen, the song of the birds ceased.

”Strange how fast the weather changed”, Erza pointed out. ”I’m sure it was clear before we got in.”

”It’s always like this in the north”, Natsu answered, not affected by Erza’s concern. ”A snowstorm is coming. If it hits, we’ll stay here for the night, right, Lucy?”

Lucy agreed. The taste she had of a snowstorm back in the mountains had been enough. She almost hoped it would start to snow. That way she’d got to spend another evening with Erza and delay the goodbyes.

The burial mound was uphill from the inn, deep in the pine forest. Erza asked from the miners along the way if they had seen any suspicious activity there, and the answer was no. The people of Kynesgrove thought of the grave as a fraud. The dragons were nothing more than a way to scare insolent children. _’There’s no way the dragons could still exist’,_ an old miner had said. _’They say Helgen got hit by one, but I won’t believe it until_ _I see it_ _with my own eyes.’_

Lucy wrapped the cloak tighter around herself as they climbed up, the air growing colder each step. It didn’t feel like an upcoming blizzard to her, but an upcoming thunder. It was like a cloud of pressuring mist had fallen on earth, heavy and suffocating.

Suddenly she remembered feeling exactly like that once before.

Lucy halted, causing the mage and the warrior to turn towards her.

”What is it?” Erza asked. Lucy shook her head, forcing the distressing thoughts away from her mind.

”Nothing”, she answered. ”Let’s keep going.”

While Erza nodded and carried on, Natsu’s quizzical gaze stayed on her a moment longer. Lucy didn’t say anything to him as she hurried after Erza. She was excited to see the dragon’s grave too, and wouldn’t want to miss it if the storm would really hit.

But then a gush of wind threw her off her feet.

Too terrified to let out a single sound, Lucy caught Natsu’s sleeve as she fell, pulling him down with her. The rapid flow of air forced Erza to crouch to keep her balance. Lucy turned her head to see the mage, the fearful look in his eyes embodying the thing they both already realised. A shadow flashed over them as black wings covered the skies, each wingstroke pushing air forward like a cyclone. Lucy clenched her nails to the ground, holding onto something as her mind tried to make sense of the thing flying towards the burial site. And when it screeched, Lucy knew what it was.

A dragon.

Lucy held her breath and watched as the dragon stopped on top of the hill, flapping its wings to stay still. Stony, black scales covered its skin, so thick nothing would penetrate them. Large horns grew on its head and a trail of spikes followed down its spine, and its talons were as long as Lucy’s arms. Lucy had seen it before, there was no doubt of it. It was the same dragon which had attacked Helgen. Natsu got up and helped Lucy on her feet. The two of them hurried to Erza who sat on the ground, petrified from fear. Lucy flinched as she saw the warrior’s eyes blank, her face pale as milk.

”Get up now”, Natsu said to the Companion, lending his hand out for her. ”Come on! There’s no time to waste!”

Erza didn’t even blink as a reply. Her horrified stare was locked on the black dragon, her entire body shaking and her voice quiet as a whisper as she finally spoke.

”This… This is it. Sovngarde… awaits...”

Natsu slapped her as she refused to take his hand. Her head swung to the side, submissive and weak. Lucy hadn’t even imagined she’d ever see her so hopelessly terrified.

”That’s how Nord heroes went to Sovngarde? Like cowards?” the mage hissed, trying to sound as serious as he could without drawing the dragon’s attention. ”No! They faced their deaths with courage and earned their place in that fucking mead hall!”

Erza shook her head frantically. ”Are you blind? There’s… There’s no way we can kill that thing! There’s no way we can escape from it! We’re dead! Dead!”

”Then prove your mettle in battle and die fighting, that’s the Erza I know!” Natsu shouted now. Shivering from fear, Lucy glanced at the flying beast. It hadn’t noticed them, or if it had, it didn’t care. ”But me and Lucy, we’ve faced that thing before and we lived to tell about it. So come on, let’s see what the fuck it’s doing up there!”

Natsu grabbed Erza’s left hand while Lucy took the right, and together they pulled her on her feet. She tried to resist, her legs getting limp and weak, her heavy armour not making it any easier to help her. They carried her off the road and hid behind a large rock. Sobbing, Erza collapsed to the ground when they let go of her. Lucy could barely breathe. If a brave Companion was paralyzed from fear, what could she do?

Lucy caught Natsu’s sleeve again as they peeked to see the grave and the creature circling above it. A pillar of light rose skyward from the burial mound, resonating power so ancient and obscure. The word wall yesterday had resonated the same magic, the magic of the dragons. Lucy noticed how Natsu’s hands quivered – even his insane courage was starting to crumble. Did they survive Helgen only to die a week later in another dragon attack?

The dragon spoke, chanting words a human couldn’t understand. Lucy’s lungs trembled as the low, growling sound resonated inside of her.

” _ **Sahlkoniir, ziil do doval ulse! Slen Tiid Vo!”**_

Lucy’s heart skipped a beat when the dragon’s shout shattered the stone lid covering the grave. Rocks flew through the air as strange power emerged from the ground. Gigantic bones crawled out from the hole, forming the shape of another dragon. As flesh and scales began to rejuvenate around the skeleton, it replied to the black dragon.

” _ **Alduin, thuri! Boaan tiid vokriiha suleyksejun kruziik?”**_

The dragon on the ground turned its head towards their hiding place, and Lucy pressed herself against the mage as the dragon’s hollow eyesockets found her.

It was like Helgen all over again.

Except worse.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed the first part of this chapter! Sorry, I left it in a cliffhanger, I promise to write the next part fast. The second part will be one big battle scene and I thought it would be overwhelming if this would have been like 10k long one chunk. What do you think it's going to happen next?**


	14. ONE THEY FEAR 2/2

_How many days had it been? Natsu had lost count. Maybe three or four. He leaned against the wooden bench and lowered his eyes to avoid the sun’s burning rays. The last stop had been before the sunrise, and so nausea had cumulated to the point where he thought he’d die before the execution. Or maybe that’s what they tried, to drive a motion sick man to death so they wouldn’t be the ones to blame._

_And as he felt bile rising up his throat again, he turned around to vomit, scarlet fluid flooding from his mouth to the ground. Exhausted, he let his head hung on the other side of the cart and watched how the cobbled stones and mountain flowers ran beneath him. He had grown familiar to that sight lately._

” _Again? Ugh”, Igneel commented scornfully._

_If Natsu had any strength left, he’d punch him. ”Fuck you.”_

” _I’d give you water if I had any.”_

_Natsu scoffed. ”And if our hands weren’t tied, idiot.”_

_He was dying for a drink to wash the taste of iron from his mouth with. When they stopped to water the horses, each prisoner was given bread and drink and a chance to take a piss. Why such hospitality if they’d all be killed anyway? However, the small meals he had ended up on the side of the road as soon as the carts moved again. He’d never known why, but every time he travelled by a horse carriage, his insides twisted into a miserable mess and he threw up endlessly until the cart would stop._

” _Don’t worry”, Igneel said, his tone calm and empathetic.”It’ll be over soon.”_

_Natsu raised his gaze from the ground. The city walls rose at the end of the road with Legion banners wavering in the wind. Igneel had meant his suffering would be over soon, but his life would end at the same. And after the long days of torture, Natsu was almost eager to die. That way it would be guaranteed he’d never have to travel again._

_Igneel pulled him up, the momentum feeling like his brains slid into the back of his skull. Natsu mumbled silent curses and didn’t mind the stares he got from the two soldiers sitting on the other side of the cart. He wasn’t supposed to be there, he knew. He wasn't a rebel. Maybe the Imperial captain would change their mind about his sentence. His crimes had nothing to do with the damn war anyway. The Jarl of Riften was supposed to be his judge, not the Legion. Five or ten years in prison would’ve been the most likely punishment. Natsu had once said he’d rather die than go to prison, but now that he was actually going to die, he wasn’t so sure about it anymore._

_Well, there was nothing he could do about it now._

_One of the Stormcloak rebels chanted the names of the Divines, but none one the Eight would come to his aid. Natsu knew that. There was no point in asking help from things which didn’t even exist. One could as well pray for a fucking dragon to come and save them, the result would be the same. The guards opened the city gates as the carts drove in. Natsu had never been in Helgen before, but the stone walls and towers somehow reminded him of Dragonbridge and Solitude. Funny how Imperial cities used to make him feel so safe when he had been a boy._

_The carriage slowed its pace, and his nausea eased a bit. He let the buildings pass before his eyes, nothing particular catching his attention. The citizens were living their life as usual and had grown used to these macabre shows the Legion kept arranging for them. Parents gathered their children indoors as if walls and shutters would protect them from what was happening in this country. What would they feel if their sons and daughters were sitting in the carts instead? Natsu didn’t know why he wondered that. What would his father think if he’d know where his son was headed? Would they even let his father know he’d been killed?_

_For the smallest moment Natsu regretted not staying in touch with dad, but the thought was gone as quickly as it had come. Natsu noticed how people stopped to stare, their eyes fixated on Ulfric Stormloack sitting in the first cart, bound and gagged. While not everyone had seen him before, rumours of him had spread all across Skyrim. Today he’d be the top attraction of the damn show. More faces appeared to the windows and porches, making Natsu feel almost famous._

_A thunder rumbled somewhere in the distance when Natsu glanced at Igneel. The Dark Elf stared at his own feet, his copper brown hair covering his face. He had fallen deep into his thoughts, but Natsu wasn’t in a mood for conversation either. There was nothing left to say anymore. Natsu had already said his last wish, and it was to be the first of them to die. Igneel had accepted that. There wasn’t much Natsu feared in life, but after witnessing mother’s death he didn’t want to lose anyone before his own eyes again._

_Behind his friend, Natsu saw a young woman in a yellow dress looking at the prisoners. She leaned to the wooden parapet, autumn wind swaying her fair hair. Natsu didn’t know why, but somehow she looked dissociated from the scene, like she did not belong there. Like a swan amongst the chicken. Suddenly the girl turned to look at him, their eyes meeting for a brief second until Natsu turned his head away. He didn’t know why he had looked at her for so long. Maybe it was just a distraction for a mind which would soon be dead, but either way, it didn’t matter anymore. The carts stopped at the plaza and soldiers commanded the prisoners to get up._

_The commander found their names in the list and send them to the line. Natsu’s legs tingled as blood flowed back to them after long sitting. He stood by Igneel’s side with a strange calmness in his heart. He’d soon be gone, but it wasn’t that bad. The life he had lived had been full. Short, but full. His lips almost twitched into a smile when he thought of the adventures he had with his best friend. Somehow he had always known they’d die together, side by side as brothers. The Legion captain told the priestess of Arkay to give the prisoner their last rites._

” _As we commend your souls to Aetherius, the blessings of the Eight upon you, for you are the salt and the earth of Nirn, our beloved -”_

” _For the love of Azura, shut up and let’s get this over with!” Igneel shouted. The priestess lowered her arms, nodded and prayed no more. Igneel, of all of them, had no use for her prayers._

_And suddenly, everyone’s heads turned towards the Dark Elf. Natsu felt his chest tightening as the captain grinned._

” _As you wish”, the commander said and soldiers came to grab Igneel from arms, despite he wasn’t the first on the line. Pure terror pumped through Natsu’s heart as he was left behind and realised what would happen next. He wouldn’t let that happen! His hands were tied behind his back, but it didn’t stop him from fighting. He squirmed, writhed and kicked with all his might. More soldiers came to hold him still as he screamed them to stop, to take him instead, but they did not listen. Igneel’s eyes found his once more._

” _You’ve got this, brother”, Igneel whispered as the soldiers pressed him to the block. The sound of thunder got buried under Natsu’s desperate shout. Tears blinded his vision as they flooded down his face, and he despised himself for letting his tears be the last thing Igneel would ever see._

_And a single swing of an axe was all it took to tear a young man’s heart into a million tiny shreds._

_As Igneel’s head dropped to the ground, everything in Natsu’s world went blank. The rapid beating in his chest came to a perfect still, leaving only the throbbing, wrenching pain behind. Suddenly and without a warning, everything came to an end. He had wanted to die bravely, not crying like a baby. The peaceful death he had wished for became nothing more than a youthful, naive lie, violently torn away right in front of his very own eyes. They dragged Igneel’s headless corpse away like he was nothing but slaughtered cattle._

_The soldiers dissolved into the white fog, blood turned colourless and all noises around him faded. Only the ringing in his ears remained. Someone grabbed him by the neck and dragged him forward in the mist, laid him down, a pressure on his back keeping him from writhing away. It had to be a soldier’s boot, the steel as cold as their fucking hearts._

_Thunder rumbled somewhere in the distance again, the only sound reaching through the senseless humming. It brought him back to the moment. He opened his eyes, tilted his head to the side to face the headsman and his greataxe. A shape of a tower formed from the whiteness behind the man. Natsu’s eyes followed the axe as it rose from the ground, his gaze catching a strange shadow in the sky. It grew larger and larger, spreading its wings as it landed on the watchtower, the entire plaza staggered by its impact. When did ravens become so big? Since when did they have horns?_

_But when its mighty roar pierced through Natsu’s bones, he knew it wasn’t a raven._

_The screech tore the axe from the headsman’s hands. It dropped and missed Natsu’s head by mere inches. Frozen and numb, he stared at the winged creature, feeling absolutely nothing. Everyone around him screamed, shouted commands, called for the archers, but not a single thought crossed his mind. Stone and wood came grumbling down and fire spread from the creature’s mouth, setting everything on its way ablaze. Paralyzed, he stared at the destruction, but it failed to evoke any fear in him._

_Why should he be afraid when the worst possible thing had already happened to him?_

_Then the creature shouted again, and a sudden gust of wind threw him around like a lifeless ragdoll. His head smashed to the rocky ground. For a brief moment, the whiteness faded into black, until another shout reached through the dark. A human’s shout._

” _Rise!”_

_A knife cut through the rope around his wrists. Natsu rolled around and saw a young, brown-haired man with a dagger in his hand. The man ran through the flames and the smoke before Natsu could thank him. Natsu stood up on trembling legs and stared around, finding absolutely nothing to grasp on. He stretched his arms which ached from the days of being bound behind his back. The creature soared right over him, breathing fire like a dragon from the children’s storybook._

_Except that it wasn’t_ like _a dragon. It_ was _a dragon._

_What in the Oblivion was going on?_

_In a matter of a few minutes, the dragon had turned the lively town into a fiery pit of chaos. The store he had passed by was now in ruins, so was the inn next to it. Only charred corpses were left of the busy people he had just seen, and those who were still alive ran around in panic, hysterically screaming the names of their loved ones. The children cried, dogs howled, horses galloped frantically searching for a safe place. Natsu’s eyes caught something under the collapsed wall; the fair hair of the girl who had stood on the porch, watching him, looking like she didn’t belong there. Like a swan amongst the chicken._

_And when the girl moved her hand, Natsu realised that she didn’t belong under that burning wood either. No-one else noticed she was still alive. Everyone focused on their own survival, too scared to risk their lives to help her. But Natsu had nothing left to lose. He was already past the time he was supposed to die, so why not give it a try? He was still alive, still existing, and had to use that for something better than standing frozen in the middle of chaos._

_She became the catalyst to move him out of that still, paralyzed point. The red string to follow on. It wasn’t much, she could die the second he’d get her out, but it was something. Natsu took the first step and then another, still weak and powerless under the weight of the immeasurable loss. He kept moving forward until he reached the girl, dodging the flying rocks and flames along his way._

_He wouldn’t watch anyone die in front of his eyes anymore, and so he grabbed her arm and pulled._

_"Hey, girl, wake up. Wake up now. We have to get out of here."_

* * *

When the dragon’s hollow eyes found them, only one thought entered Natsu’s mind. He wouldn’t let that red string slip through his fingers, no matter what it would take. The decision he had made in Helgen still kept.

He wouldn’t watch anyone else die.

Acting out of his instinct, Natsu pulled Lucy behind the rock right before the dragon opened its mouth and breathed fire. Flames surrounded the stone, turning the air so intensely hot it burned his lungs. With his heart drumming in his throat he tried to come up with a strategy to survive this. The black dragon glided over them and spoke again.

” **Nivahriin jorre, dir ko maar!”**

Natsu didn’t know what it meant, but the tone in its voice resonated pure arrogance as if they were only insects on its way. The light circling around the dragon’s grave faded out, the ceremony or whatever it was doing now over. Its deed now done, the dragon rose above the trees and veered towards the mountains.

”What the fuck? It’s just leaving?” Natsu whispered and watched as if flew east, faster than anything he’d ever seen. It disappeared from his sight, but he wasn’t relieved. Not at all.

”One dragon is better than two”, Lucy answered. ”But what will we do?”

The ground quaked as the dragon behind them took its first steps in a thousand years. The mine’s entrance opened as people rushed out to see what was going on, their faces growing pale as their eyes found the dragon. The man who had sworn he wouldn’t believe dragons existed until he’d see one with his own eyes, was there too, with his breeches now wet.

Natsu pressed his back against the stone. Erza curled up in a hopeless ball at their feet, sobbing her heart out of fear. The mage had never seen anyone being so afraid, but he could understand why. There were many terrifying things in Skyrim – ice wraths, walking skeletons, giant spiders and giants, but none of them compared against a dragon. Natsu had absolutely no idea what to do. Should they run? Should they hide? Or should they fight?

”It will destroy Kynesgrove first, and then head to Windhelm”, Natsu replied quietly, the words coming to his mouth without thinking. ”And that’s bad. Like really fucking bad.”

Lucy crouched to pat Erza’s back. The warrior didn’t seem to hear what they were talking about. ”I know, but what do we -”

”We fight that thing.”

”How!?”

There was only one thing he knew. If that dragon had been put to its grave once before, it could be done again. ”I’ve my magic and this dagger”, Natsu said. ”You have your ten arrows. Better make them count.”

Natsu peeked behind the stone again, the dragon’s focus now on the miners. It was a lot smaller than the big black one, but still larger than a mammoth. Its bones collected muscles around them, and green scales formed as their shield. Where there had been only a bare skull a minute ago was now a living dragon’s head, it’s eyes now as black as the night. The beast kept crawling forward, pulling itself with its wing bones – and Natsu realised one important thing.

”It cannot fly before its wings are restored”, Natsu said to Lucy, who replied with a nod. She had released her bow from the straps and searched for her arrows. ”We have to kill it while it’s down, or we’re doomed.”

Without hesitating furthermore, Natsu summoned a flame atronach on the beast’s way and sprinted to the road. The men who stood on the base of the hill had no fighting experience, especially against a dragon, but all of them had pickaxes. That counted as something. There wasn’t much he and Lucy alone could do to a dragon when Erza was paralyzed from fear.

”Don’t just stand there doing nothing!” Natsu shouted at the miners, who barely seemed to hear him. ”One of you dumb fucks runs to Windhelm right now to get the guards and soldiers over here!”

There were a dozen men but only the youngest of them, a boy probably at Natsu’s age, nodded back to him. He tossed the pickaxe away, turned around and ran as fast as he could – and Natsu only hoped he’d head to Windhelm instead of chickening away. Even in the best case it would take a while for soldiers to arrive, and everyone’s effort was needed to keep the beast at bay until then. But none of the men did a fucking thing.

”Pick your fucking axes and fight!”

Natsu heard a snarling sound behind him, and all the miners ran away screaming. He froze, the ground quaking at the rhythm of the fast-approaching steps.

” _ **Yol Thoor Shul!”**_

Just before he got caught in the inferno, he crouched and raised his arms to cover his body. A shield of blue magic formed from his command, the Steadfast Ward, a restoration spell he so rarely used. He kept it up as flames surrounded him into an embrace more hot and intense than anything he’d ever known. The boiling hot spring was cold compared to dragonfire – and as he felt his magicka draining, he knew he couldn’t risk lowering his guard anymore. Sweat ran down his forehead as the fire dissolved. He patted the hem of his robe to smother the sparkles so they wouldn’t spread. If not for Igneel’s scarf, nothing but ashes would be left of him.

His atronach was gone – while fire didn’t work on flame atronach, nothing matched a dragon’s physical strength. Nothing. The beast had probably just picked the atronach into its mouth and grind it into dust. While he couldn’t risk getting too close to its fangs and talons, he couldn’t stay too far either or he’d get caught in its fire. The dragon had to be distracted, but how?

”Natsu!” Lucy shouted, the beast immediately turning its ugly head towards her.

Definitely _not_ like that.

Natsu put his hands together and cast a firebolt, painfully aware of how much more costly dual casting was. While it made the spell much more powerful, it came with a price. Natsu aimed and threw the flaming ball towards the dragon, the beast staggering as it exploded on its side. As he had intended, it lost interest in Lucy and focused solely on him again. It stared at the mage, the brief moment facing that beast eye to the eye feeling like an eternity.

The dragon inhaled air and Natsu jumped sideways, rolling on the ground as the beast exhaled fire right where he had just stood. He had no time to stand up, for the dragon stroke its wings at him, a cloud of dust puffing into the air. Blindly, he crawled out of the road and into the forest. He breathed heavily as he took support from the tree as he rose up.

The dust settled, letting Natsu see how far he had stranded from Lucy and Erza. They were left alone on the other side of the road. On the other side of a dragon. As its tail swung in front of him Natsu understood the dragon was facing them now. Silently, Natsu cursed at himself and created another firebolt.

”Hey you ugly, overgrown lizard! Leave them alone!” he shouted and launched the firebolt. It struck on the dragons back, the creature staggering as it exploded. But besides that, there was no damage. Not a scale had bent, not even a drop of blood shed. Was it resistant to flames?

” _ **I see that mortals have become arrogant while I slept.**_ _ **”**_

Staggered, Natsu could not believe what he had heard. The dragon’s deep, growling voice formed words of a human tongue, directed straight at him. Quickly, Natsu glanced at Lucy, her expression equally shocked.

”You can fucking speak!?”

” _ **Of course I can! I am Sahlkonir! Hear my voice and despair!”**_

An arrow flew past him and struck the dragon’s wing, piercing through the half-restored skin. Natsu turned and saw the innkeeper standing next to her inn, holding a fully drawn bow in her hands. Though the mist blurred most of her, Natsu could see her wearing nothing but her brown dress. Her arms shivered, not out of fear, but out of the cold. Fierce determination shone through her eyes as something the cowardly miners could only envy.

”Don’t you dare to destroy my inn, you bastard!” the woman cried and shot another arrow. It found its way into the dragon’s neck. Blood burst from the wound as the beast roared in pain. ”Go back to where you came from!”

The miners who hid in the wheat crops peeked at her, and Natsu could feel their shame from afar. He held his breath as the dragon screeched and sprinted downhill as if it completely forgot his existence. The innkeeper stood her ground against an approaching dragon, drawing and releasing another arrow. Natsu turned to look at Lucy, who followed the innkeeper’s example and readied her own bow. Her eyes calmed down as she focused, aimed and released the string. The dragon shrieked again as Lucy’s arrow flew straight through its open rib bones, hitting somewhere in its insides. Against his hope, the dragon didn’t slow down. Not at all.

Natsu’s stomach sunk as it reached the innkeeper, caught her between its jaws and tossed her body away. She screamed as she landed in the field. Two men ran to her, possibly her husband and son. When the miners picked up their pickaxes and charged into a battle, Natsu rushed back to Lucy and Erza. It wasn’t safe to get separated anymore, he knew. Rogue attacks would be as good as suicide.

”Fire doesn’t work against it”, Natsu said quietly. Lucy shot another arrow as the dragon worked to dodge the swings of the axes. ”Fuck, that beast breathes fire, what was I even thinking when I thought it would work.”

”Iron arrows don’t do much either, it’s scales are too thick”, she answered with a sigh. Lucy gathered her bow in her left hand, but the look in her eyes showed she hadn’t given up yet.

She created a portal to Oblivion with her free hand, purple light dancing on her palm as she summoned her familiar. Natsu realised the same thing as her. If flames or arrows did no damage, maybe another beast would. Natsu summoned his own wolf and commanded the ghostly creature to follow Lucy’s. Together they trotted down the hill and sunk their fangs in the dragon’s tail, only to be swept away in an instant. Natsu grit his teeth as he watched how the wolves faded back to Oblivion, whining as they died again.

Though he had sworn he wouldn’t feel despair, now the hopelessness of their situation began to dawn at him.

Natsu grabbed the warrior’s shoulder and shook her. ”Erza, we need you and your sword. Get up now!”

With blank, lifeless eyes she stared at the dragon and flinched every time she heard a miner’s scream. ”No”, Erza whispered, staying perfectly still. She squeezed her legs against her chest, curling up like a terrified child.

”Oh c’mon. We’ll all die if -”

Erza shook her head. ”We’ll all die if we don’t escape now.”

”We can’t let it -”

”How can you not see?” she turned her eyes to Natsu, and the mage flinched as she raised her voice. ”Just look at it. It thinks of us as low as if we’re nothing but ants. It knows we can’t do anything! We’re nothing but insects in the eyes of a dragon!”

Natsu averted her gaze and watched how the miners fought against the dragon. The pickaxes bounced back from its scales. Nothing seemed to work. The dragon swung its tail and ripped men open with its talons as if it did it for its own entertainment. It didn’t even eat them. Natsu had seen it back in Helgen – the dragons didn’t prey on humans to feed, but to wipe them off existence and claim the world as theirs once again.

And yet he still stubbornly tried to deny that.

”If the dragons were killed in the past, they can be killed again”, he said and tried to get her to stand up. Her sword was sharper than the pickaxes, maybe it could work. ”Damn you’re heavy! Lucy, help me.”

Erza yanked her arms closer to her body before Lucy even toucher her. Natsu let his grip go. If Erza really wanted to sit there doing nothing, he couldn’t help it. Lucy secured the bow in her back again and hung her head in defeat.

”The ancient Nords knew their tongue, they could use the same power as them. We don’t!” Erza cried as tears ran down her cheeks. ”And even if we could kill them, the black dragon would resurrect them again, and again, and again! It’s the end times. The end times have come, and what can we do about it? Nothing!”

”Then we just kill them again, and again, and again. I don’t know about you Companions, but I won’t surrender so easily.”

”Natsu -”

The mage formed a fireball, the stronger version of a regular firebolt and tossed it at the dragon. Black smoke surrounded the beast and maybe blinded it for a moment, but soon it continued the slaughter as nothing had happened. Lucy pulled Natsu’s sleeve and forced him into an eye-contact. The determination in her gaze was gone.

”Natsu, please”, she pleaded. ”Just… don’t.”

The mage blinked. ”Lucy?”

”If… If we escape now… we’ll make it to Winterhold… right?”

Tears glimmered in her eyes as her words began to shiver. Natsu fell speechless and let his gaze drop to the ground. Maybe she was right. Everyone who stayed in Helgen had died. Everyone who would stay there now would die.

Natsu’s heart skipped a beat as a blast of wild wind hit his face. He raised his head and forgot to breathe. Wings spread wide over the treetops as the dragon rose up, its life restored enough to let it fly for the first time in centuries. It let out a delighted roar which echoed all across the mountains, the song of the dragons no longer silenced.

Suddenly, Natsu’s legs refused to move. His gaze followed the dragon as it flew over them and stopped to hover above its empty grave like an ironic icon. Could Erza be right? With the black dragon rising the others from the dead and no-one knowing how to kill them, was the world really going to be overrun by them? Would they really fill the skies and reign in fiery chaos? Those who believed the dragons were only a legend would die in terror, and those who’d survive would be enslaved by them, their pride removed and humanity reduced to the level of an ant.

And that’s how small he felt when the dragon locked eyes with them again. As small as an ant. As if smirking in pleasure, the dragon opened its mouth and Natsu knew what would happen next. With nowhere left to run, nowhere left to hide, he stepped in front of Lucy to cover her before the dragon shouted.

” _ **FUS... RO DAH!”**_

The shout summoned a powerful force from the dragon’s throat, its raw strength pushing aside anything and anyone standing in its wake. And just as if he’d ran into a stone wall, the unrelenting force dashed against his body and threw all three of them down the hill.

Like lifeless dolls.

* * *

Air burst out from Lucy’s lungs as she slammed to the ground, not knowing how far she had ended up. Her head spun as she struggled to catch her breath, her life flashing before her eyes. She had landed on her back, and when she couldn’t find her toes, she feared the worst. But then her legs moved as she rolled around, her fingers clawing the dry grass underneath her. None of her bones felt broken, but her every muscle throbbed in pain. Staggered, she pulled herself back up and looked around, trying to find a hint of Natsu or Erza.

A glimpse of scarlet stood up from the wheat crops as Erza rose. Her forehead bled, but otherwise, she looked uninjured. Lucy flinched as a mighty roar filled the skies like thunder when the dragon soared above them, flying in circles as if it was looking for them. Panic began to spread in her chest when she couldn’t find Natsu anywhere. He had been there just a minute ago, but now he was nowhere in sight. The surviving miners ran around, some dragged their unconscious or dead loved ones into someplace safe like they’d wake up once the dragon would have gone away.

Except that there wasn’t safe anywhere in this land, not anymore.

Lucy’s heart sunk as her eyes found the innkeeper lying in a pool of blood, her son and husband beside her, their bodies ripped apart. She raised her shivering hands on her mouth, the sickness in her stomach forcing her to look away from the grisly scene. Fiercely shaking her head, she tried to command her legs to run, run as fast as they could and as far as they could carry, but they wouldn’t move an inch. She stood there frozen, staring at the abandoned pickaxes and the malachite ores next to the smelter waiting to be turned into ingots. They’d have to wait forever.

Lucy’s eyes ripped open when the cinders by the smelter moved, the charcoal pile forming into the shape of a human. It turned around, a strand of something pink contrasting against the blackness. Lucy realized it wasn't a charcoal pile.

”Natsu!”

Lucy ran across the yard and collapsed on her knees by his side. He didn’t answer, but his eyes found hers, the greens lit in pain. Slowly, his right hand moved to hold the left, blood soaking through his fingers. Lucy’s guts twisted in terror.

”S-shit...” the mage groaned and pulled up his sleeve, making Lucy gasp. A deep, jagged wound ran from his wrist to his elbow, crimson liquid pulsing out in the rhythm of his frantic heartbeat. ”Oh well, it’s… It’s nothing...”

He had a small cut on his cheek, too, and maybe several others all around his body. Many iron instruments laid on the ground beneath him, some of which Lucy had seen used in smelting ores. Of all the places on fucking earth he had landed on a set of blacksmith’s tools. Lucy had known his luck would run out sometime, but why did it have to run out like that?

Not knowing what to do, Lucy’s hands waved rapidly before falling to her lap. ”No, that’s… that’s bad!”

Natsu bent forward to sit, but the pain made him fold in two. Blood stained his white scarf and no matter how hard he squeezed the wound, the bleeding didn’t cease. Red drops fell on the dry grass, and the moment he lifted his hand a bit, blood sprayed from the wound in thin strings.

”I’m… I’ll be fine, I’ll be fine… fuck...”

”You can close that with magic, can’t you?” Lucy asked, speaking so fast it almost couldn’t be understood. Natsu stared at his wound as if he struggled to realise it was his own arm. From the way his face lost all colour, Lucy knew he wouldn’t be fine. It was the shock telling him he would.

”I could, but… I wouldn’t have any magicka left if I did.”

”It’s better than not having any blood left.”

”But -”

”Heal that!”

”Fine, fine, just, okay...” Natsu mumbled as he reluctantly followed Lucy’s order. A light appeared on his left, bloody palm. It shone brightly in the dark and danced on his wound, the bleeding stopping as the edges of skin moved closer to each other. Lucy couldn’t help but feel amazed by what magic would do. If Nords didn’t despise magic so much, restoration mages could heal the sick and wounded far better than any other healers. The light faded as his magicka ran out, his arm not fully healed, but at least it no longer bled.

”Will you be okay now?” Lucy asked with a meek voice. The dragon soared somewhere in the skies, and Lucy wasn’t sure if it was gone or not. She had a feeling it wasn’t done with them yet.

Natsu moved his arm around and winced in pain. Grimacing, he gazed at the closed wound and lowered his sleeve. His face was still pale and his breathing short – it would take a while for the shock to wear off completely.

”It’s my better hand, but whatever, if it still moves it’s all good”, Natsu answered and looked up at her. ”But Lucy, your bow is broken.”

She blinked her eyes. ”It is?”

”You didn’t notice?”

Lucy reached for the bow secured in her back. The weapon dangled from the leather straps, the string keeping the cracked pieces together. How had she not noticed it yet? Lucy took it off, the quiver too, only to find out the arrows had faced the same fate. She tossed them to the ground as the dragon flew above them again, her heart growing cold as she realised there was no way they could see another day.

”Well, fuck it all, then”, Lucy muttered silently. Her fingers curled into fists as she stared at her broken bow.

”What?”

”I said fuck it all.”

Without reacting to her swearing, Natsu cranked himself on his feet as the dragon stopped to hover above the inn. He reached for his belt and pulled the bent, dull orcish dagger from its sheath. The dragon landed on the wheat field, screeching the mockery for the human race. It stepped closer to the warrior hiding in the crops, snarling at its next victim.

”You go grab Erza and run. You run and don’t stop until you reach Windhelm, got it?” Natsu said, glancing at Lucy.

”What are you talking about?”

”When you’re in the College tell them that Natsu of Dragonbridge sends his regards.”

”Wait, what -”

Before she could grab his sleeve he was off running to the dragon. The beast faced towards Erza and didn’t see how the mage appeared from behind. Natsu put the dagger’s handle between his teeth as he jumped and grabbed on the spikes growing on the dragon’s lower back. Its tail swung vigorously as it realised what the mage was doing, but neither its tail nor its wings could hit him as he mounted the dragon. Natsu ran along its spine until it reached its neck. He seized the dragon from the horn and shoved the dagger into its flesh with all of his strength, the beast roaring in pain.

Natsu looked so incredibly small in the back of a dragon.

”Why are you still standing there!? Run while I keep this thing busy!” the mage shouted as he struck the dagger through the dragon’s shoulder, the blade piercing through the weaker skin. It flapped its wings, continuously trying to throw the mage off his balance, but Natsu’s grip on its horn persisted. Lucy shook her head with her limbs frozen. All she could do was watch, knowing that such insane bravery would be his undoing this time.

”What are you waiting for? A miracle? There won’t be any! Get off already, goddamnit!”

”I just can’t leave you here to die!” Lucy cried.

”And I won’t watch anyone else dying in front of my fucking eyes!”

Tears fell on her cheeks as she followed his desperate attempt. The dragon’s vital parts were protected in scales harder than the orcish steel, and so deep that a small dagger would not reach them. Natsu stabbed its neck and brownish blood burst from the wound as he pulled the dagger back. _’_ _I’ll see you using that spell, I promise’,_ he had said, but everything he did would lead into breaking that promise.

She wouldn’t let him die in front of her eyes either.

_It’s just a bow stored in Oblivion..._

Lucy closed the battle out as she concentrated deep. She hadn’t even tried to summon that weapon before, but she imagined its might, heard its call as it stood in the shelf of another realm, waiting for her to pick it up. Purple light began to form around her palms, the magicka in her already running dry. But if she couldn’t afford to cast it with today’s magic, she’d just steal some from tomorrow’s.

’ _If you’ll die today, I’ll let you see me casting that spell now.’_

And so she forced the Bound Bow to cross the liminal bridge to be seated in her arms, ready to be drawn. If the manmade weapons wouldn’t hurt a dragon, maybe those made by the Daedra would.

Lucy’s head spun as the purple light took the shape of a bow, as light as a feather. It had recurved shape and a demonic design with spikes protruding from various parts of its body. A quiver full of arrows accompanied it. Even though she was on the edge of passing out from exhaustion, she notched an arrow, kept her stance and drew – it was a hundred times lighter to draw than a regular bow. She released the arrow, sharper and stronger than any other kind. It flew through the air and struck straight through the dragon’s wing. The beast jerked and turned towards her, still trying to shake the mage off its back.

As quickly as she could, she drew another arrow and released. It found the dragon’s chest and sunk deep into its flesh, flames pouring from the hole. And suddenly the beasts great dark eyes lit with fear. Natsu kept stabbing the dragon with the blade which had bent in half, too busy to notice her.

With her final strength, Lucy drew the last arrow. She let go, feeling as the world around her came to a slow. The arrow hit the dragon’s head and tore its way through its skull. Its head swung far back and a dying, fearful scream escaped its throat as it life faded away. The beast collapsed to the ground and spread its wings for one last attempt to soar through the skies as the mightiest creature in all of existence, only to be brought down by a mere, pathetic human.

Natsu jumped down from the dragon’s back and stared at Lucy and her magical bow, his expression in full awe. He threw his useless dagger at his feet, his limbs falling lifelessly to his sides. The bow disappeared from her hands. Feeling too weary and worn, she couldn’t fully understand what had just happened. Was the dragon really dead? How could _she_ have killed a _dragon?_

Lucy stepped back as the dragon’s scales set ablaze. Its skin and flesh began to dissolve towards the darkened sky, but something else was happening, too. A shining mist fumed from its remains and danced in the air until all out of sudden, Lucy’s body absorbed the mist. It surrounded her into a mystic embrace and seeped through her skin, burning as it entered her bloodstream.

”Lucy?” she heard Natsu’s voice. ”What’s happening to you!?”

She’d answer if she knew.

Her heart drummed in a rapid rhythm as visions from the ancient times flashed before her eyes. As if she could see the world as only a dragon could – then she realised the mist had been the dragon’s soul which merged into her own, its life and knowledge now becoming a part of hers. Lucy fell on her knees as the air got stuck in her throat. Natsu and Erza ran to her, but Lucy couldn’t say a single word to them. She saw them speaking, but didn’t hear their words.

And then the mountains rumbled as the Greybeards called for the Last Dragonborn, appeared on the world in the time of great need, by the command of the gods.

” _ **DO – VAH – KIIN!”**_

* * *

  


**First of all, sorry it took so long. It was a lot harder to write than I first thought. As English is not my mother tongue, writing battle scenes is hard, but I hope it came out good enough.**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter and the biggest reveal so far! How do you feel about Lucy being the Last Dragonborn? Did you guess it or think it would be Natsu? And what did you think of seeing Natsu's point of view from the events of Helgen? Anyway, this is where the story really starts!**

**I'm beyond thankful for all the feedback I've gotten <3 Thank you all!!!**


	15. THE PALACE OF KINGS

When the dragon soared over them again, darkness swept over Erza’s world.

Everything in her life eclipsed as all would fade into the black womb of death. The end had come so fast, too fast for her to grasp. She just wanted Jellal could be there and hold her as they’d die. She lost the touch of herself, her mind grumbled into nothingness as utter, complete fear took over her – but then a sudden light pierced through the dark.

She stood in the wheat field, unable to believe how she could even stand. Her legs felt numb as if she didn’t have them at all anymore. The dragon landed in front of her, and she felt the earth quaking underneath her, even smelled the blood and smoke in the beast’s breath. It locked eyes with her, but she couldn’t see. She couldn’t see anything at all. Her mind threw her back into Rorikstead’s crops she had harvested with him, for a Nords last thoughts should be of home.

Jellal’s face faded as the dragon turned away and flapped its wings like a trapped bird. Erza’s vision sharpened again, a small pink spot appearing in the middle of the mist. The dragon roared as _something_ struck _something_ into its neck – and Erza understood it was Natsu with his dagger, mounted in the dragon’s back. Erza blinked in awe. Blood sprayed from the dragon’s wounded shoulder, crimson droplets landing on Natsu’s face. He shouted something about running away, but why was he still there? Why didn’t he run?

Suddenly Erza realised running wasn’t his intention at all.

A bright blue wisp flew through the air and hit the dragon’s wing. The beast jerked from its strength. Erza turned her gaze to the direction where it had come from and flinched. Lucy stood there with a gleaming bow in her hands, drew another arrow and loosened. The arrow hit the dragon’s chest and flames burst from the wound, a hollow screech escaping its lungs. Erza could not believe her eyes. What were these suicidal mages doing, setting up a fight against a dragon? Why were they even fighting in the first place?

Why wasn’t _she_ fighting with them?

Erza tried to reach for her sword, but her arms didn’t move. Her fingers were frozen, those which had grabbed the hilt a thousand times in the past without a single hint of fear. She, the bravest warrior amongst the Companions, now petrified in terror. A deep shame washed over her – she had left them to their fate. She hadn’t even tried to fight by their side, and even death wouldn't wash away that stain. How could she ever step into Sovngarde now? The doors of the Hall of Valor would never open to cravens.

And then Lucy’s arrow pierced through the dragon’s skull. The arrogant, magnificent creature screamed cowardly as it collapsed to the ground. Air stuck in Erza’s throat as she watched how Natsu jumped from the dragon’s back, running to the side as scales begun to evaporate into the sky. Had the mages really defeated the dragon? The beast’s lifeforce escaped, its soul taking a form of white mist.

But the soul didn’t dissolve into the wind. It changed direction and flowed straight into Lucy. Erza’s eyes widened as the girl fell on her knees, enveloped in the dragon’s soul as it seeped into her body. Natsu ran to her and upon her instinct, Erza followed him, the fear in her legs melting away.

”Are you alright?” the mage shouted to Lucy. ”What was that?”

Lucy didn’t answer. Natsu grabbed her shoulders and shook her, but it did not help. Crimson marks stained Natsu’s white scarf and his pale fingers, making Erza notice the cut adorning his arm. Had he really fought the dragon wounded like that? Lucy gasped for breath, beyond shocked by what was happening to her. But Erza knew in her bones what it was. Even though the dragons were invincible creatures, there was one they feared. In their tongue, it meant;

” _ **DO – VAH – KIIN!”**_

_Dragonborn._

The monks of the Throat of the World sensed what happened, and so the whole world quaked as they announced the Dragonborn’s newfound existence. As if the mightiest rumbling of thunder, their whisper carried all over Tamriel. Erza could not believe she was right there, witnessing the miracle who would save them all. Natsu, startled from the noise, turned his head to the skies in awe – he knew not of the lore of the ancient Nords, unlike Erza. She had heard stories of the End Times since she had been a child, those legends and prophecies forever imprinted into her mind.

_Upon the return of the dragons, the Last Dragonborn would appear as well._

”What… what’s going on? I don’t… I don’t understand…” Lucy mumbled against her palms, her voice weaker than a whisper. ”What did I do? What... What’s all of this?”

”You killed the dragon!” Natsu exclaimed with sparkling, wide eyes. ”And that was so fucking cool!”

Erza stared at the two, still unable to say a single word through her astonishment. She had never been silenced by hope, but in that moment she understood it was the greatest power of all. Hope, the dawn which broke after the darkest hour of the night.

”I can’t believe it”, the warrior said then, both Natsu’s and Lucy’s gazes turning towards her. ”You’re Dragonborn, Lucy.”

The girl blinked, shaking her head. ”What?”

”In the very oldest tales, the Dragonborn would slay dragons and steal their power, and that’s what you did, isn’t it? Absorbed a dragon’s power?”

Lucy’s face lost all colour as disbelief flooded over her. ”I don’t know what happened to me! And what was that… noise?”

”The Greybeards”, Erza answered. ”They summoned you to the High Hrothgar, like the old Tiber Septim himself.”

Erza reached out to catch her when Lucy’s eyes slipped closed and she collapsed to the ground. She held her like she was the most precious and fragile thing in the whole world. Natsu stood by their side, losing the sparkles in his gaze as he understood what had truly happened. He turned to look at the dragon’s skeleton, its life now withered away. They had really killed it. Just a moment ago it had wreaked havoc, but now it was gone, taken down by mere humans.

Calmness fell upon the battleground, like a morning mist shrouding the wheat fields. The fires died down, but the storm clouds parted, letting moonlight enlighten the world.

Erza followed the mage with her eyes as he left. Natsu picked up the orcish blade he had tossed away. It was unrecognisably misshaped, and Erza doubted even Eorlund Gray-Mane couldn’t fix the weapon now. Natsu held it in his bloody hands for a while, then he walked to investigate the dragon’s remains. He shivered from head to toes, and his skin was as pale as clam meat. Erza wanted to command him to rest, but felt like she had no right.

”What are you doing?” Erza asked. The dragon’s jaws were left open, so wide the mage could stand straight in its bony mouth.

”Taking a memento”, the mage answered. He used the twisted blade to remove one of the dragon’s smallest teeth. He struck the dagger to the root of the bone to loosen it, but it held on tighter than he had excepted. Cursing, he used every bit of force had left to extract the tooth, and finally it came out. It was only the size of his finger, while the fangs as large as his whole arm. Why’d he done that? To have it as a keepsake or fetch a good price?

The trail of her thoughts became interrupted by the approaching sound of galloping horses.

Natsu shoved the dragon’s tooth into his pocket when a group of Windhelm guards and Stormcloak soldiers arrived behind the inn. There were two dozen men, half of them on horseback, all clad in blue cuirasses. A boy at Natsu’s age followed them and broke into tears as he saw the destruction the dragon had left behind. He ran to one of the charred corpses and smashed his fists to the ground. Erza forced her heart to harden – she wouldn’t show any weakness in front of Jarl’s men.

Erza lowered her eyes to Lucy, and suddenly she felt angry; angry for the soldiers who had taken so long to come. They were too late, forcing an innocent girl to risk her life to protect Kynesgrove on her own. Everyone knew a dragon’s grave was there, and the Jarl should’ve sent troops there _before_ all of this happened.

One of the soldiers, probably their captain, rode his white horse closer to them and stopped. ”You there!” the man shouted and took off his helmet, revealing his black hair. ”What happened? Is the dragon really dead? Did one of you kill it? Was it you, Companion?”

Erza shook her head as deep shame struck through her heart, again. She couldn’t blame the soldiers. She hadn’t done anything either.

”It wasn’t me, it was her”, the warrior answered and looked at Lucy.

”Can’t be. She’s just a little girl, how could she do it?”

”She did”, Natsu told sharply. ”And she’s the Dragonborn.”

Another soldier rode to the commander’s side, whispering something to him. The commander nodded. ”Skulvar, you check this place with half of our men. Count the dead and gather the survivors, and then report back to Ulfric”, he said before turning towards Erza. ”We’ll take you to the Jarl right now. He’s got to decide if that’s true or not”

The mage took a step back. ”To the Jarl?”

”Jorleif! Vlad! Lokir! Seize them!”

Erza watched in shock as the guards grabbed the mage and tied his wrists together. He did not resist, but the look on his face told he did not approve it either. It would be futile to fight, for they were no match for the Jarl’s men in their current condition. Another man came to bind Erza’s hands, even Lucy’s, even though she was unconscious. They confiscated Erza’s sword and the mage’s dagger with no explanations, then they tossed Lucy on horse’s back, leaving her head hanging down.

’ _Is this how the Stormcloaks treat the hero of Skyrim?’_ Erza wondered as they set forth.

* * *

Every step felt like walking on shards of glass as he followed the guards to Windhelm. His head pounded in a frantic rhythm, the exhaustion and the bloodloss taking their toll on him. The dark road seemed to go on forever, and he envied Lucy who got to ride on horseback. Except that she just laid there almost lifelessly, quiet sobs every now and then showing she still lived.

When city lights began to flutter in the distance, an enormous wave of relief flooded over him. Whatever the Jarl would decide, it would surely be better than this. Having his hands tied reminded him of being the Legion’s captive. At least this time his hands were bound in front of him, which he didn’t really understand. The Imperials back then had used special enchanted rope which prevented him from using any magic, but the Stormcloaks seemed to lack that kind of warfare. He could burn the binds into ashes anytime he wanted… except that he was completely out of magicka.

They passed the stables and stepped on the bridge which crossed the White River. Soldiers patrolled on the walls, and Natsu felt their gazes on his back as they walked to the gates. He had been in Windhelm many times before, but he had never felt as unwelcomed as now. The soldiers probably thought of them as Imperial spies and the dragon attack as a Thalmor trap or something. Igneel had some Dark Elf friends in the Grey Quarters, so maybe the guards remembered him from causing troubles there? Whatever it was, coldness spread in Natsu’s chest as the guards opened the city gates.

Lucy lifted her head a bit, but then she fell down again. Erza walked somewhere behind the horses, her hands tied all the same. Citizens of Windhelm were sleeping in their homes, but the streets weren’t empty. The homeless had gathered around the brazier in front of the Candlehearth Hall, unfriendlily staring at Natsu. They weren’t welcomed in the Inn for they had no coin to pay their stay with. If Natsu remembered right, he had seen some of their faces before right there, in front of the same fire, many years ago. Some lives never moved forward.

”Move along, mage”, the dark-haired soldier said and poked Natsu’s back with the tip of his sword. ”The Jarl is waiting.”

”At least not the headsman...”

The soldier stared at him, a deep frown forming on his forehead. ”What did you say?”

”Nothing.”

”Just because you might have killed you a dragon it doesn’t mean we’ll treat you like a hero. Until there’s actual proof about it, we won’t believe it.”

”The dragon was dead”, Natsu grunted. ”What else do you need?”

”It’s up to the Jarl to decide, not to us. He’ll decide if you can be trusted. I don’t know about that Dragonborn business, but something surely made the Greybeards go wild. But Ulfric made one mistake before, and he won’t do that again.”

Natsu understood why Ulfric wanted to be cautious. He had been captured by the Legion in his own land, and it wasn’t like the Imperials wouldn’t try to kill him again. As their first attempt failed, who’d know what they’d try next? Faking a dragon attack to send assassins to murder him? When it was put that way, it almost made sense.

”Do we look like the Thalmor to you? Or Legionnaires, huh? We’re just mages from the College of Winterhold, that’s all.”

”You think that’ll make the Jarl trust you? Think again, idiot.”

Natsu wanted to say about Erza being a Companion but kept his mouth shut. The city street went straight to the other end of the town, the route seeming so much shorter at night. Guards lifted the portcullis, opening the entrance to the courtyard of the Palace of the Kings. It was as far as the horses could go. One of the soldiers picked Lucy from horseback and roughly tossed her to his shoulder. Natsu bit his cheek as he held back the urge to punch that soldier. Lucy didn’t show signs of waking up soon, but he hoped the soldiers would be more careful with her.

She was their only hope, after all, even if they couldn’t prove it yet.

The doors of the palace were large enough for a giant to pass through. It was the oldest building of Windhelm, maybe all of Skyrim, built by old Ysgamor himself. Soldiers pushed the doors open and urged them to move forward, and the warmth surging into Natsu’s aching bones almost made him welcomed as he stepped into the great hall.

The hall ran the whole length of the palace. Blue Stormcloack banners hang on the walls and a large table stood in the middle, the leftovers from dinner still uncleaned. Natsu’s gaze moved to the far end of the hall, to Jarl Ulfric sitting on his stone-carved throne. How had he survived Helgen, Natsu didn’t know, and it didn’t even matter now. Another poke of a sword forced him to move forward.

When they had crossed the hall, the soldier carrying Lucy dropped her to the ground. Natsu flinched, but when Lucy turned around and fluttered her eyes, he was relieved to know she was okay. Relatively, at least. Ulfric Stormcloack stared at them in silence for a good while until he clapped his hands, dismissing the extras out of the room. Only three of the most high-ranked soldiers were allowed to stay.

”So, who are you, and where are you from?” Ulfric said when the soldiers had left.. His long, light-brown hair was combed to the back, and the dust on his face had been washed away. He looked completely different compared to how he had been in Helgen, his pride now restored.

All three of them looked at each other in means of deciding who would speak. Natsu took up the role.

”Natsu of Dragonbridge”, he started. ”From the College of Winterhold.”

”Erza of Rorikstead”, the warrior followed. ”I fight for the Companions.”

Lucy was the last to speak, her voice as quiet as a whisper. ”I’m… Lucy… H-Heartfilia. I was… from Helgen.”

Ulfric’s face stayed still as calm water, as none of the names said anything to him.

”And what happened in Kynesgrove?”

”We were going to investigate the dragon burial mound there, but then a dragon appeared”, Natsu said. ”The same which destroyed Helgen. It raised another dragon from the dead and left.”

”And then you killed the dragon which was raised?”

”Yes. Lucy killed it.”

”Her? That little girl?” Ulfric scoffed. ”She can’t even stand up.”

Natsu grinned, the anger in him beginning to boil over. ”Maybe that’s because she used up more magicka than she even has, you buffed-up ignorant -”

”Watch your tongue! You’re speaking to Ulfric Stormcloak, the true High King!” the commander shouted, and Natsu felt the sword against his back again. Damn, he would punch that bastard if he’d poke another hole through his robes.

Gladly, the Jarl wasn’t affected by the mage’s outburst. ”Let’s keep this brief and clean. I need to know if you can be trusted, that’s all. So, girl, you really killed the dragon and stole its soul?” Ulfric said to Lucy.

Lucy lifted her chin from the floor so she’d look the Jarl into the eyes. ”Yes, that’s… That’s what happened.”

”There is only one way to prove that. Try to Shout. Only the Dragonborn can Shout without years of training.”

Natsu sensed how Lucy tensed in anxiety. Pressuring gazes were all on her, crushing her with anticipation. It had been said that Ulfric had Shouted King Torygg to death, thus betraying the Greybeards who had thought him the Way of the Voice, or the Thu’um, or the language of the dragons, Natsu was too confused to even think about it. He just knew that the Voice was supposed to be used for the worship and glory of the gods rather than martial exploits.

”I… I don’t know how!”

The Jarl only raised his brows and sighed. ”Then I’m afraid you aren’t worth my time.”

Guards behind them got restless. Would they be sent to the dungeons next? Natsu wouldn’t allow that to happen. None of them deserved to go to jail for what they’d done. They saved a fucking village. He glanced at Lucy, gaining her eye-contact. ”Hey, Lucy, remember anything that read on that wall? Or what the dragon said? Try that”, he whispered, unsure if it would work, but she had to try.

Lucy nodded and withdrew to her memories. Ulfric watched idly as she concentrated, not even trying to hide his mocking disbelief.

And then Lucy uttered a single word, the magic of the dragons echoing in her voice.

” _ **Fus.”**_

The power of her whisper almost threw Natsu off his feet. He barely managed to keep his balance as the force hit his body, a force similar to a dragon’s. It reached the Jarl, staggering the doubt and mockery out of him. Even if it had been quiet, her word had the power of a dragon, pushing aside anything on its path.

Natsu’s eyes widened in pure excitement, but Lucy raised her hands to cover her mouth. Everyone in the hall stared right at her, as if the situation wasn’t hard enough for her already.

”By Ysmir, it’s true”, Ulfric exclaimed in utter surprise. ”You _are_ Dragonborn.”

Lucy fell on her hands and knees, curling into a fetal position. As the guard no longer held him back, Natsu hopped to closer and crouched by her side. Lucy’s eyes closed again as she passed out. Her body and mind had reached their utmost limits.

”See?” Erza asked. ”We’re not your enemies.”

Ulfric furrowed his brow as he studied her with his eyes. He could surely trust a Companion, but could he trust a mage? ”You definitely aren’t”, the Jarl said and turned towards Natsu. ”But are you my allies either?”

”It depends”, Natsu answered. He stood up and extended his arms. ”But there’s no negotiating while our hands are tied. Free us, and then we can talk.”

Jarl nodded, and the commander cut the ropes around their wrists. He started with Natsu’s, then the warrior’s, and lastly, he turned Lucy over to release hers. Lucy’s arms fell to her sides, powerless and limp. Concern built up in Natsu’s guts. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about her state.

”You, mage, you were the Legion’s captive”, the Jarl started to catch Natsu’s attention. ”If I pardon your crimes by my right as a Jarl and the true High King of Skyrim, will you be of my service?”

Natsu silenced. Was this the moment he had waited for? To take up arms and fight for the honour of his fallen brother? Suddenly, he felt nothing but reluctant resistance. ”Of your service as a soldier?”

The Jarl’s response was stern. ”A soldier you’ll never be. It would be waste to put you in the battlefront. What I want is for you to escort the Dragonborn to the High Hrothgar. It’s a dangerous pilgrimage she can’t do on her own. Escort her to the Greybeards, then you’ll be a free man to do whatever you want. That’s what I ask from you.”

As the words sunk in, Natsu realised he had been _hopin_ g for something like that. When he had made up his mind about becoming a soldier, he couldn’t have even imagined Lucy would be the Dragonborn. She had been just a girl who wanted to be a mage, that was all. He’d take her to the College and then move on, no strings attached, but everything changed when she killed a dragon.

That’s why he’d seen her as a swan amongst the chicken.

She was a dragon amongst the mortals.

”Okay”, Natsu answered straight up. ”I’ll do it.”

Ulfric moved on and looked at Erza. ”And you, Companion, what would you want as a reward?”

”Nothing”, she said, keeping her eyes locked with the Jarl’s. ”I was a coward and didn’t do anything in the battle against that dragon. These mages are the only ones to thank, so all I ask is for you to treat them well. They’re heroes today, and they need all the rest they can get.”

There was a certain kind of bravery in admitting one’s weakness, and Natsu admired her for that. He heard quiet mumbling among the Jarl’s men. None of them would have thought of mages as heroes. No-one ever did anyway, until now.

”All of you can stay in the Palace of the Kings tonight”, Ulfric told, silencing the muttering. ”There are vacant beds in the sleeping quarters upstairs, with food and drink as much as you need. I’ll think of a suitable reward for the Dragonborn and announce it tomorrow. Until then, suit yourselves.”

”What about our stuff?” Natsu asked. ”They’re still in the Braidwood Inn.”

”Your belongings will be collected from Kynesgrove and returned to you tomorrow.”

”We have their weapons”, the Commander said, and the Jarl agreed with a nod. The man took Erza’s sword from his bag and gave it to her. Then he pulled up Natsu’s dagger, and laughter roared in the great hall as he tossed it back to the mage.

”You fought the dragon with _that_?” Jarl Ulfric laughed.

Natsu grinned. ”Well, I used to have a glass dagger, but the Imperials took it.”

”We retrieved some of the things the Legion stole from us when they captured us. I’ll have my men looking for a glass dagger, in case we picked up yours.”

Natsu thanked with a nod as he secured the bent dagger on his belt. He’d like to have it as a keepsake. Once he’d grown grey and old, he’d want to hold it again and relive the moment he struck it into a dragon’s neck.

”Erik, will you show our heroes to their room?” Ulfric asked from the commander. He agreed and commenced to pick Lucy up, but Natsu stepped in his way. He wouldn’t let anyone else handle her poorly. The promise he had given to her had a whole new meaning now.

 _'I'm going to keep you safe',_ Natsu thought as he picked Lucy up. _'_ _I'm going to keep you safe until I leave this world.'_

And then Natsu knew Igneel would’ve wanted that. Maybe the damn elf had known it all along, seen it in a dream or something – and it made Natsu feel so small. Igneel had known Natsu’s path wouldn’t end in Helgen. His death had changed the course of fate, and instead of avenging him, Natsu decided to make sure Igneel’s sacrifice would be worthy.

’ _I’ve got this, brother.’_

* * *

Lucy didn’t understand what was happening. It felt like she was walking up the stairs, except that her legs didn’t move. Her head leaned against something soft which smelled of smoke and blood. She tried to open her eyes, but all she could see was black. People spoke in the background, and slowly the words came unblurred as her consciousness started to return.

” _Hey, Erza”_ , she heard the mage say. His voice sounded louder than the others, but it still had a strange echo. _”Lucy’s in bad shape. Could you go ask the court wizard for some potions for magicka regeneration?”_

” _Sure. Do you need anything? That wound looks painful.”_

” _It’s all good. I’ll just wash and bind it and it will be fine. But Lucy got herself a pretty good magicka deficiency. Its usually not this bad, but she just… Damn, I think she used a week’s worth of magicka at one shot.”_

Lucy couldn’t say anything. Was that the reason she felt so horrible? She had only had hangover once in her life after drinking with Haming, but it didn’t even come close to how she felt now. As if her whole life had drained from her body, leaving an empty vessel behind. Strange, considering she had just absorbed a living dragon’s soul. Maybe her soul was rejecting it? She was too small to hold a soul so colossal.

” _I’ve never even heard of that kind of an illness.”_

” _It’s a mage’s thing, really. It happens to every novice at some point. When one uses more magicka than the soul can regenerate, the person feels more weary and tired. If they keep going, they’ll get more symptoms, like passing out. But Lucy will be okay with rest and some potions, I think. She probably won’t be able to use magic in a while though...”_

Lucy tried to move her hands. Slowly, they inched closer to each other despite the immense pain flaring up in her every cell. Her fingers clutched into the same softness her cheek leaned at. Footsteps faded into the distance and a door creaked as it was opened. The coldness on her skin disappeared as she came into someplace warm and cosy. Flames of a hearth painted to the blackness, and as her vision gradually regained, she saw Natsu’s white scarf touching her face. He had given her a piggyback ride upstairs, and Lucy was too exhausted to mind. She even preferred that over being carried by a soldier.

Natsu noticed she was awake and laid her down to sit on the edge of a bed. Lucy studied the room; it was a small chamber with four beds and two closets. Orange lights and black shadows danced on the walls, and the crackling sound of burning wood filled the silence. Erza weren’t there, and Lucy assumed she was off to fetch the potions.

”Lucy?” the mage called as she kept staring at the wall behind him. ”You know what’s funny? You thought the Last Dragonborn would be me.”

Natsu sat next to her and Lucy bit her bottom lip. There was nothing funny about it at all.

”It… It should have rather been you”, she whispered. Each word left her more strained. ”Gods… This world is doomed. I… I can’t do anything, I’m not strong enough, I’m not -”

”Lucy.”

”What?”

”You conjured a fucking bow you shouldn’t have been able to cast in years. I’ve never seen anyone learn magic as fast as you. Even my brother wasn’t as talented.”

Lucy wanted to shake her head but didn’t. Her head felt as heavy as a barrel full of water. As her arms tired to support her position, she lay down on her side and pressed her face into a feather-filled pillow. She didn’t understand why they were allowed to stay in a Jarl’s place. Why weren’t they thrown outside like the commoners they were? This wasn’t what they had planned. They were supposed to spend the night in an inn. If her legs would carry, she’d walk there and restore the illusion of being just an ordinary girl.

She didn’t want any of this.

”And I can’t… I can’t even stand after casting that spell”, Lucy muttered into the pillow and was surprised when Natsu answered. Her voice had been so quiet it wasn’t supposed to be heard.

”So? It would’ve cost you your life if you were a normal person.”

”But... What if I can’t use magic ever again?”

Cold chills ran across her body as she realised she hoped for that. She hoped she had used up all the magic she would ever have. The legacy of her mothers behind her would’ve been wasted, but maybe it was for the best. Her parents had known better. She should’ve listened to them when they had tried to crush her dreams. They were _protecting_ her from all of this, after all.

”Don’t be silly. Of course you can”, Natsu answered. ”Erza’s going to get you some potions to help you feel better.”

Lucy turned around, her legs brushing against the mage who sat in the other end of the bed. She stared into the ceiling as her chin began to tremble. He didn’t lie. Lucy shielded her eyes with her elbow as tears welled up. She felt Natsu’s gaze on her, and hated herself for crying again, for she knew he hated it when she cried.

”I’m just so… scared”, she whispered, holding back the tears.

”Scared of what?”

Lucy’s voice cracked as she answered. ”Of this fate.”

Natsu fell quiet. Lucy listened to the fire dancing in the hearth. Its melody carried her back to Helgen again, to her home burning to the ground. She had never understood how fragile life was. Like a piece of paper thrown into the flames, all could turn into ashes in a blink of an eye. All a dragon had to do was _exhale_ and a city would be reduced to dust.

She flinched as a horrifying insight cleared in her mind. ”I just realised… The black dragon attacked Helgen because it sensed my power there”, Lucy spoke her thoughts to make them real. ”It destroyed the whole town so the only one who could kill them would be eliminated. Everyone died because I was there. Mother and father, my friends, Haming, the chickens and the dogs and everyone -”

”I didn’t die because you were there.”

His interruption put her thoughts on hold. There was nothing she could do about it now. She couldn’t turn back the time. She had survived, Natsu had survived, that was all there was left. The two of them standing among the ashes of their lives. She moved her arm away from her face, turned towards the hearth and let the tears fall.

”I… I wanna go home. I just want everything to be as it was, I don’t want this stupid adventure anymore, I don’t want to be -”

”You’re the only one who can save us now, Lucy”, Natsu said quietly. ”You’re the only one who can stop the dragons.”

She closed her eyes, as if it would make that truth go away. In the Nord tradition, the Dragonborn represented everything a Nord should strive to be. A great and powerful dragonslayer, a fearless warrior who’d be the end of all Skyrim’s foes. Why in the world was that gift given to _her_?

”But how do I do that?” she asked.

The dragon she had killed – she still struggled to understand she had actually _killed_ it – hadn’t been in full strength. Its lifeforce was maybe a quarter of what it could be. How could she ever kill more of them? And about that black dragon… Lucy didn’t even want to imagine it.

”Well… I don’t know, but I’m sure the Greybeards will know”, Natsu answered, making Lucy wince. She was done hearing about the monks. ”They summoned you there after all. They’ll guide you forward.”

”I don’t want to go there.”

”Why?”

”Because Ulfric commanded you to escort me to High Hrothgar and then you’d be free to go, to live your life as a soldier, or whatever you’d want.”

Suddenly, Lucy regretted saying that. It was the same as saying, _’I can’t do this on my own’_. Would a Dragonborn rely on anyone else’s help? It made her feel more like a coward.

”Is that why you’re so upset?” Natsu asked.

Her silence answered in her stead – even though she couldn’t admit it, he was right.

”I won’t go anywhere if you don’t want me to.”

Lucy’s eyes flitted from the hearth to the mage. Had he truly said that? Did he _mean_ it? Lucy blinked as she stared at him, tears running down her cheeks.

”But you’ve got your friends death to avenge -”

”You know what? I was supposed to be the first of us to go to the block”, the mage started. ”I was supposed to die first. All was going good until Igneel said something stupid and got dragged to the block in front of my fucking eyes. Then he was dead, and I was alive. I don’t want his death to be in vain. He died for a reason. And what would be a better reason than letting me help the Last Dragonborn to fulfil her destiny?”

”But -”

”We’ll be a team, right?”

Lucy blinked. ”A team?”

”Yeah. A dragon-slaying team. Just how cool is that?”

When Lucy smiled through her tears and nodded, she realised she had almost prayed for that. Had it been the Jarl’s command or a decision of his own, Lucy didn’t know. Natsu reached out his blood-stained hand. Whatever made him change his mind, it made her destiny as Dragonborn lighter to carry.

”Okay”, she answered and grasped the mage’s hand, curling her fingers around his. ”Let’s be a team.”

* * *

**A/N: Gates of Windhelm and the Great Hall of the Palace of the Kings**

  


**Merry Christmas and better New Year to everyone!! Thank you for reading, hope you liked this chapter!**


	16. THE GIFT OF CHARITY

_Annals of the Dragonguard.  
  
_ A man traced his thumb over a book’s cover and read the title again and again in the campfire’s dim light. The memory of his ancestors held written in those pages, a truth the world had forgotten long ago, finally in his hand. For a lifetime he had chased the last remnants of his legacy, and this discovery brought him one step closer to finding it. And it had almost cost him his life, only to plunge him deeper into despair. 

The prophecies were coming true, the signs were clear. There was no doubt of it. Not anymore.

He raised his gaze to the night sky. The stars were hidden behind storm clouds as black as the Dragon had been. Even a mere thought of it made shivers run down his spine, and his nerves lit in tearing pain. The final portent of the End of Days, the Dragon from the dawn of time who’d devour the souls of the living and the dead – it had surely been there. As if it had sensed he had found the keys to its defeat, it had been there waiting for him when he returned to Skyrim, ready to tear him into pieces.

It had all happened so quickly. The Dragon ambushed him in the dark, its black scales and horns invisible against the night. Before he even saw it, his body had been ripped apart by talons like sharpened scythes. The Dragon had flown back to the mountains, leaving him to die. But arrogancy was the frailty of the dragonkind – they miscalculated a human’s ability to survive against the most hopeless odds.

He looked down at the book held in his remaining hand. It hadn’t stopped trembling, and probably never would. Was losing the half of himself a worthy sacrifice? The lost blood would be replaced with new, but how to restore a lost hope? All he could do was watch the doom approach, slowly.

He fought against the urge to toss the book into the fire. His ancestors did not fight against the dragons, they protected the ones with the dragon blood. Why did he still hold on to that ancient honour? Only a Dragonborn could stop the Dragon, and there hadn’t been one known in centuries. The age of heroes was gone. He had absolutely no purpose left, so why’d he still keep on the fight?

Maybe the gods had grown tired of the humankind, and left them to their fate, as a plaything for the World-Eater. If the Dragon would win, man would be gone from this world, lost in the shadow of the black wings unfurled.

Right before his fingers loosened the grip on the book he held above the flames, the most powerful thunder rumbled all across the world. The mountains shook and the earth quaked, and as he felt it in his bones he knew it wasn’t thunder.

” _Dovahkiin.”_

He could barely believe his ears. It was the call of the Greybeards, steadfast as winter. Could it be true? Could another Dragonborn have surfaced in this turning of age, during this terrible time? He pulled the book of his ancestors back and pressed it against his chest.

Then there was hope, after all.

The gods hadn’t abandoned them just yet.

* * *

_After the potions had lulled her to sleep, Lucy dreamt of home._

_She stood behind the counter, counting the coins in the cash register, like she did every evening. Lucy raised her eyes from the gold and looked at Mother, the woman putting books into the shelf. Her fair hair was tied in a bun, and her yellow dress brought out the golden brown in her eyes. Everyone said Lucy was an exact copy of her mother, and she understood why. Sometimes it felt like looking in the mirror when she looked at her._

_Mother was absorbed into her work, smiling and humming some unknown song. Lucy had heard it many times, but never knew the words. Only the melody. Mother looked so happy, content as if she didn’t need anything else. Did she ever read those books, dream of living another life?_

_Lucy couldn’t help but wonder how did a caged bird learn to sing._

_Lucy envied her for that, lowering her gaze back to the golden coins. While Mother had chosen a merchant’s life when she married Father, Lucy had no choice. She couldn’t choose anything, not even the person she’d marry one day. Father would choose a suitable man for her, probably some merchant’s lastborn son. She’d have sons of her own who’d inherit the store, fixing the fault in its history of being owned by a woman._

_She cringed at the thought but swallowed her bitterness. She raised her head again, and her heart sunk to the bottom of her body. The books had fallen to the floor, and Mother was gone._

_Startled out of her wits, Lucy left the desk and ran upstairs to check her parent’s sleeping chamber, but Mother wasn’t there. She slammed the door shut, crossed the living hall to the room of her own, but mother wasn’t there either. Her heart raced rapidly in her chest, pain spreading all over her body. Had Mother gone outside? She didn’t remember hearing the front door creaking, or the wind bells chiming._

_Lucy ran back downstairs. She opened the front door and stepped over the threshold, but there was nothing to land her foot on. The porch was gone, the city street too. There was only blank, endless whiteness. She swayed forward, reeling down as she fell into the mist. Mother's song echoed in the distance, ever fading, and she knew she's never learn the words now. Her home disappeared from her sight, and as the gushing air pressured against her body, she realised why Mother never dreamt of an escape._

_The coins in the register were the only safe thing in the world, ever unchanging, always the same cold gold._

Lucy woke up to the feeling of her body thumping to the ground. Her tense limbs relaxed as the pain did not come, when her fingers clutched into soft woollen blanket instead of stone. Slowly, she opened her eyes to see the ceiling. The shadows which had danced there when she’d fallen asleep were now missing, driven away by daylight flooding from a window.

Lucy pushed herself up and held her head. Even though her aches had melted away, it still felt heavy to move. With weary movement, she looked around. Her chest tightened when she found the chamber empty.

There was no notion except for two unmade beds, and the wistfulness in her twisted into mild anger. Why’d they never wake her up when she slept for too long? Why did they always have to go on their things without her? Deep down, she knew they wouldn’t be far, but waking up alone made her feel so left behind.

Especially now, after that dream.

She sat on the edge of the bed and pressed her feet to the cold, wooden floor. Her legs would carry now, but she didn’t feel like she could use magic. Could she ever conjure that bow again? Could she speak like a dragon again? Thinking about it made her head spin. She had too many questions on her mind, but maybe the Greybeards would have the answers. Or maybe all of it had been just a mistake, and the monks would laugh her to death.

Lucy wiped her hair from her face and looked down to see her backpack resting aside her bed. Surprised, she picked it up and went through it. Her journal, spellbooks and the herbs were still there. The guards must have returned it while she had slept, and her assumption was proved true when she noticed Natsu’s and Erza’s bags in the corner of the room. The tension in her chest eased – they’d come back for their things, at least. She’d just have to wait.

She picked up her journal and turned the pages until she found the next empty one. There was no entry for yesterday, but that could be forgiven. With shivering fingers, she took the quill, dipped it in the ink and begun to write.

_25th of Last Seed, E4 201_

_Dear Mom,  
I don’t know what to write to you. I don’t know anything anymore. _

Lucy took in a deep breath as she held back the tears. She wouldn’t let them fall. The letters came out messy and untidy – Mother would scold her for writing so poorly. She forced her fingers to calm down before she continued.

_I dreamt of you last night. You were humming the same song as always, the song I know by heart from hearing it so many times. I keep wondering if there are words in your song, but I guess I’ll never know._

_I feel so lost now. Please, give me some courage. Show me the words of the song which kept you so happy. Send me a sign and tell me I can find my way._

_Because yesterday, I killed a dr-_

Lucy dropped the quill and spilt the ink on paper when the door was kicked open.

”Breakfast’s here!” Natsu shouted as he rushed into the room, showing her a basket full of bread and fruit. Lucy held her hand on her chest, trying to calm her startled heart. The mage laid the food next to her, picked an apple and sat down in his bed.

”Calm down, idiot”, Erza said from the door before walking in. ”Remember what Wuunferth said about letting your arm rest?”

”Damn that old fart to Oblivion, I’ve never felt better”, he answered, taking a bite from the fruit. ”Come on, Lucy, eat up.”

Lucy lifted the inkpot, unfortunately unable to save her journal from the black liquid spreading on the pages. She sighed as she put the cork in the bottle and closed the book. Maybe some of her writings would be readable through the mess once it’d dry. She wiped her hands in her black robes before taking a piece of bread.

”How are you feeling, Lucy?” the warrior asked and seated next to Lucy. ”Did the potions help?”

”I’m okay, now… I guess”, she answered. She had drunk five of them last night. The blue, empty bottles were laid on the floor, a frail smell of mountain flowers lingering in the room. ”Where were you?”

”Getting him patched up.” Erza pointed at the mage who raised his legs on the foot of the bed. ”He woke up all feverish and pale as milk –”

”I didn’t –”

”Yes you did”, she silenced him and turned back to Lucy. ”He didn’t clean his wound yesterday, and so it started to infect. I dragged him to see the court wizard, and now he should be fine. Make sure he’ll keep that clean, and doesn’t strain it too much.”

Lucy nodded. The mage looked pale indeed, but considering how much blood he had lost yesterday, he seemed okay. He was dressed in new, dark-blue robes. Lucy inferred he had bought them from the court wizard, for his old ones had ripped and stained in blood. Now only the rusty marks in his white scarf and his bandaged arm showed what had happened to him.

Lucy found it adorable how Erza had started to care about Natsu. At first, it had looked like those two couldn’t stand each other, but now they seemed like siblings. It was easy to imagine Erza as a strict older sister, and the mage as a mischievous little brother. Had he been like that with his real brother, wild and uncontrollable? Or had losing his brother made him like that?

”I’ll try, if he’ll listen”, Lucy said and peeked over her shoulder to smirk at the mage.

Natsu answered by raising his brows, giving her a nonchalant look as he munched the apple. ”It’s nothing, really -”

”Yell at him if he doesn’t”, Erza interrupted sharply, landing her deathstare on the mage. It took Lucy a moment to understand _why_ she’d have to yell at him. If she had shouted a bear into submission, maybe the mage could be tamed with a little bit rougher tongue.

”Okay, okay, I’ll take care of it”, Natsu shrieked and raised his hands in surrender. ”Just don’t yell at me.”

”That’s right. Do not let him get you into trouble”, Erza said and turned to him. ”And you, do _not_ get her into trouble, or I will personally scold you when we meet again.”

Lucy smiled shortly, though it seemed to her Erza was saying goodbyes. And in fact, she was – Lucy had forgotten Erza would go back to Whiterun today. Lucy would’ve liked to invite her to their team, but didn’t dare. There was so much more she’d like to share and experience with Erza. She had already hoped for another day to spend with her, and fate had delivered. When she’d learn to stop hoping for anything?

It was such a pity their group would break apart.

”So, where are we heading next?” Natsu asked, having finished the apple. ”Do you want to answer the summons right ahead or will we stop at Winterhold first?”

Lucy fell silent for a moment. She didn’t know how long it would take to reach the High Hrothgar. The monastery was seated in the slopes of the Throat of the World, and they would have to head back to Ivarstead, where the steps to the top began. They were so close to Winterhold it would be a shame to turn back now, even if they had more important business waiting for them elsewhere.

”I’d like to visit the College first. Maybe the monks would accept that”, Lucy said. ”I know it’s selfish, but we’re so close, maybe a day or two wouldn’t make them mad.”

”Well, if we leave today, we’ll be in Winterhold tomorrow. It’s not a long way.”

”I think you should join the College before going to the monastery”, Erza commented. ”It’s your choice to answer the summons, after all. The Greybeards can wait. They’ll only guide you in the Voice, not in the magic.”

”So it’s decided. Winterhold it is”, Natsu said and rose from the bed, stretching his limbs before grabbing his bag. ”Shall we get going?”

Lucy nodded and ate the last bit of the bread. The ink on her journal had tried enough now, and she put it into her backpack. She got up, her legs still numb, but after a few steps, she felt steady again. She swung the backpack on her shoulder, and sadness crept into her heart as she remembered her hunting bow was gone. Lucy waited while Natsu packed their food, and then the warrior opened the door, leading them to the hallway.

”I wonder what’s the reward the Jarl promised for you”, Natsu said as they walked down the narrow aisle, towards the stairs. ”And if they found my glass dagger, it would be nice. I don’t wanna get my hopes up, but I’ve been missing it. I had it for years.”

Father had once told her how glass weapons weren’t actually made of glass like windows and ornaments, but of malachite and moonstone. Though they appeared glass-like, the green material was strong and fine.

”Glass weapons are quite expensive”, Lucy answered, ignoring the mage’s first question. She didn’t want to think any reward for herself, because she still didn’t feel like she’d deserve any. ”I remember some of them have passed through our store, and they always fetched a high price. Did you buy yours or find it somewhere?”

”I actually got it from one of the older mages from the College. Gildarts was the wizard’s name. He gave it to me before he left for a mission, but it has been years. I haven’t seen him since.”

Lucy's interest peaked every time the mage spoke about his fellow wizards of the College. He didn't do that too often. ”He still isn’t back? Do all of your missions last for years?”

”Not often, but this man always has some epic journeys. He’s quite a nomad, rarely around.”

”I bet he has many epic stories to tell. I'd like to hear some of them.”

”He does”, Natsu said, a strange grin on his face. ”But believe me, his stories are sometimes really nasty. There was a time when he –”

”Please, don’t tell her"; Erza's command stopped him. "She doesn’t need to know.”

The mage turned to look at the warrior walking behind them. ”Did I tell you?” 

”Your friend Igneel told me after you had passed out, and it still burns my ears to remember it.”

”Are you sure we’re talking about the same story?” Natsu asked, brows furrowing. 

”I’m sure Lucy doesn’t want to know _any_ of those stories.”

Natsu shrugged, rolling his eyes. ”I can tell you later when she’s gone”, he whispered to Lucy, and she answered with a sneer. She had heard many nasty stories before, mostly from Haming. The boy had a mouth full of dirt, but sometimes those stories had made her laugh. Harder than she’d like to admit.

”Speaking of when I’m gone”, Erza started, making Lucy flinch. ”I have to report my discoveries to Whiterun’s court wizard, but I won’t tell him about you, Lucy. The Dragonborn’s identity should be classified information. No-one else than us shall know.”

”I agree”, the mage answered, his tone now serious. ”There are a lot of weird cults out there, and who knows what they’re about. Some of them might still worship the dragons, and they could hurt the one who can slay them.”

Lucy raised her shoulders, staring down and keeping her voice low. ”Nobody would believe it’s me anyway.”

”What do people even think the Dragonborn looks like?” Natsu wondered aloud. ”Some big blond Nord guy with a horned helm and an iron sword?”

She glanced at the mage and frowned. ”That’s how you thought they’d be?”

”Actually I had no idea. But Lucy, it’s good you don’t quite look like the one who can kill the dragons. Nobody can suspect it's you. You have a good cover.”

Lucy let the silence fall as they reached the end of the stairs. Erza opened the door which led to the Great Hall, and let them step in before her. Lucy looked at the throne, seeing Jarl Ulfric seated there, with his men standing by his side.

The time had come for their paths to separate.

”I think this is it, brats”, Erza sighed and turned towards them, wistfully smiling. ”Come meet me in Whiterun one day. I’ll let the Companions know that the Jorrvaskr is open to you.”

Lucy answered her smile. ”Thank you. For everything”, she said quietly, trying to hide the sadness in her voice. Then she swung at the armoured woman, wrapping her arms around Erza’s neck and pressing her cheek against the plate of steel. Lucy wanted to cling at her for a moment longer, but Erza gave her two pats on the back before letting her go. 

”Goodbye for now, then”, Erza said and nodded at Natsu. Lucy glanced at him, and though he wouldn’t hug her, he didn’t seem to be at ease with the departure either. Lucy wasn’t sure if it was real or if she imagined it, but the warrior’s eyes watered.

”Goodbye, Scarlet”, the mage said, waving his hand as she turned to leave.

”Don’t call me that.”

”Is Beast better?”

”Yes”, Erza said, wiping her eyes. ”Beast is better.”

Natsu smiled, but it died down when Erza walked to the main entrance of the palace. The guards opened the great doors, and then the armoured woman was gone. Lucy felt her heart sinking as she realised how attached she had grown to Erza in this short time they had known. She had become her friend, and she’d never forget her. Maybe they would meet again, someday.

”Come on, the Jarl’s waiting”, Natsu said. Lucy glanced into his eyes, shades of sadness dwelling in the greens. He had to feel the same. It brought comfort to Lucy – at least she could miss her with him, even though he’d never admit it.

But, there was no place for such things in this world, not now.

Lucy walked across the hall with the mage by her side. Despite wanting to run after Erza, she knew this was more important. Ulfric must have been running out of patience, and making him angry was the last thing Lucy wanted.

Lucy stopped before the Jarl’s throne and made a curtsey, while Natsu didn’t even bow. Was this the beginning of their downward spiral after Erza leaving their company? She’d scold him for not respecting the Jarl, but gladly the man didn’t seem to care. Ignoring the mage’s lack of manners, Ulfric went straight into the business at hand.

”You’ve done a great deed for me and my city, Lucy Heartfilia”, he started, his loud voice filling the entire hall like thunder. ”You have my eternal gratitude. If there’s ever anything you need, don’t hesitate to come to me. And please, accept this gift from my personal armoury.”

One of the soldiers brought her a bow made from black wood, and a quiver full of arrows. Speechless, she received it, feeling its weight in her hands. It’s beauty rivalled with the ethereal bow she had summoned, and suddenly it didn’t even matter if she’d ever be able to cast it again. Her heart filled with pride like never before.

”It’s a supple bow of the ancient Nords, enchanted with the spell of paralysis”, Ulfric explained while she admired the bow. ”May it bring down your foes and aid you in the battle against the evil.”

Lucy raised her eyes from the weapon and looked straight at the Jarl. ”Thank you.”

”And you, a mage from Dragonbridge, we found your dagger. Here, have it back with a little bit of gold. It’s meant for you both.”

The guard gave a gleaming green dagger to Natsu, and tossed a bag of clinking coins to him. The amount seemed ridiculous to Lucy. That was _a little_? They could live like the noblemen for a month with that money. With widened eyes, Natsu stared at the blade to get sure it was really his. As he showed no signs of refusing, it seemed it was.

”You’re going to answer the Greybeard’s summons?” Ulfric asked while Lucy secured the bow in her back. ”Is there anything else I can do to help you forward on your journey? ”

”I will after I’ve visited the College of Winterhold”, she answered with a faked confidence. ”And this gold is more than enough to –”

”You shouldn’t waste time travelling”, Ulfric interrupted sternly. ”I’ll lend you my fastest horses and arrange the carriage to leave in an hour, so you’ll arrive tonight.”

”What?” Natsu exclaimed and spread his arms in refusal. ”Fuck no –”

Though Lucy remembered what Natsu had said about travelling in a carriage, she agreed with the Jarl. The faster they could travel, the better. She felt still weak, the magic deficiency draining her strength. She couldn't walk to Winterhold. 

”Natsu, I don’t think we have a choice”, Lucy hissed at him to make him shut up. She turned towards the Jarl again and said, ”Thank you. We’ll be at the stables in an hour.”

The Jarl’s nodded. ”Talos guide you, Dragonborn”, he greeted, sending them off.

Natsu stared at Lucy with a dagger in his other hand and a bag of gold in the other, frozen and mute. The dread of their upcoming journey was clear on his pale face, every cell of him in a state of perfect resistance. But he had promised to protect her, and so that promise was put on a test.

”Seriously, I’d rather die than –” Natsu muttered, his voice fading as Lucy walked past him.

”You can walk”, she said. ”But I will not.”

Mumbling silent curses to himself, Natsu followed her across the hall. Lucy knew he’d come with her, but even if he wouldn’t, she’d be fine. She wouldn’t let anything bring her down. With the bow of her ancestors in her back, Lucy felt like a hero.

* * *

The light hurt Natsu’s eyes as they walked down the streets of Windhelm, the day dawning cold and bright. He felt worse than he dared to admit, his arm still throbbing and head pounding from the lack of sleep. The pain had kept him awake to the wee hours of the night, and Erza had dragged him out of bed too early. Her strict schedule was one of the things he wouldn’t miss.

A freezing wind blew through the alleys, forcing Natsu to wrap himself into his fur cloak. While he had spent a while in warmer regions of Skyrim, his bones hadn’t forgotten the cold he had grown used to. Winterhold was _always_ cold, possibly the coldest place in the country. The College wasn’t any warmer, the winds of the Sea of Ghost blasting through the creaks in the stone walls. Natsu had at least five fur blankets in his bed and he still shivered every night.

His mind struggled to understand he’d sleep there again tonight. To his surprise, it upset him. He had considered the College his home, but it didn’t feel the same without Igneel. This was the first time he returned from a journey without him. Would the halls be quiet now, all laughter gone? How would the others take the news of his death?

At least Lucy would be there, but how would she settle in? Would she make her home there, as he had? 

”Hey, wanna go check the marketplace?” Natsu asked her. He needed a distraction from the pain, his thoughts, pretty much everything. His mind had fallen out of the wagon a while ago, and he needed time to get back on track. Besides, he wanted to forget he’d have to climb into a cart soon. He understood the urgency of their situation, yes, but it didn’t make him want to die any less.

Lucy didn’t answer, but Natsu noticed her eyes landing on the beggars begging on the sides of the street. They leaned against the stone wall with empty cups in their bare, frost-bitten hands. Some of them were former, wounded soldiers, some of them were skooma addicts, and Natsu knew any amount of gold wouldn’t help them. He wanted to move on, feeling uneasy watching how the men and women shivered in the cold. 

”Lady, would you buy some flowers?” a quiet voice said behind them. ”Please?”

Both of them turned around, their eyes widening at the sight. A young girl stood there with a basket full of flowers, smiling a smile which hit like a dagger in Natsu’s chest. She looked so broken, dressed in ripped rags and an oversized cloak. She couldn’t be much older than ten.

”Who are you?” Lucy asked, concern resonating through her words. ”Where are your parents?”

”They… They’re dead”, the girl answered, keeping her eyes locked in Lucy’s. ”My Mama died when I was little. I… I don’t remember her very well. My father was a Stormcloak soldier. One day he left and… didn’t come back. I’m all alone. I try to sell flowers so I can buy food. It’s not much, but what else can I do?”

Lucy’s lips started to quiver, and she pulled Natsu back from his sleeve. He felt ill in his stomach, and it wasn’t from the journey ahead of them. The fates of beggars rarely interested him, but orphaned children living on the street were personal. He had once been almost like that girl, young and homeless while on his way to the College.

He remembered it too well how scary it was to be all alone in the cold world.

”Natsu, how much did we get from the Jarl?” Lucy whispered to him while they were out of earshot, behind a corner of a stone wall.

”Around a thousand gold, maybe."

”Give her a hundred.”

”Are you sure it’s a good idea?" Natsu asked. "Skooma addicts threaten orphans to beg for them, and the money they get goes straight into the drugs.”

That’s what they had said when Natsu had asked for money. One elderly woman had given him fresh bread, but no coin. Otherwise, he had to earn the gold he needed to survive. He had chopped wood for the most of it. It had been familiar work, but exhausting. Even to this day, he dreaded axes and chopping blocks. For many reasons.

”I don’t want to believe that. She needs to be helped. She’s just a kid.”

Natsu sighed, not wanting to argue with her. She meant well, and they had more gold now than they could spend. He had a hundred gold of his own money in a smaller bag. It would be a lot less suspicious to give it to her in secret instead of separating the coins from the bigger bag. He didn’t want to gain any unwanted attention to them. Tension in Lucy's eyes eased when she saw him approving her intention.

Natsu gestured at the girl, urging her to come to them.

”What’s your name?” he asked when she appeared. 

”It’s… Sofie", the girl answered. Natsu didn't feel like she was lying. Her voice was meek and shivering, and Natsu didn't even want to know what she had been through. The streets were rough for homeless little girls. 

”Well, Sofie, take this", Natsu said, offering her a small bag of gold. "Use it to hire a carriage to Riften. There’s an orphanage there. I know it’s not the nicest place, but it’s far better than being a beggar here. Someone could adopt you from there, get you in a real family if you’re just patient.”

The girl stared at him under her brows, both confusion and fear mixing on her face. Then she shook her head.

”I’ve… I’ve heard about that orphanage”, she whispered. ”My friend, Aventus, he… His mother died a while back, and he was sent to Riften. There's a rumour that he returned. They said that the place was horrible, and the headmistress evil and cruel. Some even say that he's... he's...”

Lucy leaned closer to the girl. ”He’s what?”

”He’s performing the Black Sacrament.”

Shock shot through Natsu's spine, yet he struggled not to show it. How could a little runt be performing the _Black Sacrament?_ Summoning a Dark Brotherhood to assassinate the orphanage’s keeper? The ritual itself was too grotesque for a child to commit. If it was true, it had to be a bad place. It was dangerous such information was spreading across the city.

”Aventus lives here?” Lucy asked. 

”Yes, in the Stone Quarters, in his family’s old home. Aretino is the name.”

Natsu glanced at Lucy but failed to read her thoughts through her expression. For a moment, she fell into her mind, trying to decide what to do.

”Don't worry about it, we will figure it out", she said then. ”You don’t have to go to the orphanage before it gets better out there. But you need food and shelter, or you’re not going to see the flowers of the next summer. So please, accept this gold. Buy yourself food and warm clothes.”

Hesitantly, Sofie looked at the coin purse, as if it was too good to be true. A trap. Maybe someone had trapped her before. She took long, deep glances in Lucy's eyes, then at Natsu's. Finally confirmed of their sincerity, she took the purse. ”Thank you, lady… and mister!”

”And there’s this thing”, Lucy continued, ”I’m friends with Jarl Ulfric. Go to him, and say Lucy Heartfilia asks him to help you out.”

”Really? Can’t be… Just, wow", the girl said, sparkling pure joy. ”Thanks… Thanks for talking to me. The Divines bless your kind hearts!”

The girl bowed to them, and the wind blew off some flowers from her basket. She didn’t bother to pick them up as she left running to the Palace of Kings, nervously shaking from excitement. Natsu hadn’t seen happiness so pure in many years. If the gods did exist, maybe they could grant them a blessing for the good deed of the day. 

Strangely, with Erza gone, different colours started to shine through Lucy. The shy girl Natsu had found in Helgen's ruins was coming out of her shell, taking the space she deserved. 

”What are you going to do now?” Natsu asked when the little girl was gone. "Shall we go to the marketplace now?"

”Going to talk to that boy”, she answered. ”We still have some time left.”

Natsu crossed his arms on his chest, sighing. ”We really shouldn’t mess with the Brotherhood’s territory...”

”Let’s just talk to him and see if there’s anything we can do about it. Orphans have suffered enough when they lost their parents! They don’t have to suffer more.”

Natsu didn’t agree with her, but she had a point. It didn’t sit right with him if the children really were mistreated in the orphanage, so maybe it was better to talk to that boy. Then they could figure out what to do if they’d do anything. But the Black Sacrament thing, that had to be only a rumour. No child could really be doing it. Without saying anything, Natsu set forth into the Stone Quarters, Lucy following by his side. If checking out for the boy made Lucy happy, Natsu would go along. 

They walked in silence through the snowy streets. They passed the Candleheart Hall and the main gates of the city, soon reaching the Aretino residence. Their name was carved into the side of the house. As Natsu had expected, the door was locked. No-one answered when he knocked. "No-one's there. Let's head to the -"

”Let’s see about this one...” Lucy said, glancing over her shoulder to make sure there were no guards in sight. She pulled a lockpick from her pocket and crouched in front of the door. Natsu’s brows raised so high he was sure they hit his hairline.

”Are you seriously going to –”, Natsu whispered, but then the door creaked open. Lucy gave him a wicked grin. ” _How_ did you learn to pick locks?”

Lucy rose up and pat his back, urging him to sneak in before anyone caught them. ”This is the stupidest thing in the world. The boy's probably in Riften anyway, and we're not supposed to be here”, Natsu mumbled as he pulled the door closed after stepping in.

They arrived in a stairway which led to the upper floor of the building. Staying silent, they listened for suspicious noises, and Natsu’s heart begun to race as he heard muffled chanting coming from the upstairs, accompanied by a knocking sound. As if someone repeatedly stabbed the floor.

’ _Sweet Mother, Sweet Mother, send your child onto me...’_

”Do you hear that?” Lucy asked, and Natsu answered with a nod.

’… _for the sins of the unworthy must be baptized in blood and fear.’_

* * *

**A/N: Windhelm streets:**

  
  


**Hi guys! What did you think of this chapter? I introduced a new character in the beginning, who do you think he was? He’s a character from Fairy Tail who’ll replace a few Skyrim characters, lore wise.**

**I had some struggles while writing this chapter. This was a difficult one because writing transition chapters is quite hard – the previous part of the story comes to an end, while the next one has to be established.**

**Natsu and Lucy are on their own now with Erza out of the picture, and it will change the dynamics between them. I’ve also been really stressed out in my personal life and I wasn’t in a mood to write until now. I made some changes in this chapter and made things more interesting for me. I'm inspired again! Originally, I planned they’d just go shopping in the marketplace, but my brain didn’t agree with that. I’m not really into filler content, and I want everything to be relevant to the story at hand. There’s going to be one-chapter mini arc before they finally go to the College.**


	17. INNOCENCE LOST

_'Grelod, you old crone. You'll get what you deserve. The Dark Brotherhood will see to that… Die, Grelod, die!'_

Natsu's chest tightened as he listened to he muffled, repeated stabbing. Someone was upstairs, but was that the Aretino boy, or someone else? Could it truly be just a kid? Natsu didn't want to figure it out. Instead, he wanted to grab Lucy and leave. 

Whenever the Dark Brotherhood was mentioned, it meant nothing good.

"Lucy", he whispered sharply to catch her attention. "I say we get the fuck outta here. Now."

"But -"

_'Please… How long must I do this? I keep praying, Night Mother, why won't you answer me?'_

The voice didn't belong to a grown-up man, but to an adolescent boy. The distant chanting turned into sobbing. Lucy's eyes filled with worry as she glanced at Natsu. Whoever it was, he walked on a dark path. His actions would only lead to ruin.

"He's desperate", she whispered, and Natsu's stomach twisted. He heard it too. The utter despair.

_'I'm so tired… so very tired…'_

Lucy bit her lower lip, brows pinching together as she tried to figure out what to do. "We have to check if he's okay", she decided

Natsu shook his head. It needed no checking to know the boy was far from okay. But was this really something they had to stick their heads into? Especially now when Lucy needed to stay away from unnecessary dangers. If the townspeople were talking about this, why didn't they intervene? 

"This isn't any of our business, so let's just – "

"You can wait down here if you're scared, but I'm going", Lucy scoffed as she stepped into the stairs, the wood creaking under her feet. Natsu rolled his eyes and followed her. _'Nords are stubborn. So. Fucking. Stubborn_ ', he thought, not daring to utter it out loud. _'And they said I have a thick skull.'_

Natsu climbed up the stairs after Lucy, the voices becoming louder as they reached the upper floor. Nervous unsettlement boiled in Natsu's chest. He had promised to not lead her into trouble, but his power could only stretch so far. Lucy was determined to help the children of Windhelm, even if it meant risking her safety.

But wasn't that what heroes did? Selflessly helped those who needed it the most? 

Lucy walked into the vacant living hall. A thick layer of dust covered the furniture, but the empty pots and clothes cluttering the floor showed someone had lived there recently. Faint candlelight came from the alcove, painting a shadowy figure on the wall. Slowly, Lucy sneaked closer and peeked behind the corner. Natsu stayed behind and held his breath as she spoke.

"Uhm… Hey, are you alright?"

A deadly silence fell to the house.

The sobbing and the stabbing stopped, and Natsu's mind filled with panicky regret. _'What if the kid gets hostile?'_ he thought, realising his mistake. _'Damn, why am I behind her? I should've checked this, not her.'_

The shadow moved on the wall. Natsu stepped closer to Lucy and put his hand on the hilt of his dagger, ready to draw it out if needed. His heart jumped to his throat when a black-haired boy emerged from the alcove, wearing a wide smile.

"It worked! I knew you'd come, I just knew it!" the boy exclaimed and wiped the dust from his torn, red shirt. "I did the Black Sacrament, over and over, with the body and the… things. And then you came! Assassins from the Dark Brotherhood!"

Natsu and Lucy exchanged confused looks as the boy stared at them, his dark eyes lit in joy. His clothes hung loosely on his thin body as if he hadn't eaten anything in weeks. Judging from that, he couldn't be anyone else than Aventus Aretino. Kids who escaped from orphanages rarely knew how to cook for themselves. He looked around twelve, maybe thirteen years old. 

As the kid showed no signs of hostility, Natsu let his eyes wander past the boy. In the alcove behind him were candles formed in a circle. They surrounded an effigy made from bones and flesh, arranged in the shape of a human. A dagger was struck in the centre of the horrific thing, with petals of nightshade strewn on the floor.

Natsu opened his mouth, struggling to get any words out. "We're not who you think we –"

"Yes, of course", Lucy interrupted his nervous mumbling. "The Black Sacrament..."

Blankly, the mage stared at Lucy, unable to believe what she had just said. Was she really going to pretend to be an assassin to make the boy stop that madness? The rumours of the Aretino boy trying to summon the Dark Brotherhood had been true, and they were spreading all over the city. Someone must've heard his frantic efforts, and the sooner he'd stop it, the better. It would make an end to the rumours, hopefully.

"It took so long, so very long… But now you're finally here, you can accept my contract!" Aventus declared, his tone confident and strong.

"Contract?" Lucy blinked and asked, causing Natsu to cringe. If she tried to pretend she was from the Brotherhood, she should try a little bit harder. Show some professionalism. _'By Sheogorath's beard, what are you doing?'_ he thought, but retreated to the back of the room. He wasn't sure if he could keep his mouth shut otherwise.

"My mother, she… she died, and I was sent to that horrible orphanage in Riften", Aventus responded gloomily, crossing his arms on his chest. "Honorhall. The headmistress is an evil, cruel woman. They call her Grelod the Kind. But she's not kind. She's terrible. To all of us. So I ran away and came home. Then I did the Sacrament, and now you're here! And you can kill Grelod the Kind!"

Natsu turned his back at them as he realised what was going on. He slammed his palm on his forehead, dragging his fingers down his face. 

_'No, no, no, Lucy, just –'_

"Are you sure about this?" she questioned. "Murdering this woman?"

_' – do not accept that.'_

"I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life", Aventus assured. "Someone like Grelod doesn't deserve to live one more day. She's a monster!"

Lucy gave him a long look, then she nodded. "Okay, we'll… The Dark Brotherhood will see to it."

Natsu wanted to burst into laughter and tears at the same time. He couldn't believe Lucy had accepted the boy's plea, even if it had been a lie. She couldn't really mean to kill the headmistress, Natsu knew. If she had been thrown over by killing a bandit in self-defence, she couldn't bring herself to kill a leader of an orphanage. It just… had to be a sham. There was no other way.

"You just… Wait, and clean up… that mess. Grelod the Kind will meet her fate, eventually", Lucy affirmed, and the boy replied with an obedient nod. Then Natsu realised what Lucy intended. Aventus had called Grelod _'the old crone_ ', which meant the elderly woman could meet her end by natural means, sooner or later.

In some sense, it was clever of her.

As the tension in the air released, Natsu dared to take a better look at the place. There were two small beds in the room, which he found strange. The boy probably had lived only with his mother, his father seemingly absent. That would explain why he'd been sent to the orphanage. Losing his only parent must've driven the poor boy insane. Insane enough to try to summon the Dark Brotherhood to help him out.

And it terrified Natsu how strongly he related to that.

"What happened to your mom, boy?" the mage asked, surprising himself by speaking. The question just came out of his mouth. The boy's eyes flitted to him, slightly widening before sorrow narrowed them again.

"She… she got sick last year when the snows came. She just… never got better", Aventus answered quietly. "One night she fell asleep and… never woke up."

Natsu felt a strike in his heart, in a wound he thought he'd hardened a long time ago. Unable to say anything, he simply nodded as a flood of suppressed emotions washed over him. First, the homeless girl brought back the time he wandered around Skyrim on his way to the College, and then this boy reminded him why he'd left in the first place. 

Mom's death. The pain and sorrow mixed in relief of knowing she could finally rest. And just like it had been for Arentino, the aftermath had been almost worse than the actual loss.

When the mage zoned out to relive the night he had dug mom's grave with dad, Lucy tugged his sleeve and brought him back to the present moment. Natsu glanced at her quickly, meeting her brown eyes full of compassion so unfamiliar to him. As if she had read his thoughts, heard the story in his silence. Growing uncomfortable, he had to look away before he'd reveal too much.

"Please hurry. To be honest, I'm kind of lonely here", Aventus said, noticing they were about to take their leave. "As much as I hated getting sent to Honorhall, I really miss my friends there..."

"It's alright now", Lucy consoled and turned towards the stairway, prompting Natsu to follow her. "Everything will be taken care of."

Aventus waved at them as they disappeared to the stairs. Lucy waved back at him, but Natsu couldn't. The haunting echo of loss lingered in his chest, crawling up to his throat to strangle him. Part of him wanted to stay behind and talk with that boy like he'd talk to the younger version of himself.

He had also been thirteen and motherless.

Maybe he wouldn't say anything wise, for there was no wisdom in a loss that great. Only pain. But he wanted to warn that boy to turn away from that path before it would be too late. It wasn't good to be alone now. If Igneel hadn't caught him then, he would've fallen into someplace dark as well.

Lucy creaked the door open and checked the street was empty before stepping out. Natsu followed and closed the door behind him. The daylight burned his eyes again, and the fresh air failed to make him feel any better. And the way Lucy seemed unbothered about all of that, it just... it bugged him the wrong way. If Sofie's fate had made her emotional, why was she so calm now?

"What the fuck was that all about?" Natsu asked her while they walked down the street, anger in his tone covering his underlying sadness. "Pretending to be an assassin from the Dark Brotherhood? Really?"

Natsu tried to switch his focus from his past to the present, but it wasn't easy. Damn, it was so fucking far from easy. Even Lucy with her fair hair braided reminded him of mom. Her hair had always been braided, even when it became brittle and thin towards the end. 

"Yes? The boy was tormented", Lucy responded and peered around again. With no-one there to hear them, she halted. "He had to be helped. Somehow. Couldn't you see how his eyes sparkled when we finally came?"

Natsu stopped next to her. His eyes narrowed as he lowered his voice. "Do you just… Do you know _anything_ about the Brotherhood? What they could do to you if you mess with them?"

Lucy cocked her head, shrugging her right shoulder. "They're assassins? They'd... assassinate me, I guess?"

Natsu threw his back at the stone wall, slowly trickling down to the ground. He buried his face into his hands and let out a long, painful sigh. His headache crept back and the wound in his arm reminded him of its existence. The potions the court wizard had given him were wearing off, just as if he didn't feel miserable enough already.

"For fuck's sake", he mumbled into his palms.

"What?"

Natsu took a deep breath as he placed his hands on his knees and looked Lucy into the eyes. "You should be more cautious", he sighed, meaning it fully. 

His brother had told him stories about the Dark Brotherhood. Natsu had been six when Zeref had left for the College, but he remembered him vividly, especially the things they did together. Once Zeref found a book called _'A Kiss, Sweet Mother'_. It had contained the exact instructions of the Black Sacrament.

The Daedra weren't the only controversial thing Zeref was interested in.

 _'If you ever need to see someone dead, do this, and the Night Mother will answer your prayers'_ , Zeref had said with a twisted grin while they had read the book. Natsu had been too young to understand it, but the description of the ritual was so grotesquely detailed he could still recall it years later. Aventus must have gotten his hands on the same book. There was no other way a kid would know how to do it.

There had been one moment in Natsu's life when he had actually considered doing it too, and he hadn't been much older than Aventus.

"Just calm down. We'll never have to hear about this again", Lucy assured full of naive faith. "All that matters is that at least he believes someone is going to… solve his problem. He had been doing that a long time, and no-one from the Brotherhood had talked to him. What if they don't even exist anymore?"

"They do. They do exist. And I wouldn't mess with them if I were you", Natsu warned, remembering rather well what the Companion had told him. "Damn, Erza has been away for an hour and look where we're at."

A playful grin appeared on Lucy's face. "You miss her?"

Ignoring the question, Natsu shook his head and continued. "She of all people wouldn't have let you go there."

"Well, there's nothing we can do about it anymore", Lucy retorted, her tone getting annoyed. "What's done is done. Let the poor boy rest and clear his thoughts."

Natsu didn't know how to answer that. He let the silence fall as he leaned against the wall, the snow beneath him chilling his legs. He wanted to bury his throbbing arm into the snow too, but couldn't risk infecting it again. Chewing his lower lip, he tried to keep away the resurfacing memories. But they just came, swarming around him like gnats in a summer night.

"You're making this bigger than it really is", Lucy said, making Natsu scoff. He covered his face with his hands again to shield his eyes from the sun, and to cover the tears he couldn't fight back anymore.

If there was a magic spell to make him forget everything that ever happened to him, he'd use it without a moment's doubt.

"It's… It's… just..." he stuttered into his palms, failing to make up an excuse. What could he say? His past wasn't kind of a subject he wanted to open to anyone. Even Igneel had known only a fracture of it, nothing more. Talking about it made him feel weak and small. 

"You took it personally", she said silently, stepped next to him and leaned against the wall. Her gaze wandered above the snow-covered roofs. "You lost your mother at his age, and now it's all coming back to you, am I right?"

A cold wind brushed against them as silence fell again. As if Lucy had a sixth sense, she had read his mind and found the reason behind his sudden sulking. Natsu couldn't understand how she did that, but it made him embarrassed. Maybe he had told her too much, but then again, what would it matter? 

Perhaps she did that to forget her own pain. While some curled into themselves, some turned into others. Lucy seemed to belong to the latter group, and she could be trusted. Lucy wasn't mocking him or anything. She sincerely wanted to listen and help.

He had thought the events of Helgen would've turned a new page in the story of his life, but it wasn't like that. Even a dragon couldn't burn away his past. It would always be there. And the longer he'd keep it all inside, the larger hole it would gnaw into his heart. 

He didn't want to end up like his dad. Old, bitter and angry. 

"You know, my dad said I'll end up in an orphanage", Natsu started quietly, placing his hands below his chin. He stared into the mountain tops shimmering in the distance, behind the city walls. "When I… ran from home. He said the guards would catch me and send me to Honorhall."

"But why? If your dad was still alive, why would've they taken you to Riften?" Lucy asked, but fell quiet for a moment. "You said you didn't leave in very good terms, so..."

Natsu had already told her how he left home, but never the details. It was the morning after they had buried mom. Natsu had stayed up all night thinking and planning, and packed up his things at dawn. And while eating breakfast Natsu had told his father he was going to leave to the College. He hadn't asked for permission. It had been a declaration. He was going, and that was final.

Father had stood up so fast that he threw the table down, the plates and mugs breaking as they fell to the floor.

"Yeah", Natsu chuckled dryly. "He pretty much denied I'm his son."

On that day, he knew his childhood had come to an end, the innocence of a child now lost.

Natsu felt Lucy's gaze on him as she whispered, "So he was _that_ furious."

"To put it lightly, yes", Natsu admitted. "But I can understand it now. He was sick with rockjoint and would've needed help at home. He must have thought I'd take care of him until he'd die, and got mad when I selfishly left him alone."

Years back, it had bothered him a lot. Sometimes he wanted to go back and make up with his father, but after thinking about it for a while he realised they just wouldn't be able to reconcile. Father was hard-headed like a goat, and kept an iron grudge. He wouldn't forgive. And because he hadn't died yet, it meant he had survived just fine without anyone's help. A letter of inheritance would be the first and the last thing he would contact his outcast son with.

"But you did it to pursue your own path in life", Lucy reassured with a sympathetic smile. "I used to dream about running away, too."

Natsu answered the smile but hid it into his hands. "But you never did."

"I didn't dare. How old were you then? Thirteen? And nobody caught you?"

"Nobody gave a shit", he shrugged. "Like nobody gave a shit about that Sofie. Nobody cares about lonely kids running around until they're performing the Black fucking Sacrament. And not even then it seems."

In an ideal world, children wouldn't be orphaned or homeless, but not in reality. With the wars raging around, diseases spreading around the country, and the cold winters taking their toll, too many had to bid farewell to their families. People had grown used to it. 

"How did you make it?" Lucy asked, turning to look at him. "To the College. It's a long way from Dragonbridge to Winterhold."

"It's a long story."

"Tell me about it? I'd like to know."

Natsu glanced at her, too confused to say anything. Did she really care, or did she just love good stories? His story would be far from good. Even he didn't like to revisit it too often. It always left him feeling like this. Like shit. 

"Shouldn't we be like, getting to the stables already?" he asked.

"Oh shit, I almost forgot!" she cried, making Natsu smile shortly. He still found it strange when she spoke like that. She looked like a girl who didn't swear, but it seemed she was full of surprises. "Come on, get up and let's go. You can tell me on the way? It will get boring on the road."

Lucy lent a hand for him, helping him get up. Natsu took it and pulled himself on his feet, then let go and wiped the snow from his robes. He didn't know how much time had passed, but he was sure it was time to go. His mind filled with a different kind of dread, but he welcomed it with open arms. Anything was better than dwelling in his past sorrows. 

"If I can speak from vomiting, then I might", Natsu said as they hurried through the city. Gladly they weren't far away from the main gates. Guards opened the heavy doors for them, allowing them to leave the city.

"Is there any potions for that?" Lucy asked as they stepped on the bridge leading to the other side of the river. It looked strange in daylight. They could see as far as into the Sea of Ghosts.

"I don't know", Natsu shrugged. "I haven't ever even heard anyone else getting sick on riding a carriage. Igneel laughed when I told about it for the first time. He didn't believe it until he saw me puking off the cart."

"Well, I haven't met anyone with pink hair either. Could it be connected?" Lucy wondered. "To the nightshade poisoning. Just because you came up alive doesn't mean it wouldn't have any other consequences than your hair."

"Never thought about it that way, but maybe..."

He could smell the stables when they reached the end of the bridge. Though horses weren't the reason behind Natsu's sickness, he always associated their smell to carriage rides, and it alone was enough to twist his stomach.

"Have you ever rode a horse? Does that make you sick?" Lucy asked.

Natsu lifted his shoulders. "Not too many times, but I can't remember feeling sick then", he answered. "But carriages, they're just... fucking worst. I'm sitting still but moving around and it makes no fucking sense."

It had started when Natsu had been little. As a poor farmer family, they could never travel far from home. Especially with a carriage. Natsu's first time in a cart had been when Zeref got ill. He had been feverish for a week and started having seizures, so his parents took him to Solitude to see a proper healer. Natsu had been too young to be left alone, so he came with them.

When the wagon had left the stables, Natsu felt his insides twisting into one miserable knot. He had shivered and vomited until they reached Solitude, making his mother a nervous wreck. She had thought Natsu had gotten ill too, and they didn't have enough money to get treatment for their both sons. But when the wagons stopped, his sickness disappeared to the thin air. Fortunately.

It would've been an easy choice for his parents to decide which one they would cure.

The healers in Solitude found out Zeref didn't have a deadly disease. Instead, he had ingested poisonous herbs during his alchemy research. He survived with the right antidotes, but the treatment cost a fortune. It took all of their little savings and more, but Zeref lived, and it was all that mattered to his parents. To let the prodigy live.

Even then Natsu had known that if it had been him, they would've let him die.

Lucy led him to the stables, where they met one of the Jarl's men. As inconspicuously as he could, he led the mages to a carriage. He gave them a bag containing warmer clothes, for sitting still without proper protection from the cold would be fatal in the worst case.

Reluctantly, Natsu climbed into the cart after Lucy. "I'm going to fucking die."

"You can't", Lucy playfully knocked her elbow to his side as she took a seat. "Because you can't show me the College if you do. I can hold your hair while you puke, but just don't die."

"Just knock me unconscious."

Lucy smiled at him when the cart started moving, and maybe he was just imagining it, but suddenly it didn't feel as bad as he remembered.

He would manage, for he knew would soon be back in a place he could call home. 

* * *

**A/N: Aventus doing the ritual and Windhelm Stables**

**By the way, I edited the first chapter and will edit chapters 2-5 later once I got enough time. I started this fic as a side project and so the first chapters weren't really my best, and now as this fic has become my main project I want the first chapters to be better.**

**I also added photos to every chapter if you want to check them!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Hope you liked this chapter. Even though this was quite a "filler chapter", it started something in this story which will be completed much later. Every "side quest" in this story will be woven into the main storyline. What do you think, will Lucy really kill Grelod the Kind? Or was she just playing around?
> 
> One of my favourite things about writing this AU is giving them different family backgrounds compared to the anime. Especially Natsu's dysfunctional family is hugely different from the original content, but it gives him more depth as a character. It's going to affect him a lot, especially later on in the story.
> 
> Even though I'm really hyped about this story and can't wait to write everything I've planned, I can't seem to update faster than once or twice a month. It's hard to find time for writing, and when I do get time, I'm too stressed out to focus on writing. But I'm proud of myself for being able to write this much, despite this situation. 
> 
> I also got the outline for "book one" ready! It's going to have 50-70 chapters to finish, and probably 300k words or more. There's going to be a "second book" after this one is completed, so it's going to be a long ride.
> 
> Next up, they'll finally reach the College of Winterhold! I've a lot of new characters to introduce. Can't wait to bring the stripper --- I mean Gray around!


	18. HOME

Towards the end of their journey, time seemed to slow down.

As they passed through snowy forests, Lucy's mind grew more and more restless. Knowing she'd fulfill her biggest dream today felt so unreal. What if they wouldn't take her in? What if she wasn't talented enough to become an apprentice? But considering how fast her skills had increased, it wouldn't hopefully be the case.

She had heard there was a test for those willing to enter the College. One would have to cast a required spell, and failure meant denial of access. That stressed her the most, her magicka still depleted for overusing it yesterday. Would they take her in if she told them she was the Dragonborn? That she could prove, but should she if it had to stay as a secret?

Lucy had been waiting for this so long she feared it would all slip through her fingers.

As the road led them to a mountain's side, Lucy knew they were close. She placed her hands in her armpits as her fingers grew numb again. A pair of wool mittens weren't enough to keep her hands warm. The bench she sat on was padded with bear's thick pelt, which insulated her from the worst cold. However, as the sun's warming rays disappeared behind the mountains, she started to have a chill.

Wrapping tighter into her fur cloak, she struggled to get comfortable. After a long day of sitting still, her body ached for motion or being able to lay down and stretch. She almost hoped she could travel like Natsu, but once she'd seen him puking out his breakfast she envied him no more.

The mage curled up in a ball on the floor of the cart, covered under fur blankets. Lucy wasn't sure if he was asleep or not. He had grabbed the edge of the blanket, gripping it with white knuckles. Natsu had been okay for the first ten minutes, but then it had begun. His face had lost color as he tried not to throw up. And when the road made its first curve, he had stooped outside the cart and puked until there was nothing left in his stomach.

Since then he had lied at Lucy's feet without uttering a single word.

Beside her wonders and worries about joining the College, Lucy had been thinking about him and the Aretino boy. She had kept her emotions contained in the morning and she still did, even though the boy's fate disturbed her a lot. If it had a disheartening impact on her she couldn't imagine what Natsu must've been feeling. To him, it was much more personal.

Lucy looked at the mage again, smiling gently. Lucy had always been a person her friends had trusted with their problems, and she had done her best to help them. Listening to others had made her forget her own pain for a while. No matter how macabre the morning had been, she was glad it got him to talk to her. His words had been raw and quiet, smothered by years of suppressed pain.

Though all of her former friends were gone now, Lucy's desire to help wasn't. Natsu had saved her life and taught her magic, so hearing out things he evaded to tell was the least she could do.

She had hoped they could've continued their discussion while on the road, but silence was all she got. Lucy had wanted to hear about his adventures, people of the College, the teachers, about everything. What kind of lessons did they have? Where did the students live? How many books were in the library? Guess she had to find out herself, the mage's speech paralyzed by his sickness.

Lucy let her eyes rest on the dimming sky. The sunset painted it in shades of purple and red, the horizon melting into the Sea of Ghosts. Blinding white fields of snow separated them from the ocean steaming in the distance. Natsu had told that the snows usually came during this time of a year. When the other world bid farewell to the summer, it was already the end of autumn in Winterhold.

It was the end of Last Seed, and waters were already freezing. In Helgen that point would be months away. If it were this cold now, how cold would it be in the heart of winter? Would she ever get used to it, or would she long for the warmth she had in the south? But she was a Nord, made to survive through ice and snow. Of course she would get used to it.

At least she wanted to believe.

A faint shape of a building appeared through the mist far in the distance. It looked like it stood in the sea on a lone stone pedestal. Placed at the end of the road, at the end of the world, it couldn't be anything else than the silhouette of the College.

"Are were there soon?" Lucy asked from the mage. "I can see something on the horizon."

The mage opened his eyes, weakly raising his head and falling down before he could see.

"I don't know but I fucking hope we are."

"You hanging in there?"

"Yeah", he mumbled. "Like hanging in a rope."

Lucy chuckled, hoping he was exaggerating.

"It's not a long way to go", the carriage's driver hollered. He was an elder man but said he was the fastest rider in all of Tamriel. Lucy couldn't see any difference to any other rider, but maybe they all said that.

Lucy watched as the silhouette in the distance became clearer and sharper which every passing minute.

_Soon._

By the time they arrived the sun had already set. The lights of the College pierced through the darkness, and Lucy's heart dropped as she saw the city. More exactly, it wasn't a city anymore. Once the capital of Skyrim, now only a ruin. Most of Winterhold had plunged into the sea, and destroyed buildings stood behind the few houses left unscathed by the disaster.

The carriage stopped next to the inn, and the driver got up to help Lucy from the cart. She took the old man's hand as she stepped out, her legs numb and tingling as blood returned to them.

"What's the matter with him?" the man asked, pointing at the mage who still hadn't got up. "Is he going back to Windhelm or what?"

"I'll handle it", Lucy replied smiling. "Natsu! Get your ass over here, now!"

"Can't a man die in peace? Goddammit."

"No corpses in my cart", the driver stated and climbed into the wagon. He tossed aside the blankets and grabbed the mage from his neck and belt. As if he was as light as a child, the man threw him out of the cart. A cloud of snow puffed in the air as he dropped to the ground next to Lucy.

"It was a good ride", the mage muttered ironically. "But it's even better now it's over."

Lucy chuckled, wondering if he could get up on his own. The mage groaned and pushed himself from the ground, wiping snow from his robes and stretching his back.

The driver climbed back to the cart, grabbed the bridles, and whipped them gently. Upon his command, the horse began trotting, turning the carriage around to leave back on the road they had come from. When they were out of Lucy's sight, she took a better look at their destination.

An inn stood on the right side of the street, a Jarl's longhouse on the opposite side. A few chickens roamed freely between the buildings, pecking grains among the snow-covered cobblestones. The place was so eerily silent Lucy thought they'd arrived in a ghost town. Only a single guard patrolled the street, making Lucy wonder who he was looking after? The chickens?

The guard noticed them, raising his glare from the chickens to the mage.

"Natsu?" the guard asked. Natsu turned towards the voice, revealing his pink hair under his hood, thus confirming the guard's guess. He had to be known around here. "So you've returned. Seems like I'll be busy again…"

Natsu grinned at him. "Good to be home."

"Just try not to set anything on fire, all right?"

Natsu didn't answer as he began walking down the street. Lucy followed him and nodded to the guard as they passed by him.

The books did the College no justice when Lucy finally saw it with her own eyes, the sight telling more than the thousands of words Lucy had read.

Gasping, Lucy stopped before a gate. It opened to a stone bridge that crossed a shaft, leading to the free-standing pillar made of rock and ice where the College was built on. Except that it hadn't been built there. The ground surrounding it had fallen into the sea during the Great Collapse a century ago.

"Come on", Natsu said, climbing up the stairs and stopping in the shelter of the gate. "The bridge can be a bit flimsy, so watch your step."

Lucy walked after him, feeling magic seeping from the rock as she placed her foot on it. She took a deep breath as she adored the eye-shaped pattern carved on the ground. She had seen it before in the robes of the mages from the College. How many mighty wizards had walked here, in the same place where Lucy now stood?

A brazier was built where the bridge made a turn, but instead of fire, magic fluttered there. Blue, circling magic enlightened the entrance, guiding Lucy forward. They climbed up, the bridge growing narrow and rumbled. Stones had fallen into the ocean far below, and glancing down made Lucy's stomach twist.

She grabbed the intact railing to feel more steady while Natsu just leaped past the broken parts like it was nothing. The fall had to be a hundred metres at least, and Lucy didn't want to take that fall.

Lucy sighed from relief when they reached the end of the bridge, arriving at the closed iron gates. She stopped by Natsu's side, staring at it in awe. The walls of the College towered high upon them, almost as if reaching the sky.

"Hey! Anyone still up? I lost my key!" Natsu shouted and banged his fist on the iron, making it clatter against its hinges.

Lucy lowered her gaze from the walls to the courtyard. Another magical brazier was located in the middle, giving light to the entire yard. A statue of Shalidor, the first Arch-Mage was erected behind it, but more than that, Lucy couldn't see yet.

She had thought the College would be crowded with mages, but it didn't seem to be the reality. Maybe most of them were already asleep? It would be smart to go to sleep early if the lessons started at cockcrow.

Then someone walked behind the iron gate.

"Oh, you", a man's voice asked, scoffing. "Wasn't expecting to see you around anymore."

Lucy's eyes caught a pale figure moving closer, and from Natsu's sour expression, Lucy deemed he knew the man.

"You were waiting for me? How sweet of you."

"Who's she?" the man asked, eyeing at Lucy while ignoring Natsu's ridicule. "Did Igneel get turned into a woman or did you finally get yourself a girl? Or did Igneel become your girl?"

Lucy's cheeks flushed, the warmth almost making her miss the sensitive subject the man had either accidentally or purposefully touched. She and Natsu were just becoming friends, and Lucy couldn't even imagine them ever being anything more.

But to be honest, Lucy couldn't see him ever being anything with anyone. The way he had turned down a woman in Fort Amol made it clear. Either he was too dense to get a hint or then he simply didn't have an interest in that kind of a thing. Maybe that inspired the jokes among his fellow mages.

Thanks to Natsu's grim expression, Lucy managed to turn her thoughts away.

"Shut up, man", Natsu spat out, managing to ignore the talk about Igneel. "She's Lucy. Now open this fucking gate."

After a second of silence, the man opened the gates. As the iron bars shifted aside, Lucy got a better look at him. His chest was bare instead of white robes as Lucy had first thought, only short pants covering his nakedness. His dark eyes glimmered behind his charcoal-black, spiky hair, glaring at Lucy.

"Why am I not surprised you're half-naked again?" Natsu scoffed, looking down at the man's muscular body. "Get dressed already, you damn creep."

The black-haired answered by lifting his shoulders. "I'm just training as always", he said, seeming relaxed despite his lack of clothing. Wasn't he getting cold? Lucy had a fur cloak around her and she was shivering.

"Training to freeze your balls off?"

Lucy pinched her brows as she wondered what was going on between those two. Natsu's tone was playfully hostile, one kind of Lucy hadn't heard before. As if a lot of bad blood had spilled in the past.

Lucy glanced at the man again, his bare body sturdy and tall. He had the features of a Nord, and suddenly she remembered one thing Natsu once said.

" _There's a crazy Nord in the College who barely wears any clothes. His name is Gray, and he'd go into a snowstorm in his underwear."_

Judging from that, he couldn't be anyone else than Gray.

As his head tilted towards the magelight roaming in the brazier, Lucy noticed his eyes weren't black, but gray. Was that how he got his name? "I wouldn't be judging other man's balls if I were you, you little fiery shit."

Lucy clenched her hands into fists inside her mittens. Natsu was about to retort, but Lucy interrupted him.

"Could you just stop, both of you?" She raised her voice. "Joining this College is my biggest dream, so if you want to argue about your manly parts go do it somewhere else."

Natsu turned away from Gray and whispered to Lucy, "Don't mind him, he's always like that." Loud enough for the man to hear.

Lucy rolled her eyes, sighing. There was nothing to praise about Natsu's behavior either, the two of them equally childish. Gray didn't bother to argue with him anymore.

"Anyway, if you want to join the College, Mirajane is talking with Makarov right now", Gray said as he walked away. "You should wait until they get their business over with."

"Actually, I have something to say to Makarov as well", Natsu answered with sharp bitterness in his tone, meeting Gray's quizzical stare. "Igneel's dead."

The words brought him into a halt, all annoyance vanishing from Gray's eyes. He mumbled an apology, but Natsu didn't stay to hear it. He grabbed Lucy from the sleeve of her robes and dragged her to the door behind Shalidor's statue. Lucy watched how Gray disappeared into the dark as Natsu's hand on her back pushed her indoors.

* * *

The sound of a heavy wooden door slamming shut echoed in the entry hall.

Lucy put back her hood, perfect awe freezing her body. Shivering becoming chills, she stared into the great, circular hall opening behind another iron gate.

"Sorry 'bout that", Natsu said behind her. "I can't stand being around that annoying pervert."

Lucy stayed silent. Suddenly she just forgot everything that had just happened, the astounding beauty of the College capturing her fully. The architecture itself was magical, every detail in the walls carefully thought out. She lost herself in the ornaments adorning the gate, not listening at all as Natsu continued his quibble.

"At least he had his pants on this time. Most often he doesn't. He might be wearing robes one second and the next he's butt naked. Don't know how he does it, or why… It creeps me out. Anyway, let's climb up to the Arch-Mage's quarters."

"So Mirajane is the master wizard?" Lucy asked, somehow recalling what Natsu had told earlier.

"Yes. She's all sweet and charming until you make her angry. She's a master of Alteration and can transform herself into a daedric demon. Hope you don't need to ever see that. Damn, she's like Erza when she's mad, except worse", Natsu said, suddenly seeming awkward. He had surely made her mad quite a few times. Natsu rubbed his neck, noticing Lucy was still staring into the hall. "Anyway, here's the Hall of the Elements. It's where most of our lessons are kept. Sometimes we train in the courtyard or and sometimes we make expeditions into some ancient ruins, but almost always we are just here."

"It's so beautiful", Lucy answered quietly.

"I'm sure Mirajane will give you a proper tour later, but there's the Arcanaeum", Natsu told then, pointing to the door at their right. "It's the boring hall. All the books are here. Don't mess with the Librarian though. Levy is nice but very protective about her books."

Lucy nodded, hiding her chuckle. She had no doubt how Natsu had learned that. Instead of letting her see the library now, Natsu led her to the other door.

"Here are the Arch-Mage's quarters", he said and tested the iron knob. It wasn't locked. "We apprentices must not bother the Arch-Mage until it's absolutely necessary, but well, I think now it is. Deaths, they have to be reported directly to Makarov. And it seems Mirajane forgot to lock the door."

Natsu stepped into the dark stairway, Lucy following right behind him. They climbed up the stone steps and arrived at another door. Natsu knocked before entering, not waiting if anyone would open.

"Hey, it's me", he said, interrupting the quiet chatter. "It's important."

Lucy lingered in the staircase for a moment, hesitantly stepping into the lobby. She eyed at the walls lined with bookshelves, her gaze leading into the chamber ahead of them. In front of an indoor garden stood a very short, grey-bearded man talking to a beautiful, white-haired elven woman. Both of them had their eyes locked on Natsu, as if Lucy wasn't there at all.

"Natsu?" the Arch-Mage Makarov wondered, his elderly voice filled with confusion. He turned towards him, walking closer. His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward, taking support from his staff. "It is really you."

Natsu scratched the back of his head, nervously avoiding the man's examining gaze. "You're all acting like I'm supposed to be dead."

"It's because we received a letter from the Imperial Legion a week ago, saying you and Igneel will be executed in Helgen", the elven woman said, concern and worry showing through her. She had to be the Master Wizard, Mirajane. "They described what you did, and made it clear such destruction would no longer be tolerated, or the whole College would pay."

"But since you're here now, we assume something went wrong. You managed to escape?" Makarov asked. Natsu had an answer ready.

"Yeah, a dragon went wrong."

"So it's true then. The dragons have returned", Makarov sighed, his old eyes finding Lucy. She was still standing in the doorway, not daring to step in. "Igneel did not make it, then?"

Against Lucy's expectations, Natsu remained perfectly calm. Lucy knew he had feared this moment, but here he stood, bravely facing whatever reaction he would receive.

"He didn't."

The old man closed his eyes, falling silent for a moment. He had known the answer, but Lucy could see how his shoulders went stiff from the weight of an apprentice's death. How much the Arch-Mage took part in the student's lives, Lucy didn't know, but it was clear he didn't take the news easy.

"I always knew one of you would one day come back alone. Perhaps I was part right, part wrong", the Arch-Mage said then. "Who's this new face by your side? What business does she have?"

Lucy froze, not knowing what to say. She didn't want to break the gloomy atmosphere, feeling like dishonoring the dead if she'd speak – and disrespectful to the Arch-Mage if she wouldn't.

"I'm Lucy", she said then and cleared her throat. "I wish to join this College. I want to learn about magic and wield it as powerfully as my ancestors once did."

The surprise in the old man's eyes made Lucy doubt if she had said something wrong. Did she interrupt a custom of a sort? Had she been too hasty or inappropriate? Was she supposed to be invited into the College instead of asking to join?

"You do?" Mirajane answered, stepping in as Makarov silenced. Lucy figured Makarov wasn't the one to choose new apprentices. "Those wishing to enter must show some degree of talent with magic. Could you demonstrate your skills for us?"

Nervousness bubbling in her chest, Lucy bit her lip and took off her mittens. She put them on her belt, clenching her fingers, still numb from the cold. She felt Natsu's eyes on her, knowing he'd oppose it, but she didn't care.

"Can't we do this tomorrow?"Natsu asked, the question directed to her. "We've had a long journey, she'd surely do better after some rest. And we have to -"

"I can take the test now. What do you want me to cast?" Lucy said, trying to sound more confident than she was.

This was the moment she had been waiting for, and she wouldn't let it pass by.

"Excellent", Mirajane said, clasping her hands. "A standard spell for one skilled in Conjuration is _Conjure Familiar._ Do you know the spell?"

"Yes", Lucy said, relief filling her heart. "Wait a moment."

Lucy concentrated, trying to find magic from her tired blood. Collecting shards of her power into her palms, she prepared the gate, purple light swirling on her fingers. But the moment she tried to open the portal, it fell apart, the shimmers dying into the air. Lucy let out a frustrated sigh.

Just as she feared, she didn't have enough magicka.

"It's alright", Mirajane consoled. "You can try again later. You show great enthusiasm, and if you keep training, maybe you'll –"

"But I... But I..."

Natsu walked beside her, giving her a supportive pat on her shoulder. "Lucy's real good, she's just tired. She could, uhm, stay with me until she passes the test?" he said nervously. "What about getting some sleep first, Lucy? I'll show you my soul gem collection or something -"

Lucy shoved his hand away. "You can go sleep, but I won't until I've proved myself worthy of staying here."

"Lucy -"

She gathered her voice, raising her eyes from the floor into Mirajane. Desperation made her whole body tremble as the terror of not being accepted flooded over her. "Right now my magicka is depleted, but would you still grant entry to -"

"A descendant of Conjurer Anna?"

Makarov had sat down in his chair, everyone's heads turning at him when he spoke so suddenly. Air stuck in Lucy's throat.

"W-what?" she stuttered.

"There's no doubt of it. The looks, the wits... it's all like hers. Do you happen to have a relative named Anna, who was master at conjuration?"

Lucy blinked rapidly in disbelief. "Yes, my great-grandmother was Anna, and she was a conjurer. She'd... she'd be around 90 if she'd still live, but she died far before I was born. You knew her?"

"I knew her very well. She was a friend of mine, right here in the College."

"... here?"

Lucy glanced at Natsu, seeing his face as surprised as hers.

"She was a scholar here in her prime days, before her daughter was born", Makarov explained. "She settled down in Helgen after your grandmother's birth, disconnecting herself from the College. I've always been waiting for her offspring to wound up here. The magic was strong her blood, all her ancestors being mages as well."

In loss of words, Lucy stared at Makarov, unable to believe what she just heard. Mother had never mentioned Anna being in the College. Lucy had thought Anna had been only a free mage, practicing magic on her own. Why didn't Mother tell her?

"I think you'd make a superb addition in the College, Lucy", Makarov said then, smiling. "No need for any show-off. Right, Mirajane?"

"That's... That's alright", the elven woman agreed, the hint of doubt fading from her voice. "You can show us your skills once you've rested. Welcome, apprentice. Let's add your name in our books and make it official, shall we?"

Warmth spread from her smile into her whole body, the frightened trembling fading. Here it was, her biggest dream, just fulfilled. She had thought of joining the College as a goal itself, but right there she understood it was only a mere beginning.

The beginning of everything she ever dreamt of.

* * *

After signing Lucy as a student, Mirajane gave her a set of novice robes and told her the quick basics of studying and living in the College. It was getting late, so she promised to tell more tomorrow morning before the first lessons she'd attend.

Natsu twirled a key in his hands as they walked down the stairs, arriving in the Hall of the Elements. He lost the keys to his room while imprisoned, so Mirajane gave him a spare one. Ironically, he knew how to pick Igneel's lock but not his own. Upon their common agreement, Igneel's old room was given to Lucy. Something about it unsettled him, but he convicted himself Igneel wouldn't be needing it anymore.

Yet still, packing Igneel's things into a chest, emptying the room of his personal belongings made his death so horridly final.

Swallowing his grief, Natsu opened the large door leading to the courtyard. Mirajane had asked if he could give Lucy a brief tour while she'd prepare the room for Lucy, and Natsu had agreed. Despite knowing the College better than his own pockets, he didn't know where to start.

It didn't feel like home anymore, the walls familiar but the atmosphere lonely.

"There's the Hall of Attainment", he said while walking across the yard, pointing his finger to the right tower. "It's where I live. Igneel's room is in the first floor while mine's in the second."

Lucy looked down, a stunned smile still not fading from her lips. "Does your brother still have a room?"

"Yes, in the Hall of Countenance. It's where scholars and high-ranked wizards live, right on the other side of the yard. His room is locked though. Only Happy can get in. The spare key was given to Mavis back then."

' _Where's Happy by the way?_ ' Natsu wondered by himself, disappointed the ghost cat hadn't come to greet him yet. _'I bet he's on the roof as always.'_

Natsu opened the heavy door of the Hall of Attainment, letting Lucy walk in before him. Warmth embraced him as he walked into the vestibule, another brazier lit in the middle of a circular tower. Doors lined the walls, and a staircase started on the opposite side of the hall. Some doors were open, allowing distinct chatter to travel through the air. Not everyone was asleep.

"How many rooms are in one tower?" Lucy asked, counting the doors.

"Fifteen here for apprentices. There are extra rooms for dining, a few storages, an alchemy lab and an enchanting room. Downstairs is the washing chambers, but be warned, the water is always cold."

There was one thing Natsu wanted to say to Lucy but didn't. He had noticed how she had almost slipped and revealed her identity as the Dragonborn. Natsu wanted to point her out for it but knew there were too many ears in the tower. Secrets spread like wildfire among the College when once set loose.

Lucy had been way too reckless today, and Natsu hoped it wouldn't be permanent. Otherwise, their mission to save the world from dragons wouldn't be a great success. Even Natsu knew when to act serious, but today Lucy had been on the verge of losing it.

"Igneel's room is behind that door, next to Gray's", Natsu said, gesturing towards the door closest to the staircase. "Mine's upstairs, but it's... It's kinda messy. Let's just drop our bags there before taking a look around?"

Lucy nodded, following him up the stairs. Like a phantom hand grasping at his throat, Natsu felt his grief creeping back again. He shoved it to the background, not giving it space to thrive.

Natsu sighed as they reached the second floor and saw Laxus, the Arch-Mage's grandson, and his friends sitting in the dining room drinking mead. Laxus gave him a confused glare before raising his hand to greet him. Natsu lifted his hand in return, only faintly touching his own cheek. He had no energy to deal with anyone, knowing they all had the same question in mind. A question too painful to answer.

He walked to the second door on the left and placed the key in the lock. The old key got stuck from the edges, forcing him to violently thrust it in. It creaked and rattled, but luckily the door opened before he lost his nerves.

"Home sweet home", Natsu mumbled and swung his bag away from his shoulders. Lucy peeked past him into his room, her eyes widening at the sight.

"Kinda messy?" she asked, almost as a squeal. "Have you _ever_ cleaned here?"

Natsu stepped in, casting a magelight into the ceiling. He threw his bag on his unmade bed, relieved to have its weight off his shoulders. That's what his room was for: dumping the extra weight, mostly on the floor. Natsu wasn't much of an organizer, and it showed.

"Once, when Mira threatened to capture my soul in one of these gems if I wouldn't place them on the shelf."

Memories from his former adventures adorned the wall shelves and empty mead bottles collected dust on the night table. Worn clothes laid on the floor, piling up to reach his knees as he walked to the cabinet. Alchemy ingredients, random jewels, potions, notes and books… there was no end to the clutter. Lucy stood frozen in the doorway as she stared at the mess.

Natsu shoved his hand into his pocket, picking up the dragon tooth he collected yesterday. He twirled it in his fingers while looking for a suitable place for it. "Well, where should I put this?"

"Didn't think of you as a hoarder."

"Hoarder? I'm just collecting things from my travels. Mementos, you know", Natsu said, placing the dragon tooth between two black soul gems. On the same shelf was a bent piece of metal, formed in an oval shape. "I found this in a Dwemer ruin near Dawnstar. Isn't it cool? It's thousands of years old."

Lucy furrowed her brow, finally stepping into the room. She sat down on a chair next to the door, moving her backpack into her lap. "It's just scrap metal."

"It was attached to a Dwarven spider I destroyed. Strangely, the Dwarves have been gone for... I don't know how long, but their creations are still functional, performing whatever things their masters once tasked them with."

"Sounds haunting."

"Dwemer ruins are haunting. A whole civilization lost to the ages. You've probably read about it. But it was fun to explore the ruins with Igneel. Lots of traps though." Natsu chuckled at a memory surfacing in his mind. "Damn, Igneel almost lost his prick into a spinning blade trap. Was it the same trip I got this from? Maybe. That explains why I'd drag it along."

Lucy pinched her eyes closed. "Please don't tell me more -"

"You know, he went to take a piss and accidentally stepped on a pressure plate, activating a hidden blade, and it... it almost sliced his dick off... The way he screamed was even funnier than the whole thing."

Lucy stared at Natsu, pressing her lips into a thin line and holding her breath. Then she broke into laughter, still trying to hold it back. Natsu smiled as he put the metal back to the shelf. To him, the joke wasn't that funny anymore, but back then he had laughed so much he ended up rolling on the floor, gasping for air through his spasmed lungs.

Would he ever laugh like that again? Sure, Lucy was also funny sometimes, Natsu doubted things like that would happen with her.

"Are you hungry?" Natsu asked, searching for an excuse to leave his room. There was nothing more to see, even though every item held a story to tell. Going through them would take hours and many ales. "I'll eat something before showing you around. There are too many stairs to walk with an empty stomach."

"The tour can wait 'til tomorrow. Even though it's so amazing to be there, I'm too tired for it", Lucy answered with a sigh, her laughter now gone. "So yeah, let's eat while Mirajane gets the room ready."

Natsu agreed, the long day taking its toll on him too. But despite his exhaustion, he didn't feel sleepy. It was sometimes like that after coming home after a long journey. An ale or two would surely help with that, prevent him from tossing and turning and staring into the dark ceiling until it would be dawn.

Lucy's gaze lingered on the soul gems as Natsu rose, questions appearing in her brown eyes. He had collected quite a few of them indeed, his last count being fifty-six. Most of them weren't filled. It crept him out to store souls of the animals inside the crystals, but he thought they were pretty as they were.

While Natsu locked the door, Lucy found herself into the dining room. It was a small hall with a long table with benches on each side. There were an oven and a fireplace for the students to cook their own food from the ingredients stored in barrels. Natsu rarely cooked, though. Mirajane always made sure everyone had a hearty meal, the woman preparing a huge kettle of stew every day.

It wasn't a Master Wizard's duty to do, but Mira loved to cook and bake. She said she forgot the worries of the world while dipping her fingers in the dough. Natsu never had an older sister, but he thought of Mira as one. He had lost count of how many times she had healed his burns and bruises when his training went too far during his novice years.

But besides her and Igneel, Natsu never really had other friends in the College, and he only realized it now.

"All food is for everyone", Natsu said and took a bowl for himself. "Personal treats shouldn't be stored here though. Leave your sweet rolls on the table and they'll be gone in a blink of an eye."

Lucy nodded, picking up apples, bread, and cheese. They sat down on the vacant end of the table, Laxus and his friends still eating on the other side. The Thunder Tribe they were called, the elven mages specializing in shock magic. Natsu rarely had any business with them and didn't really want to. Being the Arch-Mage's grandson had gotten into Laxus's head long ago, the young man more arrogant than Natsu liked to deal with.

"Hey Blondie", Laxus hollered to Lucy. "You're new here, yes? Haven't seen your face before."

"Uhm, yes", Lucy stuttered, hiding her mouth in a mug. "I'm Lucy. Just joined."

"Good. There ain't too many pretties here. Be seeing you around."

Natsu squeezed his fingers around the wooden spoon, staring Laxus from below his brows. The tall, blond Breton man was known for his ill intentions, often mocking the newcomers for the sakes of his own fun. Especially Gray got hazed by Laxus when he joined three years ago, the two still not standing each other.

To Natsu's relief, Laxus's group finished eating and left, letting silence fall into the dining hall. Laxus had something in his eyes which Natsu had rarely seen before. A pitying look, the closest thing to condolences the man would ever get.

His appetite suddenly gone, Natsu forced the stew down his throat. It was made from chicken, cabbage, and onions, but the flavor was gone, dulled by sadness. He and Igneel had lived in their own bubble, and everything was just so different now it was broken. Was this hollow silence how things would be from there on? Would everyone always look at him with that fucking pity in their eyes?

"Thank you", Lucy said suddenly, cutting him off from his thoughts.

"What?"

"Thank you for taking me here."

Natsu turned to look at her. "Anytime", he answered, instantly realizing it didn't really make any sense. Lucy didn't seem to mind, the woman silencing again to finish her apple.

When Lucy had eaten, they left their bowls and mugs on the dish table. Natsu thought he'd go straight to bed and drink the ales he had stored, but then he heard Mirajane's voice from downstairs.

"Natsu, come here!"

Letting out a tired sigh, Natsu headed into the stairs, his legs feeling heavy as logs. Mirajane stood at Igneel's door with an open chest beside her. He and Lucy walked to her, and Natsu's heart dropped into his stomach when he looked into the box.

Igneel had used soul gems the way they were supposed to. Instead of putting them on display, he trapped souls in them and used them in enchanting his weapons and armor. The gems on the bottom of the chest gleamed, the souls dancing inside of them.

"Do you want them?" Mira asked. "I know you collect soul gems."

"No thanks."

"You want to keep anything? I'll store his personal items away, but his robes will be given back to the College."

Natsu shook his head faintly and grasped his white scarf. "I don't need his clutter to remember him from."

Mirajane's eyes widened as she recognized the pattern on Natsu's scarf. Her lips twitched into an inward smile, brows tilting slightly to the side.

The mage's shoulders tensed as Mirajane suddenly wrapped her arms around them, pulling him against her chest.

"I'm so sorry for you", she whispered into his hair, so silent he could barely hear. "I know what it feels like to lose your kin."

Usually, Natsu didn't like being touched or hugged, but now he accepted Mira's embrace. It was genuine empathy, lacking pity he despised. Natsu knew where it came from. Mira was still haunted by her own loss, the accidental death of her little sister still weighing her down.

"Yeah."

"We thought we lost both of you, so I'm glad at least you made it back. The College has been awfully quiet the last few weeks."

Natsu pushed himself apart from the embrace, flashing a quick, fake smile and lowering his gaze to the floor of Igneel's room. His eyes locked to the chair next to the shelf. Air stuck in his throat because for the briefest moment he could see vividly see Igneel sitting there, reading books about the greatest deeds of his ancestors.

"I know", Natsu mumbled. "Still is."

Mirajane didn't say anything, but Natsu felt her eyes on him. He bit his lips, fighting back a sudden wave of emotions he knew he couldn't keep at bay much longer.

"You'll be fine from here?" Natsu asked, turning to Lucy. He knew she would be okay. She was in a good mood, bubbly happy even, and Mirajane wouldn't let her get lonely. 

"Yes", she answered. "You can get to sleep."

"Good night, then."

"Good night."

Natsu stormed upstairs, the route from Igneel's room to his own so familiar he could walk it even in his sleep. He picked up the key, turning it in the lock while holding back the damn tears.

And when he finally got into the lonely safety of his own room, they fell.

Coming home had never felt so fucking bad.

Torn between not wanting to be alone right now and not wanting anyone to see him crying, Natsu dragged himself to bed. He lied down in the dark and hid under all the blankets he had, still unable to cast away the coldness from his bones.

He had felt the same five years ago, the day he first arrived in College in late autumn. Laying awake in the same bed, staring into the same ceiling, feeling just as lonely. He had made all the way up here only to find his brother had been missing for a year already. The thought of a happy reunion had pushed him through the darkest moments but left him empty-handed.

His memories of the first days were shrouded in mist. His brother's disappearance had chased away his rest, his mind going through every possible scenario when he was supposed to sleep. Everyone knew as little as him, making him question what was the point of coming here after all. But he had no other home to go back to, what was done was done. His choices were going back to the streets and forests or settling into the College.

It had been his third day when Igneel found him crying in the dining room at night, trying to force himself to eat Mirajane's stew.

" _Don't let Mira catch ya crying at her food_ ", Igneel had said. " _She'll turn into a demon._ "

Instead of ignoring him and walking away, Igneel had sat next to him to eat his own dinner. He had talked about everything except Zeref, Natsu's answers slowly changing from grunts into whole sentences.

So had begun the friendship which lasted into Igneel's last breath.

A door creaked, but no light got in. Flinching, Natsu raised his head, noticing his closet being suddenly opened. A ghostly tail swung beside the bed before a cat jumped on Natsu's stomach.

"Happy!" the mage shrieked. "You scared the shit out of me."

The cat leaned closer to his face, sniffling him with its whiskers ticking Natsu's cheeks. Despite being a conjured animal and being able to go through walls, it manifested as a corporeal being, Natsu feeling its weight as it kneaded his chest.

Had it been hiding in his closet all this time?

Happy curled up on his stomach, calming Natsu with its peaceful purring.

Natsu didn't know where the thought came from, but suddenly he realized his friendship with Igneel didn't have to end. Death might have separated them, but it wouldn't break their bond.

Just like his brother was still alive in a distance away, why wouldn't Igneel still exist in another plane? Natsu hadn't believed in afterlives before, but how could he know what came after death? Happy was Zeref's sign of showing he was still there, so maybe, just perhaps Igneel could also somehow tell him his spirit carried on, watched over his path, waiting for them to meet again.

All he'd need was the smallest sign, even in a dream, and then he'd know he'd one day feel like home again.

* * *

A/N: Photos from the College. More in the next chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me a whole month to update! I rewrote chapter 2 and part of chapter 3 before starting working on this chapter, but at least I managed to stick in my goal of writing one new chapter per one month.
> 
> And sorry for typos, it's late at night while I'm publishing this and I'll read it tomorrow with fresh eyes. My most common typo is accidentally messing personal pronouns. Like writing "Lucy closed his eyes" when I should write "Lucy closed her eyes". There's gender neutral personal pronoun in my mother tongue so that explains the mess ups. Anyway, if there are stupid things like that please forgive me. 
> 
> What did you think of the College? Not every member was introduced right ahead, and many characters from original Fairy Tail won't be in the College, but spirkled across the other guilds and factions (like Erza and Cana in the Companions etc). I'll also include some College characters from Skyrim, so there will be a mix of FT and Skyrim in the College.
> 
> I keep slipping into angst while writing Natsu's POV's, sorry 'bout that, I hope there isn't too much edgelordyness in this. But, considering it has been only 8 days since he lost his best friend it should be unrealistic to espect he'd be magically fine. Lucy also lost everything, but she's coping differently, because she's mostly dissociating due to the trauma. I want to keep their traumatic experiences in mind while writing this but I don't want to drag too much in the angst, you know?


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